Well I lost it to day. First my 'friend' kept calling me stupid and I have been hearing this for over four years. She kept saying it over and over. Then I went into an emotional melt down. Now I'm wearing black. Black shirt black pants. My pen marks in my notebook look like stab marks and they are red do it look like blood. The only light in my room is the light of this laptop. For a while I pretended every thing was fine. I skated around my attic listening to American Idiot and singing along with it. I can dance on my skates. It drove my family crazy and scared them. LOL. So I'm trying to fight the feeling to cut myself. My hands are shaking; it's gotten that bad. GOD I HATE HER!!! I WANT HER TO BUTN IN HELL!! Sorry but you don't know her.

Hiei POV-

I slumped to the ground and took in a few breaths. I got up and staggered back to the temple. No matter how much I wanted to stop I kept on going. I started to feel light headed. My world spun around me. It hurt. I'll admit it. Nut I would never let them know. I kept going. My vision started to blur. I was at the steps of the temple. I fell to my knees still holding my arm. I didn't have the energy to get up. I closed my eyes and fell into a deep sleep.

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That's all I'm writing for now…

just kidding! There's more.

(Kitty- black shirt that says If people say I have a brain then why cant I see it? Written in blue, and black baggy pants. Wavy red hair with light blue and dark blue streaks)

Hiei POV some time later-

God my head hurt. I slowly opened my eyes. The light was blinding. I squinted trying to block it. "It's about time you got up," I heard Yusuke say. I tried to get up.

"Don't get up too fast," Kurama said smiling. I frowned. "What the hell happened?" I asked looking around at my surroundings.

"We found you on the steps," Kuwabara said. "You were bleeding pretty badly."

-Flashback-

"Have you seen Hiei?" Kurama asked. The rest looked at each other. They were just coming home from school.

"No," Kuwabara said, "No wonder I have been so happy." Kitty stuck out her foot and tripped him. "What was that for?" he said while Yusuke and Kurama helped him up.

"For being you," She said still walking ahead not looking back at him. They were almost to the steps to the temple.

"Hey who's that," Yusuke said pointing to something lying on the steps. They run over to check.

"Oh my God! It's Hiei!" Kitty screamed changing her steady running pace to a sprint. With Yusuke, Kurama, and Kuwabara running close behind her. She fell to her knees beside him on the verge of tears. Kurama knelt by her. He examined Hiei. He was still breathing. 'At least for now,' he thought. He picked him up and carried him back into the temple with the others close behind him.

-End flashback-

Hiei POV the next day writing-

You want to know why this happened

You look at me

Watching me bleed

I look at you

And you look back

You think I did this

This suicidal deed

But I'm not the one holding the knife

You are

The blood on your hands

You don't recognize

You don't know what to do

So you watch

Watch yourself kill me

The pain hurts too much

But you don't realize

That you are making me die

Maybe I want to

Maybe I don't

I know the ending to this

You will never stop

I will bleed always

I don't know why you hate me

Now I'm cold

And I hate everyone

And everything

Especially my reflection

The scars I wear

Will never fade

My tears of blood

Are here to stay

You forced them here

You're never sorry

You never cared

That's why I'm no longer here

Now that I'm gone

You have no one to hurt

Now that I'm dead

You shed tears

Because I am no longer here

I feel no pain

I feel no sorrow

I can't feel anything

I'm still here with you

But I'm dead

Dead in my mind

Dead in my soul

Numb forever

But you still go on

Go on and ill me

I know you will never stop

And that is how it will end

Well that's all I can write now. That poem was called you're Never Sorry. I just wrote that when I was mad at that person. I don't hate everyone and everything. I hate many people and many things. I like some people and things. Now my self-asteam is back to a negative 15. I'll be ok though so don't worry. I'll try to get over it. And my other friend just noticed some things about me. That my hair is usually in my face, that I always wear black boots everyday, I wear dark clothes when wear don't have to wear uniforms AND AT HOME, that I walk in the shadows or with my head down, and that I never make eye contact with anyone. It's been going on for four years it's about time she noticed. Not that I care. Well that's all. Back to my darkness. Bye.