Life Without My Lover
By
kittynboots47834
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the InuYasha Characters...but I wish I did...sigh
I felt the cool breeze brush my hair, blowing it into my face. Knowing that one day I would loose him, I started to become more active in his life. Maybe I was right or wrong. I couldn't really tell. Sesshomouru wasn't like all the others, kind and gentle was his personality. Sesshy's kiss was more than enough to chill me or paralyze me to the floor. The first time we kissed, it was like heaven on earth, but it was the last. Now ever since then, he has been dead, lost forever. I keep searching for him, hoping that he isn't dead. Gone, out of my life. Feeling him in my dreams and everywhere around me, I knew he wasn't gone. He had left me permanently alone in a cold world that I knew that I would never find anyone else like him, again. His love, his touch, everything about him was just right for me. Oh, do I miss him so much.
I remember it like it was just yesterday. Coming home from work, an interview for the paper, I had knocked on the door. Three times. No answer. I decided to ring the bell. Nothing. Forgetting that I had hid the spare key under the mat, I grabbed the mat and pulled the corner of it up. There was the tiny silver key that unlocked the door and its dead-lock. Slowly turning the handle, I cracked the door. Peeking into the room, I noticed the lights were off, all except one. It was dim, but on. I flipped the switch only to scream. Lying on the floor was my lover, covered in crimson liquid. Running over to him, I heard a gasp for air.Sesshy was alive.
Alive, but only for a few minutes, I thought. He grabbed my hands and kissed them. The blood on his lips left his lip imprints on my hand. " I love you...very...much...Kag..." Sesshoumaru stopped. I cried and ran out of the room. Running towards the hallway, I knew this was all my fault. If I would have stayed home...If only I...If only... Those were the last things that I said and thought to myself. " If only..."
Those words kept repeating in my head. It was all my fault, I had left to get things for our apartment. That still haunts me and get over the fact that it was all my fault. I still dream of him.
Know and then I see his face in the window when it rains. I stare through the glass that separates us. My hand goes up to the cold and damp window.Sesshoumoru face is still there and his hand silhouetting mine. This time the warmness of his hand gave me another sense. Sesshy was alive and not gone from me. I started to cry like the rain storm outside my window. Gushing tears from my eyes, he smiled and kissed the window, leaving an imprint. Lightening flashed and Sesshoumaru was gone. The rain stopped pattering against the window. The face and everything was his, even the warmness was his. I knew his even if he was standing far away from me.
Deep inside, I was yearning to go and fine the man I loved, but there was another part of me that told me not to go and just to move on with my life. I decided to go and find him. It might as well be love that drew me insane. I loved him and there was nothing that would change that.
AN: Thanks for everyone who has supported me through the hard times of life...( Voices: shaking heads yes) Thnx guys! Kitty