I'd Kill for You

by Seto'swhiterose

COMPLETE Seto Kaiba is the bearer of an unbearable secret: On off hours he is an assassin. He despises his work, but what happens when it pits him against the one person he thinks he hates, Joey Wheeler? SxJ, yaoi CONTAINS SOME ADULT THEMES!

8. My Bonfire

Hello, my fine readers, (as Seto would say)! I can't believe how many reviews poured in after the last chapter...it was amazing! I hope you guys like this chapter as much.Oh and sorry but no definite lemons, (I decided not to tempt fate and risk getting kicked off the site), but sure fire love, (I think they call that a lime? I don't know). Yeah, I heard only the nicest things about my last chapter, makes the authoress happy! I'm so glad you like this stuff, you guys, it really means so much to me…(tears)…and especially now that the I am actually beginning to plan the ending! OMG! Well, any requests, just drop a review! Oh and I have so many loyal and wonderful reviewers…I love you all! You all deserve a big present for reviewing…but I just don't know what to get you all. Lol. Kisses!

Response to Loyal/Lovely/Loquacious/other l-alliterations that mean something good Reviewers:

x close the spaces x: Hey! Thank you for reviewing! Totally cool to get another reviewer, especially one that was so wonderful! You rock, too. Aww, you don't have to bow, you just have to worship…lol, just kidding. That was really nice of you to say something like that, totally boosts my confidence. You felt bad for the rabbit? Me too! But in my stories, I usually try to write something about how an abused animal or person gets rescued from a life of torture. So that was my signature, the abused animal. Kind of sick? You bet. But the rabbit will be safe now! No worries! Thank you again, and I'll update as soon as possible for y'all! Thank you, please read and review this chapter, I'm dying to know what you think.

M15t4k5n: Hey! Thanks for the review! I love the code name, as well…lol. What does it mean? Anyway, yes that's how Seto would be. I try to totally get under his skin and get in his character to write from his POV. It can be difficult, but I do try. Thanks for the compliment, please read and review!

MotherCHOWGoddess: Wow! Thank you for the wonderful review! Incredible! Holy sugar molds, (curse the censors on this site…), thank you! That's, like, the highest compliment…I love that song "Paint it Black"! One of my definite favorites, ever. You like RS? Cool. I must give total respect to the artists, I cannot just use their stuff and pretend to ignore them. The release of the album? Wow, I am totally not old enough for that…I feel like a baby now…(cries)…just kidding. Well, I think you are definitely cool. And yes, I cry for the rabbit…even though I never saw "MP & the Holy Grail". Mokuba is gentle, though, he's in good hands. Five stars? Whoa! Thanks a bunch! Means a lot to me, wow. Thanks again! Can't wait to hear from you!

"Muchacha": Yes, kill them all, Seto…that is the child prodigy for you. Yeah, but it really did work out for him, (except for the whole D.B. thing, but that's not that bad). He is a little psychotic, but that's why he needs Jou so much, not only to get better as quickly as possible so the story can freaking continue already, but also to kind of work him out a little bit, you know? Of course you do, you're the loyal reviewer. Yes, Jou said "I love you,"…isn't that sweet? The drama! Of course! How could I possibly resist? That was kind of a climax, I honestly don't know where the definite climax begins in this story, or whether these whole next chapters will just be dénouements, but it doesn't really matter, I guess. I should just wait until the end to work it all out. Anyway, thanks a lot for the review, and please read this chapter, I love hearing from you!

"Green Eggs and Ham": Hey, thanks for both reviews! That was fun to read them both, very cool. Lol. I seriously do not mind one little bit. Seto won't die, have no fear! I wouldn't make the main character just die off like that. Especially lovely Seto! Aww…don't cry…(hugs)…it'll be ok! Seto's emotions are so complex, sometimes it's difficult to portray them all. So I recruit the help of songs like "Paint it Black" to help with such. It works out like you wouldn't believe, really it does. Lol. YAY! You noticed Seto's narration change as he kind of transcended into madness a teeny bit. Choppier, and he's not using big words. Big kudos to you! The sword fighting scene was a little odd, I know, but I'm glad you liked it. Of course the bunny will live, I couldn't possibly kill it off being all alone and dying from those horrible people, (and yes Seto has a soft spot for animals…). Ruroni Kenshin? No one else said that, but perhaps it is…hmm… I love D.B. Yes I do…one day she and I will become friends, but I must wait until she turns real first, lol. Ok, I'm weird. But seriously, I'm glad you cared for her, a likeable villain, eh? Yay! That's good, yes? Not killing someone who asks for it is more torture? I see it. That's kind of why Seto let her live, I suppose. You're right. Yes, people mentioned Joey's confession…I loved that part…He really meant it! More on that in here. Oh and yes, I meant "excess" but I suppose that "excuses" works, too…(nods). SO yeah! Don't worry about the dual reviews, I have nooo problem with it…thanks so much for the long review, though, and how was my e-mail? Fun? Lol, probably no comment…yeah I'm boring. Anyway, thanks again, and enjoy this new chapter!

Fire Kitten: Nice to hear from you, (twice)! Don't worry about it, it happens, I realize that. Thanks for being so dedicated! Wow! That was cool. Yes, the poor, poor, poor, poor rabbit…(cries for rabbit). But Mokuba's taking care of it, now. He's in good hands, you can be sure! Cliché but so wonderful, isn't it? That was one of my favorite scenes when Joey confessed his love. So nice! Seto did get hurt by the bullet, but he had all these adrenaline shots when he was fighting, that's why he didn't feel it, in case you were wondering. You like the death? Well, that's ok, I suppose…I mean, I'm the one who wrote it, that's totally cool. Seto is a little insane, though, yes? Lol. Sorry if it was creepy, but you still like him, right? Save that rabbit, Seto! Go on! Short but sweet? Oh that's always wonderful to hear. The rabbit won't die, have no fear! I wouldn't be that evil, it's not in my nature…oh, not the puppy dog eyes…I can't resist! Alright, (throws a chapter to reviewers), happy? Yay! Please read and review! I love hearing from you! Maybe on Joey's POV, maybe…you never know…I don't even know. Thanks again!

Nachzes Black-Rider: Hi, again! Aww…you loved it? Thank you! That was so sweet! Fluff? Why yes, there was a few tendrils of it in that last chapter…of course Seto hates animal cruelty! It's just totally in his nature, you know? Besides, who could possibly stand to see a little rabbit like that go to suffer…(cries)…and yes Mokuba would like anything furry…lol! Gore? Oh…what else? Lol! Glad you liked it! Please r&r this chapter, I love hearing from you!

"AriEmeraldStar": Hey! It was so cool to get your review! Thanks a lot! Aww…I feel bad that your internet was interrupted…I'm sorry! You like the fic? Thanks! I thought the idea was kind of original, but I wasn't too sure, but you've never seen it before, so that's pretty good, I guess. Try to be unique! Wow! A faithful reviewer! That is such an honor! Thanks a lot! If you'd like, I can e-mail you whenever I update, if you'd drop in your e-mail address, I'd be more than happy to! Hmm…chisai…I can definitely use this! Once more, I offer you thanks, and please read this chapter! I want to know what you think of it!

yami'skoi: Yes I love you AND my RSLI Syndrome! Lol! But you more. Aww…I'm sorry your internet died! That's so sad! (cries) If you want condolences, I offer you my hand. Lol! Anyway, yes…Seto singing…just think of that for a moment…lol! Oh, I think your thoughts…Seto lies to or kills everything he sees…hmm…bottomless pit of darkness. Indeed! You have such an excellent grasp of this story, it's amazing! Yes! I must keep what I originally wrote! (If I ever don't, I would love for you to tell me, so I can correct it! This is very important to me, keeping my story straight…) I'm afraid of reading over my work sometimes, too. I make soo many mistakes, sometimes I just get totally messed up and have to go hide in my corner, (well, not really, but you know). Seto's emotions are always second place. It's a good trick when in places like that, you're right. In a way, it's good they didn't know that Seto and Joey were in love…it keeps things more on the down low, a little. Yay for Seto's apathy! He's so tough…yay so badly for him! Oh come on, animal cruelty, come on! How could he possibly stand something like that? I sure as hell couldn't! Especially when they were comparing it to Joey! I mean, that's just brutal…I shan't blame Seto for that. And neither would you, yay. I believe that Seto's powers are exactly like you said, it's like this adrenaline syndrome. His influences to fight may vary, though, but usually it's about protecting what he has, because his whole life he's been guarding with his life everything he owns, (family, company, etc.). So that may answer for his adrenaline syndrome. His powers didn't "vanish" when he was about to kill D.B., they just kind of dissipated a little bit. I think it was because he stopped moving and stood still in front of her. Or it could be because he wanted to teach her a lesson, that's true. Yes, he did all of that for Jou. He loves him! I think that that's sad and cute, don't you? Aww…Tsumi wants to help Seto! That's so adorable! Leave everything to Jou. He loves Seto, he'll protect him! Seto sleeps because he's near death, but I don't think he wants to because of what Jou said…hmm…aww, thank you for reviewing! As always, it was a pleasure reading your thoughts! You liked the length? It wasn't too short? Really? That's good. Thanks! Until next we speak, Tsumi!

gigabyt: Hello! I'm so glad you like it! Ah! Put down the fortune cookie! Don't hurt me! Lol. Thank you for the fortune cookie! Aww…I deserve a cookie! Thanks a bunch! I like them, too. Hmm…I get a fortune! Someday I will own YGO…someday…oh yes, someday…I'm already plotting my take-over. If not to make my own episodes about yaoi, to own the rights to everyone's favorite bishounen! Let's see…what would be the first thing I would do with Seto…I don't know! There are so many things I would love to put him through…I must decide, if this fortune cookie proves true, that is. Don't worry, I'm sure that one day you will get a fortune exactly like this one, but you can own the rights to Jou. Lol! Just kidding! As I said in the beginning, (kind of copying what you said in the review because it was so perfect), let the yaoi commence!

"kaibajoey1": Glad you enjoyed, once more! You should write fics, I would read them…and I bet you would be pretty good, too, judging by your love of yaoi. No problem to e-mail you. Not one! In fact, I'm glad you conceded, it makes me happy…Hmm…the longer it takes the better the chapter…very true! I must remember this…well, I take slow enough anyway. Umm…wait…didn't you review twice? Lol. You said different things both times, too…that was pretty cool. But I don't mind at all, it's actually really nice to get two reviews from the same person. But anyway, until next time, bye!

Xaio-Darkcloud: Hi again! Yes, Kaiba rocks…very much I must say! I had no other idea of what to call the rabbit, Alice seemed the only thing appropriate, because of Alice in Wonderland, but also because of "Alice in Chains" the band. That's what the rabbit reminded me of the most, I think. You finished Alice in Wonderland? Cool! I heard that it was about politics in England, (old politics dating to when the guy wrote the book). Am I right? Anyway, thanks for the review, ttyl!

yamijenny: Hello! How are you? How's the story coming, good I hope? Yay…my story is surprising to the readers…mwuahaha…no one knows what's coming, lol. I do like your story. It's good! Anyway, please r&r this chapter, it would mean a lot to me!

"forsakensanityslayer": Hi! I love your name, it's really cool…but I'm glad you like the story! It means a lot to me when people say that! I shall try my best to remain in good respects. Oh and the ending? Umm…do you have any suggestions? I'm totally open to them and if you have something that you want to happen let me know and I'll consider it! Thanks a lot, please read and review this chapter!

ZombieDarkElf: Hello! Another great chapter! Wow, thanks! You implied that all my chapters are great…that is so nice of you! Thank you lots! You liked the fighting scene? It wasn't too non-descriptive? That's nice to hear…I was kind of worried about that. But, you have encouraged me some. So, yes, please read and review, I loved hearing form you!

Neko Mansura: Woof! Umm…yeah, I didn't know what to say to your meowing, but I thought it was cool, so…umm…yeah, just ignore me…ehe? Sad ending? Aww, I'm sorry! But hopefully this chapter is nicer. I hope. It shan't end sadly…or at least I don't think…not sure yet, you know? A bang? Definitely. You like it? So glad! That means a lot to me…you want to read it to the end? That's right…and I certainly hope you do. You're an excellent review. Thanks again, until next we speak!

Hazel-Beka: Yay! You've arrived! I couldn't be happier! I am thrilled…lol! Yes, Joey has confessed his love at last! And don't worry about Seto dying, you're right…that would make the worst ending possibly imagined I believe. OK, maybe not the worst, but it would be pretty far up there. When in doubt kill off the characters? I honestly never heard that before. Interesting, lol. If you ever have the opportunity to listen to the Rolling Stones, please seize it! You sound like the kind of person who would like them, and the song is one of my favorites, so by all means. Well, I sort of have to write Joey's accent because it is one of Seto's biggest turn-ons about Joey. So I totally have to stick with it, it's like a rule. Shorter? Yes, I apologize…but that was the only way to end the chapter, and so it is. There you have it! Thank you for your compliments and for enjoying this as you do, it means a lot to the authoress! Please read and review, I'd love to hear from you!

Ru-Chan: Thanks for the review! Cool, so you went back and looked at it? That means a lot to me, thanks a lot. Sorry again, I am pretty stupid I suppose. You liked the chapter? Thanks! Keep writing I shall. Please read, I would enjoy for you to read and tell me what you think.

Marz: Hello! I so missed you! Thanks for coming back! Yay! You've been in the middle of nowhere? Well, that sucks…I hate being nowhere. (sings "Nowhere Man" which is owned by the Beatles and not her) Er, sorry…ehe? Anyway, no, no, no…Kaiba wouldn't be killed off…he is my favorite character…I would so totally not kill him! You liked the history? Well, thanks. Most swords do have names, it's actually pretty common. You liked the basement scene? Even though Seto was like a basket case? Well, thanks again! Ehe? I had to make Seto a basket case, even if for those last chapter, it made it all seem more real, right? Oh please tell me I'm right… Joey is sort of like a little comic relief, I feel, so I'm happy you were amused even if it was a tad mean of Joey. Yes we shall get there, I assure you…lol… Thanks for reassuring me about the length, I felt really bad about it, but thanks. Only 7? Eh, don't worry about it. As long as you're happy! I mean your chapters are great, don't change a thing! Seriously. I love them! It is kind of hard to write…but eh, I like it, so it's not totally boring and hateful. You can write action I bet…if you can enjoy it you can write it, it's just like that most of the time. You lied the song? So do I. I'm happy they're dead, too…that rabbit thing was designed to o far, I usually have some animal rescue stories in my fics, this was the case with that rabbit. They did have it coming, did they not? Yes that scene was nothing but pure kawaii-ness right there. Only home on weekends? Well, that kind of sucks…but I don't mind, I'm just worried about your boredom, lol. Take your time reviewing, no rush! Thanks for all your compliments and for taking the time to review, means a lot to me, as I'm sure you know. You did not bore me, I loved the review, thanks a lot! Until next we speak, (how long it will be, who knows?)!

Warning: Ok, this is getting serious! This chapter has a lot of yaoi goodness in it, if you are too young or whatever, I advise you to leave now! Very important! I don't want to corrupt the minds of young'ins…I'd never forgive myself! And if you have a problem with yaoi…well, just go. PLEASE GUYS! Leave now!

Disclaimer: I don't own YGO, but according to a recent fortune cookie I received, it may be coming my way…lol, not really, Kazuki Takahashi! It was a joke…ehe? (is carried away by men in suits) Ahh! No! Don't take me! Oh and I don't own The Sound of Music, (for however briefly it's mentioned in here)…

Chapter 8: My Bonfire

I don't think I dreamt. There was just black…endless black…swimming in a sea of black, forever.

It wasn't normal sleep. I was partially aware of time passing. I knew when it was an hour, two hours, three hours…I don't know how. But it felt like I was standing, not falling anymore. I was just standing in this space, nothing above me, nothing below me, my body wasn't touching anything. Free floating, almost. No sights, no sounds…nothing to keep me occupied. But I had no thoughts. If I did they were only of Wheeler, his confession of love towards me.

It was so peaceful…heavenly, almost. I could finally be a carefree being, for a little while at least.

However, every now and then, in the darkness, there was a slight noise. Ever so slightly, I was aware of Wheeler's voice…whispering. He said things, but I couldn't figure out what they were. He spoke incoherently, his voice magnified by the abyss I swam in. Only one sentence was apparent, only one. "I love ya'…I love ya'…"

I didn't have any wants, really. At first, all I wanted was to stay in this abyss forever. It was so peaceful, so serene, nothing to harm me. I felt the seconds tick by, and there I was finally at peace with the world. So peaceful…

I'm sure it was days that I stayed in this place of solitude and tranquility. I felt them slip away without the slightest bit of annoyance or anger. They just passed, innocently and without a reason for me to hate them.

But there was something nagging at my being. Something…I hated it at first. Why not leave me in peace? Just let me be, after years of living with constant pain, the line between the emotional and the physical so thin, so confused in me. And forced to suffer in silence, hide it all from the world, afraid of it being exploited, made worse by the cruel hands of people. The blackness held no pain. Why couldn't I live there forever, must everything be stolen from me?

But eventually I knew what it was, nagging me to come back to the world of the living. I felt it every time I heard Wheeler's voice.

Love.

I needed to feel him again. I longed for him there in the not-so-painless darkness. I couldn't see him…I needed to. Wheeler…that's what I would leave that place for.

In the end, that was all I thought about, just Wheeler and how I pined so much for him. I began to try and revive myself, leave the dark world. But I couldn't find my way…I called for Wheeler. "Wheeler…Wheeler…" It was like a mantra, waiting for him to lead me out.

And then one day I just found it.

The way out…I was pulled through the darkness and suddenly was able to feel again.

I felt my body first. I was lying down on something soft, wearing pants, but no shirt. Something was wrapped tightly around a throbbing shoulder, but the pain wasn't nearly as bad as I remembered it to be. A blanket was thrown over me, I recognize the sheets. I was lying in my own bed. My water bed of Gozaburo.

Someone, a person, was next to me; I could feel the sinking of the water mattress and I could hear a light sobbing, human sobbing. A warm hand clutched mine, squeezing it as if for dear life.

Wishing to investigate the situation further, I began to slowly lift my eyelids. Slowly, ever so slowly, they were not used to being open after so long. My pupils needed time to adjust to light again.

As soon as they were completely open, I needed to focus them in on a clear picture. Unfortunately, that picture had to have been the ceiling, on which my stepfather had embellished his crazy ideologies. At least now there was no dispute, I was safe in my room. I quickly ignored the black kanji, and turned my head, (with creaks of protest from my sore neck), to the person next to me.

I wasn't surprised that it was Wheeler. But I was shocked at his state. He seemed to be in total despair, sobbing quietly, and saying things in muffled tones because of his tears. I briefly caught the words, "Just wake up…Seto, please…"

My heart tore in two. He was crying for me. My mouth hung open deftly, wishing to scream my affection at him in any attempt to cease his sobs, but no words came out. My tongue refused to form a complete thought.

I needed to repair this. My heart would not allow him to be so upset for my sake, I deserved it not, (and neither did he, for that matter).

So I gently raised my other hand, (the right one that he was not clinging to), and tenderly brushed the blonde bangs, (slightly sweaty from the exertion of crying), away from his face. It was a gesture all its own.

Like magic, Wheeler's head bounced up as soon as I had placed my hand affectionately behind his ear for safe keeping.

Blood-shot chocolate eyes and double lines of ghostly liquid trailing down his perfect face stared back at me. "S-seto…" he whispered, as if afraid to break the word. "You're…are ya' alive?"

I blinked, aware of his foolishness, but bursting with pride at it all the same, and gave him a smile—a true genuine smile so unlike a CEO—nodding my answer.

One second, (maybe even a millisecond), passed before Wheeler was suddenly up like a shot, (frighteningly quick, as a matter of fact), and giving me the tightest hug of my life. Seriously, this was tighter than anything Mokuba had given me through all our years at the orphanage, as impossible as that might seem. I couldn't even breathe, (not to mention the throbbing pain in my shoulder worsening, but I flatly refused to acknowledge it in this hug).

"Seto!" He yelled, squeezing me ever tighter, constricting my breathing like a clamp. "Ya' ok!" But I relished in the embrace all the same. For I could feel his body at last against mine, his hard chest molding with my own for the brief minute. My vision was clouded with yellow straw from his matted hair, tickling my eyes in the best way possible. I could even smell him. He had his own smell, as every person does, and I lavished my nostrils with his heavenly aroma.

"Damn…" he said, finally letting go of me for a moment, and staring straight into my eyes, hard enough to make my breath catch in my throat. "I was so goddamn worried about ya'! I thought you was dead…"

I smirked at him in a very Seto Kaiba-like manner. "Once again, Wheeler…jumping to conclusions…that will get you in trouble some day." After all, I was still Seto Kaiba.

He smiled at me and said, "Once again, Kaiba, gettin' the whole world to save ya'. That'll get ya' in trouble one day."

It was only after he said this that I thought to look down at my state. I was right, my shirt had been removed and a bandage was wrapped tightly around my shoulder. I felt the embarrassment creep into my soul for a moment, curse my scars. The constant source of my ruin.

But then again, Wheeler had already seen my scars…would he still even care?

No chances. I pulled away from him, (despite the pain my heart shot through me as punishment for leaving his divine body), and moved back towards the side of the bed. There was no shirt anywhere I looked. Damn.

"What day is it?" I asked, my gruff, regular tone back again. Shouldn't we both just try to cover up that last hug? It was a moment of weakness, if we never spoke of it again, no one would have to know.

Wheeler suddenly looked embarrassed. I suppose because he was the one who had initiated the embrace, and I was the one who ultimately rejected it in the end. He wasn't looking at me anymore, and his face tilted slightly downward in unwilling candid shame. "Uh…it's uh…umm…I dunno. I think it's been abou' four days since ya' last woke up, though…"

I was shocked. My eyes widened. "Four days?"

He nodded, still not looking at me. "Yeah. Uh…yeah." He nodded again.

As I lamented in my bare torso, I decided to ask him a question. One that I really wanted to know the answer to, for it had slightly confused me, "Why were you crying?"

At this, Wheeler shot straight up off the bed. He stared at me for a moment, then lost his nerve and looked away again. "I wasn' cryin'…I jus'…had somethin' in my eye…" He went and rubbed his eye with the back of his hand to prove it.

I wanted to smile so much, but I didn't want to make it look like I was mocking him or laughing at him. I just…suddenly felt so warm when he acted like himself in that way. I don't know why. Alright, well, I guess I do…

Wheeler stood there rubbing his eyes for a moment longer, and then tried a desperate attempt to change the topic. "Well, let's get some friggin' light in here!" He moved over to the window and ripped apart the curtains, pouring mid day light into every crevice of the room.

Naturally, I could practically hear my pupils screaming in pain as they tried desperately to adjust to the sudden rush of light after four days of utter darkness. Feebly, I raised a hand to protect myself. "Ah, Wheeler, goddammit…" I said.

He ignored me. "Dis room is way too dark. It looks like hell for Chris' sake!" He stomped away from the window and looked for a light switch.

"It was my stepfather's," I told him.

I saw the back of him as he tried to squeeze behind a large dresser for a switch. "Yeah, Mokuba said dat…why would ya' wanna sleep in here after he slept here?"

I thought for a moment. Why had I? "Well, it is the largest bedroom." That was the best I could come up with. There really was no other reason that anyone but I could understand.

"So?" He asked. I chose to be deaf to this question. Squeezing back from behind the dresser, (his clothes—which I noticed were no longer his uniform, but rather some of my old clothes that were too big for me, for you see I get smaller as I get older because I eat less and less—now slightly dusty), he looked up at the ceiling. "What does dat mean?" His finger pointed to the kanji.

"You don't even want to know."

"No, I do."

"It was a saying my stepfather made up."

"What was it?"

Why does he persist? But I gave in anyway. "Never let your right eye sleep more than you left eye for then you are half a man."

Wheeler looked at me and blinked. A truly blank expression shone on his face. "Wait, what?"

I nodded. "That's what it means."

He thought this over for a minute longer and then went back to his search saying, "Was your stepfather, like, really insane?"

I looked at the floor and saw Gozaburo's face in the carpet. He was telling me to wash my hands again for literally the thirtieth time, after they were raw and slightly bloody in the worst places, because he was certain that he still saw some of the orphanage dirt on them.

"Really, really," I said.

"Doncha think dat people should have to pass some kind a' test to be able to have kids?"

I thought for a moment. "Yes, I do." Why was he telling me this? We had already talked about both our pasts, perhaps this was an afterthought? I didn't know…maybe he just gushed out things that came into his head. Probably. Yes, that sounded very much like Wheeler.

"Aha!" he exclaimed. "Found one!" Suddenly, light rained down on us from above. Again, my pupils cried out in anguish.

"Alright, Wheeler, that's quite enough light for one room."

"Yeah, ya' right, it is, isn' it?" He paused and looked at me smugly yet anticipating a reaction. When I didn't respond he said, "Well, ya' can thank me lata. Meanwhiles," Meanwhiles? I honestly never heard that used in the plural. Very odd…but so cute. I had to shift my position a little to keep from becoming aroused. "I'm gonna go on and make ya' some breakfast. Oh and doncha know? We have eggs now!"

What? Wheeler had been in my groceries? That was unacceptable…but I didn't really care that much about the eggs part of it, I cared more about how he wanted to take care of me affairs like that. I felt totally useless, helpless, like a sorry excuse for a blanket-shrouded human being. In other words, I wasn't in control, and that bothered me.

"I believe I'll assist," I said, getting up.

"NO!" Wheeler ran over to me yelling his protests. I was caught off-guard so I faltered in my movements for a second. "You are gonna stay in bed! Ya' hurt, Kaiba! You've been in a coma for four days! Come on! What the hell's wrong wit ya'?" He literally pushed me back into bed and covered me with the blanket.

"Wheeler, there is no need for this. It's fruitless, I'm fine, alright?" I loathed being told what to do. I honestly can't stand it.

"Well, let me tell you somethin', Kaiba. The only fruit that's gonna be had here is in ya' breakfast, it ain' gonna be fruit-less, ok?"

I blinked. That barely made sense. A couple of weeks ago that wouldn't have made sense to me at all, (it was only after being with Wheeler all this time that I even remotely comprehended those sentences). "What the hell are you talking about?" I asked anyway.

His chocolate eyes blinked and he said, "It don' matter. The point is, I'm gonna make ya' breakfast an' you are gonna stay ya' ass in bed, alright?"

I was just about to protest a third time, when Mokuba burst through the door holding something white and fluffy. "Seto!" he screamed. "You're awake!" His large purple eyes were stretched to their fullest, and his sheet-like black hair bounced energetically behind him as he ran to me. Immediately my body relaxed, he just had a calming effect on me. Don't all little brothers?

"Seto!" Mokuba was hugging me and squeezing me. "I was so worried about you!" Noticeably, he was upset, but not in tears. So I just hugged him back and apologized for worrying him.

I wanted so much to apologize for everything…everything that I had put him through…wait a minute, what had Wheeler told Mokuba about what happened to me?

"Seto…" Mokuba continued before I had a chance to say anything. "I'm sorry, too."

"Why, Mokuba?" What could he possible be sorry for?

"I'm sorry that you had to lie to me all these years…Joey told me what happened."

"He what?" I asked, turning angrily, (but not all that angrily, for it was hard to be mad at Wheeler), to the culprit.

With that, Wheeler just smiled one of his dumb, toothy smiles and rubbed the back of his neck saying, "Uh, heh-heh-heh, umm, yeah, about that…"

"It's ok, Seto," Mokuba reminded me, staring up into his big brother's eyes with those innocent purple orbs. "I don't care."

What did he mean he didn't care? He just found out that his brother was a mass-murderer and he doesn't care? "What?" I asked, confused.

He pulled away from me. "I mean, I do, but…not that much. Because I know why you did it, even if you don't really, and, well, there are worse reasons to kill, Seto."

Mokuba shook his head. "I understand."

If I would have known that…frustration twanged in my nerves. But then I thought: Oh well. That whole mess was over with, and Mokuba didn't even care. Why should I? But, something was just eerily out of place…Mokuba hated when I yelled at my employees, yet he didn't care that I killed people in spare time? Whatever, I mustn't tempt fate…just let it go…I couldn't.

We would have to talk later. In private. Still, I hugged him openly and said, "Thank you for it, Mokuba."

He nodded and smiled with his young smile. When he did that…sometimes I forgot how old he really was and just thought of him as a kid with some messed up life. But he was not going to be a child forever, I knew that, maybe eventually he could start caring about my past…but I should probably worry about that only when the time came.

"Is everything over now, Seto?" He asked.

I nodded solemnly. "Yes."

"Details?" Wheeler asked from his spot behind Mokuba.

I shook my head no. "Not yet, later." I was certainly not going to explain them in front of Mokuba, he already knew too much to permanently steal his innocence, and I wasn't going to add onto that fact.

My little brother became bored with a pause in the conversation, (if you were so bold as to call it a conversation), and went to the spot where he had lain the creature in his arms. I realized it was the rabbit Alice, already looking better. The fur looked like it had started to grow back in some places, and it had a healthy gleam in its eyes.

Proudly, Mokuba showed me the rabbit. "I named him Chisai. How does he look?" Chisai. It meant "small" in Japanese. It was just the kind of name that Mokuba would deem perfect for a rabbit. I half-smiled. He really could be cute.

"He looks a lot better than when he first came here, Mokuba."

"Hey, why did he come here, in the firs' place?" Wheeler asked

"My employers were going to kill him…and well…let's just say that the tables turned." I stared at them.

"Uh, righ'…" Wheeler looked away, but Mokuba seemed unchanged. "How's your shoulder, nii-sama?" he asked, almost directly after Wheeler had finished his nervous reply.

"It's perfectly fine, Mokuba. Tell this to Wheeler, would you?"

"I can hear ya' jus' fine, Kaiba. But dat doesn' mean I believe ya'." He could be so emotional. His voice rang with anger

Mokuba laughed. "He would know if you were ok, Seto. Joey's hardly left your side this whole time!"

"Is that so?" I asked. My eyes rolled to him. The heart inside me involuntarily soared through my chest. He really did care…but, oh, poor Wheeler. Mokuba had embarrassed him.

"Yeah, well, we were dat worried about ya', weren' we, Mokuba?"

Mokuba nodded but then smirked. "I was worried about Seto, but I didn't stay here whispering sweet nothings in his ear the whole time…"

At that, I stopped breathing.

"I'm gonna—.." Wheeler chased Mokuba out of the room and down the hall. I could hear them playing and talking about keeping secrets, whatever that meant.

So, Wheeler honestly had been whispering to me while I slept…that was so very, well, loveable…I felt like crying suddenly. What the hell? I swatted the air in front of me. I hadn't cried since I was a little kid. Why would I start crying now, just because Wheeler had shone love towards me? But I couldn't possibly deny how much I loved that…how much I adored his adoration.

Sometimes the simplest things are turned so extravagant in the minds of lovers.

Why had Wheeler done that? He had already admitted he loved me, (a confession I certainly wanted to inquire about later on), but did he really even mean that? Had he just said it to make me wake-up? I doubted it…was that Wheeler-like? I wasn't sure…if he had done it only for that, was the adoration while I was asleep no different? Then how could I explain his tears?

I swore that this mutt was like a benign assassin, his true motives never positive in the minds of others until he shoved a knife in your chest.

Lost in my thoughts, I barely even heard Wheeler rush back in slightly out of breath saying, "Sorry 'bout dat. Kids, ya' know?"

My head snapped up to look at him. "Yes. Mokuba can be vindictive when he wants to. He is a Kaiba."

Wheeler tilted his head to the side and looked at me with curiosity bubbling around in his chocolate eyes. In every way he resembled a blonde puppy waiting for its master to explain the sit command. "What's dat word mean? Vin…dick…tive…"

I slated my eyes in annoyance, (fake annoyance, of course). "You honestly don't know?"

He shook his head no, still resembling a puppy.

I sighed slightly, being an asshole only out of habit rather than being one because of actual contempt. Wheeler and I had this silent agreement, almost. It was like a rule. We had to be nasty…or at least, that's what I gathered…I didn't even think about the consequences if I was wrong.

"It means like cruel, nasty. Kind of how we are to each other, Wheeler."

At this, he un-tilted his head and burst out, "Right, I get it! Cool…so, dat's my new word fa' the day. Vindictive." He looked away and smiled ruefully. "Hehe…wait 'til Téa hears dis word…she's gonna freak…" The boy wasn't even mentioning my allusion. Well, it didn't really matter.

Besides, I had a new topic of interest. "Do you want to return to Yugi and his friends?"

Wheeler turned back to me with an innocent look about him. "Eh…well, I guess so. But, uh, ya' know, not yet, right?"

Interesting… "Actually, yes. The war is over, Wheeler. Officially. The people who wished to hunt you are all dead…well…most of them are, but I assure you that the ones left alive no longer have any interest in you. They've lost all taste for blood shed. So, you can leave whenever you want. There's really nothing to keep you here…" As much as I knew this was a lie, Wheeler still had me to think of, I had to say it because it would have been way too obvious if I just demanded that he stay and be with me.

Wheeler shifted uncomfortably. "Well, I was actually considerin' stayin' here…just until, ya' know, ya' get better…is dat ok?"

Every single nerve cell in my body wanted me to say, "You can stay here as long as your heart desires, my love." But of course…no. Instead I told him, "That's fine. But I already am better, Wheeler."

He jetted back to life. "No, you are not. I don' care what ya' say, you are not. Ya' need ya' rest…I'm gonna go make ya' breakfast." He turned slowly to the door again. With a final head spin around his shoulder he warned, "And you better stay in bed 'til I get back. And even den ya' stay in bed, ahright?"

I nodded dismissively. He gave me one last look of warning then turned and closed the door behind him.

As soon as I heard him walk down the stairs at the end of the hallway, I jumped out of my bed with a definitive shudder, trying to forget all thoughts of helplessness. I physically dusted myself off, hoping to catch all remnants of the last four days on my fingers and sweep them away. I needed a shower.

I stepped into my bathroom and removed the rest of what little clothes I had on and decided to check on my bullet wound before heading into the cleansing shower water, (steaming hot, just the way I liked it).

The bandages were wrapped almost painfully tight around my shoulder; it took great care to remove them without actually harming myself further. When I finally peeled off the gauze cloths, I stared into the fetid remains of a past infection. Damn, it really had gotten infected. Of course I didn't know what poison D.B. dunked her bullets in before she loaded her pistol, but I was sure that she didn't just leave them the way she bought them. It would be so like her to have to put a stamp of approval on her weapons.

The wound itself was not bleeding openly, so I had to wonder which of them, Mokuba or Wheeler, had sewn the wound shut. The bullet had entered and left me, passing straight through my shoulder, but amazingly missing all bones that might have shattered. I was able to move the arm perfectly fine, so all the tendons that were damaged in the bullet must not have been hurt very much at all. The wound was almost totally healed in four days. Either D.B. was misreading the directions on her potions recipe, or Wheeler and/or Mokuba were ready for their doctorate degrees in wound-mending. I knew that Mokuba had experience, (slight experience, that is), with taking care of such wounds, but Wheeler…I had no clue.

I attempted to touch the wound and then growled in pain at the burning sensation I felt in it. Alright, so it wasn't completely healed. But I had survived. That alone was more than enough proof that they were far beyond their years in treatment.

I stepped into the shower slowly and made every possible effort not to destroy the mending done, but gently clean it so as to prevent more infection. I also rid myself of the dried sweat that lingers on one's body after days of being asleep and any last splashes of blood, (the very few there might have been), from my handling of the Mafia.

Feeling much better, I turned off the steamy water, and began to dry myself off with the towel I brought in with me. When I was reasonably clean, I realized that I had forgotten to get clothes. Hopefully there were still clean ones in my room, for that was the next place I went to look, in the large dresser drawer, with nothing but a towel wrapped around my waist.

Shit. There was practically nothing of use in this drawer…I checked the one under it, please have something goddammit…

Suddenly the bedroom door opened with a loud creak. My head turned so fast I got whiplash, (very painful, but I ignored it with the sight of my visitor).

"See now, I didn' know if ya' wanted strawberries o' blueberries, so I kind of—WHOA!" Wheeler dropped the tray of food on the floor in his utter surprise, staining the carpet indignantly.

As you can imagine, this was not at all the idea of what I had planned for that morning. For Wheeler to see me mostly naked coming out of the shower with a skimpy towel covering the most necessary places. I was extremely embarrassed by this unexpected turn of events, any control of the situation I once had was gone, frustration and anger in its place.

But then…it was still Wheeler…whom I had been overly anxious to be completely naked with for a long time…but this was not the time or place to be thinking those thoughts, I quickly banished them with remorse and tried to compose myself as best I could.

"Kaiba! WHAT the HELL are ya'…" Wheeler had raised his hands feebly in front of his face to block my image, but I could still see the rather large blush that had crept its way without shame all across his pretty face. I wondered…

I had to pretend I saw and felt nothing. I went back to my search for clothes. "Like the view, Wheeler?" I asked.

"Dammit, Kaiba, what the HELL are ya' doin' out of bed, and, uh, like—.."

"Naked?" I asked with a smirk.

"Yeah!" He was turning from side to side, hands spread across his face like a child that caught his mother taking a bath.

"Well, I felt unclean. So I took a shower, I wasn't aware that I needed your permission for that, did I?" I turned to look at him and saw that he was peeking through a slit in between his fingers at me, (more like a teenager that caught his mother taking a bath), which he covered as soon as he saw me looking at him. I smirked again. This was fun, if a little embarrassing.

"No, but, what the hell are ya' doin' out of bed?"

"Oh, is that what had a conflict with? My standing out of bed?"

"Yeah! Dammit, Kaiba…"

End this game…no, no thank you. But I had to. "Well, just let me find some decent clothes and I'll go right back to bed, I promise." There was just nothing in these drawers. I walked across the room to the other drawer, hearing Wheeler's near whimpers of protest, was he enjoying or hating this?

"Pick up that food, Wheeler, before it permanently stains the carpet." I looked back at him, he's "covered" vision had followed me across the room, but as soon as I mentioned the food, he was on his knees picking it up and crying out, "Ah, nuts, my delicious food!"

Glory hallelujah, I found the perfect outfit in the other drawer. "Did you put nuts in the food, Wheeler?"

He was scooping the mess back onto the tray with a cupped hand, but when he heard my question, he looked up and flung the bangs out of his eyes with a fling of his head. My desire for him bounced within me, but I struggled to hide it.

As soon as he saw what was facing him, he withdrew a little bit and squeezed his eyes shut. "Sorry," he said, embarrassed.

"It's alright. I like nuts." I knew that he was certainly not mentioning the nuts when he apologized. It was just a weird sentence to guide his vision upon me again, which he did, lifting his head, brows furrowed, saying, "What?"

I had put on some boxers, so as soon as he saw me, I threw off the towel. Wheeler shrieked and moved back, but then realized I was wearing undergarments, and relaxed.

Just a little bit of sexual harassment never hurt anybody, right?

So I dressed as Wheeler cleaned up the rest of the food. I wondered if Wheeler was watching me out of the corner of his eye. He probably was. Did he wish that I was moving backwards in my movements, removing clothes? There was no way to tell, unless…well, I would not do that. No way. I was foolish to even think of such a solution.

"Has it stained the carpet, Wheeler?" I asked.

"I dunno! Why the hell would I know?" Aww…the poor puppy was slightly aggravated by my tactics?

"Well, I'm sorry, but I just thought that you would know if there was a gigantic red spot on my carpet where there was once none."

"How the hell can I tell dat? The whole carpet is red, Kaiba!"

That was true. "Any other colors that don't belong?"

"None dat I can see."

"Well, fine. Then you're lucky. Because I would have had you clean it out, not my maids."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…sure ya' would. Da one guy dat saved ya' life, sure ya' would." Wheeler stood up indignantly and brushed off his knees, (without purpose, I suppose, for my carpet was apparently spotless). He thrust the tray of hairy food into my arms without looking at me and said, "Here. Breakfast is served."

The pancakes and fruit pieces looked hazardous. Red specks of carpet stuck into the dried syrup, and the strawberries looked like miniature hearts drenched in stale blood. The blueberries were devoid of all manner and nature that would call them blueberries any longer, most of them were crushed with the tiny seeds spilling and mixing with blood from the strawberries. Any order of the food was gone, lost in Wheeler's hasty clean-up.

However. Wheeler had made this. For me. It was his handiwork, directed for my benefit. And he was right. He had saved my life. Plus, I noticed that he was stomping out of my room, trying to keep the scraps of dignity he had left. I didn't want him to leave me, just yet. I wanted to talk with him.

So I summoned the happiest, most innocent looking smirk I could and said, "This looks lovely, Wheeler."

I wasn't being sarcastic, but the blonde boy whirled around and yelled, "I don't care about ya' sarcasm, Kaiba, ahright?" He looked so hurt. My heart began to corrode with sympathy and self-hate because those looks were my fault.

"I wasn't being sarcastic." I sat down on my bed and took up the fork.

I couldn't believe it. I was actually going to eat this—this monstrosity made with real eggs with carpet fuzz stuck in the syrup, probably dangerous to my health in all possible ways?

Yes. I was going to eat it for Wheeler.

I took up the fork and carved into the side of the pancake with a soft scrape on the dish. I closed my eyes and shoved the food into my mouth with as much false enjoyment as I could muster.

It honestly didn't taste that bad. The syrup was put on perhaps a little too lavishly, making it very sweet, but the natural sourness of the smashed blueberries and strawberries neutralized that a little bit. I almost didn't even notice the hairs of carpet in it, but a little bit of tongue irritation wasn't going to kill me. In all actuality, the food wasn't as hazardous as I thought.

"Mmm…this is very good, Wheeler," I opened my eyes at him to see that he was standing there in eager anticipation of my reaction. As soon as he saw me looking, though, he quickly tried to cover it up with that of boredom, but I had enthralled him once, and we both knew it.

"Would you like some of this?" I had already eaten about three bites and felt totally stuffed. The food was just too sweet for me. "I'm full."

He sat down across from me on the other side of the bed. "Yeah, ok." So I gave him the plate and offered to go and retrieve a new fork, so he could avoid my saliva. "Nope, I don' mind ya' spit, Kaiba." And he just went on eating where I had left off.

That was…in a word…very sexy. I mean, we shared utensils…it was very kinky.

I waited for him to finish his meal, (trying not to look at him too hard and arouse suspicion), then asked, "So, what happened while I was out?"

Wheeler tossed the plate and fork on the floor, where it luckily didn't break, and flopped on his stomach on my bed. "Well…we were jus'…ya' know…tryin' to keep ya' alive." His voice was slightly muffled and his face was turned away from me. I only saw the back of his golden hair and, well, every other part of his back and…lower…

"I'm sorry," I said, for no reason other then my heart swimming around trying to reach his own and stop the corrosion I felt in its beating core.

"Hey! What are you sorry for?"

"Putting you through that." I felt around my shoulder for a while, realizing the pain my brother and Wheeler must have gone through.

"Eh…I wouldn' worry about it. I know dat if ya' had ya' choice, ya' wouldn' have passed out an' almost died, anyway. So, s'ok." He stretched his arms leisurely.

I wanted to know details of their care. "Who healed the wound in my shoulder?"

"Well, it was mostly Mokuba, ya' know…but I helped a little. Course, Mokuba has much more experience den me, but, I really wanted to help, so…"

"So Mokuba was the one that sewed it shut?" I didn't know why this was so important to me, it just was.

Wheeler's head finally turned towards me again. His chocolate eyes sparkled with amusement from an unknown source. "Nah, dat was me…I was the only one dat knew how to sew, so…"

I blinked viciously. Wheeler had sewed my arm shut. That was so…well…I can only describe the feeling of dropping in my stomach.

"You didn' even flinch. I mean, I knew it had to hurt a lot…someone sewin' ya' arm an' eveythin'…but ya' didn' even flinch o' nothin'…dat's when I started thinkin' ya' were dead."

"Why, because I was unable to sense pain in my sleep?"

"Well…yeah…" His eyes shone slightly daunted after that. "I mean, most people would of at least flinched…"

"I have a high pain tolerance."

"Really?" His ears seemed to perk up at that.

I glanced by my side. "Yes." I waited a few more moments before I added this next part, "And I also hadn't slept in about five days."

"What!" Wheeler sat straight up, staring at me in horror. "What duya' mean ya' hadn' slept in five days?"

"Well…I just don't sleep. It's that simple."

"Kaiba, people need sleep…oh my god…ya' know," He ran a skinny hand through his matted yellow locks. "I actually thought dat ya' were goin' insane for a while there, but now I see dat ya' were just deprivin' yaself of sleep. You are so stupid."

At that, I looked at him ferociously. "What do you mean by that?"

He slated his eyes then wagged a finger at me. I flinched involuntarily. "What do you mean by calling the multi-billionaire of a multi-billion dollar—.."

"Don' throw ya' stats at me, Kaiba-boy. I know dat you are a President of some fancy schmancy company and whateva', but ya' really can be dumb sometimes. I mean, what kind of idiot stops sleepin' for five days? A moron, right?"

He was just being hurtful now…not that I truly minded…he did have a slight point. But I was not going to let him onto that. "Wheeler, I will not stand to be insulted in my own home, if you please."

He looked at me skeptically. "An' what are you gonna do about it, Rich Boy? I saved ya' life, remember?"

"And, coincidentally, I saved your life. By ending the lives of others, if I might add."

"Yeah, about dat…" Wheeler moved a little closer to me as he said this: "How did dat work out? You killin' dem all, I mean."

I almost laughed. For a kid that knew almost nothing about the danger he was just in, he could be very forward. But I restrained myself and said, "Just that. I killed them all. Except one. One I left alive."

"Why dat one?"

How was I going to explain this? I wasn't even sure why I had left D.B. alive in the first place. And I still felt remorse over killing all of them…I had no reason. This was not at all the direction I wanted the conversation to go. But Wheeler had asked…and as little as he knew about the Mafia, it was safe to tell him now. He deserved it, too.

So, I began with their names. An introductory to the carnage. I ended with D.B.'s silky hair, and gasps. An antithesis to the carnage.

This whole explanation took about an hour, not very long considering the depths I had to bring him to—offering exemplary stories that I have not even explained to you, my fine reader—in order for everything to be clear. And it was. For when I finished, Wheeler just nodded. I believe it was the first time he was actually out of words.

"So now do you see what the danger actually was and why I needed to risk my life?" I figured that silence was pointless; at this point, with secrets torn open for dissection in front of him, I was almost afraid of it.

He was staring slightly glossy eyed at the floor, where the dish lay. "Yeah, I see, Kaiba."

"Any comments?" I was seriously afraid of the silence that threatened.

He looked at me with amusement written all over his face. The sudden change in him startled me. "Yeah, you're a bloody murdera dat kills people. But ya' saved my life. An' I—.." He suddenly stopped and curled his lips into themselves.

If he was going to go all the way with his insults, he would at least have to finish saying them, goddammit. "And you what, Wheeler?"

He clasped a hand against his mouth and shook his head.

"Just say it, Wheeler."

He shook his head again.

I was about to demand that he speak, when I realized the possible choices of what he might have said. Now I see. And speaking, (well, almost speaking), of that, why shouldn't I bring up Wheeler's last confession when I was passing out? It seemed as good a time as any.

"Wheeler, I'm curious. May I ask a question?" Wheeler unclasped his mouth and nodded a little. I proceeded onward. "When I came home, from my…finishing of the Mafia, I could be mistaken, but I was sure that you said you loved me." My head was curved inward on the left side inquisitively. He knew what I was asking, without my even having to say it.

He stared at me with eyes wide with utter fear. "Uh, yeah, well…about dat…" He cleared his throat and began wiggling around and fidgeting. He was clearly nervous—maybe even frightened. "I was…kind of scared about ya' passin' out, I don' really remember what I said, ya' know?" He wished I believed that.

"I just told you what you said. Now you know."

"Right…now I know…"

Would a lover confess and then deny his love? Was that proper? Did everyone do that? I wasn't sure…for the record, this was the first person since Mokuba that had actually uttered those three fatal words for me. I wasn't sure how to handle it, if they had been forced out of him by default, then why had I taken it so seriously?

And even as he was purposefully denying it, why was my heart in so much pain?

I nodded and looked away. I didn't want him to see the pain I held in my face.

Now the silence truly descended upon us. Was the conversation pretty much over? Yes. He had confirmed and denied his love, leaving me in pain, against my will. There was nothing more either of us could have said that would have made it better.

"So, I…I guess, I should, uh, clean up dis dish here…" Wheeler picked up the plate and walked slowly out of the room. At least he could pick up on the death of a conversation.

I sat on the bed for a while, trying to tell myself to get the hell over it, stop being a child that didn't get what it wanted and felt like crying. However, that was harder than I first thought…for the pain was deeper than I that, I think.

What reason could Wheeler possibly have for loving me? I was totally undeserving of him…he was like a bonfire. Radiating heat and light, warmth and good feeling, to whoever comes upon them—even enemies. A bonfire does not loose heat, nor does it evaporate until you want it to. It remains bright even in rain. People swarm around bonfires, hoping to catch some of their magical vivacity, but very few actually fall in love with them. Because a bonfire moves too much. It sways with the wind and flickers as flames do. They are not proper material for true loving.

I thought, if Wheeler is a bonfire, then what am I? Am I the wind, moving it here and there, confusing him with my actions? Am I the water that will eventually suffocate his flames? Or am I a patron of the bonfire, one of the many that come to catch some happiness, only to fall in love and receive this pain? Perhaps I was a mixture of all of these…but none of them held the true essence of his fire. Only he had that.

But that didn't stop me from longing for it. I wanted to feel his essence, himself, all over in every way. I was in love with him. I couldn't help the feelings.

Like I said before, though, in the depths of love there is only pain. You want what you can never have.

I leapt off my bed in frustration, (were situations like this always so confusing and hurtful?), and decided that the only way I could ever be free of this was when Wheeler left my home. As long as he lived here, he would just be a reminder of my useless and throbbing longing, so he must be eliminated. Exactly as I handled all my other problems in life; Wheeler just needed the same.

I would tell him tomorrow that his presence was no longer welcome in my house. He would have to leave. For good.

Where would he go? Back to that maniac that hurt him? My heart and very bones twanged in loathing for that scenario. But where else? Oh well. I forced myself to think that it was none of my business. Yet, it was…it really was. Knowing the mentality of Wheeler's father from what I knew of him, he would see everything that had happened, (exactly what had almost happened to him), as Wheeler's fault. Wheeler would be in trouble. Maybe the next day…maybe the next day he wouldn't be in school.

And the day after that? My head spun at the possibilities of Wheeler missing the second day of school after I threw him out.

I put my face in my hands. Even with the Mafia gone, I still had so many problems.

"All problems have solutions, Mr. Kaiba." Gustov's son ran around with his shotgun in my mind. No, they don't, young Gustov. Problems sometimes cannot be solved.

I spent the rest of the day in denial about everything, (the true state where I retreat when things become too much), while I worked hazily, (for I was unable to entirely concentrate), on Kaiba Corp. business. I was surprised to see that for once my company was not in a state of utter disarray with someone attempting to steal it or gain control of it. My employees had used common sense for once and done the right thing in any "tough" situations that had come up. I could almost have been proud of them if I wasn't so confused and agitated about my situations with Wheeler.

It was 11:00 at night the first time I looked at the clock. I sighed. Where had the time gone? I was hoping to be upstairs by nine, wishing to tuck Mokuba in as thanks and appreciation for what he had done for me. I also wanted to talk to him more about his feelings toward my side profession. There was something he was hiding, I knew it.

However, because of the time, Mokuba was probably sleeping by now. I sighed again. It would just have to wait…but until when? In an hour the day began that I would have to kick Wheeler out of my home. When would Mokuba speak to me again after that?

I closed my laptop sadly, deciding to go upstairs anyway and see if he was awake at all, and trudged to my little brother's room. You can imagine my shock when I opened the door as silently as possible and found no one there.

My heart stopped beating and some of the hairs on my arms and neck stood straight up. Blood ran cold. "Mokuba?" I called pointlessly. No one answered, of course. His bed had not been undone; he hadn't visited this room tonight.

My first thoughts were of D.B. She was back and she wanted her revenge. Here we go again, I thought. I would have to play all these fighting games, hope that she did not kill Mokuba or brutally mutilate him—at that a picture of Mokuba's dead, bloody, maimed body lying face down on the floor of the Office flashed through my head. I stopped breathing.

I needed to go there right now, no it could not wait. She could be murdering his young body right now, performing brutal things on him…visions passed through me like bursts of electricity in a bath tub. I didn't even bother to think of how she had gotten in the house and passed me, I just ran like a maniac to my room for my katana.

You can imagine my shock when I opened the door to my bedroom and found Mokuba perfectly fine and sitting on my bed playing with Chisai. "Mokuba?" I strangled out.

His black mop of hair bounced up and purple eyes smiled at me innocently. "Hi Seto!" His voice portrayed all effects of love and cuteness.

I burst out breath, and sat down on the floor, panting and trying to get my heart to regulate. "Mokuba…why aren't you in bed?" I asked through breaths.

"I wanted to see you, Seto. Are you ok?" He tilted his head slightly, suspicious.

"Yes, I am fine, Mokuba…just fine…" I closed my eyes and banished the horrible thoughts I had recently been bombarded with. Mokuba was fine, right in front of me…he was fine. I realized, though, that every single time something like this happened I would be cursed with thoughts of D.B. She would haunt me for the rest of my days. Stupid not to kill her. What was I thinking?

"Seto, you need to calm down some." Mokuba went back to playing with the rabbit, who seemed to be very affectionate towards Mokuba, (as far as rabbits go, I suppose).

"Yes, that's true, Mokuba." I got up off the floor and moved next to him on the bed. I did love my little brother, but in a different way then I did Wheeler, of course. Mokuba was the only family I had left after everything that happened to me over the course of my life. He stuck by me with that same innocent and loving smile, keeping my insanity in check and giving me a reason to live when there was none. He was like my life rope. My little brother.

"So what are you doing in my room? You want to talk?"

He nodded.

"About what?"

His gaze shifted from the soft white fur of the rabbit to the floor in a glazed manner. "Well…I wanted to talk about a lot of things…"

I leaned back on my hands. "Alright, name one of them."

He sighed. "I sort of do have a problem with you being an assassin, Seto." His small hands lifted Chisai into his lap for comfort.

I nodded. "Yes, I expected that. It's alright for you to be angry with me Mokuba. I won't hate you."

"No, I'm not angry…just, sort of…scared."

This I hadn't expected. "Scared?"

He nodded. "What are you scared of, Mokuba?" I sat up straight.

Mokuba's little face looked distraught. I felt horrible because once again I was the cause of that. He sighed once more and began, "You remember when you killed Gozaburo?" I said nothing nor did nothing. My blood ran cold at the mere mention of Gozaburo's name. I did not want to talk about this at all…but I needed to let him finish. "Well, I was right there when you did. Remember that, Seto?"

"Yes, I remember that, Mokuba." My voice was not as understanding as it had first been. But I couldn't help it. Mokuba's presence was one of the things I regretted most about killing my stepfather. As a result, my brother knew more than he should have. Way more.

"Well, I never forgot that day, Seto. I remember it so well…not so much what happened to Gozaburo, but…what happened to you." His gaze averted up to me. Purple eyes swam in pools of unshed tears. My heart throbbed in sympathy for my little brother. "You had this weird look in your eyes, Seto…like…crazy. You looked so happy and yet so sad as you, well, you know…pushed him…I was so scared of you, Seto…really." Some of his tears fell as he said this. I opened my arms to hug him. I wished I could take his pain away from him and steal it as my own.

He pushed his face into my chest. I felt wetness stain my shirt. He wasn't sobbing, though. He was just…it looked like leaking.

Through a muffled voice pressed against me, he said, "I didn't want that to ever happen again…I wanted you to be normal, forget about killing altogether, never let that craziness out again…but, well…you being an assassin…it just…" He cried again and stopped talking.

I hugged him tightly. This was where I had to face Mokuba with my secrets. "Mokuba," I began in a quiet big-brotherly voice. "You know why I killed Gozaburo, correct?"

His head rubbed against my shirt and made a fabric-rubbing sound as he nodded.

"Well, it was for revenge. But…I wasn't killing others for the same reason, Mokuba. I hated the deaths I brought into the world every day. And—.."

"Really?" His tear-stained face looked up at me with wide, wet eyes.

"Hai." I smirked and wiped away some of his tears with my thumb.

He did not smile. He just kept staring at me, as if trying to find out if I was telling the truth. Mokuba's eyes betrayed everything that he was feeling, all the time. He was an easy person to read, especially in tears like this.

"Mokuba…trust me when I say that killing for revenge and killing for bounty are totally different things. Trust me. The only craziness I have now is from seeing so many people die…but not from revenge, like what happened with our stepfather. Do you believe me?"

Mokuba looked at his rabbit sitting lazily next to him, falling asleep on the spot. He petted it absent-mindedly and then told me, "I believe you." Yet his voice was not that of a trusting little brother as it should have been.

"Alright." I ran a hand through his thick, feathery, midnight-black locks. "It's ok to be angry with me. And it's alright to be scared. But…" I closed my eyes. "…please don't hate me, Otōto."

Mokuba withdrew lightly from my hug. "I could never hate you, Seto…you're my big brother!" He smiled lightly. I knew that it would take some time before he would look at me innocently and smile wholly again, but I wasn't worried. I was actually more at ease now that the truth had come out. And it was not nearly as bad as I expected.

Mokuba squirmed completely out of my hug, as children do, and picked up Chisai. He wiped his face on his sleeve and said, "Aishiteru, Seto." (In English, "I love you, Seto.")

"Aishteru motto," I told him. ("I love you more.")

He flashed me an old smiled. "No you don't…" He was put in a better mood. In fact, I would even go so far as to say that he was liable to play from what he said next. "But I think you love Joey more…"

My senses halted and I felt nerves crackle with shock. "What? What are you talking about, Mokuba? Explain yourself!" I tried to frown at him, but really I felt nervous and scared that he might actually know my secret…

Mokuba smirked evilly as he did earlier that day. "When you were sleeping, you kept saying his name. You were like," Here Mokuba threw himself backwards on the bed and began thrashing his head side to side with closed eyes. "Wheeler…Wheeler…" He began to smile as he acted.

I tried unsuccessfully to suppress a blush. "I'm sure it wasn't like that, Mokuba." I looked away, knowing perfectly well that it had been exactly like that.

My little brother giggled loudly and sat up. "Yes it was…"

"No it was not."

He was grinning peevishly. "Yes it was…" he said again. But then his eyes aired a look of false romance. "And Joey would just hold your hand…saying, 'I'm right here, Seto…'" He actually had the accent down pretty well, though. I had to give him that.

I blushed harder. "Things that don't concern you, Mokuba…"

My little brother's eyes widen so much I thought they were going to burst out of their sockets. "Oh! So then it is true! I knew it!" He began dancing around my bed singing, "I knew it! I knew it!"

Humiliation rang clear through my body. I had just admitted exactly what I was fighting to deny. "No, Mokuba, that's not what I meant!" I tried to yell over his singing, but it was to no avail. I stopped eventually, realizing how childish this was.

After a few minutes of dancing, Mokuba got tired and threw himself on my water bed again, making both of us bounce considerably. "Oh, I knew it…I always knew it. Even when you were taunting him at Battle City and Duelist Kingdom, I knew you liked him. And how you never want to talk about him, but you always give him special treatment, making fun of him. I knew it."

My arms were folded defensively across my chest. Was it that obvious to others when it wasn't even understood by me? I refused to believe that.

Instead, I went for an approach to dissuade Mokuba from his beliefs. "Mokuba, have you completely lost your mind? He's another boy, for God's sake!" I had a look of disgust on my face, (which was hard to muster when thinking about Wheeler, but I did my best).

At this, Mokuba sat up and looked at my through half-lidded eyes. "Come on, Seto. I know you're gay."

I felt true embarrassment rise through my body and face, I shrank away from him. How could he possibly know? I had so many questions about my own sexuality…how could my little brother have all the answers? It made no sense. At all. It was totally ridiculous…what else did he know?

I looked at him horrified.

He remained cynical. "Come on, Seto…purple trench coat? Neat freak? The Sound of Music?" The Sound of Music had been my favorite movie since I was four-years-old. Hey, what? Some things stay with you from your childhood! Right?

I was about to deny all that, but then I thought: What's the point? Who was I trying to discourage? Mokuba or myself? It seemed to be myself.

I collapsed. My back curved downward and my face sank into my hands. I was shaking a little, with realization comes hardship, after all.

Mokuba moved closer to me and I soon felt a small hand on my back. "It's ok, Seto. I don't think any less of you!"

Partially, I lifted my head away from my hands to speak. "I know, Mokuba…it's just…this is…" Was I really going to be that much of a wimp and admit how taxing everything was on me? How detrimental these feelings were to my overall health, my lack of sleep and stress? Was I really going to admit all this to my little brother? Really? Yes, I was. "…very difficult…" There it was out. I was afraid of Mokuba's reaction…but he seemed understanding.

"Yeah, but…if I was you, I wouldn't…well, I wouldn't worry so much."

I turned on him, startling him slightly. "Why not?"

His gaze darted around the room nervously. "Well, I just wouldn't…that's all."

There was something he wasn't telling me. I was not a complete idiot. "Mokuba, tell me. Now."

My little brother rubbed the back of his neck. "I really shouldn't, Seto…I promised…I'm no squealer!"

"No one's here to make that claim, Mokuba. But I am your older brother. You have to tell me if it is relevant to the situation." I could twist him into talking by simply mentioning our relationship. Cruel? No. Just tactful.

"Well, alright, you are my nii-sama…" He looked back at me through wide eyes that were dying to tell me something. "Joey told me that he loved you, too."

I blinked. So it was true. The knowledge surprised me somewhat, but I wasn't in utter shock over it, because the mutt had told me this himself…I was just in doubt about it from his earlier denial. "He said that, Mokuba?"

He nodded. "Mmhhmm! While you were sleeping he told me. It was so cute…but he made me swear not to tell anyone, so you have to act like you didn't hear it from me, ok?"

I smiled. He really was a sweet kid. "Sure, Otōto."

"Thank you, Seto." He sighed shortly in relief and stared at the wall in deep thought.

I was confused. I once believed that the only course of action would be to kick Wheeler out of my home for good. But now that seemed cruel, a waste of time and emotion. Impossible even.

"I don't understand, Seto," my little brother interjected out of nowhere. "If you both love each other, why don't you just tell each other? Why are you playing all these silly games?"

"I don't know." Why were we? Because we were afraid of each other's feelings? Afraid of being turned down? Even then…it still made no sense. Well, then, I would have to end the games. Lay my cards on the table for him to see. Nothing worse than the pain of not knowing could be returned.

"Seto…" Mokuba said. He knew what I was thinking. I knew what he was thinking. We had that way with each other. I pulled him into another tight hug. He wasn't expecting it but he enjoyed it all the same with an eventual smile on his face.

"Did I ever tell you that you're my favorite little brother?" I smiled down on him. He had helped me realize my feelings. For that I would be ever thankful.

Mokuba seemed surprised. "No…"

"Well, you are." I ruffled his hair a little. "I'm going to try and show it more, Mokuba. How about that?"

"Sounds good to me."

We sat there for a moment longer and then I decided, "Mokuba, I think it's time for you to go to bed."

"Ok. I'm not really tired, though…" As if to betray him, a wide yawn escaped his mouth directly after he said this.

I smiled. "Come on. And take that rabbit with you." So, I half carried, half walked my little brother to his room and tucked him in bed. I told him good night and waited—under strict command—until he closed his eyes. I left as quietly as I could.

Outside in the hallway, I wondered: Which way was Wheeler's room? I had honestly never seen which guest room Mokuba had given him, and it was too late to ask my little brother now, so, I would just have to take it how I saw fit. I figured anyway that the only room with an open door would be Wheeler's. It didn't seem like him to close his doors, judging by the way he had his own room. So I traveled all the way down to the end of an unreasonably long hallway—(a place of isolation, it seemed, from the rest of the house, probably chosen by Wheeler when he was pissed off having to be here)—until I found the first open door.

Sure enough, when I looked inside, there was Wheeler, sprawled out across his bed in an undignified manner that would only depict such a mutt. One of his legs and an arm hung oddly off the side of the large bed, (too large for Wheeler). His sheets were twisted around his body confusedly, showing bare skin of legs, back and partially his chest, (as he was lying on his side). Accidentally, I noticed that the only thing he wore was a pair of old, tattered boxers. A blonde rag of hair was the only hint of head that could be seen from the view I had of him.

I froze, unable to move from that spot. Such thoughts that were passing through my mind, seeing him sleeping in such a way, bringing up feelings in me that I would have undoubtedly preferred to keep at bay. This was not the way I wanted to start my meeting with Wheeler. And why had I chosen such a time to talk with Wheeler? It was late in the night, he was already asleep.

My thoughts strayed as I stared deeply at him. What was he dreaming about? I hoped that he was having pleasant dreams…of whatever it was that Wheeler enjoyed most in life. If I could, I would have gone into his dreams as a fly on the wall…just to see what he thought about. Get into his mind, but not hurt anything. I was just so wonderfully curious about him.

I moved closer to his bed, taking my very first steps into his room. The room in which I would be spending a lot more time in future. The carpet met my socked feet and I looked at it mockingly. Did those pieces of carpet fiber even know how lucky they were to be stepped on daily by such a person as Joey?

Yes…Joey…he really wasn't a Wheeler anymore, was he?

Up close, I could see that Joey had his face tilted slightly between his hair and the pillow, leaving just enough space so he could breathe. A thick, pink tongue lolled out of his mouth as he took each breath. I smirked. Just like a dog, Joey…

Gently, (ever so gently), I reached out my hand to his face. Even more gently, (so gently it was like I barely even touched his tantalizing skin), I brushed away his blonde bangs and hooked them behind his ear. I just thought that he would be more comfortable without bangs tickling his closed eyelids.

Looking at his face now, so very close to him, I found my organs turn warm and melt into liquid. He looked so peaceful when he slept…I had seen him sleep only once before this time, but it never failed to amaze me how much of a beautiful occurrence it was. I said it before and I will say it again, (only this time I will say it with dignity and not run from the thought like a coward): He looked like an angel.

"Angel," I said, barely a whisper.

For a moment, I just stared at him with my own thoughts of, (for the first legitimate time), heaven. Was that what I felt when I stared at Joey? Heaven? Was this the thing that he found in his dreams making him smile so, even with his tongue hanging out? I blinked and contemplated this as Joey, right before my eyes, brought his tongue back in his mouth to say, "Seto…" in a low, dreamy voice.

My eyes widened and I held my breath, afraid of him opening his eyes. Was I caught? After a few moments still sleeping, I realized that this was not the case. Joey was simply dreaming about me.

I smirked. Heaven, was it? No I was wrong. I could not possibly be Joey's heaven. The idea was ridiculous.

Yet, even so…he seemed to be having pleasant dreams of me. My confidence boosted at this notion. I moved before I even thought about it. My feet seemed to walk themselves over to the other side of his bed. My body went and laid itself on his queen-sized mattress, next to his warm body. My arm wrapped itself around Joey's waist and my leg curled itself between his long skinny legs. Finally, my head rested itself on Joey's bare shoulder, roughly inhaling his entire delicious aroma in great happiness.

What did he smell like? Old, dried sweat, of course, a little bit. But the predominant smell was that of maple syrup. I know it sounds strange that a man would smell like syrup, but he really did. I was having images of Mokuba drowning my pancakes in it and saying that maple syrup was sweet and all natural, just the way I liked it. Perhaps it was some cologne he used…or maybe it was all in my mind, but I have no doubts about it. Joey really did smell like this syrup.

It smelled very nice. I normally don't have too much of a fetish for syrup or anything, (too sweet), but Joey smelled just like an angel should: heavenly.

The feel of his skin was so soft it was driving me insane…however, I noticed some light scars on his sides and back. Most likely from his father, but maybe from some gang he was once a part of. It didn't matter…I just wanted to kiss those scars away, realizing the inevitable pain they had brought to my puppy at one time.

My puppy? Yes…he was…mine…Slowly, not wanting to tear my eyes away from his body, I lowered my eyelids and drowned myself in the sensuous aroma and touch of him until I felt sleep pull my thoughts into blissful emptiness…

On the borderline of pure unconsciousness, I uncomfortably felt the warm body between my arms and legs move. My eyes wrenched open with surprise. Joey was staring at me with those large chocolaty eyes he had.

We stared at each other.

I looked into the eyes of the boy that I had killed so many people for. The eyes of a boy that had taken up all of my thoughts for days. The boy that had stolen my heart so childishly, yet so undeniably. For the first time looking deeply at them, I was not afraid. Nor was he.

There was nothing we could say to explain how we felt. By my actions and by Wheeler's lack of action, it was painstakingly obvious.

So it was with confidence that I unwrapped my arm from his waist and brought it up to his head. With a force so light, I pushed his head toward mine and locked our lips in a kiss. The kiss was delicate, as if we were afraid to break the moment for even a second. We did not exchange saliva or even move toward such things. It was merely just a brushing of lips. But the simplest of touches can sometimes spark the greatest of reactions. When we pulled away, it just took a glance in each others' eyes for permission to go on.

Like magnets, our lips smacked together passionately, crushing each other enjoyably, and tasting curiously. Joey tasted like honey, or something even sweeter, I can't describe it unless given his delicious saliva again.

I was the one who put out my tongue and licked his teeth, asking once more for permission. He opened his jaw willingly and our tongues met in a rolling tumble for dominance. I explored his mouth freely and tasted every bit of it before realizing that we both needed air.

We pulled away, Joey adding a small moan of need at the end. I looked into him deeply and said, "I love, Joey." He nodded. "I love you, too."

Words were no longer necessary.

I wrapped my arms around his body fully once more and curled my legs around his waist, pressing my arousal into his stomach. As I feathered small kisses around his face and down his neck, savoring the sweet, soft touch of his skin, he shakily unbuttoned and removed my shirt. I would have been embarrassed about the scars if he hadn't seen them countless times before.

Instead, I used this opportunity to grind our naked chests together and elicited a clear moan from his mouth. The sound of it pushed me into an even deeper pool of lust and need. My only thoughts were of calming this want that raged through my body.

Joey and I were both panting heavily, but he managed somehow to sink down on my body and slowly—tantalizingly slow—remove my pants. I gasped as he lightly brushed my erection, but sighed in the release of the captivity my pants had created.

As his head moved back up my body, he planted kisses on the scars embedded there. I squeezed my eyes shut at the euphoria that spread through me with this. He was…calming the pain of so many years…his lips were so soft, so delicious…how I loved those lips…kissing and soothing the burning emotional ache of all those scars. I tried my best to suppress a moan as I felt his hands roam around my chest and some of my back in small, fiery touches that felt so good they actually hurt. He touched every scar, not neglecting any one of them. I pushed his head downward, silently begging him to continue.

I felt his touches descend on my body again. Through all the need, I managed a small tingle of nervousness about where this was going.

"Joey…" I said, weakly, thinking that maybe we should talk about this before we actually did it, but then forgot all about talking as his fingers curled under the elastic waist of my boxers. I gasped and swore in Japanese at the unfair slowness in his removal of them.

When he finally finished with that, he sent shivers up my spine as he gently ghosted his fingers across my thighs over and over. I whimpered pitifully with need, forgetting for a moment who I actually was. He kissed them then, hearing my whimpers, and I had to bite my lips to keep from loudly vocalizing my need.

Suddenly he sat up and pushed on top of me. When we had sex, I let him dominate me only because it seemed like he was the one with more experience. However, I silently promised myself that next time it would not be so and Wheeler would be the one moaning and begging me to go harder.

After all was done, Joey lay on my chest breathing lightly and tickling my skin with his exhalations. I was petting his head and contemplating things about what we had just done and what it meant for the future. I was certainly sure of everything now, what my preference was, how I felt about Joey, and how he felt about me. I wondered excitingly where we could take our feelings for each other—I had never been in love and never been loved by someone else as much as Joey did.

"Joey," I whispered, unsure if he was asleep.

"Yeah, Seto?" Apparently not.

"That was the first time I've ever enjoyed being with someone." It was true. I was by no means a virgin, but the only things keeping from being one were odd nights of uncertainty with women whom I didn't really like that always ended with me being depressed for an unknown reason. I suddenly knew that reason.

He sat up and looked at me with those brilliant eyes. "Yeah?"

I nodded and smirked.

He smiled a wonderful smile and laid his head back down again. "I really do love ya', Seto."

I re-commenced my petting of his golden-yellow hair. "I love you too. Now sleep, Joey. I foresee a lot of explaining ahead of us."

"Yeah, me too. G'night, Seto."

"Good night, puppy."

"Hey…I'm no…puppy…" The word "puppy" was said with less force as Joey had descended into sleep once again. It had been a tiring night for him, I was sure.

I sighed and decided that I should probably sleep as well. There were perhaps hard times to come. The world doesn't readily accept people like Joey and me, I was fully aware of this. But at the moment, I just didn't care. I thought, we're in love. Isn't that all that matters?

I was wrong of course, but that night, I had no way of knowing this. Sleep came easily and was not at all plagued with nightmares. I thought that everything would work out fine…

But nothing ever works out fine in real life.

A/N: Ok, is that an evil ending? I hope not, I mean, I put lots of happiness in this chapter…oh and, my apologies, but that's all I'm writing on the lemon—Sorry, Kiddies! I am just too paranoid what with site monitoring, parental controls, and my own skills, so that's all you're going to get with this story. Yeah…and I also apologize that this was so agonizingly long…wow…the longest chapter so far! Did that bother any of you? I hope not. I didn't mean for that to happen, it just kind of did…sorry!

Anyway, thanks for all the reviews of my last chapter, I'm so glad people are actually reading, it's like amazing…please review, I love you all so very much!