You've already won me over, in spite of me
Harry woke up with a start. He slowly sat up in his bed and breathed heavily in and out. His head was killing him. He silently got up and went to the bathroom, just to be sure. After ten minutes of unsuccessful toilet bowl hugging, he gave up, but his insides were still swirling.
He moved to the mirror on the wall. He was looking as bad as he felt. "This sucks" he told his reflection. His reflection only looked back sympathetically.
He didn't feel like going back to bed so he took his robe and went to the common room. He sat in an armchair by the lingering fire. He had had a vision, again.
He should just swallow his pride and go groveling to Snape. He should learn to do Occlumency. He had thought that it wouldn't be so urgent now, since both parties were aware of each other. Harry wouldn't believe anything he saw in his visions anymore. Besides, Voldemort knew Occlumency. He shut Harry out every time there was anything remotely interesting going on. Truthfully, the connection was shut most of the time and Harry didn't have problems dealing with it. But sometimes at night, when he was sleeping and most vulnerable, Voldemort would give him a 'treat'. He would let Harry see someone get tortured.
Like tonight. It had been a Death Eater, but Harry didn't know who. They had had their mask on. Harry didn't even know why he was tortured, Voldemort had only shown him the 'best bits', the sadistic bastard. Voldemort knew Harry couldn't stomach it.
He was feeling restless, like Ron was going to wake up any minute and come find him. He didn't want to be talking about this, because there was nothing to talk about. He couldn't fathom why Ron and Hermione always wanted to know every last detail of his visions. There were no hidden meanings or important details, it was just torture, and Harry didn't want to relive it with them.
So he got out of the common room, and headed towards the stairs. He would go to 'the room'. He hadn't been there tonight. He had tried to make up for his ridiculous outburst at the Great Hall the day before. He had been truly sorry, and Hermione had forgiven him. The three of them had sat down and discussed what was going on in their heads, why there was so much tension between them. Harry felt better now, even if they still didn't know about the prophecy.
Draco was there. Draco was bloody there. Draco was always bloody there!
"Coming in?" the blonde asked from the couch.
Harry quickly closed the door after him. "What are you doing here, this late?" Harry asked bewildered.
"I always stay here later than you" Draco replied.
"But it's one o'clock at night" Harry persisted while dropping himself next to Draco on the couch.
The blonde raised an eye brow at this, but didn't comment on it. Instead he replied "Actually closer to two, I think." He paused for a second. "I'm an insomniac. It comes and goes, but lately falling asleep in the Slytherin dormitory hasn't been so easy."
Harry hadn't really thought about it. Hell, he would have thought falling asleep in the Slytherin snake pit was hard at ordinary times, but now... Harry felt that uneasy feeling settle in his stomach again, like he was worried or something. He wanted to ask Draco more about it, but he got the feeling Draco wasn't really in the sharing mood.
"I have nightmares." Harry evidently was in the sharing mood. "More like visions really. About Voldemort torturing -"
"Torturing Death Eaters" Draco finished for him.
"You know about that?" Harry looked at his blonde companion.
Draco was staring right in front of him. "I vaguely remember you screaming about not wanting to see me get tortured" Draco explained. Then the blonde looked back at him. "Said it gave you a headache."
"Makes me sick to my stomach too" Harry added with a sad smile.
They fell into a comfortable silence. He couldn't help but wonder why he had told Draco about his nightmare. Hadn't he left the common room to avoid having to tell? He pondered if it was so easy to tell Draco these things, because he knew that Draco didn't care. Telling his friends who loved him and worried for him was harder.
'That's so messed up' he told himself. And somehow he got the feeling it wasn't completely true either.
He felt Draco rest his head on his shoulder and looked questioningly at the blond head.
Draco didn't even look up when he asked "Do you mind?" with a bored voice.
Harry shrugged his shoulders, making Draco's head bob.
"Don't do that" the slytherin reproached.
"Sorry" Harry whispered embarrassed. Then he leaned down a bit to get a better position on the couch. He didn't feel tired, but he was asleep 15 minutes later nevertheless."Wake up" Draco said shaking the gryffindor.
Harry woke up yawning and groaning. He had been very deeply asleep. Draco was now leaning on the desk of drawers. Harry sat slumped on the couch, trying to wake up.
"I have never heard anyone snuffle so much when they wake up" Draco said crossing his arms over his chest. "Bloody annoying really."
Harry's witty comeback got caught up in another yawn, so he went with a simple "What time is it?"
"It's almost six" Draco answered heading towards the door. "We should return to our dorms. Coming?" he added and held the door open for Harry.
"Did you sleep?" Harry asked as they walked along the corridor.
"Some" Draco answered.
"Good" Harry said aloud. Draco glanced at him and didn't say anything.
Harry was deep in thought, when he heard Draco voice from behind him.
"Potter, this way." Harry turned around to see Draco standing on the first steps of the stairway leading up to the gryffindor dormitory.
Harry took a moment to mock-examine his surroundings. "You know, I think you might not be wrong" he confessed.
Draco just rolled his eyes. "Come on, I'll walk you" he said and started climbing the stairs.
"You are going to walk me?" Harry asked. "To the seventh floor?" The slytherin didn't say anything.
'He really must not want to return to his dorm' Harry thought silently and felt a pang in his chest.
After a few staircases Draco spoke. "You know, you could just say it." Draco looked over his shoulder at Harry who was trailing a few steps behind him.
Harry ran the few steps to catch up. "Say what?" he demanded panting.
"That I was right" Draco said smugly. Harry looked at him questioningly. "Down there, you just couldn't say that I was right."
Harry thought back for a moment. "Well, it was nothing personal" he finally said. Draco snorted at that. "I guess, I'm just a bit tired of right and wrong at the moment. Good and bad, light and dark, white and black..." he tried to explain. "I like the shades of gray. That's where life dwells." He finished his prattling and realized he wasn't really making any sense.
"Life?" Draco was looking at him like he was retarded.
Harry grabbed Draco's arm and forced the blonde to face him. "Oh, don't tell me" he said with a concerned voice. "You don't know what life is."
Draco pulled free from Harry's grasp, annoyed. "What an idiot" he muttered to himself.
Harry ran a few steps again until he had caught up with Draco once more. "You know, your eyes are gray" he told the slytherin.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Draco asked defensively.
Harry looked at him frowning, trying to guess what was going through his blonde head. "Nothing. Just an observation" he replied finally.
They had arrived at the entrance to the Gryffindor common room. The Fat Lady was sleeping in her painting.
The boys walked up to the portrait. Draco was looking at it with disdain. "So this is your gate keeper" he whispered. Then he turned to Harry expectantly. "Well, go on."
Harry snorted. "I'm not going to say the password with you here, you arse" he whispered with humor.
They stared at each other waiting for the other to say something, or to do something. Harry saw Draco's eyes glance down at his lips. When the eyes came back to meet Harry's, the gryffindor couldn't take it anymore.
Harry stepped forward, grabbed a hold of Draco and brought their lips together. Draco's response was immediate as he opened his mouth to meet Harry's tongue. Draco grabbed Harry's waist and pulled Harry closer yet. Harry's hands were roaming around Draco's back, neck and hair.
Harry felt like he couldn't breathe, but it didn't really matter. It was a bliss, kissing Draco again. This kiss wasn't anything like the kisses they had shared before. This was so much more needy and wild, and Harry felt like he was loosing his mind. Harry wanted Draco to kiss him and touch him and anything him.
Draco turned them around and pushed Harry against the painting hanging on the wall.
"Ouch" Harry gasped as his back hit the painting frame, but he soon forgot about it as Draco was kissing and licking and nibbling his neck.
Harry heard someone mumble something, and instantly Draco stopped with his ministrations.
Draco looked at something above Harry's head and cursed. Then, without another word, he fled from the scene.
Harry turned around and saw the Fat Lady stirring in her portrait. He waited until he didn't hear anymore running footsteps from the stairway and knocked on the portrait with a sigh.
"Excuse me" he called out to the sleepy Fat Lady. "I'd like to get in. The password is Fiat Lux."
Title of the chapter from Head over feet by Alanis Morissette
"Kiss me, anything me..." I sort of remember something like that from the TV-series My so-called life with Claire Danes. I could be remembering wrong...
Fiat Lux is Latin for 'Let there be light'
A/n: In my mind, when Harry kissed Draco in this chapter, I always heard the little guitar melody from Nirvana's The man who sold the world (org. David Bowie). For the longest time I couldn't understand why it was, until I remembered an episode of Gilmore Girls, where (oh, I can't remember their names, no, wait... Lane. Aha! Well, who cares...) a boy kissed a girl, and it played in the background. How embarrassing!