Note I've given up trying to make the title in bold underline. My computer doesn't seem to want to listen to me. I also realized that within the chapters, a few of Hermione's thoughts are not italicized, and I'm sorry for any confusion. I don't think I'll do anymore italicized lines. Yargh, I hate you Macintosh and all of your basic but user-friendly functions!

Trials and Tribulations

Chapter 5

Ever since that day, both girls had avoided eye contact. Even while walking in the halls, it seemed as if they were making an effort not to come within the vicinity of each other. This silence went on for about three more days, but it tore at Hermione as if it were an eternity.

Flooded with questions, she couldn't stand not talking to Cho. Finally, she could bear it no more.

Walking straight to the west section of the school, she approached Ravenclaw tower and stopped right outside the knight. She planted herself on the ground underneath a moving portrait and pulled out a book, waiting for Cho to come out.

Student after student passed by her, not really giving her a second thought as to why she was sitting so close to their Ravenclaw entrance. The only exception was Luna, who just asked Hermione if she had read the latest issue of the Quibbler, wanting desperately to discuss the topic of exploding talking mushrooms with her.

Finally the entrance opened up and a crowd of boys was surrounding Cho as she walked by talking and laughing a fake, empty laugh.

She spotted Hermione on the ground, who had looked up from her book at that instance, and stopped, in her tracks. The boys around her immediately halted, but instead of looking at what Cho was looking at, they just stared at her.

Hermione grunted as she stood up, almost swearing one of the guys had drool dripping from their mouth, and walked right up to Cho despite the people whom she was surrounded by. Staring boldly into her hazy blue-black eyes, Hermione grabbed her arm sharply and started guiding her to a more private area that they both frequented often.

"Hermione, what's going on, what're you doing? Let me go! I…don't want to talk to you right now…" she asked as the girl continued to guide her.

Ignoring her pleas and the peculiar looks they were getting from other students, she led Cho straight to a deserted section in the library. With bookshelves enclosing them, and just the fact that it was a library, made it safe to talk without the fear of being overheard.

Both girls stopped in the corner, taking in deep breaths of air from their rather quick-paced walk, looking out through the cloudy window.

After regaining their breath, Cho stood up and calmly looked at Hermione, "What is going on?" she asked.

Dark brown eyes stared straight back into hers with a neutral gaze, "You know what is going on. I want to talk to you about what happened. We haven't spoken one bit since that incident and I want, no… need to know some answers!"

They stared at each other intensely in dead silence until Cho finally took a step back. Her delicate features twisted slightly as they formed into a small frown.

"There's…nothing I can say. I don't even have any of the answers as to why I did that myself! I'm as unsure as you are right now, so just… just… stop bugging me about it! I don't want to talk about it!" she turned around and looked intently at the dusty books on the shelf.

Silence hung in the air once more before Hermione took a step closer to Cho, who had her back turned to her.

"I think we need to talk about it. There is something obviously going on, so I suggest you start talking about what it is that you are thinking right now. Whether you like it or not, I am going to stay here, and I will constantly annoy you with my questions until I get some fine and well thought-out answers!"

Cho rested her head against the wall to her left and turned around, leaning heavily on the cool concrete,

"Fine. I'll tell you what's up. When I first met you… I didn't really care for you. You seemed like a know-it-all, when in fact, you did know quite a lot, and that upset me. Being put in Ravenclaw, we were supposed to be the smartest and wittiest, but you outdid all of us, and you were in Gryffindor. Then it turned out that you were friends with Harry. Harry Potter, 'The Boy Who Lived,' and all that stuff. I liked Harry, I really did, but I also liked Cedric..."

At the mention of Cedric's name, tears started to form in her eyes.

"…so when he died, and Harry came out with his body, I was devastated. Suddenly however, I wanted to be with Harry now, and that was very… dishonorable to Cedric's memory. Well, at least I thought I wanted to be with Harry. We had a moment in the room of requirement…"

"I saw that…" said Hermione quietly. Cho stared at her for a second, and then went on.

"…But it didn't feel right either. My feelings for both Cedric and Harry were fleeting and they didn't really last. We didn't have enough in common, or at least, they didn't understand. However, with our secret Dumbledore's Army meetings, I was watching you. Completing every single task as if it were nothing, I admired your skill. So when you asked for help with Quidditch, I felt a bit…superior for a while, teaching you things that you didn't know. I know that seems lame, but that's how I felt about it."

She looked at the ground stupidly as tears began to roll down her cheeks.

"But as the weeks went on, I realized that I was having a fun time with you. It was a different kind of fun, a more genuine feeling rather than the vacant laughs I shared with Marietta. Seeing you drop off your broom, I freaked. My heart pulsed out of control and my chest felt as if it were about to explode. I didn't know what to do! I attempted to save you and ended up hurt in the process. I figured something was wrong with my eyesight when I missed that snitch in the game. I felt ashamed once again. I felt ashamed for trying to teach you to be a seeker when I myself could not see a snitch."

Hermione took a step closer.

"Then I realized something; I would eventually never see you ever again. So when you made that tremendous catch, and I could barely see it, I felt guilty and I tried to run. I… I don't know why I kissed you though. That is something just…unexplainable. I don't know…I just don't know… Not knowing it makes me frustrated! It was a stupid thing to do, and I shouldn't have done it. I don't know why I did it. It was just idiotic. I refuse to acknowledge it…"

Pressed up against the wall, Cho felt Hermione's hand wipe away her tears, as their bodies got closer. Wrapping her arms around Cho's slender waist, she gave her a warm hug and rested her head on her shoulder.

"It's okay not to know things. Not even I know everything. I'm sorry…maybe I just… pressed you too hard…" she trailed off, tilting her head slightly upward to look at her eyes. More tears slid down her face as Cho leaned closer, slowly bringing their lips to a touch.

Her arms snaked around Hermione, pulling her closer into the kiss. Not knowing what was going on, Hermione just kept with it, because honestly, she felt nice and comforted. It was a feeling that was unique; something that not even Ron or Harry could probably give her.

Then it was over all too quickly as Cho pulled away and leaned against the wall with her back turned away from Hermione, crying more deeply than before. Silently cursing, she smashed the wall with her fists over and over again, her body shaking upon each impact.

"Cho, Cho, what's wrong? Stop that, you're hurting yourself!" Hermione grabbed her shoulder but jumped backwards as Cho lashed out violently.

"Don't touch me! GET AWAY!"

In a flurry of black and blue, Cho thrust her aside, and ran out of sight.

Sprawled on the floor, Hermione stood up and dusted her robes off shakily as she tried to process what just happened.

One moment they were kissing, then another moment, she runs away saying don't touch me. It confused Hermione again. Walking slowly to the library's exit, she tried to figure out what was wrong with Cho. She thought about the fact that she was going blind, and how frustrating it must be to not be able to see things.

Another thing was the fact that she could play Quidditch any longer due to the blindness. Quidditch was her life's passion and her ultimate hobby. That would be like giving up books to Hermione.

But the last option, was the subject that she hadn't really wanted to touch upon; the kiss. That made two times they had kissed each other without knowing what was going on. The garden…and now the library. Hermione had wanted her first kiss to be special. She hadn't even gone that far with Viktor, whom she broke up with a while ago. He kept sending her letters saying that he wanted to get back together, but she hadn't really felt like he was right for her.

With Cho however, it felt so right. She experienced feelings that she thought were supposed to be there in a relationship: comfort, warmth, love-

Wait

Love?

Hermione didn't know what Cho was feeling right now, let alone herself…love… No, there wasn't any of that in there. Or at least, not on her end yet…

Wait.

Yet?

Already at the Gryffindor common room, Hermione glanced up and found the fat lady looking down at her. "Password? I don't have all day you know, many things I have to do…important things, many important things I have to do! Like improving my singing…" she mumbled the password and trudged in.

Plopping her seemingly heavy body onto her favorite armchair by the fire, she leaned into the cushions gratefully and closed her eyes. She had too many things on her mind, what with the O.W.L. exams coming up in less than a month. Cho, yes, Cho was on her mind as well, though she didn't know why.

Everything seemed twisted. What were her feelings for her? The black-haired Ravenclaw certainly was beautiful; there was no denying that. But those are just normal feelings that friends feel for each other, or it could just be jealousy that she was more alluring than Hermione.

She shook her head and rubbed her eyes. These thoughts that she was having lately about Cho made her start to worry about a lot of things. As if the kiss wasn't enough, it only complicated matters that she enjoyed it greatly. She loved it, and as if that wasn't enough, she wanted more. Did that mean…she liked just the feeling of being with someone…or Cho?

"Hey Hermione."

Her heart leapt into her throat as Harry came walking up behind her. He sat down on the couch beside her and looked at her.

"What's wrong?"

She looked at him astonished. Shaking her head, she avoided eye contact, "What… what are you talking about? Nothing is wrong, don't worry."

She cringed slightly at that last sentence. It was the same thing that Cho always told her when something was wrong, but she didn't want to tell her about it. Harry didn't buy it one bit. He leaned in a bit closer, still talking with a serious tone.

"Something most definitely is up. Otherwise you wouldn't have red circles around your eyes." She gasped.

Red circles? She had been crying this whole time and she hadn't even realized it. Chuckling sadly she stared into the fireplace.

"Okay…you caught me. Something… might be wrong. Just a little thing, I'm not sure yet…" she paused silently. A risky scheme was developing in her mind that might help her clear up some confusion, but it also could send the wrong message. Deciding to chance it, she looked at Harry.

"Um… Harry… I was wondering if… maybe…you know, since you are one of my friends that if I could… do something real quick."

He stared at her, his face growing more and more red by the second as she advanced upon him. Leaning back into the support of the couch, he nodded his head hesitantly, waiting for what she was planning.

At the beginning when she first came to Hogwarts and met Harry, Hermione thought that she had met the perfect friend, and the greatest guy besides Ron. He did seem to have a knack for trouble, but he was always loyal and friendly; she thought she had a crush on him.

So what she was doing now, she would have thought impossible back then. Leaning in and closing her eyes, she brushed her lips upon his. He jumped in shock, but he succumbed to the feeling and closed his eyes as well, even going as far as wrapping his arms loosely around her back.

Shutting her eyes tighter, she tried to bring back that feel of excitement and euphoria that she felt with Cho, however, it did not ever come. That sweeping feel of bliss and elation never came. The whole thing just felt… dull, even empty.

This isn't right!

She pushed away fiercely and staggered backwards, shaking her head vehemently. "No! This… it's… I'm sorry, but I don't like you Harry. I was just trying to figure out something for myself. And it's just… not right. At least with you anyways."

Turning around, her cloak swirled behind her as she made a mad, and embarrassed, dash to the girl's dormitory.

Harry sat there on the couch unfazed. He never said he had liked her, but it seemed like she had that impression or something.

"Wow mate, seems like you got lucky tonight, eh?"

Harry cocked his head and looked at Ron, who had just walked into the common room, and did not laugh, nor did he even smile.

"I don't like her, and she doesn't like me. That was just… well, I'm not sure. She wanted to know something, so I just said go ahead. It's not like there was anything deeper to it."

Ron just smiled and took a seat near Harry, pulling out a chessboard. "Want to play a round of chess?"

Meanwhile, lay in her bed crying into her pillow, muffled sobs emitting from her choked throat. The other girls who were in there already had attempted to console her, but she didn't respond to any of their pep talks or questions.

Something was sorely wrong with the kiss with Harry. She previously had a crush on him years ago, so she thought it would have resurfaced maybe just a little bit, but nothing happened. It felt so lifeless, and just… plain. Nothing ecstatic or wonderful about it; just a neutral experience.

It differed so much from the lively and vibrant kiss she shared with Cho, the electric feeling of their bodies so close as they shared more than just their friendship. It had…well, feeling to it. She wanted to just stare into those obscure black-blue eyes forever, and she craved more. She didn't just desire it, she needed it.

Nothing was wrong now because she figured out what she didn't know, and that was her feelings.