Chapter Four

Starr oversaw the packing of her things, the servants scurrying around, careful not to spite her loveliness.

"She probably has twenty-five bags full of makeup and clothes," Eowyn said in disgust.

It was a week till the Fellowship was to leave, but Starr had always believed in being prepared and ahead of things. A little hard work never killed anybody.

"Then why isn't she packing her own bag?" Pippin rolled his eyes.

"Honestly, Pip. She might break a NAIL!" Merry said sarcastically, as if this was the most obvious thing in all the world.

There was a knock at the door. "Melamin?" came a smooth voice.

Legolas shuddered. "That word is dead to me."

Arwen glanced at Aragorn out of the corner of her eye. "I pity his future love." She whispered. "Anything intimate will remind him of this wench."

"Let's get back to scarring Legolas for life." Elladan said brightly, turning back to his brother after hearing Arwen's comment.

Said prince moaned in dismay and curled into the fetal position, knowing what was coming.

"Come in!" Starr called out sweetly. Catching her drift, all the servants exited quickly out the side door.

"How convenient." Aragorn muttered dryly.

Legolas entered and immediately presented Starr with a white rose and a kiss.

Feeling more at home than anywhere, Starr looked into his crystal blue eyes. "I'm ready." She said confidently.

Elrohir paused, his face turning green. "How bout I skip this part, for everyone's sake?" Legolas whimpered an affirmative, and the others looked slightly sick as they nodded.

He began to skim the pages, looking for the end of the nastiness and mumbling a few words to himself. "Lace…candles…rose petals…oh, THAT can't be physically possible…Legolas you dog…sheets…UGH!" Elrohir had to excuse himself to go be sick in the bathroom, and Elladan took up the book in his place.

He skipped about seventeen pages and finally stopped. "That had to have been the longest and most disgusting thing I've ever read. No, not read, skimmed!"

"Is it over?" Elrohir's weak voice could be heard from the bathroom.

"Yes."

As his twin walked back in, Elladan turned to Legolas, who had only just removed his hands from his ears. "You know, she WAS very flattering…If you know what I'm talking about…"

Legolas turned an interesting shade of chartreuse and keeled over right on the spot.

"Poor thing…" Eowyn mumbled.

He woke several minutes later and stared groggily around him. "Wha?"

"Oh, good, he's up! Let's continue!" Elladan said brightly, having taken up the spot of reader.

Legolas clapped a hand to his forehead.

Starr lay in her prince's arms, the sheets resting lightly across their bodies—

"Elladan!" Gimli roared. "Skip that paragraph! You're making me sick!"

"My ears! My ears!" Pippin and Merry were doing little dances of pain.

"Right o, skipping that part…" Elladan's eyes skimmed the page. "Sweet Eru, there's no end in sight!" He skipped several more pages and grinned in triumph. "Here we go!"

"So, a total of 25 pages later…" Faramir sighed.

The ten members of the Fellowship exited Rivendell in silence. That old dude with the hat and one of the short guys with hairy feet led the way. Starr walked next to Legolas, just behind the other three midget thingies.

"We're hobbits, you ignoramus!" Merry shouted at no one in particular.

Aragorn and the other guy, Boromir as it turns out, brought up the rear with the hairy troll thing. They were having a hard time not staring at Starr's perky bottom.

They traveled for what seemed like forever, until only Legolas and Starr weren't tired. The others had not the strength to keep going.

Sam began to cook, graciously receiving tips from the multi-talented Starr. When Aragorn was advising the hobbits on sword-fighting techniques, they also turned to Starr for her brilliant advice.

Legolas suddenly jumped gracefully onto a rock and stared into the distance and a gray spot in the sky.

"What is that?" one of the shorties asked.

Starr rolled her eyes. It was SO obvious. Totally.

"Obvious, huh?" Merry muttered darkly.

"Just a cloud." Boromir dismissed it.

"It moves fast, and against the wind." Someone replied. Aragorn, I think.

"Creban!" Legolas shouted.

"From Dunland!" Starr added.

The group scrambled to hide themselves. Starr conveniently found herself under a bush with Legolas.

"Because may the Valar forbid her getting stuck with Gimli!" Aragorn said sarcastically.

"HEY!"

"Sorry."