Wilson was gone by the time House woke up the next morning, but he had left House with a lot to think about. As House went about his morning ritual his mind was racing. He had been so preoccupied with Stacy's return that he hadn't really spent much time with Cuddy.
His mind wandered back to that night, just before Vogler left. He hadn't really intended to make love to her that night. At least he didn't think so. But then, why had he gone there? He told himself it was to talk, but he was having a hard time believing that was the only reason.
It was too early to be thinking this hard. He poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down to some Coltrane. He closed his eyes after popping a few Vicodin.
Why had Stacy come back? He had gotten used to his life since she left. It wasn't perfect, but he liked it well enough, and things with Cuddy were just starting to get interesting.
He had known Cuddy for years. Next to Wilson, she was his closest friend. He knew her better than he had ever known Stacy. Cuddy was there with him through his infarction, misdiagnosis and surgery, and more importantly, recovery. She even stuck by him while he blamed her for what went wrong. She promised him she would take care of him, and she always had. He'd never fully appreciated all she'd done for him.
Could she really be in love with him? He'd denied it for so long. He didn't want to believe it because then he would have to think about how he felt about her. That was not something he was ready for.
He drove himself to work in a daze. He tried to think of anything but the lovely Dr. Lisa Cuddy. He tried to remember if he'd paid all his bills this month. Did he balance his checkbook? Did he need anything at the grocery store? The answers came as soon as the questions were asked. Yes, yes, no. They really didn't cause enough of a distraction. He tried thinking of anything else, but nothing came.
He was happy to arrive at the hospital. Patients always made great diversions. For the first time in his life he was a little sorry he didn't have clinic duty today. That would have taken his mind off Cuddy. Or would it have given him ample reason to be around her? House shook off the thought. He wasn't in love with Lisa Cuddy. He didn't fall in love. It was just a friendship, with some great perks now and then.
House entered the hospital glancing around nervously. As much as he enjoyed his confrontations with Cuddy, he wasn't ready to face her this early in the morning. He wasn't thinking clearly yet, and he might let something slip. It might be interesting to see her reaction to his knowing she loved him, but he wasn't ready to handle it.
He knew he would have to face her eventually, but he was going to put it off as long as possible. He needed time to prepare. Cuddy wasn't the type of person one could just jump into a conversation with. She was a challenge. She could also read him pretty easily by now, and would know something was up.
He made it to the safety of his office. He thought of closing the blinds, but that would be a dead giveaway that he was hiding in his office. He decided instead to play it cool, and just duck out of sight every time he heard footsteps approaching.
Cuddy did not make an appearance that morning, and House was relieved when lunchtime came and Wilson suggested they eat outside. They grabbed some hotdogs and soda from the street vendor and sat on a bench just outside the hospital grounds.
"Have you seen Cuddy?" Wilson asked, pushing his hotdog into his mouth.
"Not yet." House tried to seem casual, but there was a slight edge in his voice.
"Well, she's in a foul mood. I'd steer clear if I were you."
"I have every intention of avoiding her like the plague."
"Good man." Wilson's mouth was full, but he managed to get the words out anyway.
"Did she say anything to you?" House was too curious to let it pass. Wilson had brought up the subject for a reason and House wanted to know what it was.
"Yeah," Wilson put down the hotdog and opted for some soda. He took a big gulp before finishing his sentence. He knew it was driving House nuts. "She knows you're avoiding her, and she asked if I knew why?"
"What did you tell her?" House couldn't help himself. He sounded like a high school boy with a crush. He hoped Wilson was too involved in his hotdog to really notice.
"I said I didn't know. But it's only a matter of time before she figures it out. Don't tell her what I told you." The high school style conversation was continuing. House felt nauseous. Even in high school he hadn't sounded this pathetic.
House spent the rest of the day hiding in his office. He made several mad dives under his desk or behind file cabinets, and by the end of the day he'd taken over twice his usual Vicodin dosage. The pain in his leg was killing him from all this subversion.
Cuddy had paged him several times, but she knew he wouldn't answer. She'd even passed by his office a few times. She had to know he was in there, because he wasn't as stealthy as he used to be. She hesitated once, like she was going to come in, but she was stopped by Cameron. House wasn't sure whether he was relieved or disappointed.
House wasn't paying attention, so he nearly jumped out of his chair when he heard Cameron's voice. "Dr. House? Is everything OK?"
House looked up, trying to pretend he hadn't just been scared half to death. He popped a couple of Vicodin. "Never better." He replied.
"You know you can talk to me…" Cameron went on, but House didn't hear it. He was looking past her now. Cuddy was standing in the doorway, and House couldn't focus on anything else. She was biting her lip and looking at him in that sweet girl way she had when she was thinking about something pleasant. It was driving him nuts.
"I'm sorry," Cuddy interrupted. "I really need to see Dr. House before he leaves for the day." Cameron looked at her with distain. House was in need of Cameron's comfort and her gentile shoulder to cry on, and Dr. Cuddy comes in wanting to talk business. Couldn't she see he was hurting?
Cameron took one last look at House, didn't notice he wasn't looking back, and left the room. She would just have to comfort him another day. She could wait. It was only a matter of time before he realized he loved her.
Once Cameron was gone, Cuddy came and stood by House's desk. "You OK?" She was concerned about him for many reasons, the biggest being he seemed to be slipping into old habits with the return of Stacy, and she worried for both him mental and physical wellbeing.
Here we go again, House thought. First Cameron and now Cuddy. Pretty soon he would be beating women off with a stick. House didn't want another lecture about Stacy. Especially not from Cuddy. "Stacy's back. Big deal. Why did you invite her to stay if you thought I couldn't handle it?"
Cuddy looked surprised, and disappointed. "So this is about Stacy." She was hoping there was something else going on, anything else. The idea of House pinning after another woman was heartbreaking. House was better than that.
"This is NOT about Stacy. Why does everything think everything is about Stacy? She's not the second coming you know."
Cuddy didn't know what to say next. She had really only come to see him because she'd missed him. She was used to seeing him at least once a day, having a little banter, and staring into his ocean blue eyes. As she thought this, she realized she was staring at them right now, and hoped he hadn't noticed. She quickly looked away.
House had noticed her eyes on his, and he felt a slight disappointment when she looked away. He needed to break the tension between them. It was the wrong kind of tension. It wasn't the usual energy that sparked between them. It was something uncomfortable and unknown. He didn't like it one bit.
He needed something to say. Something that would make her laugh. She had a nice laugh. He thought to himself to get a grip. He wasn't a schoolboy. This was ridiculous. Then he had an idea. "If you came here to jump my bones, just remember that the blinds are open." He smiled at her, and put his hand over the one she had resting on his desk.
She smiled, and House felt a warm fuzzy run through his body. Damn! He thought. I am a love sick schoolboy.
"I thought you liked an audience." She moved closer to him, and leaned against his side of the desk, her leg was touching his, and he could feel the heat of her body.
"I would like to be your audience." He responded, pulling her toward him. He could feel his appreciating rising in his pants. He didn't care if the blinds were open. He wanted her right now.
If House needed another reason to hate Dr. Chase, other than his being the one who sided with Vogler, then he had just got it. Chase pushed through the door, his head in a file. When he looked up, he was stopped dead in his tracks. Although Cuddy and House had tried to pull away quickly, Chase looked up enough to catch the gist of what was going on.
"I…uh…" He was at a loss for words. "I can come back." He spun around so quickly he almost fell over. These were the last two people he wanted to get in trouble with. He would just pretend he saw nothing, and never speak of it to anyone.
Cuddy and House looked at each other. "Is he going to tell the others?" Cuddy asked nervously.
"He is a snitch." House was still not over Chase's previous betrayal, but when he saw the look of fear in Cuddy's face, he had to give her some hope. "I don't think so, though. He knows he's on my bad list, and I don't think he is the type to push his luck."
Cuddy got up to leave. That was too close a call. House grabbed her arm, not ready to let her get away that easily. "Need a ride home?" He asked. He knew she had a car, and could easily drive herself home.
"Yes." She knew he was offering a lot more than just a ride home.
It was a short walk to his car. One of the perks of his condition was the handicapped parking space. Although he did not like thinking of himself as handicapped, it did offer him certain privileges that he took full advantage of.
"Nice car." She hadn't seen his Mustang up close, and was impressed. It was in remarkable condition.
"Thank you." House eased into the car, trying to look cool, despite the terrible pain it was causing his leg.
"I should probably make you return it. It is not hospital policy to accept bribes." She was smiling as she said it, but House wondered if she wasn't serious. It was hard to tell with her sometimes. She was a stickler for hospital policy, but not so much when it came to him.
"Well, is it against hospital policy to accept this?" His hand slid behind her head and he pulled her toward him until their lips were touching. He kissed her. It was a long, soft kiss. It didn't have the urgency of a first kiss, but it held all the promise of more to come.
When Cuddy finally pulled away she was smiling. "I think I can make an exception." She put her hand on his leg and looked into his eyes. They seemed to be making a non-verbal agreement. So many things were going through her mind, but they would have to wait. There was something important she had wanted to talk about with House, but that, too, would have to wait. This was not the time to tell him she thought he needed professional help.
House shifted the car into gear and made his way out of the garage. "Your place or mine?"
"Mine." The top was down in the car. The cool breeze felt good against her skin. They drove to her house in silent anticipation.