Summary: Kurogane meets someone in the woods; Fai goes to look for him.
Warnings: Warning One: I don't think there's too much swearing in this one. Good job. Warning Two: There's really only one spoiler in this. And it's not really much to spoil anything. If you haven't gotten past chapitre 40, then you won't really get the significance of the sword that Kurogane gets here. Warning Three: Out comes the KuroxFai! Full-fledged action. Okay, maybe not. But it's kind of there. Mostly there.
Disclaimers: CLAMP is god. I am a mere mortal frolicking in their world.
Legend
Don't Run
As time wore on, the warriors became increasingly aware that something was going on between Kurogane and Fai. They rarely spoke with each other, and Fai made a point to remain clear of his swordsman as often as he could. Kurogane became even more of a recluse, never acknowledging anyone's existence save for a menacing growl if someone dared speak a word toward him. His presence was more feared than ever and the warriors found themselves cowering somewhat whenever he stalked by. Fai had become quiet and somewhat despondent. He rarely engaged anyone in conversation anymore, choosing to listen rather than speak. His smiles were forced and thin and his laughter nonexistent.
Whenever the two were around each other, a dark tension could be acutely felt. It seemed that Fai had given up befriending his partner and now there was a note of discord between them. The two appeared as if they would not ever be able to work together again. The warriors all blamed Kurogane for Fai's current behavior. The swordsman was hopeless after all if not even Fai could get along with him.
Outward appearances being what they were, neither Kurogane nor Fai could erase the other from their thoughts. Kurogane kept an eye on his bowman whenever he was not paying attention, noting how the other warriors seemed to think that he was acting abnormally. They could not see that how Fai was acting was real. The talking was a façade; the quiet gazes and calculated words was how Fai should be.
Likewise, Fai noticed that the other warriors were shunning Kurogane, not that his partner minded. He noticed when they stared at the scar on his forehead and when Kurogane began wearing a plain white bandana to conceal it. He did not like that Kurogane seemed ashamed of how he looked, but he would not let himself care.
Fai was sitting on his own when he heard the call to march to another site. He would be glad to move on. Staying in that place was a continual reminder for him of his experiences with Kurogane. Because with each banished memory, came a pain so sharp it left him breathless.
The march would last not much longer than a day, and the army moved out early in the morning. The ranks were organized with the swordsmen in the front and the bowmen in the back. Fai was quite thankful that he was not forced to march next to his partner.
Night soon arrived on the soldiers and a halt was called. Fai quickly located Kurogane and evaded him, watching his partner disappear into the dark forest to the west. He probably should not be wandering off, but Fai shrugged. He was most certainly not the other's keeper.
Once away from the other soldiers, Kurogane felt himself relaxing. He hated the way Fai avoided him. He did not understand why his bowman was so distant. He definitely knew why, but he did not understand it. He wandered further into the forest, not really knowing or caring where he was; so long as he was back at the camp by dawn, he would be fine. The light had diminished to nothing, but the swordsman paid it no mind. He could still enjoy the night without having to see. He did miss the moon's presence, however. He sighed bitterly. Ever since that first night Fai had spent with him at their last camp, the moon had become a reminder of him.
He missed his partner. He had grown used to Fai's presence and soft smiles, and even those embarrassing nicknames. He had attempted not to be overtly concerned when Fai had turned on him suddenly, insisting on his hatred for him, but it had hurt. If it was what Fai wanted, however, then Kurogane would not get in his way. Kurogane clenched his fist angrily. He did not want the other man to lie, and he knew that Fai was lying about his feelings, but there was no way he could get him to admit that.
A soft footfall caught his attention and he turned to face the direction in which he had heard it, his hand shot to the hilt of his sword, prepared for attack. Before him stood a young girl dressed in a flowing violet skirt and a sleeveless azure bodice that hugged her chest. Small, intricate gold chains were attached above her waist and hung down to the band of her skirt, her pale skin shadowed behind. On her forehead she bore what appeared to be a tattoo of a thin crescent moon. Her wavy, chin length auburn hair was held in a small band that encircled her head, tiny jewels dangling from ribbons hung from it, framing her face. She met Kurogane's eyes.
"My princess must see you," she said. "Please follow me."
"Who are you?" Kurogane asked, voice quiet.
"My princess has been awaiting you," she said. "She will explain what you do not know. Please follow me."
Kurogane gave her an ambivalent look. "Why the hell would I do that?"
The girl smiled. "She called for you. You must come."
The man rolled his eyes. "Maybe another time."
"My princess must speak with you though," the girl insisted.
"Tell her I'm not interested," Kurogane grunted, turning away.
A hand on his arm stopped him. He looked back at the girl. "Do not be so obstinate. I will not allow my princess to be taken lightly. She must speak with you."
Kurogane studied the girl; he was easily twice as tall as she was, but he heard the determination in her words. If this girl was so insistent upon him talking to this princess of hers, he might as well just oblige her. He did not have anything else to do.
"Whatever," he grumbled, pulling his arm free of her grasp.
"Good," she said, almost haughtily, as if she had been patiently waiting for him to come to his proper senses. "This way." She turned and glided into the dark, moving through the brush with perfect accuracy. He followed behind her as she led him not much farther into a clearing. The moon shone brightly there, creating stark contrasts with the surrounding darkness of the forest. The girl bowed at the edge of the trees.
"He is here, my lady," she said.
"Thank you, Rika," a voice from the opposite side of the clearing.
The girl, Rika turned to Kurogane and bowed slightly before retreating into the blackness of the trees. Kurogane did not move from where he was and watched the other side of the clearing warily, wondering what kind of person would wish to see him and for what reason.
"Please come into the light," the voice said.
Kurogane frowned, but found himself doing as was requested, stepping forward into the clearing. A young woman stepped out then and Kurogane found himself retreating a pace. She wore a long violet gown of flowing material. A silver band circled her head, holding her dark hair into a curling fall that hung past her shoulders. Pinned into her hair were barrettes of the same crescent moon that the girl Rika had borne on her forehead. The moon design was also stitched into the young woman's gown at her chest in silver thread. She smiled tranquilly at Kurogane.
"You appear quite stunned, swordsman," she said.
He found himself quite speechless.
She tilted her head to an angle, smiling further. "Shall I begin our conversation then?" Upon no sound from the man in front of her, she laughed. "Well, I shall then. My name is Tomoyo. I am part of a nomadic tribe in these lands. And you are?"
Kurogane recalled that Rika had entitled her princess. It was custom among warriors, in addressing royalty, to bow. He knelt, lowering his head. "My name is Kurogane, princess."
Tomoyo frowned and glanced into the black forest around them. "Rika? Might I inquire what it is that you told him? It looks like you have convinced him that I am of enough importance as to be revered in this manner."
Rika giggled quietly from the darkness.
Tomoyo scoffed good-naturedly before turning back to Kurogane. "Please stand up, Kurogane. There is absolutely no need for you to bow to me."
Kurogane did not move. He remained silent and puzzled, watching the ground next to Tomoyo's feet. He had no idea what was going on.
Tomoyo sighed. "Well, it seems that you plan on staying where you are. I must come to you then." She moved forward and knelt onto the ground in front of him, grasping the sides of his face and tilting it up to meet her eyes. She looked sadly at him. "Why do you hide behind that bandana?"
"How do you know I'm hiding anything?" He asked in surprise.
"I can see it in your eyes," she said. "You hide many other things as well. Are you ashamed of your scar?"
Kurogane felt an embarrassed heat creep onto his cheeks. He did not want to talk about it. "I am not ashamed of it."
"Then why do you hide it?"
"I'm sick of people staring at me," he said, feeling the irritation come back to him.
"Does Fai mind it?"
Kurogane recoiled from her, staring in open astonishment. "What?"
Tomoyo looked apologetic. "I am sorry. I did not think you would react that strongly to his name."
"How do you know him?" Kurogane asked guardedly.
Tomoyo moved forward so that he was not so far from her. She met his eyes. "Do you want to ask how it is that I know him or how it is that I know how you feel for him?"
Kurogane narrowed his eyes. He did not really wish to know either.
Tomoyo looked at him sadly again. "It should not be this way." She reached out to touch the side of his face. "You must live, so that when you die, you can regret nothing."
"Princess?" Kurogane had never felt so befuddled.
"Call me Tomoyo," she waved her hand absently.
Kurogane raised an eyebrow. "Whatever."
"You must not let him continue running from you," she said sternly.
The swordsman's eyes fell, a scowl passing over his face. "He wants nothing to do with me," he mumbled.
"I do not think that you believe that," Tomoyo said. She continued when he did not respond. "He is not a coward, but he is afraid of his feelings. He has never cared for anyone other than the one that was taken from him. He still blames himself for it. He wonders that had he not cared, she would not have been sold like she was. If he allows himself any feelings for you, you might end up with a worse fate.
"You never had anyone for whom to care before," she said. "You cared for the young swordswoman you knew. She died, but it had nothing to do with you. You may fear the hurt that caring for someone causes, but you do not fear that the one you care for may be hurt because of you."
Kurogane would not look up at her. She still held him from moving away from her, but he would not look up at her. She knew too much already without seeing the truth in his eyes. "I'm just as afraid though," he mumbled peevishly, scowling at himself for sounding so childish.
"You need not be afraid," Tomoyo insisted. "I see the string that binds you together. You are so close and yet I have never seen a string so close to snapping because of the distance between you."
Kurogane looked at her then. "String?"
Tomoyo nodded. "The red string of fate. Your destinies are intertwined. It will never break, but that fact will not keep it from being damaged. It would make things harder in your future lives."
"Our destinies?" Kurogane had never heard that theory. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that no matter how much either of you want to have nothing to do with the other, you will always have to face each other," Tomoyo explained. "When you die in this life, your next will be with each other as well." She leaned closer to him, face stern. "Which is why you must not let him run from you."
"Why can't you talk him into not running?" Kurogane asked. "He might listen to you."
"I cannot convince him to tell the truth," Tomoyo said. "He listens to those he trusts. He trusts you."
"He won't talk to me," Kurogane glowered.
Tomoyo sighed. "I do not usually condone forceful interactions, but I'm afraid that he fears too much. You must make him at least listen to what you have to say. In the end, it will be his decision whether or not to truly believe in you."
"Do you think he would listen to me?" Kurogane asked.
Tomoyo smiled. "It never hurts to try."
Abject disbelief registered on Kurogane's face. "You mean this was only advice? You don't actually know?"
Tomoyo laughed merrily, clasping her hands. "Your expression is wonderful!" She looked at him seriously again. "Forgive me. I do know some things. But I cannot see whether or not he will allow himself to care again. He has free choice after all."
"Even if this 'fate' thing 'binds' us?" Kurogane asked scornfully.
"Yes," Tomoyo nodded. "Fate does not always come to pass in any particular life. It is always there, but may or may not come to fruition. It is up to the choices that we make whether or not it happens."
Kurogane frowned slightly.
"You must first believe in yourself before you can convince anyone else to believe in you," Tomoyo said. "Show him that the risk is worth it."
"How?" Kurogane asked, skeptical.
"I'm sure that you will know," Tomoyo smiled. Her expression became wistful. "You have the power of the moon in you." She reached up to his forehead and gently traced a crescent moon on his bandana with her fingertips. She looked into the surrounding forest. "Chiharu. Bring Souhi."
From the darkness emerged a girl in the same style of clothes Rika had worn. Her brown hair held up into braids on either side of her face, pinned with decorative chains, dangling gems down their lengths. The same crescent moon was on her forehead. In her hands she cradled a long sword in its scabbard, held gently and reverently. When she came up to them, she bowed low and offered it to Tomoyo. She then retreated into the dark.
Tomoyo turned back to Kurogane and held the sword out for him. "This is Souhi. It is meant for you."
"Me?" Kurogane asked uncertainly as he took the sword gingerly. He had not fought with long swords often, but this felt different in his hands.
"Yes," Tomoyo nodded. "This sword has been in my possession for some time, but no one has been able to wield it. Only today, when your army came by these woods did it call out. Do you know why it is you came here?"
Kurogane could not hide his annoyance. "I wanted to get away from the others. I don't like being around them in the first place, so if I can leave, I will."
"But the reason you came this way?" Tomoyo asked. "Did you not feel any pull whatsoever?"
Kurogane thought a moment. It was true he could have gone off in the opposite direction, but he had felt the need to go into the west bank of trees along the road. He had not dwelt upon it though as he had no reason to consider it significant.
"Souhi was calling for you," Tomoyo said. She looked into the distance behind Kurogane before looking into his eyes again. "I must leave. Fight with the power that is inside you and do not fear your emotions. They know how to guide you. You must help Fai on that path and not let him run from you. Things will happen soon that will destroy everything you once knew. At least let it not destroy the one for whom you care."
She rose and turned in the same motion and left the clearing. Kurogane leaned forward onto his hands and knees, reaching a hand out to her retreating back. He wanted to know more of what she had to say.
"Tomoyo!"
But she had disappeared.
"Fai."
Fai looked up from gazing glumly into the fire burning in front of him to his commander. He sat up a little straighter. "Sir?"
"Where's Kurogane?"
Fai sighed inwardly. "I'm afraid I don't know, sir."
The commander raised an eyebrow. "I suggest you find him."
Fai bit back his disgruntled inquiry of the reason he had to go, and simply rose. "Yes, sir."
The commander almost rolled his eyes, but turned away and left for the general's fire. Fai scowled after him. Finding Kurogane was the last thing he wanted to do. Orders were orders however. The bowman had been growing concerned that Kurogane was still in the forest, but had been attempting to ignore it. He also attempted to ignore that he was almost glad to have an excuse to ascertain that his partner was fine. He left the fire and entered the black forest approximately where he had last seen his wayward swordsman. He missed the light of the fires. In this forest, not even the moon penetrated the foliage. He had no idea how he was to find Kurogane if he could barely see the path in front of him.
He cautiously moved forward, doing his best to avoid the gnarled roots snaking across his trail. He heard a slight movement to one side and turned sharply to it. He could see light ahead, determining that a clearing lay on the other side of the trees.
"Tomoyo!"
It was Kurogane's voice. He almost rushed forward, but forced himself to slow. He should not be anxious to be finding his partner no matter in what kind of situation he was. He entered the clearing to find Kurogane seemingly frozen on his knees leaning forward on one hand, the other outstretched in front of him, a blank expression on his face. Fai noticed that a strange sword lay at Kurogane's side. He stepped forward into the clearing warily, wondering idly what had just occurred.
It must have been something important as Kurogane never moved when Fai came around to one side and knelt down to look at him. Fai cocked his head to the side, frowning at his partner, still frozen in place.
"Kuro-tan?" He ventured softly, not wanting to startle the other man.
The red-eyed swordsman blinked and looked over at Fai from the corner of his eye, dropping his hand somewhat. He turned his head completely to look Fai in the eye, not saying a word, studying his partner's face intensely.
Fai broke the contact, looking away nervously. Why did he suddenly feel self-conscious? He glanced back at Kurogane to see he was still looking at him and looked back to the ground beside them. "What…what is it?"
Suddenly a rough hand grabbed a fistful of Fai's tunic and forced him onto his back on the ground. He looked at Kurogane startled, as his partner held him still, his fist pressing against his chest the other splayed on the ground next to his shoulder, leaning over him, eyes determined.
"Why are you here?" Kurogane asked.
Fai looked away. "The…commander sent me."
"Is that the only reason?"
Fai continued to avoid looking at him. "Yes."
Kurogane growled low in his throat. "At least look at me if you're going to lie."
Fai forced himself to look back at Kurogane, anger staining his blue eyes. "There you go assuming that I'm lying again," his voice was soft and tinged with scorn.
"It's true," Kurogane said.
Fai narrowed his eyes. "You don't know."
"I won't let you run from me anymore," Kurogane snarled.
"I would still like to know how you're going to stop me," Fai said. He looked away again, up into the sky past his partner's face. He looked back at his forehead though, noticing the plain bandana the swordsman wore was no longer plain; a black crescent moon seemed to have been stained into the middle. He found himself reaching up to trace it. "What's this?"
Kurogane, somewhat confused, looked at him. "What's what?"
"You didn't even notice that there's something on your bandana?"
"I didn't even think you'd noticed I was wearing one in the first place," Kurogane snapped.
Fai scowled to himself. He had given away that he still noticed his partner. But it was too late to try and cover that up. "In any case," he continued, aiming for flippancy. "It is now decorated with a lovely crescent moon."
Kurogane's eyes went wide then. He reached up with his free hand and yanked the bandana off, staring at the moon on it. He looked back into the forest. "That's what she did," he whispered.
Fai had winced upon seeing Kurogane's scar, but looked curiously at him. "She?"
Kurogane looked back down at him. "Princess Tomoyo," he told him, albeit a little grudgingly. "She told me things are going to happen soon. And there is something that I have to do."
Fai scoffed. "You're taking advice from a fortune-teller?"
Kurogane's eyes darkened. "She's more than that."
The bowman almost found himself apologizing. It appeared that something had happened between this Princess Tomoyo and his partner, something that seemed to have affected him greatly.
Kurogane looked back into the forest in almost a longing and Fai felt a sharp pang of jealously. That was absurd though. He should not feel jealous. If Kurogane wanted to pine after someone beside himself, that would be fine. He swallowed back the cry in the back of his mind that never wanted to think of Kurogane with anyone else but him.
Kurogane looked back down at Fai, his eyes soft. "You can't run forever, you know."
Fai glanced away and huffed. "I can try."
"I don't want you to try," Kurogane said, his voice quieting.
Fai sighed heavily. He was so tired of running, but he did not know if he would be able to stop.
"Don't worry about things you can't control," Kurogane continued. "Everyone's afraid sometimes; it's unavoidable. But don't let it stop you from doing what you want."
"I don't know what I want," Fai mumbled.
"What do you think?"
"I want…I want something that I shouldn't. It would be so much worse than before. If something happened to you," Fai breathed, his eyes drifting closed. "I don't think I'd be able to get over it. Fuu-chan…it wasn't as strong with her. But you…you're different. It would break me if something happened to you because of me."
"I'm willing to take the risk," Kurogane said
"How?" Fai asked, opening his eyes again.
"Because," he said. "It would be worth it."
Fai looked into his eyes then. "Kuro-tan…"
The swordsman smiled a rare soft smile. "It's okay."
"We're…we're not supposed to form any attachments," Fai looked away again.
Kurogane snorted quietly. "Those are guidelines, not rules. I don't care."
Fai did not care either. He yearned to believe his partner's words. He did not know if he could trust him enough.
"Do you believe in me?" Kurogane asked.
"I want to believe…" Fai's voice was barely audible.
"We can make it," Kurogane said. "I know we can. I won't let it break."
Fai did not care what Kurogane was indicating with those words as long as they were true. If Kurogane could be strong, Fai would be able to be strong as well. "I hate you," he began. "I hate…I hate that you're all I can think about. I hate that you try to hide." He reached up to gently trace the scar across Kurogane's forehead and resting against the side of his face. "I hate that I can't trust you as much as you deserve. And…I hate that…I hate that I can't hate you at all."
Kurogane was silent, studying Fai's face a moment, before smirking. "You're not lying."
Fai chuckled somewhat. "No, I'm not."
A/N: So. Here we are again at the end of another chapter. This looks like it's going to be going for a while. I totally meant to get the Tomoyo scene and another quite pivotal scene done in this shot. But Tomoyo and Kuro-myu had a pretty good heart-to-heart. So I guess it's okay. The pivotal scene can happen next chapter.
I would like to thank Miss Duchessa once again for her fabulous beta job. Thank you! Also, thanks go out to Youko-san for a second beta job. Thanks!
I would like to apologize for the fluff of this chapter (I watched '10 Things I Hate About You' while writing the end. Could you tell?). Just as I thought I would never be able to write fluff again, this is what happens. Damn. Oh well. Everyone likes a little fluff now and again, right? Er…yeah. So it was fluffy and most likely a wee out of character for our dear Kuro and Fai. But if they have to be out of character in order to get happiness between them then so be it! Speaking of happiness, I hope no one hates me for building up to what would have been a kick-ass kiss just to not deliver. Remember how I said that I was bad at action scenes? Well…I'm bad at romance scenes too… But this time I didn't even attempt it. It always comes out so stinted and contrived. So frustrating. Your imaginations would do better than anything I write. But maybe the beginning of the next chapter might have something I could come up with… So I really hate the way this thing is formatted, but I can't seem to fix it. I'd like to apologize for the crappiness of its appearance.
Next chapter: You get to know what Tomoyo meant when she said, "Things will happen soon that will destroy everything you once knew." Look forward to another update (hopefully) soon!
All right. I was warned that apparently the admin here do not like 'polls' in stories. So, seeing as how I would like to keep my account, I'm taking out the word 'poll.' No really, I've got some feedback about how I should update, and I was talking it over with Youko-san (one of my beta-readers) and I think I can pull off updating every three weeks as a regular schedule. So after I get chapter five up, from that day there would be three weeks before chapter six, then from that day another three weeks before chapter seven, etc. How does that sound?
Thanks for all the reviews! Big love to you all. As always, thanks for reading!