Well you guys, it's over. It's been a fun ride filled with guts and abuse, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. I have to warn that this chapter is the worse out of them all, it contains the whole shabang, adult situations, violent actions, swear words, everything, so don't read if you don't like!
The Sickness
Chapter 8
The Sole Survivor
"Boys will be boys, will be boys, will be boys, will be boys, will be boys, will beat boys, with no
warning.
Girls will be girls, will beat guys, will beat boys, that don't cry over toys, that they use to beat
girls they disguise, by the morning.
they always said that sex would change you...
No second thoughts the knife is nearing,
you'll never hear the little pitter patter, pitter patter,
of this little feat of engineering!"
- "Sex Changes" by The Dresden Dolls
"And I loved you unprotected,
but you only love in,
red!"
– "Colorblind" by The Dresden Dolls
The cool breeze picked up off the waves as the sun slowly set, spreading an eclectic variety of colors across the sky, blurring them together to celebrate the ending of another day. The waves rolled in, hitting the shore harshly, then foamed before disappearing back into the ocean once again. A storm was coming, she knew, she could feel the air tensing, compacting together. It was going to be a big one.
She had been sitting in the same spot all day, so long that the sand had formed around her bottom so when she finally stood for bathroom breaks, that were coming more frequently now, there would be an imprint for her to return to.
The only thing she'd done all day long, was allow the ocean to lap at her feet, until the waves started growing in power when the temperature dropped. Sawyer wouldn't let her do anything else, and she had to commend him for it, he was true to his word, keeping an eye on her even when he was out tracking boar, or cutting firewood, or retrieving water from the depths of the jungle.
But having restricted perimeters of only the beach, life was becoming more then boring. He'd offered her any of the books he'd come across, but she was never much of a reader, unless she was reading directions.
So for most of the day she sat by the waves, staring into the horizon like she always had, the little blue line between the sky and the ocean never ceasing to entertain her, and she contemplated what she was going to do in the up coming months, until that even became a bore to her.
Her last resort was talking to herself, or rather the life growing inside of her. It had been six weeks since Shannon and Aaron had died, other then Sawyer there was no one else to talk to unless the voices she heard whispering in the jungle counted.
She sighed, as the dark plum color of night seemed to usurp the sky, shooing all the other colors until they retaliated at the sunrise. Glancing backwards, she scanned the jungle in the dying light, waiting impatiently for Sawyer to emerge, he'd been out all day hunting. She hadn't seen hide nor hair of him since yesterday night. If he didn't return soon, she'd have to light her own fire, which meant being chided upon his return; he'd told her that the smoke was bad for the baby.
The waterlogged book she'd taken from Sawyer's tent in a moment of excruciating boredom sat beside her, but night had claimed the sky and reading was now impossible and useless.
Moving her hand to her stomach swollen with the four and a half months she thought she was pregnant, she closed her eyes, knowing how foolish she must look, though no one was around but the prying eyes of the jungle.
"He's taking a long time today," she told her stomach as she gave it a small rub, "Maybe he finally outsmarted those boars," she suggested, then quickly came up with an alternative answer, "Either that or they've finally captured him. Which is probably the more plausible answer. He really doesn't know crap about hunting," she paused stretching out her back, "But he has a good heart."
She stopped talking, almost waiting for the baby to give a response, "He's falling out of routine, the one he says is the stability to surviving. I swear he'd schedule when I go to the bathroom if he could, he's going to get a mouth full when he gets back," she warned as her hand traced circles on her stomach.
"Jesus Freckles, can't you at least wait until the damn thing comes out before you start bad mouthing me?" he huffed as he limped weakly into the camp.
"Sawyer," she nearly shouted as she pushed herself quickly from her indented spot and rushed over to him, "What the hell happened to you?" she asked as she slipped his arm around her shoulders and began to hobble him towards the medical tent.
"The damn boars snuck up on me, that's what happened," he told her as she helped him to sit down on the beaten cushions.
She turned away to grab medical supplies and her surpressed laughter escaped in a tiny gasp, "It ain't funny Freckles," he explained, "I found one of those little bastards caught in the vines. I was gonna get him, but then," he sighed and pointed to her stomach as she knelt down before him, "I thought of the runt and I couldn't do it," he explained.
Her face grew into a smile at the thought of him thinking of the baby. She turned on the lantern that Sawyer warned her only to use of emergencies, he wanted there to be enough juice in it in case she delivered the baby at night. A bruise had formed over his left cheek and his lip had been split down the middle.
"So how'd you get the battle scars?" she asked as she reached for the peroxide and wetted a rag with it, "Fall down a hill on a good Samaritan run?" she added with a chuckle as she touched the rag to hip lip.
"Ah, Goddamn, would you stop it," he told her as he batted her caring hands away from him, "I was gonna say after I let the bastard out, his Momma came charging at me like a maniac. Tackled me down a damn hill."
Kate chuckled as she sat back, "Now why the hell is that funny?" he asked angrily.
"You got beaten up by a boar, again," she chuckled, "I told you I should do the hunting."
"Yeah Mighty Huntress of the Jungle and Baby Cheetah," he stated sarcastically, "You couldn't run if you wanted too, all you do is waddle," he reminded as he poked her stomach, "Too much weight on one side."
She grinned and grabbed his hand before he could poke her again, "At least the boars are on my side," she reminded with an arrogant tone.
"I wouldn't be surprised if you talk to the damn things," he repeated with a chuckle, as he leaned back and watched her roll her eyes as returned all the medical supplies to their rightful spots. "You talk to everything else, gonna start to call you Pocahontas if you don't stop."
A dry laugh escaped her mouth as she sat beside him, "You've been reading to many of those stupid books," she informed as he sat up meeting her eyes, "I don't get how you can…"
He leaned over quickly and captured her lips, kissing her gently for a second or two and pulled away. Her eyes were wide with bewilderment, and she looked at him for an explanation, "You talk to damn much," he told her with a smug beam.
Moving in closer with a smile pasted on her face, he wrapped his arms around her back as she slid onto his lap. Tilting her head up, she kissed him as his hands skimmed down her side and her arms hooked around his neck.
Slowly his hand floated over her hip and she let out a small giggle, he pulled his lips away from her and smiled mischievously, "You ticklish, Freckles?"
"Maybe," she replied with an innocent face as he bent down to kiss her again, but pulled away after a few seconds, "You eat yet?" he asked her suddenly.
"And this came up why?" she asked still looked up at him.
"Nope," he told her, shaking his head as he helped her sit up, "No fun until you eat darlin'," he informed as he stood up, "Gotta make sure Junior's happy before you get all giddy."
"I never thought this day would come," she rolled her eyes, "Sawyer's showing sexual restraint," she added as he offered her a hand to help her stand.
"Gotta take care of my baby," he clarified as he sent her a warm smile, one she hardly ever say grace his face. His words dancing in her heart.
"I think that boar knocked something loose in your head," she disclosed.
She yawned as the sun's rays hit the blue tarp used as a siding, causing the contents of the tent to take on a blue tinge. Her eyes slid indolently open as she slowly began to wake up. Sitting up, she pulled her head off of Sawyer's chest and shook it, the man could sleep through an atomic bomb being set off by a brigade of jackhammers.
Arching her back she stretched it out, sleeping was a task that had become more then uncomfortable in the last few weeks, every time she was so fatigued she needed to sleep, she couldn't find a good spot, except for last night. It was completely harmless, both nonverbally agreeing to take it slow, but still it didn't mean that it wasn't enjoyable.
She stood up and stretched her hands over her head, then brought one down and rested on her stomach, "We're very hungry today," she announced as she stepped out of the tent and into the sunlight.
It was a beautiful day and the impending storm seemed to have passed over the island quickly. It made her feel all that better and believe that maybe, they really could make it past everything negative about the island and start anew. She finally felt that she was over…
"Kate," a hoarse voice called her and her feet froze as if the sand had become super glue. She'd recognize it anywhere, and it wasn't Sawyer's.
She turned around slowly; her breath jagged and looked upon the man that called her. He stood about three yards away and looked nothing like she'd remembered him; his warm eyes were tarnished by scrapes and sleepless nights. His loving smile was covered in an unattended beard. His clothes were ripped and tattered, covering in dark brown bloodstains and some fresh bright red splotches.
"No," Kate shook her head, "Jack get out of here," she told him.
"Kate, you," he stared at her stomach, "Its…You've been busy."
She covered her stomach with her arms, "Yeah," she replied breathlessly as she watched him like a hawk, ready to react if he made any rash moves.
"Is it…" he stuttered nervously.
"Yeah, it's yours," she informed, not sure if it was the right thing to do, but he had a right to know, and maybe the thought of her carrying Sawyer's child would send him into a violent rage.
"From the caves?" he questioned gesturing in the general direction of the caves.
"Yeah," she answered quickly, maybe if she told him what he wanted to know, he'd leave quickly.
"I'm sorry," he apologized with a weak smile on his face as his eyes still stared at her stomach.
She nodded, "Jack, why are you here?" she asked with a tremble to her words, almost afraid to hear the answer.
"You've got to kill me," he told her, bluntly as he took a step forward. She immediately took a step back to compensate.
"What?" she shouted, hoping to wake Sawyer,. But had no such luck, "I can't," she shook her head. Seeing him again, all the old emotions were flooding back through her, the joy she had once of being recognized by him, and cared for, and worried about, "I still love you," she whispered into the wind.
"I love you too," he informed taking a step forward, she didn't move back, but she still kept a close eye on him. "Which is why you have to do this," he told her, "If you don't I'm going to come back here and do something horrible, I can feel it Kate."
"But you haven't in a while," she replied not comforting either of them.
"Kate, this blood is Locke's," he told her, "I killed him, I stabbed him, I beat him, I laughed while I did it. Please, you've got to," he told her hurriedly as he pulled out a gun, "I don't want to hurt anyone else."
"I can't!" she told him still refusing even consider the thought. She'd killed the man she loved before; she'd never do it again.
"Why are you making this harder then it has to be?" he growled angrily. Kate instantly took a step back, "Just take the fucking gun and do it already!" He yelled waving the gun around like a maniac.
"Jack, stop!" she yelled as her arms wrapped tighter around her body, "just go away, if Sawyer finds you…"
"What?" he questioned. His voice was calm, but too calm, it sent chills up Kate's spine, "So that's it huh? You just go around fucking every guy on the island? Is that it Kate?" he questioned as he stalked towards her, so angry his feet seemed to sizzle in the sand, like the butts of Sawyer's cigarettes as he snuffed them out.
"Sawyer!" she yelled as she attempted to run, but he'd been right, she couldn't outrun a snail, never the less Jack, the disease acting almost like a steroid.
He jumped forward, tackling to the ground. She landed hard on her stomach, the impact knocking the air out of her. In the few moments it took her to catch her breath, he was already up, "You stupid," he kicked her hard, his boot coming in contact with her chest, "Lying," he kicked her again, his blows growing harder, she removed her hands from her head and placed them around her stomach. "Loose," Again. This one landing on her ribs, breaking two upon impact, "Bitch!" His rage hit an extreme as he hit her hard, directly in the stomach.
"Jack," she gasped painfully, "Stop," she pleaded, her body bruised and bleeding, "Don't hurt the baby."
He stood idle for a second, his eye twitched, "Kate," he told her, his hands shaking, tears streaming down his face, "Kill me, for Godsake, kill me!" he yelled to her.
She stared at him, her body weak, "Sawyer," she mumbled, in an attempt to wake him.
With that one word, Jack turned back into the monster he'd become. "I'll kill you," he roared as his jaw set angrily, he grabbed the gun from the waistband of his jeans and hit her across the face with it. She could barely feel it, her eyes rolled back in her head as it hit the ground, "Don't hurt the baby Jack," she begged.
"I'm not having Sawyer raise my fucking kid!" he yelled as he threw the gun to the ground and kicked her in the stomach repeatedly, his blows landing in the exact same spot, his knowledge as a doctor knowing where to kick.
Kate cried as she tried her best to protect her unborn child, but the first kick broke her hand, and after three more her body had gone limp as consciousness faded away from her. There was so much blood around her, she couldn't even tell where it was coming from anymore.
"You son of a bitch!" Sawyer yelled as he barreled towards Jack, knocking him down and away from Kate, and into the pool of her blood. "I'll kill you!" he yelled as he punched Jack in the face.
Jack kicked Sawyer off of him and threw his fist threw the air. It came in hard contact with sawyer's jaw and a groan of pain escaped his mouth as he fell back. Jack saw the advantage and began to beat Sawyer harder then he had with Kate, not holding back his rage towards the man.
Kate's eyes opened painfully, her dry lips pursed together as she tried to blink away the pain, but it didn't work. She turned her head slowly to her left and saw only the sand, stained red from all the blood that had left her body. It was moist and stuck to her skin and her clothes as she pushed herself up, holding her head and steadying herself before looking over to the scuffle.
Her entire body ached; breathing was hard, almost uncontrollable. She placed a hand on her stomach cautiously, but winced and withdrew, it hurt to touch and she could begin to feel her insides cramping.
"Jack leave him alone!" She yelled as she looked up, tears in her eyes. If she didn't stop him, he would surely beat Sawyer to death; he could barely retaliate as it was.
He looked back at her, his eyes crazed and filled with hatred and with a violent shove, pushed himself away from Sawyer and began stalking over to her. Apparently furious he hadn't finished the job.
She quickly realized that she was weaker then Sawyer and had no way of defending herself against Jack, until something glimmering in the sand caught her eye. The gun Jack had dropped sat glistening. Being buried by the strong storm winds that were blowing in once again.
She reached for it speedily and aimed it at Jack, her hand twitched and the gun shook; she couldn't hold it even, her nerves and pain tainting her with failure. It was hard firing a gun with only one hand. She couldn't do it, no matter how much of a monster he was; she couldn't force herself to shoot him. And as he stalked closer she realized she was going to die.
Another agonizing cramp ripped through her, and she understood what had happened. Her eyebrows furrowed and her teeth clenched, she was becoming angry, she knew what he had done. She could take being beaten, or killed, but when an innocent child, their innocent child fell victim, she wouldn't stand by and take it lightly.
Her fingers squeezed around the trigger and within a few seconds, a brigade of bullets fired through the air. The glass shattering sound echoing through the solitary island, drowning out the dull sound of the waves. All six bullets fired found their way into Jack at one mark or another, sending his body crumpling to the ground with crimson blood trickling out of the wounds.
Her hands shook, "No," she muttered, panic stricken by her actions, she'd done it again, just like with Thomas, though this time it'd been intentional. She looked into his hazel eyes, watched as the bullets shot through him; she felt relief when he hit the sand.
Without contemplation she raised the barrel of the gun to her head, and took a deep inhalation.
"Kate, don't!" Sawyer called out from where he had regained himself. He looked almost as bad as she did, his face and arms bruised, blood leaking out of him at some parts.
She shook her head, "I'm sorry Sawyer," she told him and moved to pull the trigger.
He took off from the sand and tackled her backwards into the puddle of her own blood. The gun went off, but the bullet hit nothing but air as it flew up into the sky. Moving off of her, seeing her still breathing he felt great relief. Then he remembered what she was trying to do, and almost had to sit on his hands to prevent him from doing something awful, "The hell are you doing?" he asked her as he pulled her up. She flopped back weakly, her body like a ragdoll.
"I don't want to be here anymore, Sawyer!" she yelled angrily as her good hand moved up and brushed her tears away, spreading blood across her cheeks while doing so
"Think about the baby, Freckles," he told her as his hand came up to her cheek trying to calm her.
"There is no more baby," she sobbed as she fell onto him. He looked at her for a moment, terrified and confused, "Jack kicked it out of me," she whispered.
"Kate," he whispered gently, tears stinging his own eyes are he smoothed her hair back. He tried to continue but realized he had nothing to say.
"Whatever's left of it is in the sand, or will be soon enough," she added, a disgusted tone hidden in her words. She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his chest as she sobbed.
He did all he could, sliding his arms around her waist tenderly; he lay his head against her shoulder and began to cry as well.
Sawyer let out a sigh as he began digging a hole, using shovels that had been a breakpoint in the engineering on the island. He remembered when Michael had finished building one, calling it a prototype, people had actually cheered, elated to have some kind of object that could remind them of home.
He shook his head, his jaw set in anger, Mike probably didn't know how well he'd built it. Sawyer had used it so often that he could actually tell where he always gripped it, the wood was beginning to wear.
He stopped digging for a moment and used the back of his hand to wipe the sweat from his forehead. He hated doing this, he didn't know what he'd give to have Jack come waltzing through the patches of trees and ask him what the hell he thought he was doing. Or to hear that damn dog bark up a storm while Shannon screamed at it to shut the hell up. Or to tell Kate that the way her lowriders clung to her body, he could see more then he dreamed of, waiting for her to roll off his comment.
But none of that was going to happen, Jack had been shot so many times by Kate, he swore a damn firing squad was behind her for a moment. He's buried him min the jungle with the rest of the crew, leaving only the solitary graves of Shannon and Sayid on the beach, feeling it was a nice gesture to let their bodies rest together in private forever.
The grave he dug now was finished, he didn't need to double-check it, he knew that it would be the right size. He huffed angrily as he sent a sideways glance at the corpse he was burying, she still looked alive, like she was sleeping peacefully or something. He wanted to wait at least an hour before burying her, thinking that her body was going to come back to life, but he had to get rid of it.
Every time he looked into Kate's empty green-gray eyes, his heart broke and he wanted to cry. A few days after she shot Jack, she was plagued with a never-ending guilt, guilt for killing Jack, for loosing the baby, for failing.
After her miscarriage was complete, the undeveloped fetus was buried. She refused to attend the burial, Sawyer had to drag her up there himself, carrying her most of the way. He knew she needed to say goodbye, but he also feared of her finding the gun he'd hid so well and taking her own life. Which was what ended up happening anyways.
He'd stayed up three days in a row, watching her while she slept, not grabbing a wink himself, knowing that as soon as he did, she'd be up and out of the tent, looking for a way to end it. But on the forth day, his body got the best of him and he woke up just in time to see her blow her brains all over the sand.
Placing her limp body in the grave, he made sure her eyes were closed. His fingers twitched remembering the way she stared at nothing when he ran over to her, the silent drip of blood falling into the sand seemed to boom.
Closing his eyes he began to cover her, pushing the dirt to cover her body. He couldn't watch, he'd be sick, knowing that her beautiful face was going to remain six feet under for the rest of eternity.
He patted the dirt down, making sure it was even and shoved one of the rocks in as a tombstone. Crosses had long since been dismissed for that purpose since there was know way of knowing who was buried where.
He had scratched her name in previously and added 'Freckles' to the bottom. Making sure she was placed between Jack and her baby.
As a final touch he placed on white flower on top of her grace and stared at it as he waited for his tears to stop. But they wouldn't, and they hadn't since he'd found her fifteen minutes ago. He tried to suck it up, be a man, but not when he knew she was dead. He'd never hear her voice, touch her skin, or kiss her lips ever again.
"You are the last one then?" a voice asked from behind him. His tears seemed to dry instantly as he turned around to see Danielle watching him from the path that lead to the beach.
"Guess it's just you and me Frenchie," he said sarcastically as he threw the shovel to the side.
"It was best the child was killed before birth," she informed bluntly.
Sawyer's head shot up and his face almost turned red, "What the hell you say?" he growled, almost daring her to repeat her words.
"The others were going to come, to take the child as soon as it was born, they always do with girls," she announced. Before Sawyer could even ask she added, "They can always tell, which is why Claire was released."
"Whatever," Sawyer mumbled as he walked past her and back to the beach, trying to keep the tears out of his eyes as he thought of himself, Kate and the little girl who called him "Daddy."
"You should make a shelter in the jungle, underground. It's safer, and easier to attain the things necessary for survival," she disclosed as she followed him, a few feet behind him.
"So I make a shelter next to yours and we become neighbors, big whop, what are we going to do then?" he questioned, not fond with the idea of hanging out with a French lady who'd been alone for sixteen years.
"We wait for it to happen again," she announced pointing to the sky. The drone of a plane barely keeping airborne could be heard off in the distance, over the low roar of thunder. The storm Kate had predicted had finally come.
And there you go. Dark but not nearly as dark as my "Stand" fic, that sadly will never be released (In fear of being stoned and then captured by a mob of villagers with torches and locked away in an asylum).
Whirlwind-2005
Nah I had this ending in mind since before I even wrote the story. I just thought, what would I never do in a million years? And then I did it.
I had an alternate ending, where Kate does have the baby and then Sawyer dies a few months later and she dies because the others want her and her baby goes to Danielle, but I scraped it because I liked this one a whole lot more.
October Sky
Sorry but all great things must come to an end. Sad I know, but now the next project can be worked on!
CrAzYhOrSeGiRl88
NOOOOOOO, I wanted some hatemail! Tear! Anyways don't fall back into that Sawyer/Kate thing or I'll hurt you I will. Well no I won't but I'll never ever ever ever ever write another story if you do! So there! PS Everyone seems to like Detour, better tell me what I've gotta write about (BE A DISCO! I WANNA WRITE ABOUT A DISCO!)
Orlando-Crazy
Thank you
Lostobsessivefreak
Hope you enjoyed the ending and my overuse of the word 'blood', and thanks for the nice comments!
FanOfLost
First of, you can't hate me, I hate you! (Totally kidding of course)
Next thing is you can't hate this story because this story hates you (hence the Sawyer/Kate ness (Hate the term Skater)
Lastly, It was so damn hard for me to write that I was like sick for 3 days. I was in such a bad mood that To'ed my mom because she never knew what was wrong.
And I felt that Sawyer spending an eternity on and island alone with Frenchie De La Crazie would be worse then dying. Quel est ton damage (totally screwed that up but I don't have french for awhile so there!)
Next Story- Is fluffy like no other with a bit of angst, the kind you all like (Save for Manda who is like me and would rather have a bloodbath) but I'm tres excited (notice the interlanguage wording) about writing it. So excited. And hopefully it'll be up soon (Totally Jack and Kate pair) and if you love 'Another', you'll love this!
Is fluffy like no other with a bit of angst, the kind you all like (Save for Manda who is like me and would rather have a bloodbath) but I'm tres excited (notice the interlanguage wording) about writing it. So excited. And hopefully it'll be up soon (Totally Jack and Kate pair) and if you love 'Another', you'll love this!