Chapter Three: I Want to Tell You Everything
Author's Note: I revised parts of this chapter after having some really good ideas on where to take the story! I also didn't like how the conversation between Yuna and Brother turned out, so I fixed it up a bit. I also added a bit more to the Shinra conversation, and I added a new "love discovery" scene to the very end of the chapter. The whole story is going to take a more mystery/adventure/romance sort of theme within the following chapters. I hope anyone keeping up with this will enjoy it!
"Yuna! What the!" Tidus cried, snapping Yuna out of her thoughts.
"What's wrong?" Yuna looked down at him from where she was standing. She immediately noticed a monkey had found a Tidus' head to be a comfortable perch. Another monkey was busy climbing up his back. All the while, Tidus had a wide-eyed expression of confusion on his face. Yuna chucked at the humorous scene. "Oh, that." She responded coyly.
"What's with all these monkeys?" Tidus exclaimed, gesturing to the surrounding area, which was covered by dozens of the furry creatures. Many were running around the area chasing after one another playfully. Several were sleeping, while others were hopping about the area making their tell-tale sounds.
"Well..." Yuna began, just before hopping off he edge, landing next to him in the water with a splash. "After we defeated Sin, this place became quite the tourist attraction. When Rikku, Paine and I came here, I decided to 'help' the monkeys so maybe people wouldn't come here anymore." She looked at the deep blue-violet sky which was quickly fading into black. "This place is very special to me." Her continued softly.
Tidus laughed. "Well, looks like you did a good job. I don't see anyone else here." He began walking towards dry earth after taking Yuna's hand.
"So what now?" Yuna asked.
"I want to stay here a bit longer, if that's okay."
"That's fine." She said, finding a spot on the ground in front of the remains of the campfire two years ago. Tidus sat beside her. "People even made a fuss over this campfire." She explained.
"Really?" Tidus looked at her. Yuna nodded. A long pause passed between the two.
"You know..." Yuna spoke, breaking the long silence. "I never really talked much about that night." She pulled her knees close to her body, resting her chin on them as she stared at the ground below her. "Nobody really asked... and I really didn't want to talk about it." She paused again, glancing over at Tidus.
"I remember all I wanted to do was keep you alive." He spoke gently. "Sure, I had finally seen Zanarkand in ruins. But, it wasn't my Zanarkand. I think by then I had already realized that I wasn't going back. What was more important was making sure we put an end to it. I had to do it for my old man, and I had to do it for you."
Yuna was silent again, looking up at the stars above as she struggled with finding the words to express her emotions. "I was... so anxious that night." She began. "Part of me wanted to give up my pilgrimage and stay with you. But the better part of me knew I had to go on and continue. I couldn't afford to be selfish back then." Her eyes met his for a moment. "Thank you."
"For what?" Tidus questioned.
"Thank you for staying with me."
"I disappeared." Tidus felt pangs of guilt in his stomach. "I know you said you forgave me. But sometimes, I just have a hard time dealing with it."
"I think.." Yuna began. "Maybe I needed that time alone." Tidus glanced at Yuna, her words catching him off guard. "I discovered so much about myself and Spira that I had never had the chance to see. I went searching for you, and I thought that maybe I hadn't found you at all. But then, when we came back to Besaid... I just knew." Yuna paused again, smiling at him. "You never disappeared. To me, you were always right there beside me."
"Always..." Tidus spoke, remembering his promise.
"Always." Yuna smiled placing her hand over her heart.
Tidus smiled and moved close to her, wrapping his arm around her waist. In response, Yuna nestled her head into his shoulder.
"Always.: He repeated, barely above a whisper. He pondered how long this always would be. He had returned from the Farplane, even two years later the woman he held beside him still wanted him near. For a fleeting moment, he had thought that perhaps she had found someone else. He remembered her saying something about marriage proposals from men all over Spira. He couldn't soon forget the spectacle Brother had made of himself upon his return. He felt lucky. He wasn't sure what she had seen in him. Even when they met for the first time, she was the only person who believed him. She was strong, patient, forgiving, not to mention beautiful. For that, he was thankful.
"I'm afraid, Yuna."
"Of what?"
"I'm afraid I won't be able to make you happy." He looked at her with a forlorn expression. "Even if I don't disappear again, I don't think I could live with myself if I did something to hurt you."
"You know," Yuna began. "After the calm began, Wakka and Lulu started showing interest in each other. Well, actually, I could tell that had been going on even during my pilgrimage. I think they had other more important issues to take care of. But anyway, Wakka would always do something to upset Lulu. There were a few times when he had done something that really hurt her. Although he never meant it, it seemed to happen an awful lot. Sometimes I'd find her crying. She told me that day that love is something that feels wonderful, but it also feels just as painful. Sometimes I would catch them arguing loudly over the smallest of things, but they always managed to make it through. I think... Maybe when times like that come, we can deal with it. There's no use worrying about it now."
"I guess you're right." Tidus was silent for a moment "You know, I heard someone say once that you treat people you... um, really care about just like the way your parents did... or something like that." He sighed in frustration. He had meant to say 'love', but he had always struggled with using that word. "What I meant to say is that, I'm afraid that I'm going to treat you the way that my old man treated my mom. He'd always come home late at night, drunk, and he'd fight with her and make her cry. I don't want to do that to you, Yuna. You deserve better than that. I'm afraid you deserve better than me."
"Don't say that!" Yuna protested, wrapping her arms around him. "I wanted you to be my guardian, and I want you here beside me even now. We have to stay together, right?" She buried her face into his chest, his steady rhythmic heartbeat echoed through his chest, soothing her. "...Right?"
"I want to stay with you Yuna." He spoke softly, running his gloved hand through her hair in an effort to comfort her. "I'm afraid, that's all. But we'll take care of it when the time comes. Just like you said." He embraced her tightly, Several quiet moments passed before Yuna's communicator broke through.
"Yuna, everything okay down there?" It was Buddy. "Sorry to interrupt you guys, but Brother is getting harder to deal with by the minute."
Yuna looked at Tidus questioningly. "Are you... sure?".
"It's all right. We're ready." Tidus spoke up.
"Alright, we'll be right there." With that, the transmission was closed.
"I hate doing this to him." Yuna said, as they walked towards the Bridge. "I kinda hoped I wouldn't have to confront him about this." She bit her lower lip as they approached the doors. Tidus stopped her, grabbing her wrist gently.
"You can do this Yuna. It's okay. I'll be waiting out here for you."
"Thank you." She embraced him momentarily before stepping in front of the door, activating the motion detector. The doors before her sprung open and she stepped in, to find a quietly sobbing Brother sitting in his usual seat. No one on the Bridge said a word as she approached him cautiously. The air seemed to be thick, which only increased the apprehension that Yuna felt in the pit of her stomach. She finally reached his seat. Only to stand there quietly for a moment gathering her words.
She remembered reading stories of unrequited love, and how painful it was. She could only imagine the pain that her cousin and friend was feeling. She felt truly lucky to have the man waiting near the doorway reciprocate her feelings. He did, didn't he? Brother had always been such an enormous help to her during her pilgrimage and her time with the Gullwings. Yuna had always been kind-hearted and patient. Breaking the heart of a person she truly cared about was not something she could do. However, she knew that she had to him something, anything. She swallowed hard, frantically searching for the right words to say.
"Why Yuna?" Brother spoke, breaking the silence.
"Say something, anything!" She thought to herself, as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other nervously. "This... Isn't easy for me."
"It is not easy for me either!" He replied morosely.
"I guess maybe I should get straight to the point then." Yuna felt as if the weight of all Spira was resting on her shoulders. "I don't feel the same way Brother. I never have." She could almost feel the words strike him like a thousand sharp knives as he sat there, stunned. She paused for a moment, quickly thinking of something she could say to ease the pain of her last statement. "Please, don't take me the wrong way..." She continued.
"What have I ever done to you?" His bloodshot emerald eyes were filled with new tears.
"Nothing Brother. You've never done anything to wrong me. In fact, I appreciate everything you've done for us, for Rikku, for Paine, for Buddy, Shinra, and especially me throughout this journey and my pilgrimage two years ago. You've done so much for us, I don't know where we would be without you." She paused again, trying to read his expression. His head was lowered, gazing at his hands, fumbling in his lap. "I just... I just... could never love you that way. My mind was always set on him. So that's why I couldn't feel the same way about you."
Brother's hands were shaking nervously. He tried to hold back all the emotions pummeling through him. In a frustrated sigh, he slumped over in his seat. "It hurts."
"I know it hurts, and it hurts me a lot to say this. It really does. I care about you a lot." She said, taking a step closer to him.
"Really?" His tone of voice improved.
"Yes." She said. "You are a cherished friend and a wonderful cousin. Because of that reason, I really wouldn't be right for me to have pursue that with you, even if I did have those kinds of feelings for you." She smiled, pausing for another moment to gather more words. "I do love you in another way though. I know that may not be enough for you, and I hope maybe one day you will understand."
"Yuna loves me as a friend?" He smiled for the first time in the past eighteen hours.
"Of course!" Yuna held out her arms, welcoming him for an embrace. Brother jumped at the opportunity, squeezing her so tightly that she found it hard to breathe. When he finally released his death-grip, she turned to him again. "I'm sorry Brother, I really am."
"It still hurts, but I will get better." He said, once again returning his glance to his hands. "I-I am happy for you." He said sullenly. "I should have known all along. But when you were with us, Yuna made my heart sing." Brother sighed deeply. "Yuna has found what she was looking for. I will find my happiness too someday." He paused for a moment.
"Thank you Brother!" Yuna giggled, before placing a friendly kiss on his cheek. The brief contact, sent an electric chill up his spine, causing him to jump to his feet.
"Whooo-hoo! Where to next?" Brother exclaimed, hopping back into his seat.
"Let's go visit Khimari!" Yuna laughed.
"Gagazet, here we gooooooo!" Brother shouted, as the Celsius took off at full speed. A loud thump and yelp resounded behind the door. Yuna immediately ran to the back of the Bridge.
"Whoops!" She cried as the door flung open, revealing Tidus sitting on the cold steel floor rubbing the back of his head. "Are you okay?" She held her hand out to him.
"Yeah, I'm all right." He took her hand, as Yuna helped pull him to his feet. "You don't think he did that on purpose did he?" Tidus complained, checking his other hand for any signs of blood.
"I don't think so." She said.
"Did it go over well?"
"Yeah, I think so." Yuna looked over in Brother's general direction. He seemed to be back to his usual self again.
"Yuna!" Shinra called from inside the Bridge. "I want all of you to come here for a minute!"
Yuna, Tidus, Rikku and Paine approached him. The younger boy sat in the chair examining the sphere screen before him. "What's up?" Rikku asked.
"I've been developing these for awhile, but I want you guys to try it out for me. Think of it as a beta-test." He peeked over his seat looking at the four people standing around him. After a second, he sat down, opening a steel box he had taken from below his seat. He pulled out a small electronic device attached to a leather wristband. "I present to you, the personal commsphere unit, or PCS unit for short!" Shinra exclaimed proudly. "This allows you to contact the commsphere network we installed throughout Spira. It also allows you to contact anyone else with one of these. On top of that, if any of you should be separated, it contains a tracking device so that you can find each other easily. It also contains a direct link to the Celsius, so you can call it from wherever you are."
"What prompted you to make them?" Paine asked, examining the device Shinra was displaying for her.
"Cid asked if I could make two for him. I decided while I was at it, I'd make some for the rest of you. But since we have another person on board, we'll have to let Buddy and Brother use the fifth one." The boy explained.
"Whoa! Neato!" Rikku exclaimed, hopping around as per usual.
"Would you like to check the Commsphere Network?" Shinra asked.
"Alright!" Yuna said.
"Just punch in the number for the location." Shinra explained, as he handed her a hand-written code for each of the twelve commspheres, along with the six PCS units.
Yuna punched in the number for Besaid. Immediately a small screen appeared above her wrist. Yuna looked into it for a few moments. Eventually Wakka could be seen walking out of his hut. "Wakka!" Yuna called. "Wakka, over here!"
"Yuna!" Wakka exclaimed, quickly approaching the sphere. "You guys doing all right, ya?"
"Everything is great!" Yuna said. "Guess what?"
"What's up?"
"I can call you from anywhere! So you and Lulu don't have to worry about me, okay?" She smiled, Tidus peeked behind her shoulder looking into the screen.
"You keepin' an eye on her?" Wakka asked.
"Of course!" Tidus grinned, wrapping his arms around her waist as he rested his chin on her shoulder.
"Good!" Wakka gave him a thumbs-up.
"Talk to you soon Wakka. Tell Lulu I said hi!" Yuna waved at him.
"Be good now, ya?" He waved in return before the screen vanished into the unit.
Rikku poked at Tidus' shoulder, motioning towards Brother, who thankfully, still had his back turned to them. "You might wanna be careful for awhile." She warned.
"Right." Tidus whispered, squeezing Yuna gently before letting go of her.
"Khimari will be so happy to see you." She said gleefully. "I can't wait!" She paused for a moment. "You know, Khimari was the one who found that sphere. If it wasn't for him..." She began.
Rikku turned to Shinra. "Wait a minute! You said a minute ago Pops wanted one of these. Did he say why?"
"I don't know! I'm just a kid!" Shinra shook his head before plopping into his seat.
Rikku sighed. 'Anyway, it's getting late. Maybe we should get some sleep!"
"Maybe we should." Paine added.
"We'll land the ship at the Calm Lands and take you guys to Gagazet first thing in the morning." Buddy said. "Sound good Brother?"
"Rodger!" Brother cried, still elated from his previous contact with Yuna.
With that, the four headed towards the sleeping area. Rikku and Paine retired to their beds as usual, while Yuna crawled into hers, allowing Tidus to join her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. They gazed into each other's eyes momentarily before Tidus closed the gap between their lips with a gentle kiss. Yuna, not wanting to disturb her friends, let the kiss linger for a few moments before they parted their lips quietly. "Good night." She whispered into his ear.
"Sweet dreams." He whispered, placing another delicate kiss on her forehead.
The first deep cerulean hues of daybreak filtered into the cabin from the numerous glass panels above. It was just light enough for Yuna to find her way back to the bed in which she had become accustomed to for the past several months. She sat on the edge keeping her eyes on the sleeping form who had taken up most of the space on the bed while she was in the bathroom. She sighed slightly in frustration as she tried to gently push him over a little without disturbing his sleep. During the night, he had also managed to pull most of the blankets over him, leaving her curling up beside him for warmth. Yuna was finding it hard to cope with her new sleeping partner. In one last huff she pushed his torso over, hoping he would roll to his side. To her horror, he rolled completely over in the opposite direction, falling off the bed and hitting his head on the floor with a loud thump.
"Aaah!" His eyes flew open with a jolt as a throbbing pain echoed through his skull. He lied there for a moment trying to remember where he was. He last remembered lying on the bed next to Yuna. He wondered if he had somehow rolled off the bed on his own accord.
"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! Are you alright?" Yuna whispered to him before he had the chance to find out for himself.
"What happened?" He replied, mimicing her volume.
"I went to the bathroom and when I came back you were taking up the whole bed and I couldn't get in. I tried to push you over, but I guess I pushed you too hard and --"
"What's with you pushing me around all of a sudden?" He teased playfully. "If you keep it up, the only pushing you'll be doing is pushing me around in a wheelchair. That really hurt you know?" He winked at her before pulling the blankets back, allowing Yuna to crawl under them first. He then settled next to her, wrapping his arms around her waist and touching his nose to hers.
"I'm sorry."
"It's alright." He kissed the tip of her nose, causing her to smile. "Just don't make a habit out of it."
"Well, you have a habit of stealing the blankets." She complained with a playful tone touching the tip of his nose with her index finger.
"Do I really?" He smirked, yanking the blankets from her, rolling onto his other side. The cool air hit Yuna with a blast as the warmth escaped her.
"Hey!" She pulled at the blankets, unable to free them from Tidus, as he held on with a very tight grip. She stood and pulled at them from the opposite side of the bed, placing her foot on the wooden frame for extra strength. He laughed quietly in response before letting go. It sent her falling backwards, landing on her rear with another loud thump. Yuna decided to use this minor accident to her advantage.
"Owww..." She winced, rubbing her tail bone. She continued to lay there on her side feigning more pain that what she was actually feeling. A few seconds passed without any other audible movement. Tidus rolled over to check on her.
"Yuna?" He called, instantly noticing her condition. "Oh no... Did I hurt you?" He went to her at once kneeling at her side. He knew Yuna had most likely been through much more physical pain in the past two years, but he didn't want to be the cause of any of it. He intrinsically felt at fault. Though he knew she was a strong woman both emotionally and physically, he wanted to protect her from anything and everything that came her way. Perhaps it was still the guardian in him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it."
"I'll be okay." She said softly.
"Here, let me help you." He helped Yuna to her feet gently and led her to the bed, tucking her in gently. He then placed a tender kiss on her forehead and laid down beside her on top of the blankets, wrapping his arms over her just the same as he had before.
Yuna starred at him bewildered at his change in actions. He went from playful teenager to curteous gentleman in a matter of seconds. She wondered what kind of power she possessed to cause him to change so drastically. She let another minute or two pass before she decided to let him in from the proverbial dog-house. "You can get under the blankets with me now." She said.
"No!" He protested, pulling her close to him. "I don't want you to catch cold or get hurt because of me."
"Stop it." She giggled. "Just get under here with me. I don't want you to catch cold or hurt yourself either."
"Alright, Alright." He sat up and curled up next to her under the blankets pulling her next to him as close as possible. Another moment passed as he reached down her back towards her "injury". He placed his hand over it gently, causing Yuna's eyes to fly open. She started at him for a moment, unsure of how to react to his hands on such a personal area of her body. "Does it still hurt?" He whispered gingerly in her ear.
"Um... a little, I guess." She felt herself blush. If she was this nervous over him touching her bottom, she couldn't imagine what her reaction would be to him touching other areas. This thought immediately caused her to blush further.
"Want me to kiss it and make it all better?" He tried to stiffle a laugh before it escaped his throat.
Yuna wasn't sure how to respond, other than grabbing his hand immediately placing it back to her waist. She was thankful for the very dim blue light in the room, otherwise he would have seen her in twenty-seven shades of red.
"Kidding." He smirked.
It would be a few more hours before everyone on the ship would be awake, if they hadn't been awoken already by the racket they had just caused. Yuna decided that maybe there was nothing she had done herself. His actions simply defined who he was. The man holding her tightly in his arms was just as gentle and caring as he was playful and jubilant. She remembered for a moment how much more intereresting and enjoyable her journeys were when he was with her. She smiled at those thoughts. "This is definately going to be an interesting 'always', isn't it?" Maybe this was all just a part of the endless road of discovery they would walk together.She entwined her fingers with his before letting sleep overtake her once more.
Revision Notes:
8/5/05: Fixed a problem with the chapter listing. Whoops.