December 2nd

My new friends and I have been talking in the Owlery a lot lately about the Slytherins and Hermione Granger. The Slytherins are awful. They tease me about being ugly and not having a boyfriend. The last time they did that, my old boyfriend was killed. Now the Slytherins are doing it again. I hope they don't know our secret. I hope they aren't trying to get me to tell secrets about Harry so they can hurt him like they hurt my old boyfriend.

Annie thinks I should do something about the Slytherins once and for all. Not just for Harry, but for me. She said it's about time I stood up for myself and did something about being treated badly. Mary and Suzy thought that was the worst idea they ever heard. They said it would ruin everything. They said that I should just put up with the Slytherins until Harry and I didn't have to be a secret anymore. They talked about how romantic it would be when Harry finally got even with the Slytherins for me and then kissed me in front of the whole school. He would be a hero and I would be his girlfriend and everyone would know it. They might even write a story about it in Witch Weekly. Mary and Suzy think I should be more concerned about losing a stone or two than getting rid of Slytherins.

Bella was really quiet during the whole argument. She didn't talk until everyone was all talked out, but when she did talk she made a lot of sense. She said that if Harry really loves me, it won't matter to him if I lose weight or not. Then she said that, so far, the Slytherins have just been mean with their mouths. They haven't been dangerous to me. As long as I'm a good girlfriend and don't tell any secrets, they shouldn't be dangerous to Harry either. At least no more than usual, and Harry has never had any trouble handling them before.

The person that Bella is upset with is Hermione Granger. She says that Hermione is supposed to do something about the Slytherins when they tease people because she's Head Girl and that's her job. Bella's right. We all think so. Hermione Granger is not a very good Head Girl. She doesn't do her job. All she does is study and nag Harry. Even Mary and Suzy don't see anything wrong with teaching Hermione Granger a lesson she won't soon forget. Of course, we couldn't agree on what that lesson should be at first.

Annie thought that we should hurt her, Mary and Suzy thought that we should embarrass her, and Bella thought that I should talk to her. We took a vote and Mary and Suzy won. Even Bella agreed that Hermione might start doing her job better if she knew what it felt like to be embarrassed. We are going to embarrass Hermione Granger and it's going to be fun. We're going to meet at the Owlery again tomorrow to come up with a plan.

Thank goodness for Bella. At least there was one seemingly sane person in the village of idiots that existed in Miss Tilly's head.

Severus reflected seriously on that sarcastic thought. Bella was thoughtful and reasonable. He reminded himself that Bella was not, in fact, another person, but rather a dimension of Hyacinth Tilly. The part of her that was still rational and sane. Bella's observations were, for the most part, spot on. She even qualified Missy Tilly's imaginary relationship with Potter by saying "if".

"She said that if Harry really loves me, it won't matter to him if I lost weight or not."

Miss Tilly said that Bella made sense. So we know that, at least in December, she was still listening to reason.

Severus ran his hands through his hair and blew a long breath through his lips. If he was going to figure out what Dumbledore wanted him to know from this diary, he wasn't going to have to figure out one adolescent girl; he was going to have to figure out five. He knew he was out of his depth. He was an expert on the workings of herbs and magic, not adolescent psychology. It was a popular misconception that Legilimens were experts in the workings of the human mind. In fact the opposite was true. When you know everything about a person's mind simply by entering it, you didn't bother with the inexact and complicated matters of psychology and personality.

Miss Tilly was dead and her "friends" never existed. There were no eyes to look into, no minds to probe. All he had was a book of her thoughts, and her interpretation of the events of the past months. From that, he had to determine why Miss Tilly tried to kill Hermione, what potion was in her system, how it got there, and why a simple restraining spell killed her. He had one day to figure it all out or he would be spending the rest of his days in Azkaban. Severus snorted at the irony of it all. He had outwitted the Dark Lord and the likes of Lucius Malfoy, only to be done in by and eighteen-year-old girl with no particular talent.

Severus returned his attention to the task at hand. He felt it was important to note that in December, Miss Tilly only sought to embarrass Hermione, not kill her. Something must have happened after December to turn Hermione from an annoyance to a threat. He read on.

December 6th

I did it! I did it! I did it! Hermione Granger is completely humiliated. Here's what happened. I did it!!!!!

A few nights ago my friends and I met in the Owlery to talk about how we would embarrass Hermione Granger. Mary and Suzy kept saying that we should find a potion to make her hair fall out, or that we should charm all of her clothes off so she would be naked in the middle of the great hall right in the middle of dinner. Annie got mad at Mary and Suzy for being stupid. She said that Hermione Granger was used to looking bad and that making her look worse probably wouldn't embarrass her much. Then she said that they were stupid because they didn't remember that there were spells on the castle that disabled all of the best mischief charms. She read that in Hogwarts, A History. Annie said that if we were going to embarrass Hermione with a charm, we would have to come up with something original, that the castle wouldn't turn off.

Bella said that Hermione was very proud of being the smartest witch in the school. If we really wanted to embarrass her we should do something to make her look stupid in front of the entire school. We all agreed, even Annie, that this was the very best idea, but we couldn't think of a plan. We were going to meet again to try to come up with something really good.

We didn't have to. The next day, in potions, the perfect opportunity just popped right up. We were brewing an Aging Draught and Professor Snape must have said about a hundred times that we had to add the ingredients in order or something really bad would happen. He even made us repeat the ingredients in order, twice. He said that only a dunderhead would make a mistake on this potion and he looked right at Neville Longbottom when he said it.

That's when I knew what to do. Professor Snape was keeping his eyes on the Slytherins and Hermione was paying attention to Neville. Everyone else was paying attention to their cauldrons; luckily no one sits at the table with me. When I was sure no one would see what I was doing, I levitated some lacewing flies into Hermione's cauldron.

All hell broke loose. Her cauldron started putting out a ton of smoke. Professor Snape cast a spell right away that made her cauldron and all of the smoke disappear. He did it so fast that no one breathed in any of the smoke but Hermione and Neville. I'm really glad he did that because it wouldn't have been embarrassing for Hermione if everyone were too hurt to see what happened.

And you wouldn't believe what happened! Hermione and Neville got old right in front of everyone. And I'm not saying older; I'm saying OLD. Gray hair, wrinkles, everything. The Slytherins were quiet at first, but then they started laughing. Hermione looked at her hands and then felt her face and her hair and started to cry. I didn't get to see anything else because Professor Snape sent us all to our common rooms and took Hermione and Neville to the hospital wing.

That was two days' ago, and no one has seen Hermione or Neville since. I guess she's too EMBARRASSED to show her face. Her old, wrinkled, made a stupid dunderhead mistake in potions, face.

Annie and I are happy because now everyone thinks Hermione is a dunderhead, and Mary and Suzy are happy because she looks really, really ugly. Everyone is happy except Bella. She thinks that we went overboard and that Harry would be very upset if he found out. She's probably right, but I know she won't tell my secret. She's a good friend.

Severus felt his blood begin to boil.

That bitch. That ignorant, stupid bitch. She could have killed us all. Hermione and Neville spent two weeks in the hospital wing, not because they were embarrassed, but because they were on the brink of death. Adding the lacewing flies early converted the essential elements of the potion from a liquid to a gas. Hermione and Neville inhaled enough to do them serious harm. If it weren't for the emergency Port Key to the hospital wing that he kept in his pocket at all times, they would have died of old age within two minutes.

He remembered pacing the hospital wing as Madam Pomfrey worked frantically on Hermione and Neville. He was furious with Hermione for making such an idiotic mistake. He remembered wondering how Hermione Granger could be capable of such idiocy. Longbottom? Absolutely. Granger? Never. It had to be Longbottom's doing. Granger was simply incapable of that level of incompetence. He remembered being furious with himself for leaving the supervision of a moron like Longbottom to a mere student, even a student as bright as Granger. He remembered being furious with whoever thought it was a great idea to put Slytherins and Gryffindors together in the same room with volatile ingredients. His anger knew no bounds that day.

It took a half an hour of continuously dosing Hermione and Longbottom with antidote before they were able to even stop the aging process. Madam Pomfrey spent the next two weeks treating the diseases of old age that both students contracted and dosing them with more antidote. They were very lucky to be returned to their original states, more or less.

Severus always thought that Hermione looked older, more wizened, after the incident; though he didn't know if it was an after effect of the potion or the result of yet another traumatic life experience. She looked older to him than her eighteen years. She didn't look like a girl; she looked like a woman -- an intelligent woman whose eyes had seen too much and yet still retained a spark of youthful idealism.

Perhaps that, he considered, was the beginning of his fall.

Hermione stayed at Hogwarts over Christmas break to catch up on the work she missed while she recovered in the hospital wing. Severus recalled the hours they spent together in the lab; he always knew she was bright, but it was during their private tutoring sessions that he learned how gifted she truly was. It was immediately clear to him that the seventh year curriculum was far below her abilities, and he offered her an opportunity. He would give her full marks for the year if she could learn to brew Wolfsbane Potion properly. She enthusiastically took him up on the offer.

Was that the beginning? he wondered. Did he fall when he realized that she could be his intellectual equal?

Severus recalled taking her small hands in his own and instructing her in the precise method of chopping Asphodel that the potion required. He remembered the smell of her hair as he looked over her shoulder while she diligently worked on the complicated potion. He could still feel her body trembling as he leaned in and spoke instructions in her ear.

Miss Granger? Yes, Professor Snape.

Her eyes met his and he couldn't help himself. He accessed her thoughts and found that she wasn't trembling in fear; she was trembling because his voice and his mind stirred something in her. In that moment she didn't see him as a greasy git; she saw a man.

Hermione? Severus.

That, he was certain was the beginning. He took her face in his hands and kissed her. Gently at first, and then more forcefully…hungrily…when she responded with enthusiasm. A need -- an overwhelming need -- he hadn't felt since he was a young man, took over his body and his mind. Nothing else mattered except sharing himself with this wonderful woman who had developed right before his eyes, but he never truly saw until that moment.

He carried her to his chambers…to his bed… and completed the job that the potion accident had started. He knew what he was doing was wrong and he didn't care. He gave up his entire life to atone for his sins. He risked his life daily to serve with people who held him in open contempt. If he could find a moments peace in this girl's -- no, woman's arms, he was going to take it.

With a forceful thrust, he took her virginity and what remained of her youth. The only pleasure she experienced in their first encounter was the pleasure of knowing that he desired her, and that pained him deeply. There was so much she needed to learn about her own body and his, and he would surely teach her.

And that, Severus knew, was the beginning of the end.