Chapter Eleven: You Got Me Like a Loaded Gun

Shelby

"She's been lying to you the entire time Scott. Jenny's the one who's been lying." Shelby repeated as Jennifer stood up defensively.

"What proof do you have, the sick delusions that you continually make up in your head?" Jennifer shot back, not willing to give up Scott just yet.

"Your cousin confessed." Shelby replied as Jennifer's face was full of surprise.

"Th-There's nothing to confess."

"So you didn't impersonate a troubled teen in order to come here and get a second shot with Scott? Am I lying?"

"She's not." Augie chimed in, appearing from the shadows. "Jennifer's been lying all along."

"Scott." She began to explain. "Look at me baby. Who are you going to believe? Me, who you love, or your cheating ex-girlfriend.

"I- I want to talk to your cousin."

Manny

"You're on your way to Horizon now. I don't want or expect to hear of any trouble from you because if you do, that's it. I will not longer support you." Ms. Santos explained.

"I haven't done anything to deserve to be here."

"Manuela, you've been cutting yourself, being promiscuous, and taking stolen anti-depressants." Her mother argued back.

"And did it ever occur to you mom … why I've been doing these things?" Manny asked. "How do you expect me to feel going home to that big house without anyone to even notice that I walked in? All I wanted was a little love."

"Nonsense. Nonsense!" Ms. Sanots repeated. "Love? Please Manny. Love doesn't exist. It's all about looking after yourself and frankly, you've become a burden." She paused. "I can't have you going around depressing my finance and tempting him."

"Why, because you're afraid to find out that he doesn't really love you … that no one ever could." Manny declared. "I wish my dad was here.

"Your father was a fool … filled with dreams that nearly left us bankrupt. Be grateful that you have a financial provider." Ms. Santos exclaimed as Manny started playing with the bandages that were wrapped around her wrists. She can remember, all too well, the day that she did them … the events that caused them, the last time she saw Craig.

FLASHBACK

Jimmy

"Dude, I am telling you that Manny is coming over there with a knife. She's lost it." Jimmy explained to Craig, who he had called as soon as Manny left.

"No way. I know she hates me, but she'd never hurt me." Craig explained.

"What about Ashley? Don't you think she deserves to know?" Jimmy questioned him further.

"Yeah. You're right." Craig paused for a moment. "Why don't you go call the police with your suspicions. Tell them to be at Ash's house … that's where I'm going." Craig answered hoping that he could talk her out of this.

Craig

"Manny, what are you doing here?" Craig questioned her as soon as he walked out of the house.

"I came to see you … and say goodbye." She added.

"Oh. You want to come in?"

"No, we can just stay out here." Manny responded. "I really don't have much to say at all anyway."

"Where are you going?" Craig asked as the feeling of being threatened transformed into a sudden urge to be with Manny. She looked so young and vulnerable, just like she did two years ago back in Grade 8.

"My mom's making me transfer. I'm leaving Degrassi." Manny gave me a small smile. "It's kind of what everyone wants for me anyway, right? To go away…"

"No!" Craig said abruptly. "No, I want you to stay."

"You don't have to lie to me. Everything's fine." Manny looked down, thinking about how good it would feel just to slice a small part of her skin … not too much, but just enough so that she'd feel the pain.

Or maybe she'd just take a couple of those pills that she'd stolen from Stephanie. Anti-depressant or something like that. After this conversation with Craig, she was going to need a million of those.

"I'll just go now. I've still got to tell Hazel and Steph."

"Wait," Craig said. "Why don't you come in for a while?"

Ashley

"Manny's not over at my house." Ashley told Jimmy who had called to make sure that nothing had happened to her.

"Do you think she's at Craig's then?"

"Bingo." I responded, hanging up the phone and jetting over there. No one was going to hurt Craig, especially not Manny.

Manny

"Craig…" Manny whispered softly, suddenly realizing that she was not dreaming. She was lying in bed next to Craig and he was getting ready to kiss her again.

"Hmm?" He stopped, staring deeply into her eyes.

"Is this real?" She asked knowing that this type of behavior would only get her sent to Horizon sooner. "I mean, do you really love me?"

"Oh my God." Ashley gasped, feeling like the weight of the world had just been added to her shoulders. CraigandManny. Again.

"I'm sorry Ashley. You shouldn't have … had to see this." Craig rushed over to Ashley, leaving Manny alone as he desperately tried to explain. After fifteen minutes had passed, without any word from Craig, Manny got the picture. She had let herself be used … again.

"I knew it wouldn't last…" She searched for the knife she'd taken from Jimmy's house and pressed the blade into the center of her wrist, contemplating as to whether she should go for the blade or not…

END

"Manuela … we're here." Ms. Santos informed her daughter who had barely had time to recover in the hospital before being brought here.

"Okay." She whispered quietly, regressing back to the shy, innocent girl she used to be. Only now, she was too broken to care about anything or anyone.

(A/N: Okay, this part of the story is over … a "Pre-Chapter" that lasted for 11 chapters. Anyway, I'll continue this story and express Manny's interactions with the kids at Horizon with "Till I Get Over You." Otherwise, this story will be way over 20 chapters. I'll try to update weekly or every two weeks on Sundays … today, so be on the look-out. Thanks for reviewing!! –NL)

A Special thanks to …

Keke1

Mandy

Lovefromthefire

Lacey

Julia