The O.C

A Life Half Lived

A/N: Sorry I haven't updated lately. I was working on finishing 'Intertwined,' which is now done and I've been working on a new Alias story, 'Redemption.' If you're an Alias fan, check it out. Happy reading! Genevra xxox

Spoiler (and explanation): Zach is not the father of the baby. The incident with him happened back in the second season. This story is seven/eight years in the future and they are twenty-four/twenty-five.

Attention 'Intertwined' readers: I will be doing a sequel in the next few weeks. It will probably be called 'Entangled.' Look out for it!

Kursk: This chapter explains a little more why Seth hasn't been with Summer very much. Hope it's a satisfactory explanation, lol.

Summary: "I don't look sick. I am sick."

Disclaimer: I do not own nor am I affiliated with The OC. Sigh. I do however own any characters or scenarios you don't recognize. Yay!

Chapter Five: Always

"Coop?" Summer's feeble voice called out from the bedroom.

"Yeah, Sum?" Marissa called back from across the hallway where she was packing her bags and preparing to go home. It had been two weeks since they had learned about Summer's illness. She had started treatment and apart from the nausea that rocked her body every morning, she was taking it well. Marissa had decided to go home and let Seth take care of his wife for a while. She needed the rest. Being around Summer and seeing her in her condition depressed her. And angered her.

"Can you get Seth for me?" Summer said, as Marissa appeared in the doorway.

"Sure, babe," Marissa said. She went over and fixed the covers around Summer first and handed her a glass of water. Summer pushed it away.

"I can get my own water, Marissa. I'm not a baby," she yelled.

"Sorry," Marissa whispered weakly. She straightened herself up. "I'll go see if I can find Seth."

Marissa steeled herself and walked down the hallway to the long stairs where she ran into Ryan and Alexis.

"Hey," Ryan said.

"Hey yourself," she said as she leant over to kiss him. He embraced her and held for a second, his hand running through her hair. She kneeled down and hugged and kissed her little girl. "Hey, baby girl."

"Hello, Mummy," Alexis smiled.

"We just came to see if you were ready to go," Ryan explained. "Alexis has missed you and she's desperate to get you home."

She looked at her little girl.

"That true, honey? You want Mummy to come home?" Marissa asked.

"Yep," she smiled happily. She attached herself to Marissa's waist. "Can I go see Aunty Summer?"

"I don't know if that's such a good idea," Marissa started but Ryan stopped her with a glance. "Yeah, honey. Go see Aunty Summer. But if she's asleep or gets tired, you need to come downstairs and find me, ok?"

"Yes, Mummy," Alexis said, running off.

"Alexis," Marissa called quickly. The little girl stopped in her tracks. "Be good. And don't be too noisy."

"Yes, Mama," she called back, resuming her run.

Marissa turned to Ryan and blinked back some tears.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Ryan asked, his eyes widening in concern. "Come here."

She collapsed onto his chest and cried silently for a few moments.

"She's really sick, Ryan," Marissa said. "The Chemo is really affecting her. She has major mood swings, she can't keep any food down. She doesn't sleep properly."

"It was never going to be easy," Ryan said, patting her back soothingly.

"I know, but I didn't realize it was going to be so hard," Marissa said. She pulled away and wiped her face. "I feel really bad leaving her."

"Don't," Ryan said. "Sandy and Kirsten are only a few doors down and we're only a few minutes away. If they need us, they'll call."

"I know but…"

"Marissa, no buts. You need to come home. You can't do anything for her and you know as well as I do that Seth and her need to get through this together," Ryan said. "And besides,Lexie misses you. I miss you."

"You do?" Marissa asked.

"Of course," he said. "I miss your snoring in the night. It's amazing."

"I do not snore," Marissa laughed, hitting him.

"You do," he said, swinging an arm around her shoulder. They were about to kiss again when they were interrupted by Alexis tugging on Marissa's arm.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" she asked. The girl didn't answer for a moment. "Lexie?"

"Aunty Summer's crying," she said, her eyes welling up. "She says she wants Seth."

"Shoot," Marissa said, smacking her forehead. "I forgot to get Seth."

"You go to Summer, I'll go find Seth," Ryan said.

"You didn't see him when he came in?" Marissa asked.

Kirsten appeared at the stairs, hearing the commotion.

"What's wrong?" she asked when she saw Alexis's teary face. Alexis ran to her grandmother and threw her arms around her waist. "Baby, what's wrong?"

"Summer's in pain," Ryan explained. "I need to find Seth."

"I thought he was with you," Kirsten said. "He told me you two were going to get pizza for dinner."

Marissa and Ryan froze in their spot. Marissa and Kirsten's gaze met and they gasped.

"Ryan, take Alexis over to Jimmy's and then go out and look for Seth. Marissa, try his mobile and work numbers. Call Alex and Sandy too," Kirsten said, taking charge. "If they haven't seen him, get them over here to look for him. I'll go to Summer."

"Where is he?" Kirsten shrieked.

"Honey, it's ok. Calm down," Sandy said, grabbing his crying wife.

"I will not calm down!" she screamed. She was punching him as he stood, solid as a brick wall, ever the loving husband.

"Wherever he is, I'm sure he's safe," Sandy tried.

"Don't give me that crap, Sandy!" she screamed, pushing him away. "Don't give me that crap."

She looked at him, her gaze steely. Every inch of her wanted to blame him for this. For bringing Ryan home in the first place. For letting his own son go in the first place, but she couldn't. she had to understand that Seth was a grown boy who could make his own decisions. That didn't mean she had to like him. she looked away from her husband and sunk to the floor, her shoulders shaking with the emotion as she cried.

"Bring him back, Sandy," she said, looking up at him, her eyes and voice broken. "Bring him back."

"Summer, sweetie?" Kirsten called softly. Her voice was tentative and nervous. She moved to her daughter in-law's bedside and sat down next to her. She stroked her warm and sweaty cheek and wiped away her tears.

"Where's Seth?" she gasped. She groaned as a sharp wave of pain flew across her body.

"He went out to grab some pizza," Kirsten said. She helped Summer take a drink of water and then swallow two blue pills that, in theory, were supposed to slow the ebb of pain.

"Kirsten," Summer said. She looked like she was going to throw up. "Don't lie to me. Where is my husband?"

Kirsten paused and breathed in deeply. She made sure Summer had swallowed the pills and was lying in a more comfortable position before she told her.

"He's gone, Sum," she said. She automatically reached for the bucket and held it in front of Summer as she threw up what little of her lunch she'd been able to keep down.

"Gone?" Summer said. "As in, left. As in, we have no idea where he is?"

"It's not like that," Kirsten started but stopped when she saw the look on Summer's pale face. "I'm sure he just needed some time away from all of this. He'll be back, Summer. I promise."

"Why did you leave?" Summer asked. They had been back together for a couple of months. Summer had realized she liked falling asleep, curled up in Seth's arms.

"I just couldn't deal with it," Seth said. His voice was calm and even but she could hear the steel and fear in his voice. "I keep everything inside and I do nothing about my feelings until it gets to much and I just have to leave and get away from it all. I just have to collect my thoughts and figure out how I'm going to deal with it, instead of burying it again."

"I kinda understand," she said finally, reassuring him that this was not going to turn into a fight.

"Really?" he asked, all apprehension gone. He felt her nod lightly and he pulled her closer. A shiver ran through her body. "I never meant to hurt you."

"I know."

"I love you," he said, finally. It wasn't the first time he had said it. no, not at all. He had screamed it in his head, it had squelched through is pores and could be seen in his eyes. His movements said 'I love you,' his casual stares. Everything about him said it but he had never admitted it out loud and to her face.

She paused and somehow kept back the smile on her face. She casually turned to him and saw his face was white and pale. His eyes were darting everywhere but her face. He was nervous. She kissed his Adam's apple and looked up at him.

"I love you too," she said. He stared down at her again and smiled. She finally let go of her inhibitions and broke into a huge beaming smile. they kissed happily.

"I will never leave you again," Seth said.

"Don't say that," Summer said, placing a hand on his mouth. "If you ever do, you'll be lying to me and I couldn't take that."

"What should I say then?" he asked.

"Tell me you'll always come back," she ordered.

"I'll always come back," he whispered.

"Good," she said, kissing him again. "Good."

A/N: This chapter was getting a bit long but rest assured, he will be back soon!