Author's Note: Well, I'm back.-smile- I've been having a really tough time lately... my health has been backsliding... it's really no fun a'tall. -sigh- But, anyways, I'll get over it—I always do...

I'm sorry about the faulty punctuation on the last chapter. -grimace- Somehow, Microsoft Word got messed up, and it turned all the em-dashes into en-dashes when I uploaded it to the site.-si-igh- I fixed it, though. Sorry to anyone who had to read it like that!

Now, on with the story!

-

Disclaimer: I do not own Alice 19th. A'tall. No matter how much I wish I did, I don't. Doesn't life suck?

-

Chapter VI: Calm Before the Storm

-

"Clementine...? Clementine! Wake up!"

"My neck... it... hurts... all of me hurts..."

"Wake up!"

Feeling someone shaking her, Clementine groaned and put a hand to her head.

"Clementine?"

"What's... um..." With another groan, she sat up and slowly blinked her eyes open. "...what happened...?"

Eric looked at her—worry showing in his eyes. "I don't know... are you alright?"

"I... everything's fuzzy..." Clementine frowned. She couldn't remember what happened, but there was this irreplaceable sense of dread rising in her heart.

"Are you sure?" Eric was staring at her piercingly. "If someone attacked you, I need to know."

"I don't think anyone attacked me... I..." Wincing, Clem grabbed the side of her neck. "Maybe... my neck hurts so badly... I probably fell on it..."

Standing, Eric held his hand out for her. "Come on. I don't think we should be training today. You need to be checked by a doctor."

Clementine nodded and hesitantly placed her hand in his. As soon as her hand touched his, the image of destruction she had seen at the window quickly flashed across her mind—not long enough for her to really remember, but long enough to make an impression. She gasped and hastily moved away from Eric.

"...Clementine? What is it?"

"Stay... just stay away from me!" Her eyes were wide, and she gathered her cloak closer around her shivering frame.

Eric looked alarmed. "Clementine... I don't know what's wrong, but... why don't you let me help?"

Clementine shrunk even farther away from him as he reached out a hand towards her. "No..." Tears sprang to her eyes. "Just stay away!"

Without a word, Eric stood and left the room. As soon as he had left, Clem buried her face in her frock and sobbed violently—her sobs shaking her whole body. She didn't remember what she had seen at the window, but it had left such a deep impression of dread that she could not merely shake it off.

After a few minutes, Frey walked into the room—looking quite worried. "Clem?" Eyes widening, he knelt down next to her. "...Clem, what happened? What's wrong?"

Clementine didn't respond; she threw her arms around his waist, gripping him tightly and sobbing into his cloak. "Frey..." She felt like she had to hold on to him and never let go, but she didn't know why.

"Clementine... you need to tell me what's wrong..." He placed his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her away so he could see her face.

She just stared at him—tears running down her face, and hazel eyes slightly glazed over. "Frey... I... I don't know..." Her voice became raspy and tear-filled. "I don't know what's wrong with me..."

Hesitantly, he reached up and wiped her tears away. Resting his hand on her cheek, he lifted her head and caused her to look at him. "Hey... why do you keep thinking that you have to deal with this on your own? I don't know what you're going through... but I can help. That's what I'm here for."

Clementine wanted to feel safe. She wanted to let Frey take care of her, and she wanted to be able to let go. She knew that she felt something for Frey—but while she generally felt warm and safe around him, she felt strangely cold and indifferent. Her tears stopped flowing, and she slid a little farther away from him. "Thank you, Frey—but I'm fine."

He blinked and stared at her for a moment. Her eyes had suddenly turned to stone, and he couldn't read her at all. This wasn't like her, and he knew it. "Clem, what happened to you? You're not yourself."

In a spurt of sarcasm, Clementine looked down at her hands. "I'm not? I sure seem like myself, don't you think?" After the words were out of her mouth, she winced at their sharpness. She didn't want to say that... she didn't even mean to say that... she just... did.

Frey wasn't used to being on the receiving end of her sharp sarcasm. He was slightly shocked at the way she was acting, and didn't quite know how to respond.

Ashamed of herself, Clem quickly stood. "I have to... go. Bye..." She took off—running out of the room as fast as she possibly could.

"Why... why am I acting like that? What happened? What's wrong with me! Frey tried to comfort me, and I treated him like dirt. I didn't want to... but why did I...? I felt... I felt like I had to hold on... yet I felt like I had to push him away..."

She rushed to her room and slammed the door behind her. Shivering, she leaned against the wall and sank to the floor. "...what am I doing here...?"

Her eyes were diverted to the floor. She didn't want to see... she didn't want to know. The shadows crept in every corner and niche of the room, but she didn't care. She felt at-one with the darkness, and it had no chilling effect as it would on those pure of heart. Those who dwell in the darkness eventually become part of it—there are no survivors. Darkness is in every heart; there are those who are not strong enough to fight it, yet are not courageous enough to accept it.

A pair of bright amber eyes peered out of the shadows. Clementine was slumped against the wall—pallid and seemingly lifeless. "Welcome to the darkness..." the voice hissed, not discouraged by the fact that its voice never reached Clementine's ears. "Welcome to despair."

The black letter began to glow on her neck. Her soul was slowly being eaten away, but she couldn't feel it. She was numb—her entire body would not feel. To her, the world wasn't real at that moment. There was nothing. There was no one. The world was emptiness incarnate, and life was pain. "There's nowhere to run—nothing to do. This is me... this is what I have become."

The figure smirked. "This is what you always were, my dear... and this is what you always will be..."

Her head sank further and her eyelids drooped. There is no clarity like that which is found between sleeping and waking—between consciousness and unconsciousness—between living and dying. There is no truth like that which is found in the Inner Heart. There is no pain like realizing that you are your own worst enemy. There is no hope.

Clementine dwindled in-between this state of semi-consciousness for a moment. Not long enough to be completely consumed by the Mara in her heart, but long enough for it to leave a lasting impression in her soul. She saw herself the way she really was—the way she had seen herself in the river. That was her.

Before she was able to completely give into her despair, someone entered the room and chanted the words "Na sadaru Lotis ran."

Clementine's eyes widened as there was a bright flash of light, and then she slumped over—unconscious.

The figure in the shadows snarled. "Fool..." With a look of extreme disgust, it melted back into the darkness.

-

Standing, Frey took a look around. "So... this is her Inner Heart..."

A large, green field surrounded him. No trees, water, or even flowers could be seen—just a vast field of grass. As he watched, the grass slowly began to wither—becoming brown and crunching under his feet. The sky was yellow, and there were no sounds of life anywhere. Whispers floated through the air and thunder started rolling overhead.

Frey's jaw involuntarily clenched. "Maram..."

He strained his ears to hear what the whispering voices were saying as he ran through the field of dead grass. The thunder drowned out their words of darkness, but—suddenly—one voice rang out above them all.

"I wanted him to die..."

Blinking, Frey whirled around. A large oak tree was visible in the middle of the field, and Clementine—who seemed a bit younger than she really was—was standing beneath it.

"Clementine!"

She turned to him—eyes flashing as her rage seemed to personify. "Get out."

"Clementine... listen to me... you have to snap out of this!"

Clementine laughed morbidly. "How can one quit being who they really are? No matter how much you try to deny it, there is darkness in every heart... and that darkness will never disappear."

"Listen to yourself! You've been at our branch! You've trained in the Lotis... you've seen—"

"I've seen what I've always known, Frey. I am of no use to you, or anyone else. I am me... and you don't want to know who I really am."

Frey didn't know what to say or do. He could see the pain in her eyes, and he knew that she was doing what she felt she had to. "Clem... what did you do...?"

Squeezing her eyes shut, she turned from him and bowed her head. "I can't tell you... just... leave now."

Frey never took no for an answer. "PAASA!"

Clementine's eyes widened, and she whirled around. Scenes of that night were playing out before their eyes... "No... NIRU!"

The scenes stopped—as did the thunderstorm. Clementine angrily approached Frey. "I told you to leave... and you insist on torturing me!"

"Clementine... please... you have to wake up...!" Frey knew that this "Clementine" wasn't really Clementine herself... this was the Mara in her heart manifesting itself in its own unique way.

"No... there is no 'waking up'... this is it!" She let out a dry laugh. "Now, get out... now!"

"Listen to me!"

"VINA!"

-

Wincing, Frey reeled back. He was back in the room, with Clementine across from him. She had a pained look on her face and a confused glaze in her eyes.

"...Frey...?" Her voice was a delicate, scared whisper. She hesitantly fixed her eyes on him. "...what did you see?"

He stared at her for a moment, then slowly shook his head. "...nothing... I saw nothing..."

Tears sprang to her eyes. "I-I'm so sorry... I don't know what came over me... I... I'm scared, Frey..." She choked out the words—almost as if it was killing her to admit it.

"Clementine..." He lifted her head and forced her eyes to meet his. "What are you afraid of?"

There was a long pause. Clementine diverted her eyes to the floor, then hesitantly met his again.

"Myself."

-

Clementine shivered as she lay in bed. She gathered the blankets closer around her. "Night is the worst part of the day..."

To her, night was day and day was night. All of time seemed swallowed in darkness. It had been two months since the incident in her Inner Heart, and—although she felt safer, not having to train with Eric anymore—her heart continually felt like it was sinking to her feet. There was an emptiness inside of her that she couldn't explain.

As the night wore on, she fought harder and harder to keep her eyelids from closing. She wouldn't let herself sleep. With sleep came the nightmares... the memories of what she had seen that day at the window. Yes, she remembered what she had seen, and she had to fight to forget.

Night was also the time when the thoughts of that night started to arise. She had tried so hard to forget what she had done... but, deep down, she knew that it was engraved in her memory for all eternity. Night was when the voices came.

"I wanted him to die..."

Outside, a pack of wolves began howling out the moon—causing Clementine to jump in fright. The moon cast an eerie glow on the walls of her room, and she slowly felt a sense of panic rising in her heart. It was times like these when she wished she could sleep in peace.

After a while, she couldn't bear being alone in the dark anymore. She slipped into her large robe and stepped out of her room. Walking down the hall, she finally reached Frey's room—where she stopped. She hesitantly reached for the doorknob—drawing her hand back a few times before she finally mustered up the courage to open it.

Frey was sitting at his window seat—staring out into the night. He turned when he heard Clem enter. "...Clem? Are you okay?"

"Yes... yes, I'm fine." She smiled weakly. "I... just... um..."

"The wolves getting to you?"

Biting her lip, then smiling, she nodded. "Yes... that's it... I just don't like to be alone at night... when I can't sleep... and there are noises..." Looking a little embarrassed, she added, "...kinda childish, huh?"

Frey chuckled and shook his head. "No—not at all." Patting the spot next to him, he motioned for her to sit.

Clementine slowly sat across from him on the window-seat. The window-seat was small, and their legs were forced to brush against each other every now-and-then. Thankfully, Frey wasn't in one of his "trying" moods, so Clementine could rest easy.

"Clementine..." Frey looked down as she turned to look at him. "It's not really the wolves, is it?"

Diverting her gaze to her hands, she shook her head. "No..."

"Then what is it?"

She paused—then she turned to look out the window. "I told you, Frey... two months ago... I'm afraid of myself. I'm afraid of my darkness... afraid of what I could do..." Her eyes started to tear up.

"Hey..." Frey reached out and took her hand. "Listen... as long as you don't give in to the darkness, there's always hope. The Lotis is stronger than the Maram—so no matter how difficult the situation, the light will always prevail."

"Frey... then why... why couldn't you defeat my darkness...?"

Placing a hand under her chin, he lifted her head so he could see her eyes. "I couldn't do it... because you're the only one who can defeat your darkness. You're the only one who can overcome your past. I can't do it for you..." He dropped his hand and looked down. "No matter how much I wish I could..."

A tear slipped down her cheek. "Frey..." Her voice started to crack. "...why...? Why do you care about me so much...?"

Looking up, Frey stared at her for a moment—contemplating what he was going to say. "Because... I..." He swallowed hard, then slowly leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Clementine's eyes widened—that was definitely not what she was expecting. He pulled away after a brief moment. "I think... that I love you..."

Clem was utterly speechless. "...Frey... I..."

Smiling a bit wryly—with a hint of nervousness masked beneath—Frey put a finger to her lips, silencing her. "Just... don't say anything, okay? You wouldn't want to ruin the moment, would you?"

Still speechless—but fully comforted—Clementine allowed herself to be enveloped in his warm embrace. "I... I wish I could stay like this... forever... but... what I saw at the window..."

It was hopeless... and she knew it. But she felt safe and warm... and she knew that she felt something for Frey, too. "If... if I'm going to be hurt... it can be later... right now, this is what I need... and... what Frey needs, too..."

She nestled her head in his shirt, and they both slowly drifted off to sleep—unaware and indifferent to the world around them.

Never sleeping, the darkness watched them in their bliss. "Enjoy this moment... it will be the last you spend together."

-

Author's Note: ... -grimace- Good. Gravy. That turned out nothing like I had planned for it to... -si-igh- That was just... weird.

Anyways, hope you enjoyed it... I enjoyed writing it, although... it wasn't what I was planning on. -koff- I was totally not planning on having any fluff in this... a'tall... but... oh well. -smile- As long as you guys like it, I'm happy! So... I hope you like it...-sweatdrop-

Review Responses:

Helbaworshipper: Thanks much-big smile- Hope you liked this chapter... kinda dark... yet... fluffy. -koff-

Esse: Hehe, thanks! Yeah... this chapter doesn't really have any comical relief... but... it got fluffy! Somehow... anyways, the dark symbol... hee, you shall find out in time. -wink- Haha, that wasn't really a quick update... but... okay! This one was quicker... it was really hard to write, though!

Tanlaith: Thank you! Well, you could always e-mail me—I'm always willing to help anyone with their stories! My e-mail address is on my profile—I think you just have to be signed in to see it. -smile- Oooh, you have to read the last volume! It's awesome!

Takame Kiriku: Hehe, yeah... poor Frey. I don't really think that Alice was right for him, though... I think she's better with Kyo. But you can't help feeling sorry for Frey! Hehe, I'm glad I'm giving you ideas! I love being able to help-grin-

Kingdom... Hearts... -twitch, twitch- Aaahhhh! I LOVE KINGDOM HEARTS! I love it, love it, love it! I'm practically... obsessed... -koff- Anyways, I reviewed one of your fics! I liked it a lot.

Arielle: Har, yeah, that would definitely be something... thanks much! Yeah... I never realized the whole "vulnerable thing" resemblance... funny how things work out like that. Hehe, "review soon?" I think you meant "update soon." -wink-