A/N: This is the first half (one-third, really) of what was supposed to be a big climactic chapter (the outline alone was like 4 pages). Ugh, am totally butchering the pacing and momentum by posting only first part now, but oh well. If you don't want it butchered, don't read this chapter until next one comes out (ETA: 2 weeks). Am posting first part now because I always hated when authors left me hanging for weeks and weeks. Hopefully this will tide you over, those of you still following this fic. Thanks!

Atropos' Knife: yes, that was exactly the irony I was aiming for. Glad you saw it. There's supposed to be a fair amount of dramatic irony, but I'm never sure if people pick up on it, but at the same time, it's no good if I bash the reader over the head with it. Will continue working on it.

bc: The second half was all from Makubex's POV.

Zining: Thanks for the review. Have fixed the chapter now, and the typo.

Rabid Lola: Yeah, I get what you're saying because that was exactly what I was trying to say with that section. However, Makubex is a little younger in this fic (see LJ post for character ages). Actually, all my characters sound way too old. Ginji definitely doesn't sound 15. Oops.

Magicalfoci: Yes, Ginji is very interesting. I'm a little obsessed with him, if you can't tell. ; )

Disclaimer: Sigh. Still don't own GetBackers. I'd settle for just owning Ginji, but nope, no such luck.

The Past is the Present

"Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all convictions, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity."

--from "The Second Coming," W.B. Yeats

"…one."

It was eternity in a split second. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion even though they all moved at once. Kazuki reached for his threads, Juubei for his needles. Ginji, eyes narrowed like an eagle's, the king of all birds of prey, raised his hand and aimed for the heart. Makubex gritted his teeth. Kouji crouched, bracing himself, waiting for the—

BOOM. It came. All hell broke loose.

Ginji completed the circuit, and a bolt of lightning shot from his hand, aimed straight at Kouji and Makubex. Kouji, having anticipated the move from Makubex's sudden quietness, jumped out of the way just in time, but Makubex, hands bound before him, held in place by Kouji's massive hands until the half-moment before, had no chance to react. The lightning struck him full force in the chest, slammed his small body back with the force of nature's most destructive power. He didn't even cry out, couldn't even gasp as he took the hit, as he was flung off his feet—all the wind was knocked out of him by the blow. His muscles jerked and released, and oh, it burned. Everything burned bright white and his vision was all white, until, falling down, down, his body limp as a dying leaf fallen from a tree, he gave himself over to the darkness and the oblivion.

"MAKUBEX!"

Kazuki flew into action and shot out string upon string, a white silken net to catch a falling king. Makubex's body never had the chance to hit the ground. With an expert tug, Kazuki swung his net and the boy over to the side, out of the path of the Raitei and Kouji, and brought the boy to rest in the shelter of a ruined wall. He and Juubei rushed over, and Kazuki undid his strings immediately, almost frantically. Juubei cleared a spot in the rubble, laid the boy down gently, and began work without delay, checking the boy's vital signs.

"Juubei, how is he? Is he…." Kazuki was afraid to ask. Makubex was so still and so pale. He looked so small, it was hard to believe that this was one of the Four Kings, someone so young and so delicate. How did he ever withstand all the weight? How did any of them?

"He's not breathing and his heart is erratic," replied Juubei, his hands working over the boy. "I will try to stabilize him for now, but we need to get him somewhere safe. And soon."

An explosion sounded to their right. The wall behind them shook. The battle between Ginji and Kouji was still going on.

"I understand," said Kazuki, as he deflected falling chunks of brick with his strings.

They couldn't abandon their emperor here, even with Makubex in that condition. It would be Kazuki's duty to protect them from any stray blows or debris that flew their way from the battle royale in the street. Juubei worked quickly and silently, not even looking up when an explosion hit close enough that the ground beneath his feet shook. He knew that Kazuki would protect them. Kazuki knew that Juubei would save Makubex. This was how it had always been: each man did his duty and trusted the other to do his.

On the darker side, Kazuki knew, watching the battle rage, that he couldn't leave because in the off chance that Ginji was seriously injured or defeated, he would have to finish the job. Being one of the Four Kings meant upholding the power of VOLTS against all attackers, whether they were from the Beltline above or from within. Ginji was the central pillar that supported VOLTS and all of Lower Town, and if he fell, Kazuki had to be there to catch him and finish the job, or else everything would crumble around them. And if he himself fell, then Juubei would be there to finish it. The structure was simple, and in this simplicity was the beauty of VOLTS: one following the other, one supporting the other, this line of power and succession that upheld all of Lower Town. And they all knew what the stakes were. If Kouji was allowed to escape, then other former leaders of junkyard gangs, who either joined under Ginji or stepped aside and made way for VOLTS, might attempt to seize power for themselves. Lower Town would descend into chaos and the warring era would be reborn in the struggle for power. In Mugenjou, the smell of weakness traveled fast, and the sleeping powers came like sharks called by the promise of blood. This, too, was how it had always been.

Kazuki watched the battle warily, strings at the ready. He could hear Juubei at work behind him, distantly, but his mind was focused on the battle before him. Explosions and lightning burst here and there. The buildings around them shook and reeled under the blows. The ground trembled and cracked. Fortunately, the battle seemed like it was moving away from their position. Kouji was being driven further and further down the street, clearly on the defensive, but fighting back tenaciously. Still, there was little doubt who would win this fight. Kouji was formidable—he had to be, in order to survive, much less lead his own gang, in the pre-VOLTS era—but no one can match the Raitei. The result had already been determined, and only Kouji seemed unaware of this grim fact.

Kazuki watched as the fight moved further away, his face showing no emotion, but inside, he felt a heaviness and the soft brush of memories.

A year ago perhaps, on a night not too different from this, the temperature mild for late autumn, Kazuki happened to see Seiichi sitting alone on the worn steps of a building, shaded from the last rays of the setting sun, smoking a cigarette and staring into the far distance, even though the street was narrow and the buildings crowded in on the people. The man drew lazily, unthinkingly from the glowing cigarette, the motion and routine more a comfort than the nicotine. A few people passed quietly before him on the street, but this was no busy main thoroughfare. It was a side street, a small shaded vein in southeastern Lower Town.

Kazuki thought it odd to find the man alone. He was usually seen only in the company of Suzuki Kouji, his boss. But then again, thought the Threadmaster, Juubei wasn't with him either, so maybe it wasn't so unusual. Each person had a right to his own time, after all, and they were all capable of watching out for themselves.

He approached the man slowly, letting his shoes scuffle a little in the dirt so as not to surprise the man. Seiichi looked up at the noise, saw that it was the young Fuuchoin heir, and gave him a polite, familiar nod. Kazuki walked up to Seiichi, who scooted over a bit but continued smoking and staring at nothing in particular, clearly with something on his mind that he may or may not have wanted to share. Kazuki took his gesture as an invitation to accompany him, but not necessarily share in his thoughts. He sat down gracefully beside the man.

The silence between them was long, but not uncomfortable. Seiichi eventually finished his cigarette and casually flicked the butt off to the side. He exhaled, letting the last of the smoky flavor leave him, and then was still. Kazuki waited patiently for him to make the next move.

After another moment of silence, Seiichi finally began to speak.

"You know," he said, "I sometimes wonder why you and I never really talked before. We're not all that much different, you and I, Fuuchoin-san. I think that, given a chance, we could've been friends."

"Call me Kazuki," replied the Threadmaster. "If we aren't friends, then this would be a good first step."

The older man smiled. It was odd speaking to someone much younger than himself about friendship and then being given permission to call him by his name. Then again, the youth beside him outranked him within VOLTS, so it was his prerogative to demand respect. It was only right that he reply in kind.

"Then you can call me Seiichi, instead of Matsuo-san."

"Well, then, Seiichi-san, why do you say that we're alike and yet we can't be friends?"

Seiichi paused, thinking.

"How old are you, Kazuki-san?"

"Sixteen," he replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, it's just that I remember when I was your age, I thought that anyone could be my friend if they were willing and if I was willing to try. We didn't even have to have much in common, just the willingness to reach out and get to know someone. But now I'm nearly ten years older than you, and I've come to see that not everything is so simple. Sometimes, outer circumstances will prevent even the simplest kind of connection."

Kazuki thought about this, turning it over in his mind. He knew that he wasn't as naïve now as Seiichi had been at sixteen, but just the tone of Seiichi's voice made him feel like something was lost. Just the matter-of-fact way he spoke about such things, casually dismissing the opportunity as if it wasn't a big loss, this ability to have real human contact, made Kazuki think that Seiichi had come to accept or resign himself to more than he should have.

"But there's nothing to stop us from establishing a friendship. You said so yourself that we have a lot in common, and we are both members of VOLTS. We have the same goals and the same people surrounding us, so why do you dismiss the chance from the beginning?"

Why are you so cynical and resigned?, Kazuki wanted to ask, but that wasn't something he could say to a person who wasn't even his friend, who was merely an acquaintance.

Seiichi shrugged.

"What I meant was that you and I are in the same position. We are both followers of a greater man—I have Suzuki Kouji and you have Amano Ginji. So you and I should be able to understand each other easily, since we are both subordinates by choice and I think we both made our choice for the same reason. Our leaders are both people we admire, people we respect and love. We've put our hopes and faith into them and we've decided to tie our fates to theirs. And we take pride in our position, you and me," he said, gesturing towards Kazuki. "We commit ourselves completely to our leaders and to their cause, give everything we have to them so that their success becomes our success, their goals our goals, and their glory our glory. And we don't do this because we're incapable of being leaders ourselves, you see, but because we choose to follow someone special. We choose to watch over this person, to protect him and help him achieve his goals. We might be bowed in service, but we are not lowly servants. There is honor and power in our position."

Kazuki nodded. Everything Seiichi said about himself and about Kazuki was true. He remembered trying to explain to Toshiki why he had decided to disband Fuuga and join with Amano Ginji. Toshiki had railed at him bitterly, calling him weak for assuming a subordinate position when he was the widely respected leader of Fuuga. Juubei, though, had understood the intoxicating freedom of casting your fate with someone else's, the release of giving up complete control of your destiny to someone whose personal charisma and unfailing strength demanded loyalty and respect and love. He had understood the personal power that comes from upholding someone you loved. Kazuki knew where he belonged, knew what and who he believed in, and he drew strength from his conviction.

"Everything you've said is exactly how I feel too, Seiichi-san, so what's to stop us from turning mutual understanding into friendship? Isn't this the basis for all friendships?" he asked.

Seiichi sighed. Kazuki was right of course. But still….

"Like I said, sometimes outer circumstances get in the way," he replied. "You and me, for example, may understand each other clearly and be in the same position, but our circumstances aren't the same. When a leader fails, it is doubly painful for those who follow him. For we who choose to follow, their failure is our failure, and our failure to help them is also ours. And so because your leader has succeeded where mine has failed, we are not on the same level, Kazuki-san. We have the same position, but not the same level, and so you will never be able to really understand me, and I won't ever really understand you. The gap is too wide, so any friendship would be futile."

"But Suzuki-san isn't a failure. I don't know him well, but if he was able to gain your support and loyalty, then that must mean something, right?"

"Ah," nodded Seiichi. "Kouji-san and I go far back, and I have never met anyone quite like him. He is…how should I say? He is a man torn by many passions and many desires. He is one of those fires that burn so bright that I'm afraid that he won't burn long. I've already decided to follow him wherever his path leads me, but sometimes I worry that he himself is so troubled by his passions and desires that he might lose his way. But that's what I'm here for, I guess, to make sure that he doesn't, to remind him that more than his fate rests on his shoulders. He never takes his position lightly, but sometimes I…well, never mind. Maybe now isn't the time to talk about him. My point is that within the VOLTS hierarchy, Kouji-san isn't on the same level as Ginji-san, so you and I aren't on the same level."

"But that shouldn't matter. You and I are in the same gang. We're equals in that sense, all of us—you, me, and Suzuki Kouji too—we all follow the same leader, Amano Ginji, don't we?"

Seiichi was silent. He felt the need for a cigarette return, even though he was out of them.

We all follow the same leader, right?

He shrugged and gave Kazuki a lazy smile. "Your idealism is admirable, Kazuki-san, but tell me, do you think you could ever understand your Raitei? Do you think you could ever truly understand Amano Ginji?"

Kazuki paused and wrinkled his brow. He hadn't really thought about this question before. He'd always assumed that he understood Ginji well. He certainly was one of Ginji's closest friends and they often confided their worries in each other, so that must mean that they understood each other. But was being friends with someone, close friends, necessarily the same as really knowing someone? Kazuki wondered. Could you be friends with someone, see someone every day for years and years, and never really understand them, never really know them? And when did it suddenly get so cold? he wondered. He noticed that the sun had almost completely set by now and wrapped his arms loosely around himself against the early evening air, and looked at the ground. Somehow, this question was hurting him, and this troubled him.

Seiichi watched the younger man's reaction with a small sense of satisfaction and also a faint sadness.

"I can see that you don't have an answer to that. Maybe you're unwilling to look for the answer. That's okay, you'll eventually learn that these things cannot be ignored. In the meantime, let me tell you this: what prevents you from answering is the same thing that prevents us from becoming friends. The gap between you and your leader is too wide for you to ever cross completely, just like the gap between you and me is too wide. The hierarchy demands this separation. All you can do is try to reach across and gain a mutual understanding, but know that it will be in vain. That's why I don't even try anymore, to save myself the loss. I hate to tell you this and ruin your grand illusions, but I think it is kinder to know the truth than to believe in things that will eventually crumble."

He rose to his feet and dusted off his pants.

"You know," he said, looking down at Kazuki, who was still seated and buried in his thoughts. "You know, you might still have a chance to prove me wrong. A lot can change in a year. Maybe the next time we meet, we will have closed the gap and then we could be friends. See you around, Kazuki-san," he said and waved farewell, and then walked away.

Kazuki sat thinking about all that Seiichi had said. A lot of what the man had said still bothered him. Was he right? Was he being overly optimistic in thinking that everyone was like brother and sister to each other in VOLTS? How would he know, if, as Seiichi said, it was impossible to understand those who didn't share your rank?

Kazuki sighed, and decided that these questions were best saved for another time, when he wasn't supposed to be out patrolling. He got to his feet and looked down the empty street. Seiichi was gone already. Kazuki decided to head back and find Juubei.

He only took a few steps before he paused though, struck by a sudden, odd thought. Kazuki realized that Seiichi never agreed that they all followed the same leader.

A year brings a lot of change, thought Kazuki sadly, listening to the explosions from the battle move further and further away. But then again, maybe nothing at all has changed. Maybe things have only played out the way they were meant to, inevitably.

Endnote: Raitei vs. Kouji, the big climax, next chapter, I promise.

Yes, Kazuki does the same thing in this story with Seiichi that he does with Ginji, sort of, in my other fic "Starry Night." For some reason, I see Kazuki as the type who would think about these big issues and want to talk to people about it. Shido is too much of a loner, Makubex is too young at this point, and Masaki I have no idea how to characterize (hence I cheaply and conveniently keep him out of the story…ehehehe…).