Chandler followed Joey into the hallway and looked concerned. "You okay? I thought you remembered her."

Joey shook his head and pouted. "I should have! I should've remembered. What's wrong with me?"

Chandler hugged him. "It's okay, man. It was like six years ago."

"But if you can remember Kate, then I should too, right?" Pulling away from Chandler, Joey said, "She was different! She was... I mean, remember how Phoebe's scientist guy left for Russia and broke her heart? That's how it was when Kate left for L.A., only she never came back. The only time I saw her after that was when she was on General Hospital for a while. That's why--that's why I can't stand watching soap operas anymore."

"I know." Chandler nodded. Joey used to care about the plots of soaps, especially when he starred on Days of Our Lives the first time, before being dropped down an elevator shaft. Now the enthusiasm was gone and he never thought farther ahead than one script.

"She was special," Joey said. "She meant something, and I didn't want her to go. I would've gone to art museums and fancy restaurants for her, if she wanted me to. I would've been a stand-up guy and not cheated."

"Sure," Chandler sympathized and believed him. "She was the one who wouldn't commit, or tell her boyfriend what had happened." He still thought of Kate as a snobby, deceitful slut.

Joey on the other hand looked wistful. "I never liked smart girls until Kate. I never thought it could be great just to talk with her and look into her eyes. That night, we stayed up talking about everything, and we totally connected. We were crazy about each other."

Chandler nodded. "Yeah, Monica told me how happy you were that morning. You had, 'the night', you know, when everything clicks. It's like when I stayed up all night chatting with Janice on the internet, you know? It felt great that I could get real with her and be honest, with no jokes. I didn't even care that Monica called me a geek." Chandler laughed at little at the irony of remembering when he had loved Janice. Then he patted Joey's shoulder. "I guess that's why you fell for Rachel with just one night too."

Joey shook his head. "But maybe I wasn't falling for her. Not really. I-I forgot about Kate completely until you reminded me in the room there. That's crazy! And now I feel..."

"Guilty?"

Joey nodded and looked troubled. "Messed up. I mean, maybe I-I was just pretending that Rachel was Kate? On our fake date, Rachel did this move where she asked me where I grew up, and got me talking all about my family and stuff; it was just like with me and Kate. I told her all about my parents and my sisters and my grandmothers, and she told me about her brothers and how one died."

"Wow," Chandler said. "Yeah, I guess that explains it. It did seem a bit weird, you know, you having such deep feelings again, and for Rachel. You've flirted with her, Phoebe, and Monica lots of times, and it never meant anything before."

Joey's heart ached at the memory. "Nobody meant anything to me. Not like that. Not until Kate."

"I'm sorry, Joe." Chandler hugged him close and was afraid he might cry. "I-I thought you were over her. You seemed happy enough, sleeping with all the girls again."

Joey shrugged and sighed despondently. "It was just... getting on with life. Realizing that she wasn't ever gonna come back from L.A. Sometimes I used to think I'd go move to L.A. and see if I could find her. But I kept thinking, maybe she doesn't remember me. We weren't together that long." He choked up. "Then I go and forget her, huh! How could I do that?"

"I-I guess so that the forgetting could be mutual. You'd have to talk to Monica. She's the one who's had psychology classes."

"It's awful! I was lying to myself. I was lying to Rachel. Man, I even told Rachel that I'd never had a romantic storyline on Days before, and that's dumb! The writers had me making out with women right and left, even that chick who turned out to be Drake's half-sister."

Chandler shrugged. "Well, Rachel was right there with us, watching the TV! You'd think she'd remember those episodes, being the soap nut that she is. I don't know, maybe she just wanted a hot romance with a soap opera actor, and was flattered to think that she'd be the first."

"Ugh!" Joey grimaced. "Then this whole thing with Rachel, and Ross, was just a mistake! Just... imaginary. I-I gotta go tell him!"

"Huh?"

"Yeah, I gotta find Ross. He and Rachel belong together. They have a baby; they're a family. If I can't have the girl I love, then somebody should be happy at least. I gotta stop him before he does something with Charlie."

"Charlie?"

"Yeah, after she broke up with me, I saw her kissing him later."

Chandler was shocked. "So everybody's kissing everybody? Is there something in the water?"

Joey grabbed his arm. "Let's go. They might be in me and Charlie's room right now." They hurried away together.

Meanwhile, in Rachel's room, she and Monica were still discussing Kate Miller.

"So he really loved her?" Rachel asked. "It wasn't just a crush or something, like what he had on Ursula or Janine?"

"No it was more than a crush. Didn't you pay attention? If it was just lust, don't you think he would've been satisfied with that one night of sex that they had, then be happy to get rid of her the next morning? Why would he break up with that understudy girl, and be hurt when Kate said it didn't mean anything to her? Why would Joey cry and not give up on trying to impress her, even when we told him it was hopeless? And why would he watch her sleep, then talk all night, instead of just jumping into bed again?"

Rachel saw her point. "I guess I was preoccupied back then. You know, trying to deal with all the jealousy and awkwardness after breaking up with Ross."

"Yeah you were pretty busy," Monica agreed. "But didn't Joey ever mention Kate to you later, like when he first told you he loved you? Not even to convince you that he was serious and had real feelings, not just the sexist flirting around that he does with all of us?"

"No. No, Joey acted like there wasn't anybody else, even when he was talking to me about the Drake/Olivia story on DOOL last month. He said that I was the first and only woman he ever loved. He was so sweet and earnest and vulnerable, like--like Ross on the prom video, when he was going to fill in for Chip."

"Ross?" Monica smiled and found it significant that Rachel brought up that name. "So you're saying you liked Joey because he was like Ross?"

"What?" Rachel gasped and her eyes widened. "No, no! No that's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?" she challenged. "It's a Freudian slip. You only liked Joey as a friend before, but lately you've been all ready to jump him just because he reminded you of Ross."

"Don't put words into my mouth! This is not about Ross! I mean, this whole thing started when Joey had that love scene on his soap, and I had the dream about kissing him."

"I still say it was a dream about Drake," Monica insisted. But then she gasped and considered the incident in a different light. "Unless--! Rach, you told me that scene was Drake trying to prevent Olivia from getting married to somebody. Just like when you tried to crash Ross's wedding to Emily."

"Oh my God!" she gasped.

"Yay!" Monica was quite pleased. "You love my brother again."

"No, I can't! This--this can't be happening!" Rachel started to panic and feel lost, much like before London when Phoebe had pestered her into realizing that she still loved Ross. She was upset with herself for being so blind, and also with Monica for not helping her figure this out before.

"See, psychology classes do come in handy! You were in denial, and transferring--"

"Monica!" Rachel cried and was fed up with her gloating. "Stop it, and help me! What--what am I gonna do now? I-I want him back, but Ross likes that Charlie girl! It's London all over again!"

"Rach," Monica rubbed Rachel's back soothingly. "Look--Charlie, Julie. Do you see any resemblance there?"

Rachel thought about it and asked, "Are you sure? You mean she's just another paleontologist?"

Monica nodded. "Come on, Rach. Ross always loves you, deep down. It's just, when you're out giving your number away and kissing co-workers, he has to find somebody else. I'm sure if you talked to him and let him know how you feel, he'd choose you again. And without a pro/con list this time."

Rachel sniffled and sat up, feeling more encouraged now. "Oh! Oh, I have to see him! I have to--where is he? His room?"

"Why don't you wait here, and clean up a little first?" Monica gave her some tissues and wiped some mascara from her eyes. "I'll go get Ross and send him over to you. And I'll try to make sure he doesn't do that list thing again! He's got a freaking baby with you, and that trumps everything!"

"O-okay. Thank you!" But she got worried again and grabbed hold of Monica. "Wait, wait! Should I explain to Ross about what happened with Joey? Oh, he's going to be upset, just like about that fake proposal at the hospital!"

Monica came back and hugged her reassuringly. "Oh, Rach! You were just confused and emotional and lonely. I mean, I guess I could go tell Chandler and Joey to keep the kiss a secret for you. I think they'd understand, if I explained that you were really thinking about Ross. They want you to be happy."

"You sure they wouldn't feel guilty and tell Ross?"

Monica sighed. "Look, even if somebody accidentally or deliberately tells him later, I'll help you explain things, okay? I'll tell Ross not to overreact and get crazy again; he can't keep driving you away with the jealousy and stuff. I mean, if you can forgive him for the 'we were on the break' thing, he's got to forgive you for a kiss."

Rachel felt better. "Yeah. Yeah, you're right."

"And you do forgive him, don't you?" she asked.

Rachel met her eyes and nodded. "Yeah. It-it was a long time ago, and I've--I've done rotten things too, like slept with Barry while he was engaged to Mindy. Ross was just, just so screwed up by Carol leaving him, and he had so many issues. If he promises to get his paranoia under control, and respect my job more, maybe we can work it all out. We've got to try at least! I still love him."

Monica smiled. "Good! Oh, this is so romantic, Rach! You guys can be together in Barbados, like me and Chandler in London."

"I guess so!" Rachel got excited and thought it must be meant to be. "Oh, what if we get married here, Mon?"

"What! You don't want to turn this into Vegas, do you?"

"No! I mean, at your parents' anniversary in Massapequa, Ross and I pretended that we were married, and the wedding was here, on a cliff in Barbados."

"Wow! That would be great! But you know, we're not in Barbados for that much longer. There'd be no time to have a wedding before we needed to fly home."

"Oh I know. It's too soon for Ross and me, anyway. But maybe we could just get back together now, and maybe next year, we'll come back and get married."

"Oh, that's so great!" They hugged again, then Monica went off to find Ross.