Ok this is my first time doing a one shot kinda story so I hope it's good!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story.

Draco,

I don't know what to do anymore. You never talk to me at all. This has to me my 20th letter and still you haven't written back. Can't you understand I'm sorry! I love you so much. That night with Ron was such a mistake I had to much firewhiskey. I wake up every morning and I'm ashamed of myself. I just want to rip my face off and be someone new. Just today a couple strolled past me in the park. They were so happy. And I hated them. Do you know why? Because that used to be us. Please I beg you to remember all the happiness we shared. Remember when I was in your arms. Remember when we kissed, touched, laughed, smiled, breathed- together. I want it all back. I promise if you write me back soon I'll never even look at another guy again. I sit in my apartment most of the time and stare at the shadows. Sometimes I just want to be apart of them. Without you I just want to disappear. I just want to- not exist.

With all my love,

Hermione

Draco folded the letter back up and realized with the date that it had been two weeks since she had sent it. This was the first letter Draco had read from Hermione because before now he refused to hear from her. He wasn't sure if she was worthy to forgive. After what he walked in on he wasn't sure he could ever forgive her- but he pushed it out of his mind. The memories coming back of her and Weasley in bed- HIS bed. He threw the letter on the floor and punched a hole into the door as he walked into the hallway.

Damn her, he thought, she never loved me

Draco barked at a house elf to get him some breakfast before he set him on fire and the house elf ran away to the kitchen.

He sat at the table and all he saw in the dining room was Hermione. He stared at the table and memories of them making love on it flooded his mind. Without even thinking he got up and flipped the table over and sat in the living room. Again as he stared into the fire memories of them cuddling in front of it flashed through his mind. He shut his eyes tight to find comfort in the darkness. With his eyes shut was a place where she had never touched. Lately the darkness was a place he visited many times. Only there could he be alone. Only there could he really relax.

Admit it you're miserable without her, said a voice inside his head

"Oh what do you know", he said loudly and harshly

You need her

"That's ridiculous you idiot"

Well you're the one talking to yourself so you really aren't one to argue

"Bugger off"

Draco, Draco, Draco we both know you still love her

"Shut up!", he said hitting the couch

Just see her at least. It was a only mistake.

"Oh I suppose getting it on in my bed with the one person I despise is only a mistake"

Yell all you want. But the fact of the matter is you need to forgive and forget. This women is the love of your life and your going to let her slip through your fingers so easily you fool.

"GET OUT OF MY HEAD", Draco yelled and jumped up and opened his eyes to see a house elf cowering behind a chair with his food.

A few days later Draco sat in his study and stared at the wall. After reading Hermione's letter the more and more he wanted to be with her. But a part of him refused to think of her. But he decided to gather all her things and put it in a box and return it to her.

It's reasonable I don't want her stupid things hanging around my home, he thought

Or do you just want to see her again and kiss her, said the other voice

But Draco ignored it.

He grabbed the box and apparated outside her apartment and took the elevator to her floor. When he got there their was a police notice on the door that said for no one to enter.

He started to bang on the door- no answer

"Hermione open up"

No answer.

He tried to open the door but it wouldn't budge. He used his wand to try and open it but no use. She probably had charmed it so no intruders could get in. As he kept knocking a neighbor walked out in the hallway.

"No use going in there mate", she said pushing a button on the elevator

"What?", he said stepping away from the door

"Didn't you hear?"

Seeing the puzzlement on his face she went on.

"The girl who lived there died," she said and the elevator door opened and before she went in added, "I'm so sorry"

Draco stood there in shock. Nothing registering. Hermione dead? No...

His mind froze and his body shut down. The same sentence running in his mind...

The girl who lived there died

He dropped the box he was holding.

This had to be some joke. Draco went into action and wasn't sure what he was doing and before he knew it he was in front of Harry's house.

Draco banged on the door.

Harry opened the door with red shot eyes. In the back sitting on his couch was Ginny who was sobbing.

"No..", Draco trailed off, "It can't be true"

Draco started to tremble. But then rage filled his body.

"WHO DID IT! WHO KILLED HER!"

Harry stared sadly at him and Ginny came up beside him.

"She-she..", but before Ginny could finish she started to sob again

"Draco she killed herself", Harry said and another tear trickled down his cheek.

"No. She wouldn't do that. Not my Hermione", he said and crumbled in the doorway

"Draco do you want to come in", Harry said opening the door for him.

But Draco picked himself up and apparated back home.

What had he done? She killed herself because of him.

His eyes started to well up.

He drove the most sweetest, angelic, innocent, beautiful, smartest person he had ever known to suicide.

It's all your fault your such a beast, he thought and tears started to trickle down his face, she apologized so many times and you never even saw her.

Draco sat in his study and stared into the fire.

"WHY DID YOU DO IT! COULDN'T YOU HAVE HELD ON LONGER!", he roared throughout the silent study.

He took the chair he was sitting in and threw it across the room with all his strength.

"I'M SORRY! OK. JUST come back," he started and ended it with a whisper.

"YOU WERE ALWAYS STRONG. AND YOU DID SOMETHING SO FOOLISH! I LOVED YOU SO MUCH", he cried out into the room.

Without thinking Draco summoned a bottle in front of him.

Over and over the same line ran through his mind: It's all your fault

He wanted so badly to have her in his arms like she wrote about. Only now he wished to hear her laugh. He missed her aroma. Her touch. The sparkle in her eyes. The halo that followed her...

After Draco left Ginny decided to follow because she needed to give him something. She figured the only place he really could go was his home so she stood out there knocking until a house elf finally came.

"Where's Draco", Ginny said wiping away a tear

"Oh master doesn't wish to see anyone at the moment. He is very angry and sad," said the house elf almost closing the door in her face. But she put her foot in the door.

"Believe me this is important", she said and pushed past the little house elf.

After a bit of arguing the house elf finally showed her to his study. She knocked on the door but no answer. After several calls she opened the door.

She looked around and saw the chair he was sitting in with his back to her.

"Draco, I know how you feel right now," Ginny started, "and I know you probably think it was all your fault but there was other things wrong with Hermione. Her mother being sick and her grandmother dying had a lot to do with it I'm sure. I know you never liked me much but we had our common ground so let's go back to Harry's and remember what made Hermione so special. She would never want us all to mourn for her."

Draco hadn't made a noise.

"Draco I need to give you this. Hermione wrote it before she-she," but Ginny couldn't continue or she would start a new flow of tears, "well it's for you. It had your name on it. I couldn't open myself because I know how much Hermione hated it when people opened her mail," Ginny said trying to lighten the mood.

Getting frustrated at his silence Ginny walked towards him and shook his shoulder. But as she did it his body fell limp on the floor.

"Draco..", she said and knelt down. She felt his pulse and there was nothing.

"No.."

Ginny took a step back and almost fell but held herself up with his couch. She stood staring at his lifeless body. Silent tears fell off her chin and she just wanted to get away. All the events of today caught up to her and she felt like she was going to faint. She made her way to his desk where a bottle caught her eye.

Fin douce it said on it's label and if Ginny French served her right it meant

"Sweet Demise", she said to herself, "Poison"

And then under the poison was a letter.

To whom it may concern,

No doubt you have discovered my lifeless body. I could never live knowing I let the only person I ever loved slip through my fingers. She killed herself because I rejected her. I could never live on knowing this. So I don't want anyone to mourn because I'm not worthy. Hopefully I will see my sweet Hermione in the afterlife and I will let her know how much she truly means to me.

Draco

Ginny set the piece of parchment down and stared at Hermione's letter. She was tempted to open it but would respect her best friend's wishes for only Draco to have the letter. So before Ginny left the room she took the envelope and gave it a kiss-

You'll always be in my heart Hermione, she thought for a moment.

And then tossed the envelope into the flames.

Instantly the flames consumed the last memory of Hermione Jane Granger.

So can someone give me some feedback? I want to know if I should maybe keep up with a couple more one- shot fics? So c'mon leave a review and make me happy:)