Let's begin the awful version of Attack on Rue Plumet!
Frodo:
Gandalf, what was he thinking
Why's he leaving me a ring?
Gandalf:
This ring, you're going to carry it
To Rivendell, place of Elves
You should know that it's the one
That use to be on Sauron's finger
It has red markings when heated
(throws in fire to prove his point)
Perhaps Middle Earth's fate is here!
Frodo:
Oh Boy, somebody help me!
Gandalf, what'll I do?
(Hah! I've gotten rid of yet another religious preference)
I'll have to travel across the land
You know, I'm really confused
What'll I do, when do I leave?
I've got to carry the ring
I've got to get away
Gandalf:
This is
Me: Oh, you know what? Just skip this part, 'kay, Gandalf? For those who are reading this, just hum that bit in your head. Start at 'Ten years ago'.
Slightly Disgruntled Gandalf:
Wait here Frodo
I hear something in the bushes
Maybe an eavesdropper
I've got my staff, so I'm armed!
(vague pointing)
You should go over there
(Then throws your dear Gamgee across the table. Yes, he's yours. I don't want him.)
Sam:
Honest, sir, I wasn't
Dropping no eaves!
I'm clippin hedges
I'm doing my job!
Gandalf:
You shut your mouth
Go with Mr. Frodo
(And the mysteriously acquired Bill)
(Time Passes)
Pippin:
What have we here?
Merry:
Who are these hobbits?
Frodo:
It's the prat we call Sam
(Okay, sorry, that's me talking)
Don't you know that I'm Frodo
Why's Farmer Maggot chasing you?
Pippin:
Hold these(Gives Sam crops) Merry, we should run
Let us all run over here
It's a hill! Oh, MUSHROOMS!
Time Passes
Frodo:
I know this place, I tell you
There's nothing here to fear
Just the old man and the inn
We should see Gandalf here
Aragorn:
Hey, Underhill!
(pulls into room)
You've got some trinket
Take care, young hobbit
We really shouldn't stay
Sam:
I'll have you longshanks!
Door Guard... Guy:
Who's there?
(Gets smushed by horses and doors)
Aragorn:
Let's go, RINGWRAITHS!
We'll run to Weathertop
Time Passes
Frodo:
Put out the fire! You FOOLS!
Ringwraiths:
Screech
No one talks/sings right now
Hobbits are in a little circle
Aragorn is... not here yet
(Frodo screams)
(Maybe I should say- After he's been stabbed, he screams)
Aragorn:
You wait Frodo, you'll be alright
-Too busy swirling torches at wraiths to sing-
Sam do you know Athelas, Kingsfoil? It's a weed
Go through the forests, it may slow the poisoning
Arwen:
What's this? A ranger caught off guard?
Once more, Arwen saving the day
Dearest Aragorn- I will take Frodo
Bring him to me, I know the way
Ringwraiths are near
My horse is fast
To Rivendell!
Aragorn:
Elendil, Arwen!
Ride fast, don't look back
Sam:
Don't you know the wraiths are still out there?
(For those wondering- That should have been Aragorn's line song wise)
Arwen:
Nin o Chithaeglir, lasto beth daer,
Rimmo nin Bruinen dan in Ulair!
Frodo, come back to me and hear my voice
Frodo:
Uurrghh
A/N: Sorry, I stretched how many scenes into one song? Ah, and I even ended the song early. Aiya, I'm reading over this... some parts are seriously skrewed, this entire chapter is a bit... Just bear with me a bit, alright? Next chapter will be better. I hope. -damn hobbits...- I'd stop the story because of the chapter, but I really want to get to Fantine's death.