Chapter 8: Guttermouth

Sango walked over to her phone and began to dial. "Who are you calling?" Kagome asked.

"Kuranosuke. I'll need to meet with him later today if I'm going to dump him." Sango explained.

"Why wait until later? Why not just do it now?"

"You don't break up with people over the phone Kagome. That's just cruel."

"Feh. Whatever." Kagome replied, sounding very Inuyasha-ish. As coincidence would have it, Inuyasha came barging through the door. He had also been invited over earlier.

"Oy!" Inuyasha called from the doorway, announcing his arrival.

"Inuyasha," Kagome began, going to the entryway to greet Inuyasha, "you'll never guess who you just missed!"

"Who?" he asked.

"You have to guess." Kagome teased.

"But you just told me I'd never guess. If I'll never guess, what's the point?" Inuyasha asked, being a bit too logical for Kagome's liking.

"No point. I just enjoy watching you struggle. Now guess." Kagome demanded. Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

"Ralph Nader." Inuyasha guessed, just wanting to satisfy Kagome so she would tell him.

"Ralph Nader? What business would he have here?" Kagome asked, utterly confused at Inuyasha's lame guess. He shrugged.

"Lawsuit? It's not important, I guessed. Now tell me who it was." Inuyasha whined.

"Miroku." Kagome said a bit too perkily.

"Yeah. So?"

"He spent the night here. In the same room as Sango. In fact closer than that, but I promised I wouldn't get into that, who needs details anyway." Kagome continued, still perky.

"I have a pretty good guess, but I'm finding it awfully hard to believe. Anything else?"

"Well, Sango denies it, but I can't say I'd be surprised if there was some 'intimacy' if'n you get my meaning." Kagome finished, nudging Inuyasha in the ribs. Inuyasha pondered this for a moment.

"Sounds like something Miroku would do." Inuyasha admitted. "But I think Sango would have to be drunk or something to let Miroku pull shit like that."

"Hey Inuyasha." said Sango, who was finished on the phone. "What's up?"

"Screw small talk. Is it true?" Inuyasha asked, getting straight to the point.

"Is what true?" Sango asked. Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

"You and Miroku."

"KAGOME! WHAT THE HELL? YOU SAID MY SECRET WAS SAFE!" Sango yelled, infuriated.

"I lied." Kagome simply responded, a grin miles wide plastered on her face. She was obviously proud of starting the grapevine of what most likely become gossip within the next few weeks. Inuyasha's jaw fell slack.

"You and Miroku?" Our Miroku? The I'm-a-perverted-lecher-but-still-manage-to-get-the-girls-somehow Miroku? That Miroku?" Inuyasha asked, utterly stunned upon learning Kagome's story was true.

"Do we know any other Miroku's?" Kagome answered for her. Inuyasha fell to the floor, doubled over in laughter.

"This is too rich! Koga is gonna flip when he hears about it!" Inuyasha said through his laughter, apparently finding this 'impossibility' the funniest thing ever. This comment, however, didn't seem to fair well with Sango. She lifted Inuyasha off the floor or, at least enough of Inuyasha so that he and Sango were at the same eye level.

"If you tell a soul, Koga or otherwise, I will see to it personally that you never say another word again. What do you really need a tongue for anyway?" Sango growled, giving him a glare that could kill.

"Sure, whatever you say Sango." Inuyasha responded impudently. Her expression didn't change, thus signaling she was dead serious. Inuyasha didn't care to notice this though, and slowly began to recover from his laughter.

"Wipe that grin off your face mister. I think were forgetting something here." Kagome said with a smirk.

"Do I have to?" Inuyasha complained.

"Yes. Now say it."

"Fine, you were right and I was wrong." Inuyasha admitted with a scowl. "Happy?"

"Almost. There's also the lingering matter of our little wager." Kagome added. Inuyasha let out a low growl and fished out his wallet. Taking out 2400 yen (approx. twenty American dollars) he handed it to Kagome.

"There's your money. Stop pestering me."

"Thank you Inuyasha." Kagome said sweetly as she began to scratch behind his ears. Inuyasha's expression immediately softened. "Feeling better?" Kagome asked.

"Shut up and keep scratching." Inuyasha replied.

"You two bet on whether I would end up with Miroku or not?" Sango asked incuriously. "I don't believe you two. What will you be doing between betting on my relationships and spreading rumors about me?"

"Come on Sango, lighten up. We were just trying to make it a little more interesting." Inuyasha explained in both their defenses.

"Bull. With friends like you, who needs enemies?"

"They aren't rumors if they're true." Inuyasha replied, still trying to make a valid excuse for his and Kagome's behavior. Kagome but in, wanting to change the subject.

"Did you talk to Kuranosuke?" she asked Sango.

"No, he wasn't there."

"Why'd you wanna talk to him?" Inuyasha asked.

"She wants to see him later today so she can dump him." Kagome answered, once again, though the question was directed towards Sango.

"Feh. Why bother? I mean, Miroku probably wouldn't find out whether you dumped Kuranosuke or not. He's not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed." Both girls gave him a look and Kagome stopped scratching.

"You're hardly one to talk buddy." Sango said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Inuyasha yelled back. "And did I tell you to stop?" he continued to holler, turning to Kagome.

"I'm not your slave! No more for you." Kagome huffed, crossing her arms.

"Feh."

"What makes you think Miroku wouldn't notice?" Sango asked Inuyasha. "It would be pretty hard to not make it obvious to one or the other."

"Well, it's not so much that he wouldn't notice. It's more that he's probably going to do the same thing himself." Inuyasha explained his theory.

"You are so critical! You act as if Miroku has no morals at all." Kagome said.

"He doesn't, at least not when it comes to women. You know how he is." Inuyasha replied.

"Double or nothing?" Kagome challenged.

"Definitely!" Inuyasha snapped back, still hoping to prove he was right.