I'm going to be perfectly frank right now; this story was inspired by the various "I hate this character/I'm going to kill them off" stories that I see here. Themajority of them (in the Pokemon category) are, much to my dismay, the "Tracey dies" kind of story (yes, I like him. Deal with it). I figured it would be fun to let the Pokemon cast deal with this sort of animosity (via hate mail sent to them). So I present this lovely little gem, for you to read, review, and enjoy. All flames will be read once and pretty much ignored from there on in.

"HOLY HELL!"

Ah, the sweet sound of someone who's at the end of their rope. One too many hate mails, just filling up your mailbox; especially the uncreative and grammatically challenged kind of hate mail. Unfortunately, this is not only a reality for our young friends, but a daily, never going to give up even after you're dead reality.

Welcome to the apartment of whom else but our beloved Pokemon cast. Wait a minute, you ask; they ALL live in the same apartment? That doesn't make sense! Oh it makes perfect sense. This apartment is in New York. Have you seen what the landlords demand for rent?

No wonder people get married for convenience. They need their spouse's half of the rent.

Anyway back to our friends. It's just another day for them. Opening up hate mail of the written and electronic kind has become a most despised ritual. Let's check up on them.

Oh look! There's Ash with Pikachu, staring at his computer screen. What does it say this time?

"YOU SUCK! YOU'RE AN IDIOT!"

And over there in the corner is Misty. What's she reading this time?

"YOU SUCK! YOU'RE A BITCH!"

Uh……….What about Brock?

"YOU SUCK! HOW COME YOUR EYES NEVER OPEN?"

May?

"YOU SUCK! YOU'RE A NASTY SLUT!"

Max?

"YOU SUCK! I HATE NERDS!"

…………………Dare I ask? Tracey?

"YOU SUCK! YOU REPLACED BROCK!"

Do I even want to ask about what poor Team Rocket is reading at the moment?

"YOU SUCK! BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH"

…………….Curses and bad phrases start to look all the same after a while. The poor guys don't even see the words anymore; they sort of zone out after the first 50 letters, as evident by their glazed eyes and drool slowly dripping from their mouths.

Clunk!

Oh boy. In his stupor, Pikachu has fallen off of Ash's shoulder. Again. He's used to that too.

"DON'T YOU PEOPLE HAVE JOBS OR SOMETHING? LEAVE ME ALONE!"

That was Tracey's utterance this time. He sits slumped in his chair, trying to understand the people who send him all this stuff. He is right about one thing; most of the people sending him stuff don't have jobs. That's because a majority of them are minors and the U.S. has those pesky laws that state you have to be a certain age and have papers to have a job.

It is understandable why he is frustrated. He is perhaps the most lampooned of all the Pokemon cast. Something about being overweight (supposedly as "fans" have stated) and replacing Brock on the show and a whole bunch of otherwise asinine, over analytical comments and blah blah blah blah.

Oops. The hate is starting to look all the same again.

What's this? It looks like Jessie is unplugging her computer. And dragging it to the window. And………………throwing it out the window. Uh……….I'm sure no one is passing by.

CRUNCH! SPLATTER! GORE!

Oops. I was wrong.

"Guys, we have to end this. I can't take it anymore! These people seem to have nothing else better to do" cries May, as she sits frustrated at her computer.

"Why do they hate me so?" whimpers her little brother.

"Why do they ask such stupid questions?" asks Brock.

"Why is it that every fan fiction ends with 'Tracey dies' and it's always some horrible, bloody death?" asks Tracey.

"We're cartoon characters for god's sake; they act like our every action is going to affect the world!" screams James.

Uh oh. It looks like another vein is going to pop in Jessie's head. Meowth notices this.

"I'll go get the Neosporin" he says and walks off to the bathroom.

So they sit there and think. What to do? Besides commit mass murder, I mean. That would impede on their careers. Or maybe it wouldn't; sometimes you get lucky.

"How much do you think it would cost to get me out of jail for killing a few loyal "fans" Cassidy?" asks Butch.

"Too much" she replies.

"Damn."

"That's it! We do not have to tolerate this endless crap! And I know exactly how to stop it!" shouts Ash, rising from his chair.

"We don't to have to take it?" asks May.

"You know how to stop it?" Misty dryly says.

"Yes. I know exactly what to do" he replies, grinning evilly.

"That's great. Will it actually work?" queries Brock.

"Let's just say it won't be a permanent solution………but it will make us feel better" says Ash.

"Is this impending doom that I feel right now?" asks Tracey.

"You're feeling it too?" says Cassidy.

CRASH! A rock has been thrown thru their window. James goes over to read the paper attached. What does the note say this time?

"Michael Jackson is not guilty!"

Another rock soon follows, smacking poor James in the head.

"Sorry, wrong window!"

"I'll go get the broom" says Max.

"Well………at least that one wasn't meant for us" comments Jessie.

Ash rushes up to the window, obviously fuming.

"Hey! Next time make sure you got the right window, you moron!" he screams.

"Hey, you're that Ash kid! You suck!" shouts the passerby.

"Help me, I can't feel my legs!" shouts the person who got hit by Jessie's computer.

"Anyway," says Ash, as he walks back to the group, "I have a plan. It's simple and we won't get caught."

I'm starting to feel that impending doom myself. What does Ash have up his sleeve? Let's just hope it's not too……..messy.