This chapter's kinda late, and I don't really know why. I've had it done since before I posted the last one, but I never really got around to posting it. I think I forgot! Sorry.
Chapter Twelve: Fine, Be That Way: Mimi's Story……………………………………………………………
I woke up and rolled over. I squinted as my eyes adjusted to the amount light in my room. Yawning, I stretched and sat up, kicking the blankets off of me. I checked my calendar, which was on the nightstand beside my bed. It was Thursday, and Tai's coma had now reached day ten. I was beginning to lose hope, I must admit.
I was reminded of someone else, someone who was having a harder time dealing with this than I was: Sora. I hadn't talked to her since Monday morning, when we crossed paths for a brief minute or two. She was leaving the hospital; I was on my way inside.
I was about to get up and call her when I realized that it was way too early. Sure, Sora was normally an early-riser, but I couldn't be sure anymore. Besides, I don't really know if I want to talk to her right now.
The phone in my room rang, and I stood up to answer it. Daddy had installed a private phone line in my bedroom during high school because I talked far too much on our regular line. He was sick of having to pry me off the phone in order to make his business calls. Whatever, we both won in the end.
"Hello?" I said into the receiver when I finally picked it up, on it's fourth ring.
"Hey, Meems. What's up?" Matt's voice filled my head. I smiled weakly; slightly disappointed that it wasn't Sora. He doesn't see me, thank God.
"Not much. You're up pretty early today," I said curiously.
"Yeah, well, couldn't sleep so I figured I might as well get up," he chuckled. "You free today?"
I nodded, and he didn't know. I have a real habit of doing stuff like that, forgetting that I was on the phone and not in person. I needed to break it fast! "Yeah," I said quickly, realizing I still hadn't spoken.
"Great," he said enthusiastically. I laughed quietly to myself…since when was Matt so giddy?
"Do you have anything special in mind?" I asked.
"Well…I might have a few tricks up my sleeve," he said mysteriously.
"Oh, really?"
"Meet me at the park in an hour?" Matt asked anxiously. I nodded, realized what I did, and laughed. "What's so funny?"
"Nothing. I gotta go get ready if I'm meeting you in an hour, bye."
"Okay, bye. Love you," Matt said sweetly.
"Love you, too."
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I strolled through the park, looking around. I wasn't looking for Matt; I knew where he'd be. He would be at our spot, in front of our tree, where our initials were carved. He had done it with a pocketknife—tacky, I know, but totally sweet—when we first started going out. No, I was looking around at the scenery.
In the midst of all this craziness with school, exams and Tai, I had completely forgotten there was an outside world waiting to be discovered. Spring had come to a close, and summer had truly taken over. Flowers were in full bloom, the sun was shining, and people were outside taking part in all kinds of activity. There were kids on rollerblades and skateboards, parents taking their kids for ice cream, and joggers whizzing by in all directions. It seemed like everyone in Odaiba was outside today.
I smiled as I breathed in the sweet scent that could only come about in summer weather, and spotted Matt. He was about 50 yards away, and I could tell he was pacing in a small area beside "our" tree. As I got closer, I saw him run a hand through his slightly over-gelled blonde hair and use the other to pat something inside his pocket. He looked like he was talking to himself.
I got ever closer to him and tried to hear what he was saying, but it was to no avail. When I finally was able to make out his words, I burst out laughing. The sight before me—Mr. cool losing his cool—was truly hysterical. He jumped and spun around, flushing when he saw me.
"How long have you been standing there?" he asked me, sounding slightly nervous.
"Like five seconds, why?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. I wanted desperately to know why he was acting so strange today, but I thought better than to ask. I would figure it out all in due time, and if I pushed it I probably would never know. That was the way Matt worked, as I had come to figure out over the years.
"No reason…" he muttered, shaking his head. He ran his hand through his hair again, looking uneasy.
"Is everything okay?" I asked. I began to wonder if maybe something had happened to Tai, or something. No, I assured myself, there's no way he would sound so happy on the phone if that were the case. And if it were the case, surely he would have said something by now, right?
"Umm…yeah." I relaxed a bit, but not completely. He still looked like he needed to talk about something really major. Was it about us? Was he not happy with the way things were? Was I?
"Well…there's something on your mind. Why don't you just tell me already?" I asked impatiently. So what, I can't help it. I'm impatient; always have been, always will be.
He opened up his mouth, but lost his nerve and shut it again. I looked at him eagerly, urging him to spit it out.
"Okay, I'm just gonna get this over with. I mean, if I don't say it now, I never will…" Matt said nervously. It was almost laughable how nervous he was, but it was giving me an uneasy feeling. "Meems, we've been together for a long time and, well, you're happy with the way things are going, right?"
I zoned right out, staring into his deep, blue eyes. They really are the most gorgeous blue eyes I've ever seen. I didn't even notice that he had asked me a question, and felt kind of guilty when I finally did snap out of it. I had practically forced him to tell me what was up, and when he finally did, I didn't even listen. He repeated his question.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm totally happy with the way things are." I grew more nervous. "Why, aren't you?"
"Yeah, I'm really happy. In fact, I kind of think we should maybe…I don't know, start thinking about the future. I mean, with all the hectic stuff that's been going on, we haven't really had time to focus on us lately. We're not really moving forward anymore," he said.
What did he mean by that? Was it bad that we weren't moving forward? Oh God, he's going to break up with me, isn't he?
"Yeah, but we aren't moving backwards," I joked. He didn't laugh; I wondered if he even heard me.
"Right, yeah." I started to chew on my lip, waiting for him to break things off. "The other day at the hospital, I saw Steve—he's the drummer from my band—and it turns out he got shot."
"Oh my God, really? Is he okay?"
"Yeah, he's fine. But he started talking about how he realized life is short, and you need to seize every opportunity you get because you never know when it's gonna get taken away from you," he preached. I began to wonder where he was going with this, since I seemed to be missing the point entirely.
He paused, probably trying to make sure I was still listening.
"Oh," I said, causing him to nod in satisfaction and keep going.
"Anyway, he was right. It's true, I mean, you never know when you might lose the things you care about most in the world."
I held my breath, completely lost. This conversation was totally going right over my head.
"What are you trying to say, Matt?" I asked.
"I'm trying to say that it might not have been Tai. It could very well have been you. Or me. What I'm trying to say is…" he trailed off, not finishing his sentence.
Running his hand through his hair one final tine, he reached into his pocket, and pulled out a small jewelry box. I stared at him, still not breathing, as he knelt down onto one knee and opened the box. My breath caught in my throat, and I couldn't have exhaled if I wanted to.
"M-Matt…" I stammered.
"Meems, will you marry me?"
I was so shocked at first that I could have passed out. I slowly recovered, but still couldn't seem to find the words. I just nodded my head stupidly—this time he actually saw it, though—and took a few shallow breaths.
"Look, I'm pretty sure you nodded but I'm going to need you to say it out loud before I run home and lock myself in my room," he said with a nervous snicker. I snapped out of my temporary paralysis.
"Yes!" I screeched, grabbing his hand and pulling him up onto his feet. He took the ring and slowly placed it on my finger, grinning widely at me.
I know you must be thinking, 'isn't this the same girl who was thinking about dumping Matt just a few days ago?'
For starters, I was never going to dump Matt. I was only going to…I'm not sure, exactly. But I don't think I was going to dump him, does that help?
Regardless, things were different now. Things were different after what happened at the school.
I could have lost Tai, or Sora, or Matt…or even myself.
In fact, I came pretty damn close to losing myself.
Looking back, I don't think Davis would have shot me. He didn't have the guts, because he was a spineless coward. Only a spineless coward would do a shitty thing like what he did.
No, I almost lost myself in a different way. I was so consumed by what happened in that school that I was completely missing everything that happened after it. If I had my way, I would have just lived inside that memory, dwelling on it and replaying it over and over until I went totally insane—which I came pretty close to, by the way.
But I didn't have my way, thank God. Matt snapped me out of it because he cares about me. He cares about me more than anyone else does, just like I care about him.
I knew, at that moment, that I could never be with anyone else, at any other place, any other time, in any other way. Ever.
When he asked me, I was totally dumbfounded. I couldn't move, couldn't speak, I could barely see straight. It was like a fantasy world…a dream…something other than reality. And I realized that my biggest fear wasn't losing myself, daddy, mom, Sora, Tai, or anyone else. My biggest, most prominent fear was losing this moment…and Matt.
I've been through a ton of stuff, and I might never be the same. I might try to forget and move on for the rest of my life, and never really get back to the same place I was at. But with Matt by my side, I could get pretty damned close to it.
So to answer your question: no. That wasn't me who was going to dump Matt. I'm not the same girl that I was a week and a half ago.
I might never be, but I guess I'm okay with that.
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"Hello?" Mrs. Takenouchi said after two rings.
"Hi Mrs. Takenouchi, this is Mimi calling. Is Sora there?" I asked, trying to contain my enthusiasm.
"No," she said curiously, "I thought she was at the mall with you."
I froze. Clearly, Sora was hiding something from her mother. As her best friend, it was my duty to cover for her until further notice.
"Uh, yeah. I'm actually on my way there now. I was just calling to see if she needed a ride there, or if we were just going to meet. But I guess she's already left," I said quickly.
"Oh," Mrs. Takenouchi said, satisfied with my answer. I was pretty satisfied with it too; thinking on my feet had never been one of my strengths. "No, she just left to meet you, Mimi."
"Well, thanks," I said.
"No problem. It was nice to hear your voice. Sora and you haven't been getting together since…you know," she said. Sora's mom had always liked me. Maybe because I was the only thing in Sora's life that has been there through it all. Our best friendship is the only thing that hasn't changed since her parent's divorce. "Well, I should let you go. I wouldn't want to make you lose precious shopping time," she teased. Since I'm like a second daughter to her, and had practically grown up in her house, she knows how seriously I take things like shopping. "Goodbye, Meems."
"Mrs. Takenouchi?" I said quickly, before she had a chance to hang up.
"Yes, Mimi?"
"I'm engaged!"
That was why I called Sora. I had to tell someone, and I'd be damned if I didn't get to just because Sora was nowhere to be found.
With that, I hung up the phone and called Sora's cell. No answer there, either. Where was that girl?
……………………………………………………………
It had been two days, and I hadn't seen Sora since she left the hospital on Monday. I called her everyday, sometimes twice a day, but she never seems to be available.
The first time I called her—the time when she was supposedly at the mall with me—she wasn't home, duh. I still didn't know where she had gone, but I knew it was bad if she wouldn't even tell her mom where she'd gone. Sora and her mother used to have a pretty rocky relationship, but things had gotten better lately, hadn't they? I thought so, but maybe they hadn't.
The second time I called, her mother said she was sleeping. I didn't want to push her, since I knew that Sora hadn't gotten much sleep lately, so I just left it in Sora's hands to call me back. Guess what—she didn't.
The third time, it just kept ringing and ringing. When the answering machine finally picked up, I just slammed the phone down in a fit of anger. Sora's mother was probably at work, but I knew for a fact Sora was there. There was no doubt in my mind that she was there, staring at the phone, letting it ring and ring. I couldn't figure out why she was doing this. I was hurt, but I wasn't going to give up. Sora was my best friend, and I could tell that she needed me.
The fourth time, Mrs. Takenouchi said that Sora 'was too busy to come to the phone'. I gritted my teeth, forced a fake smile—which she couldn't see—and said I'd try again later.
The fifth and final time I called, Sora actually answered. If I recall correctly, her exact words were, "Meems, I don't feel good, I gotta go. Oh, by the way, congratulations on the whole engagement thing."
It was all I could do to keep from hopping in my car, driving to Sora's house, and beating her to a bloody pulp.
I can understand that Sora was going through a hard time. I can understand that she was tired and needed to catch up on her sleep. I'll accept that sometimes you can't be home and the answering machine will have to pick up for you. I can even sympathize that sometimes, you just don't feel like talking.
But this was unacceptable.
I had done nothing to Sora. I was—if anything—being overly friendly toward her. I didn't expect her to answer the phone and be her regular happy, perky self, but for God's sake, I deserved something! I'm her best friend, I just got engaged and she was barely even acknowledging it! That hurt, but I didn't say anything to her. I didn't have the nerve to call her back and tell her off. How could I, when the little voice inside my head kept saying 'come on, Meems, she's going through a hard time.'
Hard time or not, I was pissed.
I came to a decision as I hung up the phone. I loved Sora dearly, but I refused to let her ruin this time for me. This was supposed to be one of the happiest times of my life, and I would be damned if she squandered or belittled that because of her own messed up shit.
If she wanted to act like a selfish, spoiled brat, then fine. I'll let her.
Two can play at that game.
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