Funny little one-shot about Luke from 1st season. From the episode "The Third Wheel'' I miss Luke! he was funny when he stopped being an ass to Ryan.

Luke's POV

Man, I'm hanging out here at that dude Oliver's place. I don't trust him, I mean he DOES have a pretty dope crib, I know Ryan doesn't doesn't trust him at ALL. I used to think Ryan was a complete psycho, but he had my back when I had trouble with some of the guys from the water polo team slashing my tires Anyways, back to Oliver. Yeah, Marissa met him in therapy. She said he has had some problems with drinking and depression. And he's all over Marissa. I know 'cuz that's how Ryan used to act when I was with Marissa. Well, only not as...screwed-up-stalkerish-slime-ballish. Oh, now they're talking bout Paris.

"Dude, French chicks don't even shave their armpits" And they DON'T either. I was trying to mack on this one chick name Moniqua (or something like that) and we were getting it on pretty hot and heavy until she pulled off her sweater and there was this stream of armpit hair sticking out form her arms. It was gross, i was so horrified of French chicks from that day out. I didn't even go out of the hotel room. NOw Oliver and Ryan are talking bout the Louvre and how dumb it was. Time to zone out and look interested.

Oh awesome, subject change. To snowboarding. Oliver actually boarded the Alps?

"Dude, you boarded the Alps? Shit, the closest I've ever came was Whistler." This isn't fair, physcho guy boards the Alps? and now they're talking bout some trip to Alps to teach Ryan how to snowboard. Hah that would be a sight to see! He'd be falling on his ass so much! Hah.

Yeah, these peeps think I don't get what's going on, I know EXACTLY what goes on. just 'cuz I got a blank stare on my face and everything. Wait, what are they talking about now? Rooney? HaHa rhymes with mooning. Man, which reminds of a FUN time at Jake's ( my buddy form the Polo team) place. We drove around in our speedos mooning our biggest rivals' houses. But what's Rooney? I mean is it an alcoholic drink? I sure haven't had one of THOSE in a loooooong time!

Oh, wait.

OH...

it's a band.

And their having a concert tomorrow?

Ah, what the hell. I got nothing better to do so I'll go. Rooney, what a gay name for a band. If it turns out to be a total bust I'll just point and call people freaks. HAH! that's a fun time right there.Yep,

OOOO Ryan just gave Oliver the death glare, I know what that looks like. He always gives it to me when I'm an ass. Oohhh, man that sounded nasty. No way am I a freaking homo.Of course, I AM on the water polo team, I could be in a more 'manly' sport such as football. But I chose WATER POLO instead! What was wrong with me? I mean even Cohen thinks water polo players are queers, and he wears sweater-vests and just has a "gay look" to him. Man, next year I'm going out for football. And why am I going on and on about GAY WATER POLO PLAYERS? WHAT IS FREAKING WRONG WITH ME?

anyways, this Thai stuff is good. I wonder what's it called?

haha Ryan just took a bite out of something Oliver told him was Fish brains. Oh Gawd, I'm not eating anymore of this crap!

The next night. At the concert.

"Dude, Cohen. There sure are a lot of freaks up in here, right?" I say to Cohen he just mutters some stupid smart-ass comment about "great way to make friends"

"DUDE! FREAK! FREAK OVER THERE! LOOK!" I said to Cohen, he just rolls his eyes. Queer...Oh thank gawd Oliver's here. And now we're going backstage, but I'm confused...

"Which one's Rooney?"

Marissa says, "They ALL are".

Oh, I SOO freaking knew that! YEP.

Later, at the concert.

So, I got to play my new song on guitar in Rooney's backstage dressing room. I honestly think I'm goin to get a record deal for my song "The First Time I Saw You, I Knew We'd Get It On" Yeah, The Grammies will be BEGGING me to come play at their place.

Mna, this concert is pretty good. I mean, I don't go for gay bands but I like this band. Their music is mellow and rocking at the same time. I should go buy their CD to use when I'm trying to get laid. Girls go for this music when they want to get 'in the mood' . I know from my John Mayer experience. THAT was a goooood time.

"I'M SH-H-Sh-H-SHAKIN'! I'M Sh-H-SHH-Shakin'! ROONEY! WOO HOO! ROONEY! I LOVE ROONEY! I'M SH-H-HAKING!" I start to sing, and people shrink away and are either pointing, laughing, or covering their ears at me. WHAT? A guy can't sing around here? Stupid Queers. I DO love that singer's hair. I should grow mine out like that. That would be sexy, girls will be BEGGING to get a piece of this. I'm such a stud. OOOO big loud speakers. I'm going to go a stand next to them, So I can see Rooney better.

The next day,

I have SUCH a HEADACHE. STUPID SPEAKERS. Ow

"SOMEONE PICK UP THE DAMN PHONE!" Oww, shouldn't have yelled that.

"AND GIVE ME SOME DAMN ASPIRIN!" Owww, REALLY shouldn't have yelled that

"DAMN IT PICK THAT STUPID PHONE UP NOW!" Owwww. Ok, I'm just gonn shut up. Someone's coming up to my room.

"Luke, honey. The phone's not ringing." my mom said.