-Romen
Disclaimer: Ain't me, T'weren't mine, never T'will be mine.
7. The Fight
Sawyer lunged at Boone, his hands reaching for his throat. Just in time, Kate swung her suitcase to the side. It made contact with Sawyer's head, which was so hard that Kate fall back onto Boone, who fell back onto Shannon, who fell back onto Locke, who fell back onto Jin, who flung the screwdriver that he was holding. The screwdriver hit Sayid in the head, and he knocked his head against Jack.
Before long, they were all going for each other.
Shannon flexed her fingers, letting out a high-pitched cackle. She grabbed Sawyer's cheeks with her deadly GOD, pinching up skin.
"How does that feel, you red-neck slime-bag?"
"Ow!" Sawyer cried, trying to push her away. He fell back onto Sayid, who was ducking Kate's suitcase. Kate had swung just a moment ago, and now she hit Shannon in the head.
"She's my sister!" Boone cried, trying to grab Kate's suitcase.
"Let go!" she grunted, trying to pull it free from his hands. "Get your dirty little hands off of it!"
"Listen to her!" Jack ran forward, grabbing Little B's hair and pulling back. Boone let go, grabbing Jack's hand and trying to pull his hands off of his hair.
"Get off of me," Sayid spat out, trying to shove Sawyer off of him.
"The broad won't let go," Sawyer cried out, screaming. "It hurts so bad!"
"I said to get off!" Sayid mustered all of his strength and pushed them off of him. Sawyer was still in the middle, but Shannon was now on the bottom, and Sayid on top. He pushed himself off and threw himself at Boone, wrapping his arms around the boy's neck and pulling hard.
"You fool!" Sayid cried. "Do you understand what you put us through? Do you understand the danger that we were in? You sick, sick monster!"
At that moment, Michael and Walt walked by.
"Look, Dad, they're fighting!" Walt said, his voice aw-filled.
"We're going to avoid this, okay, son? Let's keep going." Michael tried to shove his son along.
"Yeah, you keep on going, brat-face!" Sawyer shouted, glaring at Walt as Shannon tightened her grip. Walt stuck his tongue out. "Well that's just nice! Didn't your bum-dad teach you any manners?"
"Nobody calls my son a brat," Michael retorted, running towards Sawyer. He turned around, pausing, smiling at the camera. -SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE- "And nobody calls me a bum, because I use this toothpaste." He flashed the toothpaste logo (SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE), and then jumped on toP of Sawyer.
"You go Dad! You go! You're The One!" Walt threw his fist in the air.
"Hold on, hold on!" Everyone stopped fighting.
"What's going on?" Kate asked. She had barely stopped her suitcase in midair.
"My son needs an important lesson." He looked down at Sawyer. "Can I?"
"Yeah, sure," Sawyer replied. Michael stood up.
"Now son, you know that I'm not The One." Michael shook his head, sighing.
"But, who is The One?" Walt was perplexed.
"Neo's The One! Shoot, what's your mom been teaching you?" He turned back to everyone. "Okay, let's get back."
He jumped on top of Sawyer, beating his back.
Sawyer head-butted Shannon. She released her GOD, putting her hands on her aching face. He easily pushed Michael off of his back, and pulled out...A GUN!
Charlie and Claire just happened to be passing by.
"Stand-back, Claire!" Charlie shouted, shielding her from the flailing arms, legs, and other inanimate objects. "You don't want to get hurt!"
Sawyer pointed his gun at several parts. Someone had knocked oil on top of them.
"No, don't shoot!" Hurley shouted, waving his arms, but Sawyer couldn't be stopped. He pulled the trigger.
There was a large explosion. Everyone stopped, their mouths open, staring at the large column of fire and smoke.
"Oh, no, Charlie, I'm having contractions!" Claire cried, her face contorted in pain.
Heheheh, the responses:
Imzadi: Ha ha, I'm glad you like it. This isn't one of my favorite chapters, but it was necessary to keep them on the island. Also it leads up to the next thing, which is quite strange... Anyway, I wish Sawyer could have found the pan pipe. Perhaps it would have given him a hobby (ha!). Unfortunately, Boone is still among us.
lordoftheringsfanficreader: Yes, I love Sayid humor. There is something about it that is so strange! I really like some other stuff coming up, I laughed so hard when I started planning it that I was crying. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter too!