It was:
Keg! Max!
Is now:
Kiss! LUKE!
By GilmoreGirl1979 (the Reigning Quote Queen)
Part of the ORIGINAL WOULDA SHOULDA COULDA SERIES
(ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES!)

The Q: What if Nicole didn't show up to go skiing with Luke?

Luvz: I know you hate the Nipple man, here's a heaping helping of LUKE! enjoy! (HUGS)

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Chapter 2:
Movies with Mel

Lorelai was driving home. The conversation with Max gave Lorelai the closure she had always needed. It had dispelled the questions that the random kiss in the coat room brought up. A kiss that was obviously a mistake. Lorelai really didn't know why she made so much of it. Maybe it was nostalgia, missing the comfort Max had given her, comfort and safety she almost had, if she had married him. And then Chris, that comforting feeling was why she almost got back together with him, that wish fulfillment, that they could really be a family. Maybe it was her current lonely dry spell. Never mind all that now, it was the past, she had to focus on the present and the future.

Only Lorelai was now left with the confusion of her Freudian slip.

Luke?

Of all the names to say. Sure, Luke was her friend, and she had just seen him at the Inn. Naturally he'd be on her mind. And if you think comfort and safety, … Luke is always there. Lawyer or not. Well, not this weekend, "We're going skiing".I didn't even know Luke did ski. ski or skied? Damn where is Rory when I need her.

And now Max thought she was involved with Luke in a romantic capacity, which of course, …the mere idea was … ridiculous. Well, what does it really matter, I'm never going to see Max again anyway, recalling his "oh so serious" vow. And how they bumped into each other not ten seconds after in the hallway.

Lorelai couldn't help but think of the things Max had said. That from the first moment he met Luke, he sensed something between the coffee junkie/ diner enabler friends. It had long be suggested in the town by the gossips, even Rory, that they had a thing for each other.

But that doesn't matter either. Luke is with … the Lawyer.

That thought made Lorelai sad. Luke hates Lawyers, How could he date a lawyer? … Go away for a weekend with a lawyer,… have Ssss … uuuhhh, …with a lawyer.

I'm not jealous. As she took the exit for Stars Hollow.

I only care, … because … he's my friend.

To stop this absurd train of thought, Lorelai thought of the one thing that could always make her smile, Rory. Of course, now her little girl was 18 and at a keg party with Luke's nephew.

Luke.

He really ought to have more fun himself and what an idiot Nicole is to stand Luke up like that.

Gah! Lorelai had to get her mind off Luke, again. Focus on the Drive home, and Rory. She decided against driving down the street the party was on, just to check as any mother would. Lorelai hoped Rory was still having a good time, well not hoped, she did want her daughter to have fun. Not too much Fun!

Rather than just sit at home worrying about her little girl, Lorelai made a call to the Inn to make sure everything was okay. Maybe I am needed at the Inn and that will help keep my mind …occupied. "Hey Tobin, you guys doing okay? I know you're short handed." That is how I ended up doing turndown for Luke. Him again, Stop it!

"We are just fine Lorelai!" Tobin answered enthusiastically, "Thank you for checking in, that is just so nice of you."

"Well, that's why I'm the boss." Then a thought struck her that she couldn't shake, she tried to sound casual and indifferent. "Hey Tobin, … could you tell me if a Nicole Leahy has checked in yet? She should be in room 7."

"Let's see here, …" and Tobin prattled away on the front desk keyboard, "That's funny, I have a Luke Danes in room 7."

"Oh yeah he is, Nicole is supposed to join him later, …"

"Well, No Nicole Leahy yet."

"Oh, okay, thanks. Night." Lorelai hung up the phone and for some reason she felt better knowing Nicole wasn't there. Still, Luke was her friend. How sad for him; in a hotel room by himself, stood up by … the lawyer, too busy to even call her boyfriend. Luke didn't deserve that. She checked the jeep's clock, 9:07 pm. Then Lorelai pulled in front of the video store with a brilliant beyond brilliant idea.

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Knock Knock Knock.

Luke woke up, and focused on the clock, 9:21 pm. He had gotten ready for bed not long after Lorelai did turndown. He had wanted to get an early start in the morning, and if Nicole drove in late, he would be driving to the resort. Apparently, he had fallen asleep waiting for her to show. He took a few groggy steps out of bed and to the door to let his girlfriend in. Why didn't they just give her a key? Stupid French Putz.

Luke opened the door surprised to find Lorelai standing there, smiling brightly. "Hey," was all he could get out, confused by her presence.

"Oh, I'm sorry, did I wake you?"

"No, I was just waiting for Nicole, … to come, … or call, you know …"

"In the dark?" she grinned suspiciously.

"Yeah, well, … I don't think she's gonna make it now." Nicole said she was going to leave the office early at 4:00, to make it there by 6:30. She had called to say she was running late because new information had just surfaced, she may have to cancel, but she would call later. And It's what … a two and a half hour drive … from New York … with the weekend traffic, … at this time of night! Only wanting to change the subject, while turning on a light. Luke continued, "You obviously had a reason for coming here?" eying the bags in her hands.

She did stand him up! the …the … Lawyer, Poor Luke. Good thing I decided to come."Well, I felt bad leaving you here all alone," Lorelai invited herself into the room, tired of waiting for Luke to do it. "And you know, Rory and Jess are at that party." She clicked on a few other lights, "And well, … I just had worst case scenarios running through my head, you know. Like: what if the keg gets set on fire, will the explosion from the pressure of the boiling beer be powerful enough to throw Rory from the house miraculously unharmed … " still clutching her bags of supplies as her mind went off on the tangent.

"There's a party?" he asked.

Lorelai's eyes went wide, "Oh Luke, we've got to get you to pay better attention to that kid of yours." Then motherly concern hit her again, "Oh MY GOD, you were gonna leave him alone for the weekend!"

"He's not 2," Luke shrugged. And I've done it before, when is stayed at Nicole's place,…. well, not stayed, I've spent a few hours there while we… uhhh but when I've come back everything seemed in order. Now he wasn't so sure. Lorelai had that effect on him, she often instilled a state of confusion in Luke.

"But the entire weekend with your apartment all to himself? … To take my daughter and … and …"

"Lorelai!" his went eyes wide at what she was suggesting.

"Well, hello I'm speaking from personal experience! And look what happened to me!"

"Lorelai."

But she cut him off, "She's going to the Ivy League, she's going to Yale Damn it!"

"Lorelai, calm down." Luke stepped towards her and gripped her shoulders.

She did, for him she did, something in his controlled voice made her feel better, and his eyes. Taking a few deep breaths, laughing at herself, how quickly she could get riled up to protect Rory. Rory was a smart girl, and she did promise she would talk to Lorelai be before … something … of that nature … happened.

"I thought you wanted to get away from the worst case scenarios." He rubbed the sides of her arms, to soothe her worries.

"I did." She nodded, now noticing how kind his eyes were, how they always had been. …and they are blue, she couldn't remember if she ever noticed that before.

"AND you came here … to … what?" Luke hoped she'd get to her point soon. Though now he was thinking of alcohol and Jess mixing and all the trouble that would undoubtedly brew from that combination.

"Well, I got some movies, and junk food. Thought I'd keep you company."

Luke backed off, uncomfortable with the idea, of him and Lorelai, alone, for an extended period of time, in a hotel room. Turndown had been bad enough, for me at least. "Oh, … Lorelai, I don't think that is such a good idea." He wasn't sure if he could trust the feels he kept buried, despite his relationship with Nicole.

"Come on, Luke. You said yourself you don't even know if Nicole can make it now … this time of night, out of New York. That's a pretty bad commute to see my boyfriend." Was she really trying to talk down Nicole? And make Luke see the benefits of dating a … local girl? Perhaps. "You have a nice, quiet, clean room … away from Jess and his stuff, and his music. Let's make a night of it. Two parent type … people …trying to keep from worrying about their kids."

"Are you sure you just don't wanna go and chaperon?" Thinking of the fights Jess had gotten into recently. And at least their would be other people around him and Lorelai.

"No, I want to hang out with one of my best friends." And with that Lorelai plopped on the bed she had turned down just hours before, and emptied out her supplies. "I have here the Perfect Mel Brooks Movie Night, and enough sugar to make Willy Wonka jealous, and a friend I don't get to see that often."

"You know, I had plans this weekend."

"Yeah, HAD plans that have been … " she chose her words carefully, "delayed." If the Lawyer shows her face. "Come on what do you say!"

She was so excited, and she actually wanted to spend time with him. Luke reluctantly agreed, "Alright."

"Woo Hoo!"

"Could I at least order some carrot sticks from room service?" he'd rather starve than kill himself with this crap she was offering.

"No!" the she patted the bed beside her.

Of all the scenarios he thought he'd finally be alone with Lorelai, this wasn't one of 'em, Especially with Nicole, … possibly, commuting from another state. "Okay, what sort of movies do you have."

"Robin Hood: Men in Tights?"

Luke took the box, "Liz would like this," his tone sarcastic.

"Cary Elwes fan?" Lorelai was trying to follow.

"Nah, She's been doing the Renaissance circuit lately."

Lorelai gave him a look.

"I know, please don't ask."

"Okay, there is also, High Anxiety: a mockable look at the late great Alfred Hitchcock." No reaction from Luke, "Alright I also got…"

"How long are you staying?" Again worried about Nicole finding him with the sore point. If she was still coming.

Lorelai ignored his attempt at humor, "Young Frankenstein, but I think we should start with Door Number 4."

"Okay."

"Don't you even want to know why?"

"Look, the sooner we start the soon I can get to sleep."

"Dirty! Why Luke what did you have in mind?" Oh My God! She instantly regretted it, maybe that's why people think we have a thing for each other? the mock flirting. but,… is it really … mock… flirting?

Luke just rolled his eyes and adjusted against the ornate headboard on the right of the bed, his usual side. He had now built up a tolerance for Lorelai's inappropriate comments, 6 years of inappropriate comments. Like this past week, Sookie and Lorelai going on and on about his butt, right in front of him, or behind him as it were. Geez! "Just start the movie already."

Lorelai happily bounced off the bed, to the TV/VCR, standard in every room, and popped in the tape. "Just so you know, this one was picked with you especially in mind."

Her smile concerned him, "Great!" he crossed his arms, lacking enthusiasm.

Like some annoying flight attendant, Lorelai checked with her guest of honor, "Are you situated? Need to use the little boys room?"

"I'm fine, Alright? What is it already?"

She hopped on the bed next to him, on her usual side, with the remote and announced. "Spaceballs, my little Trekkie!" and hit the play button on the remote.

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Since the opening "scrolling" credits, Lorelai had been laughing and making jokes, occasionally nudging him just to get him to get to smile. She also wouldn't stop teasing him about his "appreciation" of Star Trek. "Okay half these references are about Star Wars, not Star Trek."

"Shhhhh set your phaser to mute."

Luke rolled his eyes. "That doesn't even make sense."

"Quiet!"

"You have been talking through the whole movie!"

"Yeah, well, this isn't an official Gilmore movie night."

"So?"

"Well, then the rules of movie night aren't in effect, seeing as I'm the only Gilmore present, and it's not at my house."

The rules? "Which means?"

"Well, none of the rules apply, I guess. So, … if you must, … you may talk through it too. But your comments better be damn funny mister!"

"Great!" he offered dryly, knowing he wasn't exactly the Lou Costello of this pairing.

Back to his Star Trek comment, Lorelai defended the Movie, "Didn't you see the whole beaming bit. In case you haven't noticed, this movie is making fun of all Science Fiction, he's taking on the whole genre."

"Go Mel," he offered dryly.

"Just wait for it…, " she punched his arm.

Luke sighed, but from the corner of his eye he saw Lorelai was smiling. She seemed to be happy that she could do something to help Luke, that she could make him enjoy himself, despite himself. That is why she was doing this, to get her mind off the keg party, to cheer up/spend some time with a friend. A friend who, … let's face it, was stood up. Now completely given up on Nicole,He gestured to the screen, "Half these jokes only a 13 year old boy would laugh at."

"Come on, don't you like the play on words? Like jam, give me the Raspberry, Hyperactive/Hyper jets?"

"Cornell sanders/ chicken?"

"Exactly," Lorelai turned back focused on the screen again, and watched as Lone Starr and Princess Vespa were arguing over her Industrial Strength Hair Dryer "See, they fight too, just like us," and they get married in the end…. Wait! Am I actually drawing parallels between Princess Vespa and Lone Starr and Me and Luke?

"We don't … fight." Luke shrugged.

"On no?" she grinned at him.

"It's just … our thing, we argue over Coffee, and all that crap you eat. You beg me to fix something or look at something. It's … what we do," He admitted, and Luke held her gaze for a few moments more.

Lorelai enjoyed his eyes on her, but broke the gaze, to look back at the movie. So did Luke.

However, Lorelai wasn't paying attention to the movie. She was looking at his socked feet. She considered her earlier thought of never seeing him without his boots on. Maybe when I slept over, when the Inn had the fire. Luke took me in, as a friend and refugee. God help her, she was finding his socked feet down right … sexy. To have him so comfortable around her, that he took his shoes off. To see something that was normally hidden under all his layers. Like those muscles he's been hiding. He was in his pajamas around her, for pity's sake, while she was still fully clothed.

They were both lounging on the bed, Lorelai with a mess of candy wrappers around her. Lorelai noticed as the movie went on Luke kept sinking lower and lower into his pillows. Poor guy waiting for… the lawyer, that never showed, and now I'm keeping him up past his bed time.

"You can go to sleep if you want to," She suggested.

"I'm not tired," he shook his head suddenly, and took a deep, refreshing breath, to be rid of the drowsiness; focusing on the TV again. He wanted to stay up late with Lorelai. He didn't have Nicole to worry about anymore, She's not coming; and Lorelai actually wanted to spend time with him. This was a rare chance, without townies or teens to interfere.Then he wondered, is this Cheating?Nothing's happened, Lorelai punched him in the arm again.

"See, Vulcan neck pinch right there!"

"Two references in the whole movie."

"Well, don't you like all Science Fiction?" she teased.

He stayed silent.

"Luke?" she encouraged the confession.

"Fine, yes, I like science fiction! So what?"

"HA! I finally got you to admit it," she bounced triumphantly.

"Geez, just watch the movie."

As Lorelai was getting to know her diner man better, she didn't even realize she had forgotten about Max.

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May the Schwartz be with you and Spaceballs concluded.Lorelai was telling Luke all the fascinating behind the scenes trivia she knew about it.

"And that was really John Hurt, which is funny cause he basically just redid his scene from Alien."

"Yeah, I caught that."

"Cause you're a sci fi man"

"If you call me that in the diner, no Coffee for a year!"he playfully threatened.

She stopped with the teasing, for now. "Did you like it?" Lorelai asked eagerly.

"There were a lot of jokes … in poor taste."

"What all the double entendres? What? Did they make you uncomfortable?"she grinned, okay I'm now definitely flirting.Stop that! "Wait till we get you watching Austin Powers."

This is going to happen again? a Luke and Lorelai movie night? Nicole would just love that. Luke had to get away from Lorelai, knowing she was just trying to get to him. Check his propriety threshold, so he went to check on the fire, and put another couple of real logs on to keep it going through the next movie. Lorelai isn't gonna be happy unless we watch at least two, I hope only two. Part of him hoped she'd leave after the next one, and the other … hoped she didn't. Nicole, you gotta think about Nicole.

Lorelai tried not to stare, but he looked so good, in this long sleeved shirt and sweatpants, and the only thing on TV now was an infomercial. Hmmmm Infomercial? Or Luke's butt, Sookie was right it does have a nice shape to it. She thought of the past week, when Sookie had given him a hard time with no sense of propriety freely teasing and talking about his butt. I'll admit, I was totally check him out when he left that day! And here she was in a hotel room alone with Luke, able to truly appreciate all his … attributes. Damn, my thoughts are now very cinemax at night. He has a girlfriend, he has a girlfriend. and I'm not interested in him that way. … am I?

"What do you wanna watch next?"

Your butt, "ummmmm Young Frankenstein, I love that 'putting on the Ritz' number."

"Okay," and Luke bend down to put the tape in. Oh, why do you tease me? Stop it, he's your friend, bad Luke thoughts, bad, he has a girlfriend.

Luke laid down on the bed again, and Lorelai didn't know if he'd make it through opening credits. Well see how far he goes.ummmmm dirty?

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"That was all God given talent..." why thank you Luke...
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R/R: PLEASE, I like to better myself. To quote The Princess Bride,
"...Remember this is for posterity, ... so be honest."
Please be specific with R/R; name one (or as many as you can think of or want to mention..…) at least specific thing you liked

Please! It makes me feel good...inside (Dirty!)

Hence the Rant option below.

Insert Rant here V
A/N: if not completely satisfied with this chapter, please return unused portion for a full refund …