I never said I wanted to be a man

Harry just stared back.

There was a soft knock on the door. "Draco, darling. Are you there?"

It was followed by heavy pounding. "Malfoy! What are you doing in the girls' bathroom?"

Draco swore quietly and looked back at Harry, obviously hoping that if they just kept quiet, the problem would solve itself.

Harry got slowly to his feet. He didn't really know what Draco was expecting him to do. He was still quite befuddled about what had happened five minutes ago. First Draco totally deserts him half-naked and embarrassed, then comes back and expects Harry to be concerned about his girlfriend finding about it.

So Harry didn't say anything, just went to retrieve his T-shirt from the floor.

Draco was pulling his sweater over his head with a panicked expression on his face.

"Draco" came a voice from outside. Harry decided it was Parkinson's. "Answer me. Why are you in there? Is there someone with you?"

Harry took his sweater from the door handle and pulled it over his head. Then he went to lean against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. He really didn't know why he wasn't more worried about this. They were cornered, after all. He looked at Draco, who was pacing in front of the door, nervously biting his nails and he felt a vindictive streak pass through him.

Draco came to a halt when he heard the girls try the Alomohora on the door. Luckily, Draco's spells held their own.

"Come on, Draco" Parkinson whined. "Just tell us."

Bullstrode decided to participate. "Is it that Patil? Parvati Patil?" she shouted.

Draco seemed to loose his cool. "A bleeding Gryffindork!" he shouted through the door. "Are you bloody kidding me?"

Harry burst out laughing, but tried to stifle it with his hand. He was a 'bleeding Gryffindork'.

Draco just shot him a deathly glare, which Harry promptly ignored.

A new voice was added to the mix. "What's going on in here?" a male voice asked.

"Shite, that's Nott" Draco whispered, looking even more worried now.

"Malfoy's got a girl in there" Bullstrode informed him.

"Who?" Nott asked.

"We don't know!" the two girls shrieked in unison.

"Oy, Malfoy!" Nott yelled. "Come out or we're coming in!"

"Go piss on yourself!" Draco yelled angrily.

Nott was starting to sound angry too. "If you don't open this door right now, I'm going to blast it open, you little peace of shit!"

"And Filch will have your head for it!" Draco yelled back.

"Not a bad idea." Nott sounded much calmer now. "Maybe we'll go get him now. I wonder what he'll think about you fornicating in the girls' bathroom?"

Harry was just shaking his head. He guessed he could just always open the Chamber of Secrets and hide there, but somehow the thought of sharing living quarters with a dead basilisk's remains wasn't appealing to him.

Draco glanced at Harry and hissed "Will you bloody stop that and help me?"

Harry tilted his head to the side irritatingly. "Oh, I don't know" he drawled. "The way you're digging the ground from underneath our feet, we'll be in China in no time at all."

"Bloody hilarious" Draco commented with a sardonic smile and lifted his index and middle fingers at the gryffindor.

"What are expecting me to do?" Harry hissed. "Shout 'Yeah, Draco's telling you the truth. There's no-one here except him!'?"

Draco breathed deeply. "No. I want you to come here" he said grabbing Harry by the wrist and pulling him to his side. "Now, on the count of three, you lift the spells and pull the door open and I Stupefy them."

"You'll get in trouble for it" Harry whispered.

"They're slytherins, I'm a slytherin" Draco explained. "They won't tell anyone anything because that would make us loose house points."

"They'll be mad" Harry whispered seriously, meaning the three slytherins pounding on the door and yelling profanities.

"For not telling who was here with me? They'll get over it" Draco whispered back. "Just stay behind the door so that they don't see you."

Harry nodded and they moved to position. On the count of three, Harry pulled the door open, hiding behind it, and Draco stunned the three surprised slytherins.

"I better get going" Harry said finally, stepping over the stunned bodies on the threshold.

Draco was observing his handiwork and glanced up nodding. Then he looked up again. "Potter, wait" he called after the gryffindor. "Come back. You look like you have just been at it with someone in the girls' bathroom."

Harry turned around and looked down at himself, but he thought he was looking just fine. Maybe not tidy, but fine. Nevertheless, he started tucking his shirt in his pants obediently.

Draco stepped up to him in order to help. "After I release these three, the rumor that I was doing it with someone will be all over the school. And if you go around looking like this, someone might put two and two together."

Harry highly doubted it but let Draco pet his hair anyway.

"Bloody hell, isn't there anything you can do about this mop?" Draco demanded frustrated.

"No" Harry answered, still a bit peeved. "Besides it would look more conspicuous, if it were tidy all of sudden."

"Ah" Draco exclaimed, and immediately seized with his efforts, letting his hands drop to his side.

Harry glanced over Draco's shoulder at the immobile bodies. "If this turns out poorly, I'm not coming forward."

"You better fucking not" Draco answered seriously.

Harry let a heavy breath out. "Fine" he said tiredly and turned on his heels and walked away.

He heard Draco call "What?" after him, but he just waved back without turning around and kept on walking.

Title of the chapter from The air near my fingers by The White Stripes

The whole bathroom scene was inspired by the movie Fucking Åmål by Lukas Moodysson. I hope nobody was offended. It is a tribute, nothing else.

To RayneWolf: Thanks for the heads up. I'll try to be careful.