I think I need you: Reprise
by Shaykreth
Rated: "M" for talking of sex and kissing, very mild though
Warnings: Just the usual shounen-ai.
Disclaimer: As usual, PoT does not belong to me. Nope.

Summary: InuKai Inui loves Kaidoh, and that's all there is to that.

It seemed like such a good idea at the time.

The results were, however, not what I expected.

Kaidoh did not seem like a very forward person to me – he never seemed that way – and that belief continued to hold true through the first year of our relationship. Kaidoh was always very shy around me, very quiet, but he was never against anything we did either, so I knew he was happy. He started to open up more, and he'd smile at me or tell me little things about his family that I don't think he'd ever told anyone before.

"My brother likes chemistry, too. Please don't talk to him."

"My father and my mother met at a car show."

I was never the type to engage myself in high school (or middle school) relationships, so I wasn't exactly sure what to expect out of Kaidoh, but I took his behavior as the normal between boyfriends (Kaidoh would never admit to that).

I would meet him for school in the morning, and then we'd go out for snacks after practice every afternoon. I'd walk him home, we'd kiss each other good night, and I would see him the next day at school.

Sitting where I am now, a second-year college student, I wonder how that was ever the normal with us.

Kaidoh squirms in my lap, he knows I'm distracted. "Sadaharu." He only calls me by my first name during sex. "What is it?"

"Nothing. Just thinking." Kisses.

"About what?"

"You."

He stops talking and reattaches himself to my neck, and I settle further into the seat, letting Kaidoh do whatever he wants. Sometimes he's a forward and active participant in foreplay, other times he's more content to let me lead things. At least he keeps me on my toes.

Kaidoh lives with me now, in a small apartment just off campus. It's comfortable and home.

We don't have sex frequently, just often enough to reassure one another that yes, we are dating. We don't depend on sex to define our relationship -- it's just a nice byproduct of sharing a bed and having hormones.

We define our relationship with …

A pinch in my side. "Sadaharu, stop wandering. Focus on me."

"I am."

"No, no you aren't." Kaidoh sits up and brushes his hair behind his ears. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I told you already. I'm just thinking."

"How can you think during .. this?" Kaidoh blushes at me. Some parts of him, even years and years later, are exactly the same. It's part of his charm and part of what makes us.

I kiss him. "We've been together three years."

"I know that." He shakes his head. "That has nothing to do with your attention span. What do you want me to do, dance?"

"No."

He makes a frustrated noise – I don't think I'm helping the situation much.

His eyes are staring out the back window, to the left of my head. "What has you so distracted tonight, Sadaharu? You never just … stop paying attention to me."

"I'm not sure."

He lays his head down on my shoulder and sighs. "Mm. Never mind then."

"Never mind what?"

Kaidoh doesn't answer, he just shifts in my lap, moving a little closer.

He's upset with me. He radiates it. He wants to know what's so important that I can't afford to spend just a bit of attention on him during, of all things, sex. He won't ask because sometimes things aren't his business (that's what he thinks, at least). He trusts me enough to tell him if something's wrong. There's nothing wrong, and I won't bother to tell him this because he won't believe me and I know that. Kaidoh is a brooder, and he's going to sit and think and think on this until he works himself into a huff, and then he won't speak to me for a week.

He does this sometimes. It's a behavior I haven't figured out yet. Sorta.

"I think …"

He looks at me.

"I think I need you."

He's quiet.

For a minute.

And two.

"I don't understand, Sadaharu."

"It's what I've been thinking about. How I think I need you." I brush his hair out of his face. "How I think I need your subtlety, and your blushes, and how I think I need your quirks. You mean everything to me. I could tell you I love you, and that I'd die for you, but you already know that, so it doesn't really matter."

He doesn't say anything.

"But I do think I need you."

He still blinks at me.

"You're like oxygen."

He kisses me, and I stop breathing.