Chapter Three

Starr's lady-in-waiting assisted her in dressing. The dress was a pale pink color that trailed slightly behind her and had ruffled bell sleeves.

The maid finished by brushing Starr's long hair till it shone like the sun on a bald man's recently polished head.

"Ooo, what vivid imagery!" Merry said, trying to find the bright side.

"Uh…I think she was trying to be funny…" Pippin replied.

"Oh. Right."

She fastened an intricate circlet around her head. When she finished, Starr was a vision of lovliness.

Legolas entered the room and blushed. "Starr, you are a vision of lovliness!"

"Wow, either she is running out of mushy-gushy phrases, or she just likes her characters to state the obvious!" Faramir remarked.

Starr giggled and fluttered her eyelashes again. "Legolas, honey (Elladan gagged loudly), you have yet to tell me where we're going."

"To a council with Lord Elrond and some guests. But I care not about the others, as long as you are there!" he cried passionately.

"I do not give a orc's arse about this wench!" Legolas practically screamed in frustration.

Aragorn pretended to look scandalized. "Prince! Language! Why, I have half a mind to report that to your daddy!"

"You've got half a mind alright…" Elrohir grinned.

"…Maybe even less!" Elladan contributed cheerfully.

Half an hour later, Starr found herself in the company of several Elves, Dwarves, and Men.

The latter of the two were all staring lustily at Starr, while the elves were looking jealous. Of course, Starr's beauty surpassed all.

(Cheezy flasebacks effects)

"Lady Starr, meet Lady Arwen, my daughter."

"Nice to meet you." Starr curtsied politely. Arwen just glared. After all, she paled in comparison to Starr's magnificence. Her hair looked greasy and unkempt compared to the glossy locks of Starr. Her skin seemed washed out while Starr was nicely tan and extremely slender, yet strong and well-filled out.

"Yeah right!" Arwen exploded suddenly.

"Peace, Arwen. You are the fairest in the land." Aragorn reassured her softly.

Several chairs away, Faramir was whispering the same thing to Eowyn.

Arwen waved a hand dismissively. "I care not about that. It is the impossibility of being so perfect! How could she have the gall to make herself so flawless?"

Yeah, as if a freakin' elf should talk!

(End flashback mode)

Starr blinked to realize she had missed most of the council. Granted, it would have been a lot of boring talking ("Boring!"), but she missed her opportunity to get in some of her brilliant opinions ("Brilliant?"). What a shame. ("Shame?")

"Will you stop that!" Elrohir snapped. Elladan smiled sheepishly.

Starr looked on proudly as Legolas offered himself to the quest thingie.

"Wow, love really does make you want to throw up." Eowyn muttered.

Wait. Quest. Oh no! She would simply NOT allow herself to be left behind. After the strange man with the crazy eyes…

"I HOPE she does not mean my brother." Faramir tensed slightly.

…she stood and walked gracefully over.

"You have my immeasurable wisdom." She stated. She glanced at Legolas. 'And my eternal love,' she thought to herself.

Next chapter: Getting ready for the quest! Will the Middle Earth readers go insane due to the Sue-ness of the impossibly perfect Starr?

You know, she IS fun to play with. Watch.

Crazyroninchic: 789 times 2345

Starr: (without hesitation) 1850205.

Crazyroninchic: Ain't she a kick? Couldn't you just STRANGLE her? (gets a maniac glint in her eye)

Starr: Eeep….Legolas?

Legolas: (ignores her) I was thinking more along the lines of a traditional beheading.

C: Oo, sword or guillotine?

L: Depends on how you want the cut.

C: Go on.

Well, hate to interrupt this fascinating conversation, but I have to wrap this up. Hope everyone liked the new chapter and see you for Chapter four!

Oh, and fear not! I won't be doing a bedroom scene! I'll probably just imply it. I wouldn't want to describe it, personally. (shudders) Too much perfection. It's unnatural.