Although I've been chided for my negative remarks in regard to Disney, I will not apologize for my childish name-calling. I will concede, however, that Disney provides a plethora of recognizable songs that are just dying for a phantomish twist!

Thank you for your positive reviews, I swear they were all three times as funny as my songfic, y'all are great! MagickAlianne, thanks for the advice about doing one from Carlotta's point of view, but cough Disney has poisoned your mind cough mumble mumble...

I don't know if I'll be doing any other songfics for a while, so enjoy this one!

I Won't Say I'm Washed Up (Carlotta's POV, from Hercules "I won't say I'm in Love")

Carlotta:

I know I'm beautiful and talented

I guess we've already covered that

But no contract's worth the aggravation

I've walked out before, we've been there, done that!

Backstage Voices:

Who'd'ya think you're kiddin'

Her voice's the Earth and heaven

Try to keep it hidden

Honey, they can see right through you

Girl, ya know you can't deny it

We know that you're done for and

Who their prima donna is…

Carlotta:

No chance, no way

I won't say it, no, no

Backstage Voices:

You're shrill, you're bad

why deny it, uh-oh

Carlotta:

It's not too late

I won't say I'm washed up

I thought the death threats were just miss-addressed

Who would dare ever hate me?

But my brain is tellin me to steer clear,

Unless you wanna to get crushed under, a flat!

Oh

Backstage Voices:

You cow, you keep on lying

You'll never match his protege

Baby, we're not buying

we saw ya hit the parfaits

Face it like a grown-up

When ya gonna own up?

All you are is really bad!

Carlotta:

No chance, no way

I won't say it, no, no

Backstage Voices:

Feel the fear, he's here

Check the mirror you're washed up

Carlotta:

It's not like I'm from the Ballet,

I won't say I'm washed up

Backstage Voices:

Your voice, it skips, read our lips

You're washed up!

Carlotta:

My fans lave me,

I won't say it

Just wait, you'll see

I won't say it!

Backstage Voices:

Girl, don't be proud

Just face it, you're washed up

Carlotta:

Oh

At least out loud,

I won't say I'mCroak!