Chapter 5: Change

So, now that I'm going on a 'not-officially-a-date' date with Adrian, I guess I won't need Disher's help. It's really a shame, too, because I know he'd do anything for me. I mean, you gotta give the guy credit for trying. Maybe I could use his help. I could arrange for him to talk to Adrian after our "date," just to see how he reacts.

That's actually a perfect idea! I just hope Adrian doesn't realize what I'm doing. The last thing I want to do is hurt him. I just want to make sure he's ready for this and maybe we can try having a relationship.

Man, I never thought I'd hear myself saying that. But Adrian can be such a sweet man. He won't be the same without all his quirks, true, but he could end up being even better.

I can't wait to find out.

In the meantime, I have to get ready for our "date." I made reservations at a nice, not too formal, but not too casual restaurant a couple of streets over called La Terraza. And after dinner, I thought we'd go see a play. I considered dancing, but I don't really think Adrian's much of a dancer.

I can't believe how nervous I am about this. It's not like it's an actual date. But I've still got all those butterflies making the rounds in my stomach, like there's some kind of convention going on in there. I guess I'm just hoping something'll happen, something that'll show me he's really ready to move on, to take a stab at having a relationship with someone that's not Trudy.

Oh my God, someone's here. I don't know why I'm so jumpy lately. I mean, it's just Adrian, and we're just having dinner, something I would do with anybody, even Disher.

I guess I should just go answer the door. It's probably just -

"Adrian." What is he doing here so early? Our "date" isn't for another 3 hours. I hope he hasn't changed his mind. Or talked to Disher. "You're early."

"Uh, yeah," he says nervously, wringing his hands. This does NOT look good. "Sharona, about dinner..."

"You want to cancel," I finish for him. I should have known. I was expecting too much. "It's okay. I understand. It takes time and you aren't ready."

"No, that's not it," he corrects me. "I AM ready."

Oh, great, so now it's just me that's holding him back. "Oh. I see. I guess I can refer you to a dating agency..."

"No, I don't want to go to some singles service," he interrupts me again.

He sure isn't making this easy. "I don't know what else to do to help you."

"Go with me to dinner," he blurts out, looking very proud of himself.

Okay, now I am really confused. "I thought you didn't want to go to dinner."

He shakes his head, saying, "I never said that. You just assumed that."

"But, still, Adrian, we were already going to dinner."

"But it wasn't a date," he says softly.

Oh my God. Is he asking me out? "Adrian, are you asking me out?"

He looks down at his feet. Oh my God. He IS asking me out. "Uh, yeah, I guess that's what I'm doing. But I'm prepared for...for you saying no." He turns his face up and looks at me. "Please don't say no."

Am I dreaming? Ouch. I guess not. This is actually happening. He's ready to move on with his life. With me.

"Sharona...Are you okay?" Oh, yeah, I'm okay. I'm more than okay. I am absolutely fantastically fabulous. But I can't let him see that. I don't want to seem desperate or come off too strong.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine," I respond, somehow making my voice sound calm and unaffected. "I'm just a little surprised, that's all. Pleasantly surprised, that is," I quickly add. The last thing I need him thinking is that I don't want to go out with him. "I would love to go to dinner with you, Adrian."

He gets that smile on his face that he gets when he's realized he's solved a case and announces he's leaving and he'll be back later to pick me up for our date. God, it feels good to say that.

I follow him to the door and close the door behind him. I watch him as he gets in his car, waves timidly though the window in my door, then drives off.

I skip happily back to my bedroom, belting out Marvin Gaye.

That's right, baby. Let's get it on.