A Smile Worth More Than Gold Chapter 13: The Pain of Love, a card captor sakura fanfic

Hi! Well I guess you were mad because I left it as a cliffy, hehe sorry but hey it added to the suspense! And now for chapter 13!

Chapter 13- The Pain of Love

Syaoran read it over and over again, but nothing would make it go away. He hated it, he wanted to burn it, or pretend he never saw it, but the words were scarred into his mind, the words repeated over and over in his head. He fell to his knees and let the tears flow, no one was around to see them anyway so what did it matter?

"She's been lying to me…from the very beginning she was LYING to me!" He hit the ground with his fist. His teeth were gritted, his eyes were wide, it looked as though he had gone crazy. "All of it…" he said to himself, "All of it was a lie…All of it…" After venting out his frustration and finally realizing it wouldn't go away, he stood up and brushed himself off. He walked back to Eriol's and, when he arrived, walked right up to his room without a word to anybody. He locked his door and flopped onto his bed. He face was all he could see. He was wondering whether to keep the letter or to give it to Tomoyo, its rightful owner. 'What's going to happen now? What will I do? I can't just ignore her….or can I?' He thought long and hard about this, and before he knew it he was asleep.

Sakura felt into her back pocket to look for the letter she was going to give to Tomoyo. She was confused when she couldn't find it. "Where did it go….?" She was thinking for a while when it dawned on her. "I know I had it when I went outside with Syaoran…. Oh no……" The next day Sakura jumped out of bed and ran to Eriol's house. "ERIOL! LET ME IN!" She yelled as she banged on the door. Syaoran answered it, a dead look in his eyes that made Sakura's chest hurt. "Syaoran…did you…." She looked down at her feet, and something in his eyes changed. He went from emotionless to anger and pain. He glared at her.

"You mean the letter to Tomoyo?" Her head shot up suddenly to look at him. "You're a liar, you felt nothing for me. I don't want to hear you, see you, even utter your name, so I'd appreciate it if you left me alone." He slammed the door in her face, and Sakura stood there for a moment. She fell to the ground and put her face in her hands and cried. Tomoyo walked out slowly and shut the front door softly.

"Sakura..." She said, leaning down to where they were eye level. Sakura looked up; her eyes were red and shimmering because of her tears. Sakura hugged Tomoyo, and Tomoyo hugged her back.

"Tomoyo….. He read one of our letters…" Tomoyo's eyes widened and she hugged Sakura tighter. "He hates me now…." She started crying again, he head was hurting because she was crying so hard.

"Now now," Tomoyo said in a comforting voice. "I'm sure he doesn't hate you... we need to go somewhere were you can think this through, come on." She helped her friend up and they walked to the park. Sakura had calmed down and Tomoyo had bought them snow cones. "So what happened?" Sakura told her practically everything that had happened from when Sakura and Syaoran had gone outside up until what had happened that morning. "I see… so he knows now?"

Sakura nodded. "I told him when we first met not to try to figure me out," She laughed sadly, "But I suppose he figured me out without really trying…."

Syaoran was in just as much pain. Nothing was worse than this, and Eriol noticed the change that had occurred in his friend. "What's wrong? And why hasn't Saku-"

"Don't say that name; I don't wanna hear it…" Eriol's expression turned very serious.

"What happened?" Just as Sakura had told Tomoyo, Syaoran told Eriol exactly what had happened. "So…where's the letter?"

"I don't have it," he lied. He didn't want Eriol to see what Sakura had written.

Eriol simply sighed. "You're lying, just let me see it." They argued over the issue for a while until finally Syaoran was annoyed to the point to where he reached into his back pocket and shoved the letter into his face. Eriol read the letter and his eyes widened almost as much as Syaoran's had when he first read it. "Wow….So that's what's bugging you…" Syaoran nodded slowly, reverting his eyes back to the ground.

"I don't wanna think about her, I don't wanna talk about her, but she's in my mind constantly…" Syaoran looked around. "Where's Tomoyo?"

"She left with…uh…her…." Eriol was trying to avoid using Sakura's name.

"Of course she did, I should have known she would comfort her… I want….I want Sakura to feel….what I feel…. Eriol where do you think they would go?"

At this Eriol laughed. "Only one place…" He and Eriol left their house and headed for the park. Eriol had no idea of what Syaoran was planning, but if it would make him feel better, Eriol was willing to do it.

Sakura had calmed down; something about the park gave her a feeling of peace. That is, until she spotted Syaoran and Eriol… 'What are they doing here?' She thought. 'They don't know we're here,' Sakura got up quickly and grabbed Tomoyo's hand. She dragged Tomoyo with her into some nearby bushes. Syaoran was talking to a girl and Eriol had wandered off. Suddenly the girl laughed and Syaoran kissed her lips. The girl put her arms around his neck and he put his arms around her back and pulled her closer towards him. Sakura felt a pain in her chest, she clutched her shirt. 'What's going on!' she thought. Her pain was growing as she continued to watch. 'I can't take this much longer…'

Syaoran and the girl pulled away for air, and Syaoran smirked. He had his arm around the girl as they walked away. Sakura decided to follow them as Tomoyo went off to look for Eriol. Sakura ran from tree to tree, following them deeper into the park.

Sakura was hurting; her heart was aching more than ever. Something about this situation made Sakura hurt inside, and the deeper into the park they got, the more pain she felt.

Syaoran knew Sakura was following them, and he was somewhat happy. He wanted her to feel pain, he wanted her to be sad like him, he wanted her to feel what he felt, he wasn't sure if she felt the same way that he had once felt about her but if she was following him then she must care. He felt sorry for the girl he kept kissing, he felt nothing for her, but at the moment his only goal was to hurt Sakura, and hurting her he was, if only he knew.

Sakura was crying silently, she hated watching them, but she needed to know what was going on. She was trying hard not to cry out loud.

Syaoran and the girl laid down in the grass and she kissed his neck. He kissed her forehead and soon their lips were locked. Sakura cried harder, and she let out a whimper. At this Syaoran shoved the girl off. Something about her whimper, it made him burn inside, and he was ashamed for what he had done to her. He looked at his feet unhappily. Suddenly he felt no satisfaction towards his actions. He thought that when he gave her a taste of her own medicine he would be happy, but in reality he only felt worse. He felt like dirt, who would want to hurt Sakura?

He walked slowly towards her hiding spot and knelt down to look at her face. He went to put his arm around her, but she slapped his arm away. He tried over and over to hug her, but she slapped his arms away with every attempt he made. Finally he pulled her close to him, and she was lifeless. She was like a doll, she wouldn't make any movements, she had given up trying to keep him away from her. What was the point when he would just try again?

"Sakura I'm sorry…"

"Please don't touch me…get away…" her voice was soft ad hoarse. He wouldn't let go, and she got mad and pushed him away from her. She got up and ran off to her house. She locked the door then leaned against it. She slid down the door and cried. She was thankful that no one else was in the house to hear her.

Syaoran couldn't get the picture out of his head, the picture of Sakura's teary eyed face as she watched him and that girl. He didn't even like the girl, he didn't even know the girl, but she was flirting with him and that was all he needed. He felt bad about it, for both the girl and Sakura. He had used the girl and in doing so he had succeeded in hurting Sakura. He was ashamed of himself, and wanted to make amends with Sakura as quickly as he could. He ran to her house and pounded on the door.

"SAKURA! I'M SORRY! I didn't mean any of it! I was only mad! I'm sorry…. I'm sorry….." He stopped pounding on the door when he heard her voice.

"GO AWAY! I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU! Why? Why would you do that? Did you enjoy it?"

Syaoran became angry. "Did you enjoy lying to me! Did YOU enjoy hurting ME! I don't even know why I came to apologize to you!"

"Then LEAVE!" Syaoran turned around and walked to Eriol's house. Sakura cried harder than before as he left, and put her head on her knees and hurled herself into a ball. Syaoran arrived home and looked at Tomoyo and Eriol.

"Syaoran…are you…ok?" Tomoyo asked slowly.

He looked at her coldly. "You tell me." He reached into his back pocket and threw the letter at her. "Keep it, it belongs to you anyway." He went to his room and slammed the door.

Tomoyo opened the letter and read slowly:

Tomoyo,

Hey I really wanted to say that I'm happy you asked me to help Syaoran, though I have to admit I was kind of worried when I first saw him, but I did owe you. So I'm glad I took you're offer when you asked me to help him with his problems. I felt sorry for him when I first saw him, and I'm glad I was able to help him, so what I'm trying t o say is… Thanks Tomoyo, if you hadn't asked me to do this I never would have met Syaoran, Eriol or Nakuru. Love, Sakura

"No wonder he's so upset, he always said he didn't want pity friends. But what he doesn't understand is….." Tomoyo said to herself as she trailed off.

When Nakuru came home that night, she threw a party to try to get Syaoran's mind off of Sakura. This only saddened him and he wet outside to sit on the curb.

Nakuru followed quickly after, and sat beside him on the curb. She looked straight in front of her, not looking at Syaoran. "Listen kid," Syaoran knew she was serious. The only time she referred to him as "kid" was when it was important. "You and Sakura have something special. Unlike my relationship with Touya, the feelings are mutual between you two." Syaoran gasped and blushed as he looked at Nakuru, then looked back at the concrete. "All I'm saying is don't be a fool and throw it all away because of a letter, no matter how bad it was you can work it out. See ya Kid." She got up and went back inside of the house to go back to the party.

Syaoran, on the other hand, was running to Sakura's house, a newfound hope in his eyes. He was running as fast as he could, he couldn't wait to get to Sakura's house. But before he even reached it, there Sakura stood, under a street light. The light seemed to make her glow, and the look in her eyes made her practically irresistible. He stood there with a look of seriousness in his eyes as he and Sakura stared at each other. Sakura's eyes welled, he tears sparkling in the light and she ran to him. She jumped in his arms, making both of them fall to the ground. Sakura was on top of Syaoran, but neither of them cared.

"Syaoran I'm sorry I didn't tell you," She had her head buried in his chest and she was clutching his shirt, "But just because I started to befriend you cause Tomoyo asked me to doesn't mean anything past those first few moments were fake. Everything past that was real, you have to know that!" Syaoran put his arms around her.

"I'm sorry Sakura, I don't want to make you upset, I never should have done that, I don't even know that girl. She means nothing to me, when you on the other hand mean…uh…." He blushed, and was very relieved when Sakura interrupted him and started singing:

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word you can light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd
Old mr. webster could never define
What's being said between your heart and mine

As she finished her song, Syaoran held her closer as they laid on the ground, both of them silent as she nestled her head onto his neck. Both of the smiled in content. Syaoran put his hand on her chin and lifted her head up to brush his lips against hers. Both of them were blushing and Syaoran laughed. Sakura could feel the muscles in his stomach as he laughed, which made her laugh too, and soon their laughs echoed into the night, both of them happier than ever.