Return to Camelot
Part 4
Bobby Ewing lightly tapped his knuckle on the glass door of Sue Ellen's hospital room, as he tried to get J.R.'s attention. Bobby carried a garment bag for J.R. The garment bag contained a change of clean clothes, socks, underwear, and a pair of J.R.'s cowboy boots, in addition to a much-needed electric razor. J.R. turned his head away from Sue Ellen, to see who was tapping on the door.
Bobby took one look at J.R.'s unkempt appearance and his jaw dropped from shock. J.R. looked rough and rugged in his increasingly full beard. The silver and gray hair covering J.R.'s face made him look years older than his actual age of fifty-eight. Bobby found J.R.'s appearance interesting, to say the least, as Bobby smiled at J.R., while proudly displaying the garment bag he had brought for his eldest brother.
J.R. arose from his chair, and walked over to the door. J.R. closed Sue Ellen's door, and turned to face Bobby.
Bobby said, "Mamma and Clayton told me that you needed a few things. Judging from your beard, they were right."
J.R. gave Bobby a low chuckle, as he opened his arms to give Bobby a hug. Bobby sat the garment bag on the floor, as J.R. pulled him to his chest.
Bobby pulled away, and asked, "How is Sue Ellen doing, J.R.?"
J.R. turned his head over his shoulder, and glanced at Sue Ellen. She was sleeping in the fetal position, propped up on a pillow, to cushion the pain in her lower abdomen that she was feeling after her surgery.
J.R. turned around to face Bobby, and said, "The doctor said that she's not out of the woods, yet, but her condition seems to be improving."
Bobby cocked his head to one side, and asked, "How are you doing, J.R.?"
J.R. flashed Bobby a surprised look. How was he doing? J.R.'s focus had been entirely upon Sue Ellen. Yes, J.R. grieved for the child they had lost, but it hadn't occurred to him, until that instant, that J.R. hadn't eaten anything at all for two, long, arduous days.
J.R. asked, "Bobby, would you mind stayin here and keepin' an eye on Sue Ellen while I freshen up, and get me somethin' to eat?"
Bobby smiled, and patted J.R. on the shoulder, and said, "I'd be happy to help, J.R. Take all the time you need. Is Sue Ellen up for having visitors?"
J.R. said, "Yes, as long as the number of visitors in her room is kept at a minimum. I'll be right back. Uh…thanks, Bobby. I really do appreciate this."
J.R. bent over, and picked up his garment bag. He lifted the bag over his shoulder, and walked down the hallway. He turned the corner to look for a men's restroom. Bobby watched J.R. walk down the long hallway. Bobby felt a newfound respect for his older brother, similar to the way he felt about J.R. when they were much, much younger.
J.R. locked the door to the men's restroom, and hung the garment bag on the hook mounted behind the door. J.R. unbuttoned his shirt, and let it hang at his waist. J.R. unzipped the garment bag, and opened the zipper to look for his electric razor. J.R. plugged the cord to the razor into the electrical outlet, and powered on the razor. The 'buzzing' sound of the heads on the razor was instantly muffled as J.R. placed the razor on his face.
J.R. smiled, as he finished shaving his stubbly beard. He rubbed his hand over his face to see if he had neglected any place he should have shaved. His skin felt smooth to the touch, and he felt better, knowing that he was once again, clean shaven. J.R.'s thoughts wandered to Sue Ellen as he stepped underneath the showerhead.
J.R. silently thanked God for giving him the courage and strength to help Sue Ellen through this difficult time. J.R. prayed that he would have the emotional strength they would both need to deal with the loss of their unborn child. J.R. finished his shower, and turned off the water faucet. J.R. dried off, and changed into the clothes Bobby brought for him.
Bobby folded his arms across his chest as he sat next to Sue Ellen's hospital bed, watching Sue Ellen sleep. Sue Ellen's eyelids fluttered, as she opened her eyes, and glanced at Bobby.
Bobby grinned at Sue Ellen, and said, "Good morning, Sunshine. How are you feeling?"
Sue Ellen softly chuckled, and said, "I'm too heavily medicated to really tell. I'm glad you're here, though, Bobby. I was hopin' that someone would stop by, and make sure that J.R. got somethin' to eat. He hasn't left my side since they brought me in here."
Bobby asked, "Will you be alright, if we go to the cafeteria and get something to eat?"
Sue Ellen smiled and said, "Of course, Bobby. Dr. Chamberlain said that he would be coming by to examine me, and see how I'm doin'. Hopefully, he'll come by as soon as you leave, if not before. Where is J.R., now?"
Bobby leaned forward in his chair, and reached for Sue Ellen's hand, and said, "I brought a few things for him from the ranch. He's probably taking a shower, even as we speak."
Sue Ellen placed her hands on the railings, and pushed herself back against the mattress. Bobby asked her if she needed any help, Sue Ellen told him that she was getting very good at moving around in the bed, in spite of her pain.
Sue Ellen got situated in the bed, and said, "I'm glad you're here, Bobby. Now maybe J.R. won't walk around this hospital lookin like the Wild Man of Borneo."
Bobby laughed out loud at Sue Ellen's description of J.R. Sue Ellen tried to stifle her laughter to prevent the pain it would cause her in her abdomen. J.R. tapped on the observation window, and smiled at Sue Ellen. He wore a crisp white cotton shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and a pair of jeans.
Sue Ellen admired how handsome J.R. looked in the simple ensemble. His clean-shaven face made him look much younger, and much more presentable. J.R.'s deep blue eyes were bright as he lovingly gazed at Sue Ellen through the glass. The dark circles under J.R.'s eyes seemed to have diminished, and been replaced by the distinguished, fine lines he had acquired over time.
Bobby rose from his chair, and kissed Sue Ellen's cheek, saying, "We'll be back in a little while Sue Ellen. I've got my mobile phone, if you need to reach us."
Sue Ellen flashed Bobby a radiant smile, and said, "Thank you Bobby. Thank you very much."
J.R. stepped into Sue Ellen's room, and took her hand in his. J.R. leaned over the bed to give Sue Ellen a kiss, before going to the hospital cafeteria with Bobby.
J.R. said, "I won't be away for very long, Sugar. I'm gonna grab a quick bite to eat, then I'll be right back."
Sue Ellen said, "I'm sure the nurses can handle anything that might come up, J.R. Besides, Dr. Chamberlain told me that he'd stop by to look at my incision, and give me an informal post-op exam."
J.R. smiled at Sue Ellen as he said, "I love you, Darlin'. I'll be back soon."
Sue Ellen called out to J.R. as the door started to close behind him, "I love you, too, J.R. Thank you…for everything."
J.R. touched his fingers on the glass door, before turning, and walking away from Sue Ellen to join Bobby for breakfast. Sue Ellen leaned back against the mattress, and closed her eyes. She moved her hand to her stomach, and inhaled as she thought about the physical changes her body would have undergone if she had carried a baby to term. Sue Ellen tried desperately to keep her emotions at bay, as she lowered her hand to the bandage on her abdomen.
J.R. blankly stared at the food menus hanging on the wall behind the cash registers in the hospital cafeteria. His stomach was growling from lack of food, but nothing the cafeteria had to offer appealed to J.R.
J.R.'s mind wandered to the reason why he was at the hospital in the first place. His emotions had been stretched to their very limits, as he thought about what might have happened if Sue Ellen hadn't miscarried their baby…
Bobby glanced at J.R., as he saw a tear drop onto J.R.'s cheek.
J.R. angrily wiped the tear off of his cheek, and said, "I'm hungry, but nothin' sounds or smells very good, Bobby."
Bobby said, "I promised Sue Ellen that I'd make sure you got something to eat. You wouldn't want me to have to tell her I lied to her, now. Would you?"
J.R. gave Bobby an irritated glare, as he said, "Fine, I'll have the barbequed chicken platter, and since you're bein' such a pain in my ass, you can buy my lunch."
Bobby smirked at J.R. and ordered two barbequed chicken platters, and two medium sodas. Bobby paid for their lunches, and their drinks, and followed J.R. to a table next to the window in the cafeteria's dining room. J.R. sat down, and slouched against the back of the chair. He gazed out the window, and disinterestedly watched a discarded plastic bag lazily blowing around the parking in the warm, morning breeze.
Bobby took a sip of his soda, and said, "J.R., eat something, for Pete's sake."
J.R. turned his head away from the window, and glared at his younger brother.
J.R. grumpily barked, "All right. Damn it, you sure are a bossy cuss!"
Bobby laughed as he picked up a piece of chicken and lifted it to his mouth.
Bobby, licked his fingers, and said, "Mmm, J.R. Not bad for hospital food."
J.R. lifted a piece of chicken to his mouth, then smelled the chicken. The tangy, sweet smell of Texas barbeque filled his senses, and reminded him of the barbeques at Southfork. J.R. recalled the most recent barbeque they had at the ranch. J.R. remembered how beautiful Sue Ellen looked in her turquoise sundress, and how he and Sue Ellen left the festivities for a romantic retreat to their bedroom.
J.R. put the piece of chicken on his plate, and wiped the barbeque sauce off of his fingers.
J.R. pushed his plate away from him, and said, "Sorry, Bob. I just can't eat."
Bobby looked at J.R., as tears formed in J.R.'s eyes. J.R. turned his head away from Bobby's sympathetic gaze, and glanced out the window. J.R. pulled a handkerchief out of his pants pocket, and wiped at his eyes. J.R. sighed heavily, aggravated that he had let his emotions get the better of him.
Bobby said, "J.R. You're exhausted. Why don't you let me stay with Sue Ellen while you go back to the ranch and try to get some sleep?"
J.R. growled, "I'm not leavin' Sue Ellen, Bobby."
Bobby replied, "You won't be doing either one of you any good if you wind up in the hospital from exhaustion, J.R."
J.R. placed his hands on the window and leaned his head against the glass. J.R. silently wondered what he could have done, if anything, to prevent their loss. J.R. was frustrated by the emotional chasm he felt as he mourned for both him, and Sue Ellen. J.R. bitterly fought against his feelings of failure, for not being able to protect Sue Ellen and the baby.
If only he had known…
J.R. firmly resolved that the loss of their baby would make his relationship with Sue Ellen stronger. He knew how often relationships had been destroyed by the loss of a child, and it had taken him and Sue Ellen far too much time to find each other again, to let their loss come between them.
J.R. mumbled, "Thanks for your company, Bob," as he turned away from the window and left the cafeteria.
Dr. Aaron Chamberlain drew the curtains on the observation windows of Sue Ellen's hospital room so he could have privacy while he examined Sue Ellen's incision, and performed a post-operative pelvic exam. Dr. Chamberlain apologized in advance for any discomfort the pelvic exam might cause Sue Ellen, and playfully promised a healthy dose of whatever painkiller she wanted when he was finished with her exam.
Sue Ellen grabbed the railings on the side of her bed, and turned her head to one side, as Dr. Chamberlain sat on a chair at the foot of the bed, and put on a pair of rubber examination gloves. Sue Ellen flinched when she heard the 'snap' of the rubber material as Dr. Chamberlain donned the exam gloves.
Dr. Chamberlain said, "You're going to feel some pressure, Mrs. Ewing. I'm very sorry."
Sue Ellen whimpered, as Dr. Chamberlain continued examining her.
Dr. Chamberlain finished Sue Ellen's pelvic exam, and stood up from the chair. He lifted Sue Ellen's hospital gown, and carefully peeled back the bandages over her incision. The skin sutures were crusted with dried blood. Sue Ellen's entire lower abdomen was swollen, and discolored by a large purple and yellow-colored bruise that surrounded the incision.
Dr. Chamberlain applied a fresh dressing to Sue Ellen's incision, and placed her hospital gown over her legs, and covered her with the bed coverings.
Dr. Chamberlain tapped Sue Ellen on her shoulder, and said, "You're healing quite well, under the circumstances, Mrs. Ewing."
Sue Ellen smiled at the doctor, and said, "Please, call me Sue Ellen?"
Dr. Chamberlain said, "Very well, Mrs.…I mean, Sue Ellen. Do you have any questions about your recovery?"
Sue Ellen's face reddened as she asked, "When can we, I…no, we resume having…you know?"
Dr. Chamberlain laughed, and asked, "You mean sexual intercourse?"
Sue Ellen blushed, and said, "Yes, when can we resume having sex?"
Dr. Chamberlain said, "Am I to assume that you and your husband have a healthy sex life?"
Sue Ellen was flustered by the doctor's question, as she indignantly said, "Dr. Chamberlain, just because J.R. and I are older than you, doesn't mean we don't participate in that type of activity."
Dr. Chamberlain, smiled, and said, "That thought never entered my mind, Sue Ellen. I don't want to sound premature, but I would suggest waiting until after I've been able to give you a more thorough examination in about three to four weeks."
Sue Ellen nodded her head, confirming that she understood the doctor's suggestion.
Dr. Chamberlain told Sue Ellen that he would stop by her room later that afternoon, and see how she was feeling.
Sue Ellen smiled, and said, "Thank you, Dr. Chamberlain. I do have once more question, how is my…how is J.R. handlin' what happened?"
Dr. Chamberlain said, "I don't believe anyone has ever asked me how the Father deals with a miscarriage. Your husband is a very lucky man, Sue Ellen. Fathers are natural born protectors, and when something like this happens, they tend to blame themselves. You seem to be a very compassionate woman. That compassion will serve you both well as you and your husband heal emotionally."
Sue Ellen was pensive, as she considered what the doctor had told her about how J.R. might be feeling. Sue Ellen muttered 'goodbye' to Dr. Chamberlain as he opened the window curtain, before leaving her hospital room. Sue Ellen pulled her pillow into her lap, and leaned back against the mattress. Sue Ellen started to cry for her and J.R. as the thought of what J.R. must be going through hit home to her.
J.R. walked past Dr. Chamberlain on his way back to Sue Ellen's room. J.R. was oblivious to the doctor, as he walked with his head down, staring at the tiled floor. J.R. reached the thick, glass door of Sue Ellen's hospital room, and frowned when he saw Sue Ellen with her face buried in her pillow.
J.R. quickly went into the room, and said, "Sue Ellen?"
Sue Ellen lifted her head from her pillow and said, "Oh, God, J.R. I am so sorry."
J.R. was taken aback, as he asked, "What are you sorry for, Sugar?"
J.R. walked over to Sue Ellen's bed, and sat down by her side. He gently pulled her into his arms, as she trembled with emotion.
"I'm sorry for losin' our baby, J.R. I'm sorry that I've neglected to ask you how you're feelin'." Sue Ellen cried, as J.R. slowly rocked her back and forth in his arms, trying to calm her down.
J.R. lifted his head, and absently stared at the wall behind Sue Ellen's bed. His eyes burned from the bitter sting of his rapidly forming tears…