A/N: Woah, sorry about the delay. This chapter was giving me tons of trouble that can be summarized to this "sadist!Eddie." To all those who have been unable to find the tiny bit of suspence, it was "what is Eddie's definition of love"

Demus: Thank you for your nice review. I don't think there are many people out there who've thought about Eddie/Marvin. I'm glad you think I've characterized Zaphod correctly. I'll throw in slash when I can.

Eryka O.G.: Thank you, I'm glad you like it.

HurriCanine: I'm glad you like Eddie. I started a drawing of him and Marvin as kittens, I doubt I'll finish it though. I pretty much had something like that in mind for Ford and his local customs.

Jade: I'm happy that you're enjoying this

Cassie: It's ok, you're certainly the most devoted reviewer. It's impossible to be Marvin and Ford at the same time. 3 3

Totally Not Courtney: WHO ARE YOU NOT-COURTNEY! This isn't a very fluffy couple, I do the best I can though.

Kayu Silver: I'm flattered that you enjoy my story that much. Sorry about the incredibly long delay, though.

Vogon Jelts: It's ok Sorry about the delay, but believe me, you would have not liked the first draft of the chapter.

Artemis Rowen: I'm glad Eddie's love of Marvin makes you happy. Perhaps Ford shall get his wish.

Rhya Stormbringer: I'm happy to know that you're enjoying this.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of love:

Avoid if at all possible.

The definition that Eddie was given was as follows, "Nothing you'll need to worry about." It also included how to identify when a creature was in love, how to respond to a creature in love and other useful tidbits. Obnoxiously, some of the signs contradicted each other, which actually made it impossible to diagnose.

Eddie reasoned that the best way to find out about love was to ask someone who experienced it. Given that the symptoms of love applied to every member of the crew, he felt that no one person would be any more useful than the next.

The next day, the crew had returned. Zaphod and Trillian managed to get in contact with Chabok and threatened his lab if he didn't finish what he had started. Ford had returned, grinning more than usual, while Arthur was more paranoid than normal.

Eddie walked to the bridge to speak with Zaphod.

"Thank you for allowing me to open and close for you," the door remarked joyously as Eddie stepped through it.

"You're welcome," Eddie replied, then proceeded to walk towards Zaphod.

Zaphod was sitting by the controls, watching the news on the screen. He was making sure there were no reports about him, since his new bug-eyed acquaintance could have easily let something leak. Yet clearly he was disappointed at each story that had nothing to do with him, and complained that the news was irrelevant and boring.

Eddie sat in a seat next to Zaphod's. "Hi, Mr. Beeblebrox," he said cheerfully.

"Hey, kid," Zaphod responded, in a manner that he hoped said, 'I know you want to talk to me, everyone does, but I'm more important than you, so it'll have to wait.'

The tone failed at its task. "Mr. Beeblebrox, are you in love with Trillian?" Eddie asked this in a way that was reminiscent of a child questioning where babies come from.

"Yeah, sure." His voice in every way said, 'go away.'

"How can you tell?" Eddie knew that his presence was not wanted, but he dearly wanted to know what love was.

Zaphod groaned and waved one of his hands wildly in the air. "Look, kid, this is a question for Trillian. Ok? Go bother her."

Eddie didn't bother to ask where she was. He got up and walked to the computer. "Eddie," the android said, addressing his computer self, "can you tell me where Trillian is?"

"Sure thing feller, I'm just thrilled to perform any task you ask of me!" A few lights flashed briefly. "She's currently in the kitchen area. Anything else you'd like me to do?"

"No, that's all, thank you."

"You're welcome! If you ever need me, don't hesitate to ask!" The computer became inactive while it eagerly awaited its next task.

Eddie left the bridge and made his way to the kitchen.

Trillian was sitting, eating something which resembled a biscuit but had the texture of cardboard and the taste of chocolate. Once you got past the texture, it was quite enjoyable.

Eddie sat across from her.

"Hello, Eddie," Trillian said politely.

"Hi, Trillian!" Eddie smiled.

A comfortable silence had built up around them. Comfortable as it was, Eddie found it unwelcome and got it to leave with the question, "Trillian, do you love Zaphod?"

She was startled by the question. Trillian took a moment to think about it. She did find his quirks...quirky, and she couldn't think of anyone she'd rather be with. Well if it wasn't love, it was close enough for her. "Yes, why do you ask?"

"What is love?" Eddie asked.

"Oh..." Trillian bit her lower lip while trying to remember some useless definition. "Love is... Love is when you value someone else's happiness above your own." She looked at him. "Does that help?"

"Yes, thank you." Eddie smiled more brightly. He was about to leave when another thought struck his mind. "Do you know where Arthur is?"

Trillian blinked. "He's most likely in his cabin."

"Ah, thank you." Eddie then left the room.

Trillian looked in the direction he had gone to and wondered what had just happened.

Arthur was, indeed, in his cabin, as was Ford.

There was a knock at the door, which Ford reluctantly answered before going back to sit next to Arthur. Eddie stepped through the door, which gave a happy sigh.

"Umm...Hello, Eddie," Arthur said, while straightening out his bathrobe. "Do you umm...need anything?"

Eddie smiled pleasantly. "Tea-drinker, what is love?"

Arthur paused then decided he had heard him wrong. "What?"

"What is love?" Eddie repeated calmly.

"Oh..." There was another pause.

Continuing to smile, Eddie added, "If you can tell me, I won't be upset with you anymore."

That failed to make the question less difficult. "Well then...it's um..." Arthur waved his hands about as if this would help him push the answer in his general direction. "It's when you..." He sighed. "I don't know."

"That's too bad." Eddie said, still smiling.

Ford looked at Arthur, then at Eddie. "Can I help him?"

Eddie returned Ford's stare. "If you want."

Ford grinned then lifted Arthur's chin and kissed him. He broke the kiss and looked back at Eddie. "That's love."

A/N: Well, the next chapter's probably the last one unless something really wild happens. This chapter is dedicated to MeiCailya, who really helped me out with this chapter, and forced me to finish it, and Cassie because...she's CASSIE and she'd probably kill me if I didn't finish this soon.