A/N: sorry (yet again!) for my lack of updating. one word: mid-terms. blegh. thanks for all your reviews, guys. oh hey, please don't feel like you're obliged to read any of my author's notes. i got a comment about how drawn-out my author's notes can become (i can't help but agree. lol.), but please, just move straight on to the story and completely ignore these if you please. this is basically the only way i get to "talk" to people who read my fiction. i like to think that it makes it a bit more personal. but hey, ignore it if you want. i don't think i'm going to stop writing these any time soon. J

enjoy chapter ten! (excuse me for the shortness. longer chapters next time! i promise!)

featured song: Ashlee Simpson – Unreachable

CHAPTER TEN - Unreachable

I couldn't do it. It was the lunch hour and I had to get away from the noise and discord of the cafeteria. I felt so stifled and had to get out. So I found myself sitting on the grass outside, leaning against the tall trunk of an oak tree, it's twisted branches almost bare. It was fall, the days were getting colder and shorter. The solitude was perfect.

Fallen leaves drifted over my jeans, my unruly hair blowing in the chilly wind. I closed my eyes and escaped: the music blaring from my headphones became my haven.

I slowly opened my eyes and from a distance, I noticed Byron and Haley sitting on the Quad, their heads close together, sharing a moment that was supposed to be mine. Why was it so easy for him to look at her that way? How foolish was I to believe that I was the only one?

You had me crawlin so bad
Had me heels over head
You got me easy, you got me easy...

I pulled my knees up to my chin and buried my head in my arms, a silent scream resonant in my head.

So don't make me cry
Cuz this love don't feel so right
You can't push a river
You can't make me fall
...but you can make me unreachable.

I was stirred when I felt someone tugging at my headphones, trying to take them off. I raised my head and our eyes met. Byron was crouched down in front of me. We were so close, but at the same time, we were farther than we'd ever been.

"Hi." His hand brushed my hair as he pulled back and at his touch, the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach returned.

"Hi," I muttered, taking my headphones off. I held his gaze in mine, the look in his eyes telling me that he was searching for the right things to say.

"I, uh, saw you here and wanted to say hi. I guess we haven't talked in a while." He avoided my eyes and looked down on the ground, his hand pulling roughly at the grass.

"Yeah, I guess you've been kinda busy," I sighed, pushing a stray strand of hair behind my ear. "I mean, with Haley and everything." He scratched the back of his head and looked at me cautiously.

"We-We've actually been hanging out since that night we saw her at Phantom Pizza. I mean, first it was just a few phone calls, but then - I-I guess things just happened."

"Right," I said flatly. I guess "things just happened" between you and me, too. "And you're happy?" I asked quietly after a few moments of silence passed. He blinked twice, taken aback by my question.

"...Yeah, I guess so."

"Good," I said, almost in a whisper and paused. "Byron, can you tell me one thing?"

"What?" His eyes were downcast, so I slowly reached over, my hand gently tilting his head upward, forcing him to look at me.

"I want you to tell me that night at the party meant nothing to you. Tell me you didn't feel anything. Tell me that you didn't want to kiss me." Byron looked into my eyes, and for once, his expression told me nothing. He reached up and grasped my wrist, gently pulling it down.

"Charlotte - I-I'm with Haley now," he said quietly, slightly subdued. My emotions betrayed me and my eyes were brimming with tears. The last thing I wanted was for him to see me broken. I wrenched my wrist from his grasp and hastily stood up.

"Charlotte," Byron sighed. "Wait -"

"Just - Just forget it, Byron. Forget everything. I think we're done here."

I quickened my step and walked away, not looking back once.

You had me crawlin so bad
Had me heels over head
You had me easy, you had me easy.

...Too late to go back
To realize what we had
We were already beautiful