The O.C
A Life Half Lived
A/N: What kind of a person do you think I am? Of course I'm not going to kill Summer before Seth gets to the hospital. Geez. I do have a heart. Lol. I tried to explain a little more how Seth felt. He's basically gutted and doesn't know how to deal with it, as you would be. I hope you like this chapter. It took awhile. Happy reading! Genevra xxox
Setting: (Important-ish) For the purpose of the story, I'm changing the timeline a little. It's been two month since Summer started Chemo and she is therefore, seven months pregnant.
Summary: "I don't look sick. I am sick."
Disclaimer: I do not own nor am I affiliated with The OC. Sigh. I do however own any characters or scenarios you don't recognize. Yay!
Chapter Seven: How to Deal
"Seth," Kirsten cried. She ran towards him and threw her arms around him. "Where were you? We were so worried."
"How's Summer?" Seth asked, not bothering to glance at anyone else or calm his mother.
"She's doing okay," Sandy answered. He walked over to Kirsten and taking her hand, pulled her away from their son. "She isn't allowed any visitors for the next half an hour."
Seth's face went red with anger and he stormed towards the nurse's office.
"Seth, where are you going?" Kirsten yelled.
"To find a doctor who will let me see my wife," he called over his shoulder.
"Sandy, stop him before he makes a fool of himself," Kirsten said. She closed her eyes and went and took a seat near Marissa as Sandy and Ryan walked off behind Seth. "I can't believe this. This is so surreal. Three months ago she was healthy and carrying a healthy baby. Now she's trapped in a hospital bed looking gaunt and pale. The Chemo was going fine. Why did this happen?"
"I don't think any of us know anymore," Marissa said tiredly. "I'm just glad Seth made it in time."
They were silent for a moment. Kirsten dropped her head onto Marissa's shoulder and Marissa automatically leant her head on top.
"Hey, hey," Marissa comforted as Kirsten sobbed onto her shoulder.
"They don't teach you how to deal with this at school," Kirsten cried. "How do you deal with the fact that your daughter in-law who is pregnant with your grandchild is fighting a disease that is rare in pregnant women? How do you deal with the fact that your son can't deal with it and so runs away?"
"I don't know," Marissa admitted, rubbing Kirsten's back. Their silhouette cut a picture against the wall and passer-bys found themselves momentarily immobilized by their grief. "But we are doing so well. You are doing so well. You're really dealing with this. You should be so proud."
"Hard to be proud that you're holding up when one of the people you love most in the world isn't holding up," Kirsten whispered.
"I know."
"I'm worried about her," Kirsten says, wrapping her hands around her steaming mug. She looks up at Marissa, who has just handed her said mug,and smiles. "Thanks, sweetie."
"Who? Summer?" Ryan asks. His chopsticks are poised above his plate and he remembers something. "Do you remember the time we ordered Chinese?"
"Which time?" Kirsten snaps back, sarcastically. The amount of times they had ordered Chinese over the years was astronomical.
"That time when you started off with like three dishes and then we ended up spending nearly eighty dollars on food," Ryan replies, taking a bite of his noodles.
"I remember," Sandy shoots back. "It was about two months after the whole Zach incident."
"Sweetie, this is beautiful," Kirsten says as she sips her first cup of Chai tea, courtesy of Marissa. 'Anyway, the Zach incident. That brings me back to my point. It's the three-year anniversary of that night. She's spent the week walking around the house in a daze. Nothing affects her. She even missed a double episode of 'The Valley.'"
"It must be serious then," Sandy laughs. Ryan chuckles a little but they both find themselves silenced by Kirsten's glare. "I'm sorry."
"I just don't think she's equipped to deal with this sort of thing," Kirsten explains. "She just completely shuts down and buries it all away."
"Sort of like you," Sandy mutters under his breath. She catches him in a look and then sighs.
"Sort of exactly like me," Kirsten agrees. "You three deal with problems when they happen. Seth, Summer and I, we don't. We tend to bottle it all up and then do something dramatic like sail away to get over it."
"I highly doubt Summer is going to sail away," Sandy says. "But, before you get all huffy, I understand what you're saying. But, really Kirsten, what are we going to do about it?"
"I don't know," Kirsten finally whispers. "But I am so worried."
"Seth, I think you should calm down," Ryan said, placing a hand on Seth's soldiers.
"I don't want to calm down," Seth seethed. He was pacing in front of the doctor's office, where Ryan and Sandy had finally found him. "I want to see my wife."
"Your father will take care of it," Ryan said. "I promise."
"I just don't want anything to happen to her until I can tell her I'm sorry," Seth explained. He continued pacing but slower now. "I need to explain to her why I wasn't there for her. I need to tell her why I left."
"You will get to," Ryan promised. "She's going to be fine."
"Everyone keeps saying that," Seth exploded. "But one day, she isn't going to be fine. And I don't think I can deal with that."
"Seth!" Ryan yelled. His voice sliced through the tense silence that had just covered the hallway. "Today is not that day."
Sandy exited the office with a doctor in tow.
"Seth, you can see Summer but you have to calm down," he explained what Ryan thought was logic. Apparently Seth thought so too.
"I know, Dad. I'm not stupid," Seth exploded again. "I'm not going to go in there and yell at my wife."
"Mr. Cohen?" the doctor interrupted. Both Cohen men looked up. "I'm Dr. Roberts. Your wife's doctor."
"Roberts was her maiden name," Seth said.
"I know," Dr. Roberts smiled. "I thought I should tell you what's going on with your wife. Her immune system had a reaction to the Chemotherapy, which is rare, even for a pregnant woman. Normally, a cancer patient would experience dizziness, nausea, vomiting and an inability to keep food down."
"Yes, Summer's experienced all of those," Seth said, the expression on his face growing confused. He listed a few times when Summer had experienced each of the symptoms. He saw Ryan and Sandy exchange a look and he stared at them. "What?"
"You're beating yourself up because you want to tell your wife you haven't been there for her and yet you know half a dozen times when she's thrown up alone," Sandy said. "I'd say that you have nothing to worry about."
Dr Roberts stood patiently as he listened to the three men talk. It wasn't unusual, or uncomfortable, for him to overhear conversations like this. He waited for a moment before he interrupted.
"I'm sorry, may I continue?" he asked. The men looked up in shock, forgetting he was there. "Mr. Cohen, the Chemo hasn't affected just your wife's immune system, it has affected the baby's. Your child's heartbeat is up substantially high and if she doesn't calm down soon, we will have to induce labor."
"Summer isn't strong enough to go through labor," Seth said, his face paling. "And she won't be able to have Chemo for awhile if she has a Caesarean."
"That's right," the doctor replied. His tone wasn't patronizing nor was his face joyous. "I think you should now that we are doing everything we can so it doesn't come to that."
"Thank you," Sandy said, sensing that Seth couldn't move his mouth to form the words. "We appreciate that. Summer is very special to us all."
Seth noticeably deflated. He started to sink to the floor. All he could feel was Ryan and Sandy's arms propping him up. He could lose his wife and his baby all in one night. Why was this happening to him? He wasn't equipped to deal with this sort of thing.
"Mr. Cohen, you're in shock. I think you should sit down," Dr Roberts said, taking charge.
"Of course I'm in shock," Seth snapped. He knew in the morning he'd feel horrible for snapping at the nothing but kind doctor, but right now he couldn't help it. he looked at the doctor's face and instead of pinched anger, he was compassion and understanding. He let himself be helped to a seat. "I think anyone who is in my position would be. And I'm not just in shock, I'm gutted. My wife is more than likely going to die soon. My child might die too. I'm going to be left with nothing."
"I understand your concern, Mr. Cohen but-" the doctor tries to interrupt but Seth is an unstoppable, uncontrollable force.
"I mean, everyone always wants to know how Summer's going," he says. "And I answer them but underneath, all I think is, what about me? How selfish is that? My wife is sick and I want people to ask how I am."
"It's only natural," the doctor says. This time Seth is listening. "Mr. Cohen, you're naturally upset about your wife but people don't tend to comment on it. In most cases, it's because people are having enough trouble dealing with your wife's sickness that they don't think they can carry any of your burden too."
"I don't want to give them my burden. I like my burden. I just want people to know she's not the only one suffering," Seth explained, a hint of the old sarcastic Cohen shining through. "I'm devastated that something like this could happen to my family but I'm more upset that I can't handle it. But really, who can handle the thought of their wife or child dying?"
"The chances of your wife dying are very slim, Mr. Cohen," the doctor finally explained, as if he knew what Seth was thinking. He looked over at Sandy and Ryan who wore identical pained expressions. "I understand that this is your main concern at the moment, but I am telling you not to worry. Mr. Cohen, I am going to take you to your wife's room right now but I need you to promise me you will stay calm. If you don't, you could raise your wife's heartbeat, which will only increase the baby's. Do you promise?"
"Yeah," Seth agreed.
"I think Seth is too shocked not to be calm," Sandy said, as they morosely walked towards Summer's hospital room. Ryan shivered when he saw Kirsten and Marissa sitting, their heads leant against each other.
"Ryan," Marissa said, standing up. She automatically walked over to him and he reflexively bought her into his arms. Sandy went straight over to Kirsten and she transferred her head to his shoulder.
"Seth's going into see Summer now," Ryan said. Kirsten nodded and Marissa offered him a smile.
"Tell her we love her," she whispered.
"I will."
It's early morning and Julie and Kirsten sit in the kitchen, eyes bugging out of their sockets, nursing coffee.
"I can't believe we stayed up all night," Kirsten murmurs. "I haven't done that since I was a teenager."
"It's not like it was for anything fun like a keg party either," Julie agrees.
"No. We stayed up all night nursing Summer and waiting for our children to return from God knows where," Kirsten sighs. They had heard the Range Rover leaving the compound at two in the morning and after finding that Seth, Ryan and Marissa weren't in the pool house, they had stayed up watching movies until they'd heard the car race up the driveway around four. They had decided it wasn't worth sleeping so they grabbed a bottle of wine and resumed their positions.
Seth traipses into the kitchen and blinks when he sees his mother and Julie sitting there. he had hoped they'd still be asleep. Looking at them, he knows they know they'd left the house.
"I'm going to go in and check on Summer," Seth says, in a voice that invites no argument. Kirsten nods at him and smiles. He relaxes a little, realizing they aren't going to question him.
"I'm so proud of you, Seth," she says. "For being so brave."
Julie looks on and hides a smile as Marissa comes in and taps her shoulder.
"Can we go home, Mum?" she asks. The two look flustered as they enter from the direction of the pool-house.
"Where did you guys go last night?" Julie asks,
"We spent all night in the pool-house," Ryan says, a little too quickly. He swallows and looks at Kirsten. "What's for breakfast?"
"Where did you go, Ryan?" Kirsten asks, not buying their little act for a moment.
"We just went for a drive to the pier," Marissa says finally. They can't tell if she's lying. "We thought we might find Zach there. We just wanted to talk to him. Mum, can we please go home now?"
"In a minute, sweetie," Julie replies, grateful for the fact that Marissa is actually talking to her. They will have a long talk on the way home and sort everything out, she thinks. "Seth's just going in to check on Summer."
"Tell her love her," Marissa whispers. She feels her mother's hand find hers and squeezes it and for once, she doesn't pull away. It's nice to feel her strength.
"She's going to need your strength," Julie tells Seth. "I know. I've been in her position before. She'll pretend she doesn't want your help, but she'll need you."
Everyone manages to wipe the questioning looks off their faces before Julie looks at them all. She picks up her handbag and smiles.
"Ready, sweetie?" she asks, flashing Marissa a smile. Marissa goes off to say goodbye to Ryan and Julie walks over to Kirsten and kisses her cheek. "I'd appreciate it if the fact I let myself be raped wasn't spread across Newport."
"Of course," Kirsten readily agrees. "I'm so sorry. I never knew."
"Don't be," Julie says. "I chose to keep it a secret. I'm only telling you now because I know what Summer's going through. Don't let it pull her down."
She and Marissa leave soon after and the startling revelation makes everything feel different.
"I think Julie Cooper-Nichol just did the least selfish thing in her life," Sandy exclaims. Kirsten shoots him a withering glare but he is adamant. "No, really. This is what she's been hiding all these years. This is what made her the way she is. I think she's actually doing it to help Summer. She doesn't want Summer to turn out like her."
"Like that would happen anyway," Seth half-spits. He turns and walks out the door. "I'll be in my room if you need me."
He walks the halls in a daze. He never thought he would be in this position again, having a sleeping Summer in his room. Yet here he is. He knocks on the door lightly and enters.
"How are you feeling?" he asks, as he takes a seat on the edge of the bed. He doesn't want to force her into being close to him just yet. He doesn't know how she feels about physical contact now that the sun is shining.
"Will you hold me again?" she asks.
"I knew you'd miss that one day," he jokes. She shoots something back and Seth smiles. It's refreshing for everything to be back the way it used to be. He never wants it to change.
Another A/N: Seth and Summer will be together in the next chapter I swear. This one was getting a little long but. Sorry!