Part 21: A Mile in their Shoes
Summary:
When Paris acts as First Officer and Chakotay acts as the Captain as Tuvok, B'Elanna and Kathryn become drones to stop the Borg Queen from destroying Unimatrix Zero, each gets an appreciation for the job of their superior Officers during this kind of mission. (J/C, P/T)
Pairing:JC, P/T Rating: PG-13 Type of Story: Reflective Level: 2
Part 21: A Mile in their Shoes
This is going to be one of those days.
It was the first thought that hit him when he came back to the bridge.
It was supposed to be a good day, a day of celebration. When he reminded the Captain during their monthly personnel meetings that Tom Paris had been an Ensign for a year and he should be reinstated to his previous rank, her first remark was one of amazement. She hadn't realized it had been a year already. She had reviewed the Ensign's personnel file and found no other incidents or reports for the entire year, not even being late for duty. So there was no problem. Well actually there was one problem, but that presented itself when they were on the bridge. Harry Kim was still an Ensign.
Chakotay had known that the Operations Senior Officer was tired of being the lowest ranking officer on the ship. He could tell by his actions that the experiences that Harry had in the Delta Quadrant awakened a thirst in him for Command. But there was no need of lieutenants at this time and hopefully they would not be short of any in the future so he was stuck at his present rank. And in order to enter Command, he needed to be a lieutenant or above. Chakotay resolved to find other ways to nurture his development in the two paths, but officially there was nothing they could do.
Tom was reinstated on the Bridge that very day. Chakotay saw the pride in the younger man's eyes and the commitment that he made again, there and then, to give them his best. The Captain was very proud of him that day. All had been forgiven. Chakotay was glad that she didn't just dismiss Tom when he made the choices that he did back on the Ocean Planet. Tom has been one of their best people and he was happy to see him reinstated. He remembered a time when he was waiting for the devil-may-care young man to fail. Now he was happy to be proven wrong.
So for him at had been a good start should have been an ordinary day in the Delta Quadrant, but something happened that made him realize that the day was going to end differently.
The found an outpost destroyed by the Borg.
His hackles were not the only ones to go up. He could practically feel the Captain's shoulders squaring and hear her stomach churning. That should have been the end of it. With the colony destroyed, there was no need to render assistance. They resumed the course towards Earth. Still he was waited for the other shoe to drop. And then it did. Seven of Nine came in with a distress call obtained from a very unusual source and in a very unusual manner. Some drones in the Collective had found a way to retain their individuality and she wanted to help them mount an even more effective resistance against the Borg.
On the plus side, wanting to help the Borg Resistance showed how far Seven had really come to value her humanity and her individuality. Or maybe she just really wanted to stick it to the Borg Queen seeing all the hell that she put Seven through. But whatever the reason, she wanted to help the drones and Chakotay, knowing Kathryn, could smell the plan as it began fermenting in the Captain's head. She needed more information, so she went on one of the more interesting away missions that any one of them could ever hoped to be on.
So here he was in the middle of what started off as a routine day knowing that by its end he would either be in one of the more extraordinary adventures he'd had here in the Delta Quadrant, or it wouldn't matter one way or the other how the day started because they would all be either assimilated or dead at its end. He knew it was coming. There was just one thing missing. Chakotay had been watching Kathryn intently as she listened to Seven speaking. He saw her eyes sparkle, he saw her mind begin its calculation, he saw the anticipation in her whole body but what he didn't see was the fiddling with her Combadge.
Chakotay chucked. He was sure that he would see it soon enough. Now he was just sitting there looking at the viewscreen. She would be back as soon as she completed her away mission. Normally he would try to bury himself in reports, but he knew that never worked so this time he didn't even try. Instead he began thinking about his answer to the inevitable question that was going to be posed when she spoke to him.
Are you with me?
He made the mental check list
Alien:The Borg
Plan: Risky. Will involve putting the Captain in danger, possibly Seven and maybe no one else
Advantages; Help the Borg underground, deal a crippling blow to the Collective
Disadvantages: (1) Against protocol
(2) Could get them assimilated or killed
(3)Captain may die.
Number three was always the problem. Far from being just the Captain, Kathryn was his best friend…….and more. He couldn't imagine life on this journey without her and everything in him wanted to do what a First Officer was supposed to do best; protect the Captain. The only way the Captain was supposed to go down was if the ship went down. But with Janeway, getting her to be on the ship when it went down was always a problem. Kathryn was the most pigheaded when it came to dangerous missions and away teams. The more dangerous the mission outside the ship, the more she wanted to lead the away team and the smaller she wanted that away team had to be.
The loss of the Captain to the crew would be one of the most insurmountable obstacles that they would ever have to face in the Delta Quadrant. The loss of Kathryn would be devastating and he wasn't sure that he would ever be the same after that.
But that was something he thought about every time that she got that look in her eye. Every time she told him of her plans and when he realized how risky they were, that fear came back to him.
Suppose this is the time.
Every time he got her back safe and sound he thanked the Spirits.
But still, he was only the first Officer and she the Captain. Their first duty was to the crew and not to each other. Helping the Borg underground stage a coup and a revolution in the collective could only help them with their passage through space. It could also help ward out future attacks against Earth. And that was the reason that he had to endorse the plan that she came up with. Because of the gain to them, to the races in the Delta Quadrant and to the alpha quadrant, he would endorse it. But as a best friend all he wanted to do was just hide her away someplace safe and warp them out of there. And maybe it was a good thing that their roles weren't reversed.
The needs of the many……
Chakotay caught her look as she came out to the bridge. He didn't like it. "How's your headache?" Kathryn didn't speak but she made the universal Captain gesture for
My ready room now.
He looked at Kathryn as he walked into the Ready Room behind the Captain. The shoulders were fully squared and his heart sunk lower. But when she went on the upper deck as he stood on the lower, he noticed her expression and realized in this one instant, the decision was not made yet. It surprised him that she would be using him as a sounding board before the decision was made. He stood at ease.
"I'm guessing it didn't go well." He began
"Let's just say we ran into a little trouble. Have a seat, Commander." Almost as an after thought and then Chakotay could actually see her struggle trying to put her thoughts in order to address him.
"I prefer to stand." He knew it was coming and suddenly in his mind's eye he saw himself standing in his quarters watching a fight a year ago waiting for his life to end. Why did it feel like that now, and why did he suddenly feel he had more control over the outcome of this decision than he did the one that caused him to be in his quarters during that time in the first place?
Kathryn wasn't even looking at him when she began.
"The Collective's found a way to infiltrate Unimatrix Zero. It won't be long before they learn enough to destroy it from the inside out. I plan to stop them."
She turned as she was speaking, and leaning over the railing, she stood directly in front of him.
"What have you got in mind?" He kept the expression off his face. He didn't know how much mental discipline he would need when she finally informed him the plan of attack that they would be engaging in.
"The people there are vulnerable. They don't have the ability to take action in the real world. We're going to give them that ability."
"How?"
"The Doctor and B'Elanna are working on it." Chakotay's eyes widened at that. Nothing was concrete yet. Why was he was part of this discussion at such an early stage?
Kathryn began to pace. "I know what you're thinking. We'd be violating half a dozen Starfleet protocols. And if the Collective ever learned we were involved, we'd be putting Voyager in the middle of a civil war." She raised her arms, because if that was what he was thinking he had her dead to rights. "Valid objections."
Chakotay said nothing, because while he had thought of it before, that was not on his mind at that moment.
She turned to face him and closed the gap between the two of them. Her face this time was almost unreadable and held a look that Chakotay hadn't seen in a long time when it came to making command decisions.
"Chakotay...we've had our disagreements. And there have been times when I've chosen to proceed without your support. But this can't be one of those times. I won't do this without my first officer."
Whoa.
Of all the things that he had planned for, and had expected to hear, this was not it. Finally command decisions about the Borg on her end, could be done without them engaging safety protocols in the form of a heated argument. And the Captain had started to do what he had always pleaded with her to do in the first place. To step back from the situation, and take a look at the big picture. Not only had she done so, but she had done so with him. A rush of warmth flooded him. They really had come a long way in terms of making this command structure work. All of the major hurdles they had to cross in terms of building the trust between them were worth it if the end result was to bring her to the point where she was at now.
He chose his words carefully. "The way I see it, risking the safety of Voyager is a small price to pay. If we help these people, this could be the turning point in our battle against the Borg."
He did his part to ensure that the promise made almost half a year ago still held. That the incident that led them to making that promise was the last time that they stopped trusting each other. He gave her his support and his trust right then and there, even though he didn't know what the plan was.
He knew he surprised her. She smiled slightly "I'm glad we agree--because I almost talked myself out of it."
Who did she think she was fooling? "Somehow, I don't think you were ever in danger of doing that."
"You'll inform the crew?" He gave a quick nod and left to do just that. But he was a little puzzled. Normally, they would call all the senior officers to the conference room and inform them together. Why was she leaving him to do it on his own? He smiled as he crossed the bridge and called the senior staff. She knew she had his support, it didn't matter who told the bridge officers and apparently she had wanted a moment alone. He took a moment himself as he waited for the rest of the staff to report to the conference room. Something momentous had occurred in the ready room in terms of both their professional and personal relationship. But he knew that they had a ways to go yet. He had no idea what the plan would entail and he didn't know if he had given his support now, only to withdraw it in good conscience later. But one thing he did know was that when that moment came, they would face it together. It was a lot more than he had to go on before.
It was only when the door closed that Kathryn let the relief that she felt show on her face. Why is it that the most uncertain and unpredictable part of the plan when Voyager engaged the Borg seem to involve the relationship between its two top Commanding Officers. She knew what she wanted to do, and she knew he was right, she wouldn't have tried to talk herself out of it. She only tried hard to make herself believe that she would. She definitely would have tried to convince him to see things her way. But what she would not have tried was to go off and do it on her own without him. That part she meant. Too many bad things occurred when she ignored completely the advice and support of her Number One. She was determined not to ignore the lessons that she had learnt during her first six years with Chakotay on Voyager. And she realized, so was he.
The moment was here again.
Chakotay wondered if Kathryn was feeling the same déjà vu that he was.
The part that concerned him the most was the plan itself; allowing the Captain to become assimilated in order to spread the virus. Kathryn realized they were more lucky than good when it came to dealing with the Borg and she knew that it was the only way to ensure that the virus was uploaded to the central plexus. To think that they would be able to infiltrated a heavily armed Borg Cube and not be assimilated was to say the least over confident and the most; arrogant. At least she had formulated all the necessary contingencies. It was risky, but all relevant avenues had been covered.
The concern and the behavior of the other senior officers were causing him to smile inwardly. Outwardly he kept a straight face.
"Can't we find another Borg ship?" The doctor was pleading with her "A sphere, maybe? Something less imposing?"
"I rechecked long-range sensors," B'Elanna spoke, and her expression almost like one he had seen on the Captain hundreds of times. "There's nothing."
Kathryn's mind was made up. "This is our target. You'll keep a transporter lock on me. Once I make it to the central plexus and release the virus, you can beam me back."
"In how many pieces? It's ridiculous!" The Doctor was as close to losing it as any organic being ever was. When did they ever doubt that he was less human than any one of them?
"Agreed, I should go. I'm the only one with experience." And he knew why Seven was saying that. She was the one who asked Voyager to help the drones in Unimatrix zero in the first place. Kathryn had taught her well. Her desire for self sacrifice was almost as strong as the Captain's…almost.
"You're our only connection to Unimatrix Zero. You're needed here. It was my decision to help these people. This is my responsibility." And then he knew why she was proposing to do this alone. If anything, she would be left behind as a drone. The rest of them would escape and make their way home under his command. She would not lose another member of her crew to the Delta Quadrant as a result of her decisions. But what she didn't realize was that she was also a member of that crew as well as its head, and if that particular scenario played out, they would have to live with the knowledge that they lost the most important member of their crew to the Delta Quadrant, and that was unacceptable.
As far as Kathryn had come in the last six years, he didn't know if she would ever make the leap of faith to believe that when the crew said that they were in it together, they were in it together. To the death, the alpha quadrant, or assimilation; which ever came first.
"Starfleet Tactical Directive 36: 'The captain will not engage a hostile force without the protection of a security officer.' The probability of success is greater if there are two of us."
Tuvok was the first to make that known. He and Chakotay were possibly the only ones who knew the real reason that Kathryn to taking this course of action.
"Make that three. If you're going to pull this off you'll need an engineer in there."
Those were the words that normally came along with that particular expression on B'Elanna's face that he had noted before. To the death in a glorious battle. Unfortunately, she was not as alone as she used to be. Fortunately, her actions would have a profound effect on another.
Her man's eyes went wide. No way in hell, could be practically read in them. "B'Elanna..."
"Tactical directive 36-A," B'Elanna said. The expression still there. Chakotay wondered idly if Kathryn was proud at how well she had trained those two women under her command and how strong of a family she was the head of. What did Tom think he was going to accomplish by protesting?
"There is no directive 36-A!"
"There is now."
Kathryn would have none of it, but Chakotay knew that the offer touched Kathryn deeply and strengthened her resolve to only put her life in direct risk. "I appreciate the offer. But if that cube attacks Voyager you'll be needed here." She looked around at all the officers around her, but she didn't look at him. "Now you have your orders. Set a course, Mr. Paris." And she was out of there. They all looked at him as she left. Tom's and the Doctor's eyes were pleading, Seven's and B'Elanna's eyes were resolute in their glance and as he turned to follow Kathryn out, he caught Neelix trying hard to keep that look that said This ought to be good off his face.
They were all depending on him to do something. To talk some sense into her and he would not disappoint although the end result might not what all of them hoped for.
He caught up with her in the corridor "Remember when I said I didn't have any objections?"
"Can't this wait till I get back?" Kathryn was hoping to escape with minimum objections from him. She had hoped that when she dropped the bombshell on what she had wanted to do, that he would just have let it go, figuring that he had given her carte blanch to go ahead with whatever the plan was in the ready room. She should have known better.
"I realize I'm not going to talk you out of this, but I'll be damned if you're going in there alone."
"We've got a lot of work to do, Commander--"
"You said you wanted my support. Then take Tuvok and B'Elanna with you." He turned to face her and she stopped to face him, wondering if he was really serious. She saw in a glance that he was.
"And if I don't?" She had to throw down some gauntlet to him. But when he uttered that statement, not one disagreeing with the plan, but calling for her not to lead an away team of one, she realized hen why she had wanted to go down there alone.
Her Number One shrugged "I may only be first officer, but I still pull a few strings around here. The Doctor could be persuaded to question your medical fitness . . ."
"I was hoping for your unconditional support."
Her best friend shrugged. "This is the best I can do."
He had spotted her motivation for going down there alone and he was telling her gently, how much she meant to this crew and to him and how far he was willing to go to stop her if necessary. Whether he intended to do what he said was irrelevant. She had made a promise. She wasn't going to do this without his support.
"Tell them to pack light."