Tom's face was grim as he continued monitoring his controls. How could he have even thought at one time that the Captain and the Commander were having a relationship? A man who was truly in love with a woman would not leave her like that just so that she could fulfill some stupid mission. The only reason that B'Elanna was still over there was because he was under orders and he knew that he couldn't beam her out without starting a full scale war both outside and inside the ship.
Seemly satisfied with that answer to himself, Tom took a deep breath and calmed down. He had needed to get that thought out of his system. Maybe there was more to what he was feeling that he just didn't want to acknowledge. He trusted the big guy to do what was right for all involved. He didn't know how he got there, but he did. He was just blowing off steam, because no matter what he thought, he knew that Chakotay was having a hard time right now.
Tom stole a look at him in the Commander's chair. His face was set and it betrayed nothing. He wondered if Chakotay were waiting with even one-third of the anxiety that he was. He supposed he had to have at least that amount. The two people who he was closest to were on that cube. It had to be affecting him. Tom reflected that he finally understood what it felt like to be in the position that Chakotay often found himself. Waiting as the one officer who could change the mind of the Captain, and trusting in her to do right for all parties involved.
How many times had the rest of them look to him to talk some sense into the Captain when she got 'a mad bee in her bonnet'?. How many times did he have to make the judgment call to do exactly that or to support her to the crew? He had to weigh everything that was at stake and deliver his judgment into action even when he was given his orders and he didn't agree with the decision. The Captain was the Captain, and he just the First Officer. He had to find a way to deal with what he thought was right and stand by the Captain for the good of the crew. Tom felt a little sheepish when he recalled Chakotay's last words to him. Chakotay has never ever have to ask that of him as the Commander and he, the Helmsman, but as the Captain to the First Officer he had to, and Tom was beginning to realize just how much being First Officer called for exactly that, support and trust.
He knew that Chakotay and the Captain had often come to this point in the road. From what he saw of the two of them, their styles of command were much different. But they always overcame their differences for one thing and one thing only; the good of the crew. Even when that good meant the possible sacrifice of crewmen for the safety of them all. Tom was beginning to realize how much being a command team involved trusting the other to perform their duty in the face of great personal loss. No matter what, Tom knew that he couldn't forget that B'Elanna had volunteered for this mission, Chakotay had not sent her. In order to make the outcome not be in vain, they had to give them the opportunity to finish the mission, that's what B'Elanna and the Captain wanted and that's what they had to do.
Tom shook his head when he realized what had just happened. He had completely reasoned his way into Chakotay's view point of view. It took him a step closer to understanding what was truly important in this crazy mission, that they support the women that they cared for deeply, and protect what they had built for themselves on Voyager. Tom looked down at hat point, he didn't know why, but he felt as if he had just walked a mile in the Commander's boot. And it was an uncomfortable walk, even though it was an enlightening one.
Something's wrong.
Chakotay stood, he didn't know how he knew that and he didn't think he wanted to know.
"There's a problem with Commander Tuvok. His synaptic pathways are destabilizing." The Doctor reported with the alarm at what the monitors were telling him being apparent in his voice.
Now
All of Chakotay's being resonated with that thought as he advanced towards the Conn, towards the young man whom he knew was holding on to duty with his dear life, willing the fear away that must have increased four fold with the Doctor's pronouncement, at bay.
"If I decide to move in closer I assume my First Officer would concur."
"You assume correctly." Tom replied and with a few commands, he took Voyager to warp in pursuit of the Borg Cube.
Tom called out their distance as if doing so would hasten Harry in transporting them out.
"Range: 40,000 kilometers."
"Harry?" They were in range, Chakotay prayed for a miracle.
Harry couldn't oblige "Too much shielding around the central plexus. I can't get a lock."
"Stay on it." As if he had to tell Harry that. He already knew that the Operations Officer's brains and fingers were flying over controls and simulations in order to get the away team out. He wouldn't forgive himself if he wasn't able to do it, but he needed help.
Chakotay looked at his acting first officer "Closer." He didn't have to say it twice.
"Target their shield generators. Stand by phasers."
Tom looked up as his sensors detected the beginning of the oncoming onslaught.
"Commander" He alerted the commander to it.
This was it.
He prayed that he would be able to get the crew through this for all their sakes.
"Shields to full. Brace for impact."
And then the unthinkable happened.
"Someone's accessing our tactical controls. Our shields are down!" Harry shouted as the bridge controls began fluctuation to confirm everything he just said.
Chakotay went cold and mentally shut down every emotion the he had experienced in the past two hours, and he rerouted all the energy to his thought processes as he had done countless times on the Liberty and on Voyager.
"Evasive maneuvers."
The torpedo landed and brought destruction in its wake.
"Sensors are off-line! I've lost the away team!" The Doctor shouted over the din as explosions rocked the bridge.
"Hull breaches--decks five, six, seven!" Unfortunately Harry's report was the one he knew that he had to act on.
The bridge exploded again from residual surges brought on by the onslaught. His path was clear.
"Reverse course."
His acting First Officer, just couldn't act any more. "We can't just leave them."
Chakotay was still the Captain, but he did take a moment to acknowledge the helmsman's pain with his words.
"The Borg have our access codes. Get us out of here." And with his command, he returned to his seat. Tom took a deep breath, his heart now out of his chest and on his sleeve breaking as he punched in the commands. Chakotay noticed, but he had spent his last ounce of emotion left on the young man, so he was on his own. Chakotay had repairs to make, a plan to come up with and an away team to rescue without putting the ship into more danger than was necessary, he didn't have time for the luxury of giving into his anxiety and worry, which like Tom's had increased tenfold.
"Several drones have reported that they retained their memories of Unimatrix Zero after their regeneration ended. The virus has been deployed." Seven seemed a little concerned seeing the bridge in that shape, she must not have realized how bad the last attack was.
"Good. We're going to need all the help we can get. The away team's still trapped on that cube." Chakotay allowed a small amount of the emotion relief to flood through him and then he cut it off. The bridge was dark and smoking from their last attack, but at least there was hope.
"And as you may have noticed we're in no shape to mount a rescue." He could also hear the hope in Harry's voice when he answered Seven.
"Can you get back in and find out if they have anybody else aboard this cube?" At least they were thinking along the same wavelength now.
"If they do, tell them to hurry. They're the only allies we've got." And he knew that they were going to need them if they were to have any hope of rescuing the away team.
He was fuming. After getting partial systems back on line, there was a call from sickbay and he had to get down there with Seven. Whatever this was, it was one more thing that went wrong today. He wasn't sure how much more he could stand. He swallowed his worry and put his command face on. He had ordered Seven to do so before; it would not do them any good if he himself couldn't act as he had dictated them to.
He stopped short when he came into sickbay and saw what had to be a holo-projection of the Captain standing there. His heart got caught in his throat. No one but her, if she could see him, would have realized that.
"Kathryn?" He said it softly. If Seven realized how inappropriate the use of the Captain's first name was at that time, she gave no outward manifestation of it.
"The Borg have established this link so I could propose a compromise." Kathryn's face was inscrutable and it should be. If there is one thing he knew that Kathryn would never do, was compromise with the Borg. She'd risk assimilation first. It put him on his guard.
"We're listening." He said it evenly.
"They've developed a nanovirus that can kill every Borg with the mutation. They're prepared to release it inside Unimatrix zero unless all the drones there return to the Collective for re-assimilation immediately." Her face did not change as she said this. He was beginning to suspect that there was another reason why she had been willing to compromise.
"That's not compromise--that's surrender." It was Seven who spoke up, purposely and harshly.
"I won't be responsible for any more deaths. At least they'll survive as drones. Tell them Unimatrix zero can no longer exist. That's an order." And with the Captain's statement, he understood everything. He was silent as his mind raced ideas on how to fulfill her order.
"Have I made myself clear, Commander?" Chakotay knew that she had to make sure that he got the message.
"Yes, Captain." And he knew at once the she realized he had understood what she had ordered him to do. Kathryn disappeared as the link was severed.
"We did our best." The Doctor was trying to re-assure Seven, trying to soften the blow that surrender would land.
"It's not over yet, Doctor." He was the only one who really understood the Captain's orders. He spoke to Seven, "Can you disrupt the interlink frequency for Unimatrix zero?"
"Commander...The Captain gave us a direct order."
"Yes, she did, but not the one you think. Seven?"
"I believe I can, but why?"
"Didn't you hear? Unimatrix zero can no longer exist." And with that statement, he knew that they finally got it.
The ship jerked as soon as he finished his explanation, he slapped his combadge.
"Chakotay to the Bridge, report!"
He was the ranking officer on the bridge and the duty to do as the Commander asked fell on him. Tom answered.
"A transwarp conduit just opened off our port bow." Neelix tapped in the signal and activated the viewscreen. "Lieutenant." He called Tom's attention to the sphere on screen.
Harry called out to him, in the same way that he would have called out to the Captain or the Commanders if they had been on the bridge. "They're on an intercept course."
Tom's mind snapped into place. "Evasive maneuvers."
He took his seat on the Captain's chair. What happened next was subtle and he wouldn't realize it until everything had settled down and he had time to think. He began to focus not only on B'Elanna but on all the members of the away team and all the crew on Voyager. Until Chakotay came to the bridge, it was up to him to hold it all together and to protect the home that they had built here in the Delta Quadrant. It would take him all of a day after the danger had passed, to recognize what happened to him in the instant that he sat in the Big Chair. How much he understood what went on when Command decisions were made, and how much he really didn't think he ever wanted that responsibility again, because in an instant he understood the burden of Command and the loneliness that went with it. For an instant he understood the Captain and the Commander a little better and unbeknownst to him in that instant, he re-committed himself to doing his best to ensure the safety of their crew.
"Battle stations." His voice was strong now.
"They're hailing us."
"Open a channel." He was ready to stare down the Queen herself. Instead he got……
"Starship Voyager. I am general Korok. This vessel is now under my command. We've come to join you in battle."
A miracle.
And
'What a miracle' was the thought that Chakotay had as he made it through the corridor to Sickbay. He was happy to once again put his heart back in his chest. The mission was over and it seemed that the Queen was too busy to come out and make Voyager pay for what they had done to the Collective. Or perhaps she just figured that she needed to get her own house in order before coming after them. But whatever it was, he was just glad to have seen the end of the Collective this time. He knew that there would be a next time. There always was.
Before he was able to enter Sickbay, the doors opened and let Seven of Nine out. She had a puzzling look on her face and it was then that the Commander realized that she was going through a hard time with the destruction of Unimatrix Zero. She had lost a lot of friends there.
He stopped short when he saw Kathryn in the midst of PADDs and a computer station, and he smiled at the cup of coffee in her hand. She looked up in time to catch it.
"What's so funny?" She demanded. It was music to his ears, she was really back.
"Doctor, didn't you order complete rest for the Captain?" Chakotay's dimples came into play as he spoke.
"I did, but you know how she is." The Doctor's dry sarcastic comment came softly from the direction of Tuvok's biobed. B'Elanna was asleep in between them.
"Let me help you with that." Chakotay came closer and shut off her computer.
"Oh no you don't," She exclaimed, grabbing the PADDs. "I'm still Captain of this ship and it is my duty to ensure that ship's systems are being repaired efficiently."
"Maybe" He said cautiously, as he dragged an empty tray table towards her bed. When he was finished, he went to the replicator and keyed in a few buttons.
"But you should at least take time to eat." He reappeared with a tray and two dinners covered down. He went back to the replicator and got the drinks.
"Oh Chakotay," Kathryn was beaming as he set the dinners down on the trolley and got a chair for himself. Her stomach rumbled at the scent of dinner. And she realized that she hadn't eaten for the day.
Her first bite was pure heaven. "Forget the carpets and the gravity plating, this is what I needed waiting for me when I got back. Thanks." He nodded and focused on his own food.
A thought came to Kathryn as she was eating. Actually it was the same thought that she had before she left to go on her away mission. She stared at Chakotay as if really seeing him for the first time and for the first time in a long while a sweet longing over took her. She indulged in it for a moment before swiftly chasing it away. What she had here was enough.
"How's the crew holding up?" She slid herself back into the role of Captain and forced them back into the Command relationship that she enjoyed so much.
"Overjoyed now that everyone is back on board." Chakotay smiled as a thought hit him.
"I have to admit it was a little tough on some, especially on my acting First Officer."
Kathryn did the mental calculations and deduced who he was talking about. "Tom?"
"I noticed that you recommended that he not be left in a position of command when B'Elanna was on an away mission unless absolutely necessary." Kathryn began carefully.
"I know that you wouldn't do it normally, but incase you were thinking about it and I wasn't there, I wanted the record to show that."
"But you also put in a commendation for the entire bridge crew for the way they handled themselves on the mission, including him?"
"He held himself together Kathryn and he pulled through. I know that I didn't have to worry about him following orders, but……"
"There were a number of times that he got to you and almost derailed you from doing what you had to do." Chakotay looked at her in shock, "How did you know?"
"I am the Captain, Chakotay." And with that statement he realized how much he had stepped into her role on this mission.
Kathryn went back to eating and Chakotay joined her in silence. When they had finished, Chakotay cleared the dishes and refreshed their beverages.
"I suppose I should tell you thank you." His face was dark and mysterious as he regarded her.
"Why, for going off and almost getting myself killed and Voyager assimilated." Kathryn gave a short laugh.
Chakotay remained serious. "For putting up with me as a First Officer, at least in the beginning."
"What are you talking about?" Kathryn was concerned. "You're an excellent First Officer, in fact when we get back, I'm not sure that I'm going to replace you with a Starfleet issue." She tried to make light of it, but Chakotay wasn't buying.
"Tom, put me through a little of what I have put you through over the years on this mission."
"I hope that you put into practice all those lessons that you learnt from me, especially the lessons learned from my mistakes." Kathryn said ruefully. That shook him out of it.
"Yes I did."
"Then you did far better in the big chair than I have."
Chakotay's eyes went wide. "Somehow I doubt that." That earned him a chuckle from the Captain.
There was a low moan on the next biobed and they heard the Doctor call out.
"Doctor to Lieutenant Paris, she's awake."
"Acknowledged."
"Paris to Chakotay." Chakotay grinned. "I heard the Doctor, Lieutenant. Have Bethart relieve you and report to Sickbay. Consider it your last official order as acting First Officer."
"Yes ma'am." Chakotay did a double take, but before he could answer, Kathryn beat him to the punch.
"Janeway to Paris"
"Yes Captain."
"I heard that!"
Tom smiled broadly as he heard that comment entering the turbo lift. Maybe he was right about that pool after all.
When he entered sickbay and took note of the smiles and laughter coming from the bed where the Captain and first Officer were, it cemented his belief.
"Captain, Commander." He acknowledged them quickly, he had other matters that he wanted to concentrate on.
"Hey," he said as he looked down on B'Elanna on the bed.
"Hey yourself," she said weakly in answer.
"Don't try to talk, you're still weak, I just wanted to be at your side when you woke up." The Doctor rolled his eyes when Paris said that. There seemed to be a lot of that going around, he stole a glance at the Captain and the Commander in the other bay. And unexpectedly he smiled as he worked and began humming an opera tune softly. He didn't want to disturb what was going on all around him.
Neither noticed when Chakotay and Kathryn stopped talking and were silent. Kathryn leaned her head towards the biobed where B'Elanna and Tom were smiling at each other.
"It must have been hard on him, harder than the rest of you." Kathryn mused.
"It was." Chakotay said simply. "That's the reason why even though unwritten the protocols for fraternization when serving on the same starship in Command positions are strict." He continued. Kathryn looked at him sharply, but she softened her look. Chakotay had been concentrating on taking a drink so he missed her initial gaze.
"Are you saying that you weren't even worried about me over there?" She asked slyly.
"Why should I've been? A battle between you and the Borg, I know who'd win every time." Kathryn was quiet and Chakotay wondered why she was taking this so seriously. She looked sad, so he reached out and touched her hand gently.
"Kathryn, of course I was worried about you especially, and not just as a First Officer, but as your best friend. It's enough for me, I couldn't imagine having command resting squarely on my shoulders and having to deal with my beloved being on that type of dangerous away mission also."
What was startling Kathryn, was that she found herself running scenarios imagining her behavior in that very same instance because somehow being his best friend and Commanding Officer was not enough for her any more.
The end
Part: 22 The Night they were Wed