Woo...ok time for an apology ^_^() Uh...eheh...sorry about the first chapter. It was short and very rushed, which is not good when trying to make a first impression. I know I could have written way better, one of the reasons I had deleted it at first, but then I decided to just build on the crappy foundation I had already started with. And wow...a lot of things have changed since I wrote the first chapter, including my relationship status. I went from having a girlfriend, to not having one...and that all happened like within the first chapter, which is why it turned out pretty bad. Then I was like in a semi-relationship, then I wasn't...which happened while I started writing some of this chapter. Right now I'm in a relationship and I don't plan on changing that ^_^ With all the on and off-ness I didn't want to get into this story, but now I really do *hearts my lovely girlfriend*
Oops I almost forgot! A huuuuge thanks to all my reviewers! I love you guys ^_^ *tosses confetti on all of you*
Oh yeah...I'm changing this around quite a bit, hoping it will make it better. *hopes it will*
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ...this is so boring, I hate FFN for making this rule
***
Bra drew in a deep breath, trying to calm her racing heart. This was it...she was going to tell Pan how she really felt. She was going to take all her feelings and just let them pour out. But was Pan going to feel the same way?
Oh no, that did it. Why did she have to think about that? Why wouldn't Pan like her? She was the one who asked the question.
Trying to reassure herself didn't work at all. Bra silently wished for a can of Raid as butterflies began to flutter around in her stomach. She lifted her eyes once again to meet Pan's pleading eyes. At least that's what Bra thought they were doing...pleading for an answer. How long had she been lost in her thoughts for?
It was time to tell Pan. She had kept her in suspense long enough. Even if Pan didn't feel the same way, Bra couldn't help but feel selfish if she never told her. Pan always complained about no one ever liking her. Why should Bra continue to let her delude herself?
"Pan..." Bra started, trying to subdue a new wave of nervousness, "I...Iloveyou!"
Pan's eyes widened in shock. Could that have been the answer she was waiting to hear? Or maybe those were the words she never wanted to hear, at least not from Bra.
Bra was about to apologize, but found herself silenced by Pan's lips...
***
"BRA! GET UP NOW OR YOU'LL BE LATE FOR SCHOOL!"
Bra's eyes shot open as she fell off her bed, tangled in red blankets. Her mom really knew how to wake people up.
She rubbed her eyes sleepily with her only free hand and attempted to de-tangle herself from her blankets.
"Man...what a stupid dream. That's the third time this week that I've dreamt about Pan. I wonder if it means anything."
No, no. Of course it didn't mean anything. Girls don't like girls. Girls CAN'T like girls. It was wrong, immoral, and not to mention revolting.
After getting herself out of the blanket mess, Bra shuddered in disgust. She didn't feel anything for Pan, so why was she having dreams about them kissing? It just wasn't right.
"Maybe it's just because we've been friends for so long. Mom said she went through a phase where she thought she liked girls. Maybe I'm just going through that." Bra tried to be assuring, but somehow it still left her feeling a little insecure. Perhaps she would have to ask her friend Aki about this. She's been best friends with Suzume for as long as Bra and Pan have been friends. Maybe she has strange dreams about Suzume.
Bra checked the clock before leaving her room. She still had time to shower before school.
Bra turned on the hot water and hopped into the shower. The water felt nice and calming. Bra allowed her eyes to drift shut, but then forced them open upon seeing images from her dream.
She kissed Pan. Pan kissed her. She liked it. She wanted to be close to Pan.
No! She mentally screamed at herself. She didn't want to kiss Pan in her dream. She didn't want Pan to kiss her. She didn't like it. She didn't want to be close to Pan. It was just a stupid dream! She couldn't help the fact she felt those things in her dream. She couldn't control what she was dreaming about. It meant absolutely nothing!
Did Pan ever try to cut herself? Bra didn't think so, which led her to believe that dream was nothing more than what it was...a dream. But if that was the case, why was it haunting her so? Even more than the other dreams had?
Bra decided to just try and dismiss these thoughts from her head. This was getting too weird.
***
Bra made it through the rest of her shower and breakfast without thinking about Pan or her dream. But then it came time to walk to school with Pan. Now how was she supposed to not think about her dream or Pan when she would be right next to her?
Bra cursed her dream and headed out the door.
"Don't think. Don't think about what? Pan? No, don't think about anything...but I'm thinking right now..." Bra's thoughts were driving her crazy. Trying not to think just caused her to think even more.
"Hello Bra!" Pan smiled and waved at her best friend.
Bra stared at Pan's lips. She was wearing lip gloss, which made her lips shimmer in the light. Wait, why was she staring at Pan's lips? She was supposed to not be thinking about Pan or about the dream where she had kissed those lips...and those lips had pressed against hers...
"Bra? Earth to Bra!" Pan waved her hand in front of Bra's face, snapping Bra from the thoughts that she wasn't supposed to be thinking of.
"Oh, uh..." Bra felt her cheeks grow warm. "I'm sorry, Pan. I just zoned out I guess."
***
Pan studied Bra as they walked in silence. Bra had barely spoken to her and Pan couldn't help but think she did something wrong. She was acting really weird though. Maybe Pan didn't do anything. Maybe something happened at home. Pan decided to ask Bra later.
But then again, Bra had been a bit...distant from her for the past few days. Maybe she did something, but just didn't know it had hurt her. Or maybe Bra...
No, no, no! What a stupid thought. Bra wouldn't want to stop being friends with her. Sure Bra's other friends disliked Pan, but Bra and Pan had grown up together. They were best friends since as long as Pan could remember. Bra wouldn't let her friends' opinions affect her own opinion of Pan, would she?
Pan, too, found herself quiet and lost in her thoughts as they reached the school.
***
Bra and Pan went to their separate homerooms without even saying goodbye. Bra just hurried into her classroom to find Aki, while Pan just seemed to sulk away.
"Aki, hey!" Bra rushed up to her friend.
"Hey Bra. What's up?" Aki tossed her long, bleach-blonde hair over her shoulder and looked up at Bra with intense emerald eyes.
"I need to ask you something." Bra said, taking a seat next to Aki. "It's sort of...important, I guess." Bra lowered her voice down to a whisper, not wanting the other people in the room to hear.
"What's with the hushed tone?" Aki giggled, finding Bra's secretiveness mildly amusing.
"Aki, this is serious. You and Suzume have been friends for a really long time, right? Just like Pan and me?"
"Yeah..."
"Have you ever dreamt of her?"
"Of course. I dream about all my friends." Aki seemed oblivious to what Bra was really asking.
Bra rolled her eyes. "No, I mean...more of an intimate dream..."
"Eww, Bra! Are you trying to tell me you're a dyke?" Aki snickered.
"Aki, I'm serious. And no, I'm not a dyke. Do I look like one? I have a sense of fashion."
"So you've been having dreams about having sex with Pan? Sounds like you're a dyke to me."
"Heh...I was just joking, Aki. Like I would seriously dream about making out with Pan and having sex with her." Bra laughed nervously. She expected Aki to be a little more helpful. Bra didn't think she would make fun of her for this. But Aki made a point and Bra was no dyke.
"Hey Suzume!" Aki waved their redheaded friend over to sit with them. She shot them a smile and walked over.
"Heeey! 'Sup guys?"
"Bra was just telling me about a dream she had where she made out with Pan." Aki laughed and was soon joined by Suzume.
"Haha! Eww, gross! I never thought you'd be a lesbian, Bra!"
"Shhh! Shut up! I was just joking. Air head over here obviously can't understand what a joke is." Bra said defensively, jerking her thumb toward Aki.
Aki stopped laughing and pouted. "I'm not an air head, lesbo. You just sounded so serious."
"Well if I came in here laughing and smiling like an idiot while telling you my joke, you wouldn't have believed it. I wanted to see how you would react. Psh, come on guys. Like I would ever like another girl."
Somehow when Aki called Bra "lesbo" it stung, but she didn't know why. She knew she wasn't a lesbian. She wasn't bisexual. She felt nothing for girls. Bra felt nothing for Pan.
***
Pan sighed at her desk and blew a piece of black hair away from her face. Could Bra really want to stop being friends with her?
"Oh..." Pan moaned into her hands that now covered her face. This really couldn't be happening, could it?
Bra and Pan have been best friends forever. Bra was never one to let other people's opinions influence her. What would Pan do without her? How could she possibly live without her...
Wait a minute. She had plenty of other friends just like Bra did. Why would it matter if she and Bra stopped being friends? So what, big deal. Pan had lost friends before and got over it within a matter of days. Why should this be any different?
"Hi Pan. What's wrong?" It was Kenji, one of Pan's best guy friends.
"Mm..." was Pan's only response. She slowly took her hands away from her face and was met with a pair of pale blue eyes, which belonged to Kenji. "Nothing's wrong, Kenji. I'm perfectly fine."
Kenji folded his arms. "You don't look or sound fine to me. Seriously, Pan, what's wrong?"
Pan let out a long sigh. "It's Bra."
"Oh? What about her?"
"Well, you know how her friends don't really like me? I think they're starting to get to her...I think she doesn't want to be my friend anymore." Pan drew in a shaky breath and exhaled slowly. She tried to hold back the tears that threatened to come. She almost never cried, especially in front of her guy friends.
Kenji saw his friend struggling not to cry, kneeled down and embraced her in a tight hug. "Hey Pan, I'm sure Bra still wants to be friends with you and if not, then don't worry about it. There's no need to cry. You have tons of other friends."
"I know," Pan sobbed, failing to suppress her tears, "it's just that there's something making this whole situation feel worse than it is, but I don't really know what it is." But that was a lie. Pan knew exactly what it was. At least now she did.
"Oh come on, Pan. What could make this worse? There's really nothing to cry about."
"No, Kenji, there is something. I-I think I like Bra..."
Kenji let his arms fall from around his best girl friend's body. She didn't just say that, did she? This could definitely make things worse.
***
Eeee...I still think it sucks -_-() Well...how was it? Hopefully a lot better than what I had originally planned. Please review and tell me what you think! *gives thumbs up* Thanks so much!
Oops I almost forgot! A huuuuge thanks to all my reviewers! I love you guys ^_^ *tosses confetti on all of you*
Oh yeah...I'm changing this around quite a bit, hoping it will make it better. *hopes it will*
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ...this is so boring, I hate FFN for making this rule
***
Bra drew in a deep breath, trying to calm her racing heart. This was it...she was going to tell Pan how she really felt. She was going to take all her feelings and just let them pour out. But was Pan going to feel the same way?
Oh no, that did it. Why did she have to think about that? Why wouldn't Pan like her? She was the one who asked the question.
Trying to reassure herself didn't work at all. Bra silently wished for a can of Raid as butterflies began to flutter around in her stomach. She lifted her eyes once again to meet Pan's pleading eyes. At least that's what Bra thought they were doing...pleading for an answer. How long had she been lost in her thoughts for?
It was time to tell Pan. She had kept her in suspense long enough. Even if Pan didn't feel the same way, Bra couldn't help but feel selfish if she never told her. Pan always complained about no one ever liking her. Why should Bra continue to let her delude herself?
"Pan..." Bra started, trying to subdue a new wave of nervousness, "I...Iloveyou!"
Pan's eyes widened in shock. Could that have been the answer she was waiting to hear? Or maybe those were the words she never wanted to hear, at least not from Bra.
Bra was about to apologize, but found herself silenced by Pan's lips...
***
"BRA! GET UP NOW OR YOU'LL BE LATE FOR SCHOOL!"
Bra's eyes shot open as she fell off her bed, tangled in red blankets. Her mom really knew how to wake people up.
She rubbed her eyes sleepily with her only free hand and attempted to de-tangle herself from her blankets.
"Man...what a stupid dream. That's the third time this week that I've dreamt about Pan. I wonder if it means anything."
No, no. Of course it didn't mean anything. Girls don't like girls. Girls CAN'T like girls. It was wrong, immoral, and not to mention revolting.
After getting herself out of the blanket mess, Bra shuddered in disgust. She didn't feel anything for Pan, so why was she having dreams about them kissing? It just wasn't right.
"Maybe it's just because we've been friends for so long. Mom said she went through a phase where she thought she liked girls. Maybe I'm just going through that." Bra tried to be assuring, but somehow it still left her feeling a little insecure. Perhaps she would have to ask her friend Aki about this. She's been best friends with Suzume for as long as Bra and Pan have been friends. Maybe she has strange dreams about Suzume.
Bra checked the clock before leaving her room. She still had time to shower before school.
Bra turned on the hot water and hopped into the shower. The water felt nice and calming. Bra allowed her eyes to drift shut, but then forced them open upon seeing images from her dream.
She kissed Pan. Pan kissed her. She liked it. She wanted to be close to Pan.
No! She mentally screamed at herself. She didn't want to kiss Pan in her dream. She didn't want Pan to kiss her. She didn't like it. She didn't want to be close to Pan. It was just a stupid dream! She couldn't help the fact she felt those things in her dream. She couldn't control what she was dreaming about. It meant absolutely nothing!
Did Pan ever try to cut herself? Bra didn't think so, which led her to believe that dream was nothing more than what it was...a dream. But if that was the case, why was it haunting her so? Even more than the other dreams had?
Bra decided to just try and dismiss these thoughts from her head. This was getting too weird.
***
Bra made it through the rest of her shower and breakfast without thinking about Pan or her dream. But then it came time to walk to school with Pan. Now how was she supposed to not think about her dream or Pan when she would be right next to her?
Bra cursed her dream and headed out the door.
"Don't think. Don't think about what? Pan? No, don't think about anything...but I'm thinking right now..." Bra's thoughts were driving her crazy. Trying not to think just caused her to think even more.
"Hello Bra!" Pan smiled and waved at her best friend.
Bra stared at Pan's lips. She was wearing lip gloss, which made her lips shimmer in the light. Wait, why was she staring at Pan's lips? She was supposed to not be thinking about Pan or about the dream where she had kissed those lips...and those lips had pressed against hers...
"Bra? Earth to Bra!" Pan waved her hand in front of Bra's face, snapping Bra from the thoughts that she wasn't supposed to be thinking of.
"Oh, uh..." Bra felt her cheeks grow warm. "I'm sorry, Pan. I just zoned out I guess."
***
Pan studied Bra as they walked in silence. Bra had barely spoken to her and Pan couldn't help but think she did something wrong. She was acting really weird though. Maybe Pan didn't do anything. Maybe something happened at home. Pan decided to ask Bra later.
But then again, Bra had been a bit...distant from her for the past few days. Maybe she did something, but just didn't know it had hurt her. Or maybe Bra...
No, no, no! What a stupid thought. Bra wouldn't want to stop being friends with her. Sure Bra's other friends disliked Pan, but Bra and Pan had grown up together. They were best friends since as long as Pan could remember. Bra wouldn't let her friends' opinions affect her own opinion of Pan, would she?
Pan, too, found herself quiet and lost in her thoughts as they reached the school.
***
Bra and Pan went to their separate homerooms without even saying goodbye. Bra just hurried into her classroom to find Aki, while Pan just seemed to sulk away.
"Aki, hey!" Bra rushed up to her friend.
"Hey Bra. What's up?" Aki tossed her long, bleach-blonde hair over her shoulder and looked up at Bra with intense emerald eyes.
"I need to ask you something." Bra said, taking a seat next to Aki. "It's sort of...important, I guess." Bra lowered her voice down to a whisper, not wanting the other people in the room to hear.
"What's with the hushed tone?" Aki giggled, finding Bra's secretiveness mildly amusing.
"Aki, this is serious. You and Suzume have been friends for a really long time, right? Just like Pan and me?"
"Yeah..."
"Have you ever dreamt of her?"
"Of course. I dream about all my friends." Aki seemed oblivious to what Bra was really asking.
Bra rolled her eyes. "No, I mean...more of an intimate dream..."
"Eww, Bra! Are you trying to tell me you're a dyke?" Aki snickered.
"Aki, I'm serious. And no, I'm not a dyke. Do I look like one? I have a sense of fashion."
"So you've been having dreams about having sex with Pan? Sounds like you're a dyke to me."
"Heh...I was just joking, Aki. Like I would seriously dream about making out with Pan and having sex with her." Bra laughed nervously. She expected Aki to be a little more helpful. Bra didn't think she would make fun of her for this. But Aki made a point and Bra was no dyke.
"Hey Suzume!" Aki waved their redheaded friend over to sit with them. She shot them a smile and walked over.
"Heeey! 'Sup guys?"
"Bra was just telling me about a dream she had where she made out with Pan." Aki laughed and was soon joined by Suzume.
"Haha! Eww, gross! I never thought you'd be a lesbian, Bra!"
"Shhh! Shut up! I was just joking. Air head over here obviously can't understand what a joke is." Bra said defensively, jerking her thumb toward Aki.
Aki stopped laughing and pouted. "I'm not an air head, lesbo. You just sounded so serious."
"Well if I came in here laughing and smiling like an idiot while telling you my joke, you wouldn't have believed it. I wanted to see how you would react. Psh, come on guys. Like I would ever like another girl."
Somehow when Aki called Bra "lesbo" it stung, but she didn't know why. She knew she wasn't a lesbian. She wasn't bisexual. She felt nothing for girls. Bra felt nothing for Pan.
***
Pan sighed at her desk and blew a piece of black hair away from her face. Could Bra really want to stop being friends with her?
"Oh..." Pan moaned into her hands that now covered her face. This really couldn't be happening, could it?
Bra and Pan have been best friends forever. Bra was never one to let other people's opinions influence her. What would Pan do without her? How could she possibly live without her...
Wait a minute. She had plenty of other friends just like Bra did. Why would it matter if she and Bra stopped being friends? So what, big deal. Pan had lost friends before and got over it within a matter of days. Why should this be any different?
"Hi Pan. What's wrong?" It was Kenji, one of Pan's best guy friends.
"Mm..." was Pan's only response. She slowly took her hands away from her face and was met with a pair of pale blue eyes, which belonged to Kenji. "Nothing's wrong, Kenji. I'm perfectly fine."
Kenji folded his arms. "You don't look or sound fine to me. Seriously, Pan, what's wrong?"
Pan let out a long sigh. "It's Bra."
"Oh? What about her?"
"Well, you know how her friends don't really like me? I think they're starting to get to her...I think she doesn't want to be my friend anymore." Pan drew in a shaky breath and exhaled slowly. She tried to hold back the tears that threatened to come. She almost never cried, especially in front of her guy friends.
Kenji saw his friend struggling not to cry, kneeled down and embraced her in a tight hug. "Hey Pan, I'm sure Bra still wants to be friends with you and if not, then don't worry about it. There's no need to cry. You have tons of other friends."
"I know," Pan sobbed, failing to suppress her tears, "it's just that there's something making this whole situation feel worse than it is, but I don't really know what it is." But that was a lie. Pan knew exactly what it was. At least now she did.
"Oh come on, Pan. What could make this worse? There's really nothing to cry about."
"No, Kenji, there is something. I-I think I like Bra..."
Kenji let his arms fall from around his best girl friend's body. She didn't just say that, did she? This could definitely make things worse.
***
Eeee...I still think it sucks -_-() Well...how was it? Hopefully a lot better than what I had originally planned. Please review and tell me what you think! *gives thumbs up* Thanks so much!