Disclaimer: Star Wars is a registered trademark of Twentieth Century Fox and Lucasfilm, Ltd. The Creepy Burger King is a registered trademark of... well, that should be obvious.

Chapter 6

Jedi Champloo

As Kinbu and company travel back to the planet Lue to set their big example to the galaxy, the Jedi master Qui-Lex Foren stood right below their target. It just so happened, however, that he discovered was not alone in his hiding place as soon as he broke in. It turned out the room he was staying in belonged to a middle-aged Nemoidian with quite a bit of lecherous tendencies. In fact, once Qui-Lex took a closer look at the room, he saw nothing but stacks of pornography and posters with quotes like, "Dead girls don't say no," and "Any shape is the right shape for date rape." Naturally, Qui-Lex sighed at this perversion.

It has been a whole day since he came in, and he's already had enough of hiding. Maybe it was the lecherous mind the owner of this place held, maybe it was the stormtroopers above that were still searching for him, or maybe it was the strong disturbance in the Force that told him Kinbu has arrived at Burger King to destroy it, but whatever the reason was, Qui-Lex knew he had to get out of here. However, the only way he knew how to escape was to cut a hole from the ceiling with his lightsaber, and he knew that would piss off the perverse Nemoidian. Therefore, he decided to act quickly.

He gathered up as much of the stacks of porn videos as he could and made himself a staircase. He then climbed the porn staircase, activated the blue blade of his lightsaber, and began to cut through the ceiling in a circular fashion. He did this as fast as he could, as he could sense the Nemoidian heading in his direction. Without giving any second thought, he completed the circular motion with his lightsaber and cut open a large hole leading directly inside Burger King. Finally, he Force-jumped through the hole while the door opened, effectively escaping. A few minutes and a few dozen dead stormtroopers later, he began to head out the building, just as he came across two apparent customers, both with creepy smiles.

About a few minutes earlier, Kinbu, Ron, and Jack landed their stolen Imperial shuttle onto the dock leading to Burger King. When they got out of the shuttle, however, many customers began to crowd around and boo them. Naturally, this made Kinbu even more upset, and yet he couldn't help but smirk. After all, they would have the last laugh when he destroyed their favorite restaurant.

"What the hell are they booing us for?" said Ron. "We didn't do anything wrong,. did we?"

"Most likely Kinbu was being a dick," said Jack. "Wouldn't put it past him."

"Oh, shut up, you two," said Kinbu to Ron and Jack, as he said to the rest of the customers, "and get a clue, you ignorant fucks! You don't even realize that the Empire took over your planet, do you?"

"Well, we hate you more!" yelled out one of the customers.

"Besides, how do we know you're not part of this 'Empire' bullshit in the first place?" asked another customer.

"Will you all shut up and listen to me?" yelled Kinbu. "Look, I hate every single one of you, and I know you all hate me. Still, there's an evil Empire out there that is trying to deny your right to anarchy, and you're just sitting on your lazy asses eating your heart attacks on a bun! Well, wake the fuck up and let me show the Empire that nothing can control chaos!"

There were loud, angry groans throughout Kinbu's audience. To let Kinbu set his example would mean to sacrifice their favorite restaurant, and they knew it all too well. Therefore, they responded only with one finger and a simultaneous "Fuck you" to Kinbu.

"Oh, it's hopeless," said Kinbu. "Let's just blow it up anyway. If the customers don't want to stand up to scum and villainy, they deserve to die."

"Whatever you say," said Ron, "but what makes you think these people are THAT bad?"

"Yeah," replied Jack, "they seen like pretty fun people to me. I'd sure as hell like to live here... well, to each his own."

And so Kinbu and company went, pushing people out of the way until they arrived at the door. Just as Kinbu was about to come in, however, he sensed a disturbance in the Force. He then turned around and saw two Imperial carriers land near his shuttle. Kinbu knew instantly who was there, so he began to head toward their direction.

"Hey, aren't you supposed to blow up Burger King with us?" said Ron.

"You two go without me," said Kinbu. "I sense vermin, and his name is Vincent."

"Oh, I have a bad feeling about this," said Jack, "but that's just me being an attention whore. Go kick some ass, Kinbu."

"Yeah, may you be with the Force," said Ron, as he and Jack headed into the door with their backpacks hanging.

Kinbu rolled his eyes at Ron and Jack. Once he went back onto the landing dock, though, he saw Vincent, along with a couple dozen stormtroopers, emerging from their carriers. He noticed that Vincent still had a missing arm from his recent encounter with a lightsaber, and his eyes gave out the coldest of glares he had ever seen. He also held a small blaster with his remaining hand and pointed it at Kinbu's direction.

"Vincent," glared Kinbu, "I see you haven't changed a bit."

"Bite your tongue, filthy rogue," said Vincent with a tone of voice that matches perfectly with his glare. "You've done more than enough damage to my reputation already. Lord Vader will have my head, and it's all your fault."

"My fault?" said Kinbu. "You were the one who let me escape, and yet here you are, attempting to bring me back. Why must you continue to be the Empire's puppet?"

"Wrong answer, rogue!" yelled Vincent. "I'm no longer a pawn for the Empire, for I got sacked as soon as you escaped. So I herded as many stormtroopers as I could that still remained loyal to me, stole a couple of carriers, and hauled ass to where you were going. And I can guarantee you Lord Vader himself will arrive here in a matter of time to kill me, although it will be well worth it in the end."

"So you plan to kill me after all."

"Damn straight."

"In spite of Dwayne's promise?"

Vincent's eyes instantly went from a cold-hearted glare to an angry one. "Don't you dare say that name! Like I'd ever keep a promise not to kill a rogue, anyway!"

Now Kinbu gave a matching glare at Vincent. "So all that means to you is your plot for revenge. I was only trying to help you out, and yet you still plot to kill me afterwards. You're despicable. I should kill you right now."

"I'd like to see you try," snorted Vincent. "You may be strong, but I've killed rogues a lot stronger."

Kinbu finally activated his gold-bladed lightsaber due to the previous comment and marched toward Vincent. "You underestimate my power, Vincent, and I'll prove it right here and now."

"You will try," said Vincent, as he fired a few shots at Kinbu. Kinbu, however, deflected each of Vincent's shots out of harm's way.

When Ron and Jack entered the restaurant, they were much surprised to find the defending stormtroopers inside already dead. Needless to say, the rest of the customers also inside are just as shocked.

"Well, that takes care of half our fun," said Ron. "I wonder who killed them."

"I don't mean to state the obvious," said Jack, "but judging from the troops being cut in pieces, I believe it's safe to say a Jedi killed them."

"A Jedi?" said Ron with disbelief. "But surely the Empire would have killed them all off by now."

"I'm only stating what I see, you know," said Jack, just as he spotted an old man a few feet behind Ron, wearing traditional Jedi robes. "Behind you, Ron!"

Ron turned around swiftly and instinctively made a kicking motion at the old man, who in response blocked the kick with his arm. "What the? You scared the jibblies out of me!"

"Have I, now?" said the old man. "Pardon me for asking, but have you seen a man in a creepy Burger King mask heading this way?"

"You mean you know Kinbu?" said Jack. "He's heading toward the dock as we speak. Just what do you plan to do with him, anyway?"

"If you must know," responded the old man, "I'm here to talk some sense into him. Since you apparently know him, do you know what he's up to, and what he did to you?"

"Oh, he just sent us to use some sequencer charges to demolish this restaurant," said Ron. "It's to set a message for the Empire, and revenge against the so-called Luesers."

"Hey, don't give him our life story!" said Jack.

"What was I supposed to do?" asked Ron. "He's a Jedi!"

"Enough, you two," interrupted the old man. "Oh, I knew he'd do something like this. I understand the revenge part, but just how do you think blowing up a small restaurant is going to make a difference, anyway?"

"You know," said Ron, "I haven't a clue."

"Me neither," said Jack. "We just assumed he was crazy, so we decided to cut him some slack."

"Hmm... it sounds like Kinbu turned to the dark side," said the old man. "I knew it. There's no hope for him now. You should turn back while you can, and forget about his mission. You seem like natural Luesers, anyway, so you'd blend in perfectly."

Ron gave out a few tears, with Jack following suit. "That's the biggest compliment anyone has ever given us," he said.

"Thank you, old man!" cried Jack, hugging the old man tightly, then turning to the rest of the customers watching. "Guys, we wish to join your humble planet after all!"

With that said, the customers cheered Ron and Jack on. They were so happy they decided not to blow up their favorite restaurant, some of them even decided to join in and group hug Ron, Jack, and the old man.

"We love you!" said the customers repeatedly in unison, as Ron and Jack began to blush.

"Oh, you guys," said Ron. "That's enough, seriously."

"Yeah, now you're all overdoing it," said Jack. "Besides, the old man needs to kill Kinbu now, so if you wouldn't mind, please get off and let him do his business."

With that said, the customers broke their hug and came behind the old man, with Ron and Jack following suit. Afterwards, the old man waved to the crowd, then turned around and headed out the door, with the crowd following behind.

"Finally," said Ron, "we're part of the crowd!"

"And one just as crazy as us," said Jack, while they marched behind the old man to the outside world.

Meanwhile, the battle between Vincent and Kinbu continued, although it could very well be called one-sided. Vincent couldn't even get a single blow to Kinbu, as he just kept deflecting the shots with his lightsaber. He couldn't even reload, given that he only had one arm. So all he could do was fire with unstable aim at Kinbu. When he fired his last shot, however, it got deflected and hit him right in the hand, putting a hole in his palm and making him drop the blaster.

Needless to say, Vincent screamed loudly and repeatedly stated, "You bitch! You BITCH!"

Kinbu then crept up toward Vincent slowly, his lightsaber ready to strike the final blow. Before he could kill him, however, he sensed a large crowd marching toward him, and more importantly he sensed his old master, Qui-Lex Foren, apparently leading the group. The group stopped right behind the catwalk to the landing dock, as Qui-Lex went all the way to the dock and stood between Kinbu and Vincent.

"Master?" said a surprised Kinbu, as Vincent continued to cry in pain and panic.

"Kinbu," said Qui-Lex, "I should have known you'd fall to the darkness so easily."

"Darkness?" said Kinbu. "Bullshit. I'm merely doing this world a favor with my attack on the Empire."

"By blowing up a restaurant?" asked Qui-Lex. "How could THAT set an example to anything? Even your two so-called friends questioned your morals on it."

Kinbu simply glared at Qui-Lex. "You mean to tell me that you drove Ron and Jack against me?"

"I did no such thing," said Qui-Lex, "you did that yourself."

Kinbu decided to ignore that statement, seeing as how he was the one who felt betrayed. "Just why are you interfering with my goals, anyway? If you're an Imperial yourself, I will not hesitate to destroy you."

"You assume so much of me," said Qui-Lex. "For one, I merely don't agree with said goals. But what I'm really concerned about is Vincent's safety."

Vincent stood silent after hearing Qui-Lex's statement, letting out nothing but a mere "What?"

"You're kidding me," said Kinbu. "I've trained under you for three long years, and you repay me by protecting the enemy? You're a traitor, Qui-Lex! You're a cold-blooded traitor, and you know it!"

"Again, you assume too much," said Qui-Lex calmly. "I never intended to betray anyone, but to protect Vincent was his father's dying wish. I have no choice but to honor that promise."

This got Vincent's attention more seriously. "No, you couldn't have known him. My father would never get acquainted with Jedi, rogue or otherwise!"

Qui-Lex turned halfway toward Vincent, but still kept watch of Kinbu. "Vincent, no one ever told you this, but your father was a rogue himself, that is, until he became my apprentice."

"You lie!" yelled Vincent.

"How would you know?" said Qui-Lex. "He died before you were even born, and you knew next to nothing about him until this very moment. Believe me, it makes perfect sense, as you're just as reckless as he was."

"No," said Vincent, as he began to cry again. "I don't believe it. I refuse to believe it!"

"Then you are lost, Vincent," said Qui-Lex, as he turned back to Kinbu and activated his blue lightsaber. "Kinbu, I leave this choice to you. If you want to kill Vincent, you'll have to go through me as well, but I suggest you back away before it's too late for you."

"I will not back down," yelled Kinbu, creeping up toward Qui-Lex with his lightsaber at the ready. "Not when you betrayed my trust."

"So be it," said Qui-Lex, as he went up to Kinbu, their lightsabers finally began to clash.

Vincent, having stopped crying, turned away from the battling duo and called to his personal army of stormtroopers, "Shoot them both down. If he has the nerve to call my own father a rogue, he deserves to die."

And so the battle began with two dozen stormtroopers, one dozen scattered around the dock and the other circling around in their carrier, firing their blasters wildly at the dueling Qui-Lex and Kinbu. Qui-Lex, who has had more experience in the Force than Kinbu, managed to dodge most of the blasts, and while he blocked Kinbu's blows, he managed to push a couple of stormtroopers off the dock. When he wasn't blocking Kinbu, however, he deflected blasts right back to a few more stormtroopers.

Kinbu, on the other hand, relied on his array of weapons to kill off the many troops. While holding his lightsaber in one hand and a blaster in the other, he swung at Qui-Lex and took out a few troops in the process. He then Force-jumped out of Qui-Lex's way and deactivated his saber to throw a couple of thermal detonators at the rest of the scattered stormtroopers. Once he landed back on the dock, the detonators went off and destroyed almost quarter of the dock, along with the rest of the stormtroopers. Finally, he threw another thermal detonator right at the carrier and reactivated his saber. As it landed right in the middle of the ship, it went off and sank the entire ship and the troops with it.

As for Vincent, he just kneeled there, scarred from the fact that Qui-Lex and Kinbu actually stood a chance against two dozen stormtroopers. Although they themselves received minor injuries from their blasts, they continued to have their heated battle in front of him. And with his only hand too damaged to make any retaliation, all Vincent could do was cry. After all, there was no longer any hope for him and he knew it.

Meanwhile, Qui-Lex and Kinbu's duel continued. Kinbu used the smoke emitted from the thermal detonators and charred debris to hide himself from Qui-Lex. However, that didn't seem to fade Qui-Lex, as he could still use the Force to sense him coming. Therefore, Kinbu remained on the defensive until the smoke cleared. That was when he charged all out and locked his and Qui-Lex's sabers together.

"I know what you're trying to do," said Qui-Lex, "but a test of strength isn't going to work on me. Please, turn back while you still can."

After hearing this, Kinbu smirked, taking one hind off of his saber to pull out an Imperial repeater. Then, while he had Qui-Lex's saber locked, he fired many rapid shots through Qui-Lex's chest. Qui-Lex then screamed in agony, as he collapsed on his back.

"Kinbu," said Qui-Lex weakly, "I must have underestimated you."

"Honestly," replied Kinbu, showing little remorse over what he has done, "did you really think I was going for a test of strength?"

"Good point," said Qui-Lex, feeling the burning sensation in his chest. "I see there's no hope in turning you back."

"Guess not," said Kinbu, watching Qui-Lex's suffering.

"Kinbu... I beg you... don't hurt Vincent." Those were the last words Qui-Lex would ever say, as he died shortly thereafter.

Kinbu stood there for about a minute, wondering why it had to turn out the way it did. He then shrugged it off and headed straight toward Burger King, the crowd booing him much more than they ever had in the past three years.

'Don't think this is over, Vincent,' he thought to himself. 'I'll come back for you shortly.'