Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or Desperate House Wives.
"Kids, I was thinking of throwing a dinner party, in Mary Alice's, I mean in Padme's honor of course." Leia stared at him in disbelief.
"Coolieo." Luke acknowledged his father.
"Luke, don't ever say that again, or I might just have to hurt you." Leia warned him, and then turned to her dad. "Can we unfreeze Han so he can join us?"
"Sure, sweetie pie."
The party had started and all was going well. Leia was busy greeting the guests waiting for Han to arrive, and Luke, well Luke was screwing up the simple task of taking people's coats.
"But I can't tell the difference between Obi-wan's Jedi robe and Yoda's Jedi rode," Luke complained as he debated on which cubby to put them in.
Vader smacked himself in the head at the thought of his moronic son. "Yoda's shorter." Luke examined the robes again and blushed when he realized the obvious difference.
"Luke do you think I should wear my mask to the party or no? I don't want to scare anyone, but I do think it gives me a powerful presence."
"Daddy if you wear it you'll be weird and all the other kids on the playground will make fun of you." Luke broke out into tears.
"Uhh, okay I won't wear it then." Anakin backed away from his wailing son.
Ding. Anakin had a glass raised in the air a prepared to give a speech. "It has been nearly twenty years since we last saw Padme. I think I've been hiding the truth long enough; she never actually died. Yes, after Luke and Leia were being taken care of I abducted Padme and brought her to the Death Star. One night we were having a nice conversation when she needed to get a glass of water, she has been wandering the halls of this space station ever since, lost."
"It is a really big space station." Mace agreed. Yes, he's alive, my story remember?
"Mesa agree with purple saber girly man."
"Jar Jar!" Obi-wan pointed to his old 'friend'. "You're not dead yet?"
"No, no, no. Mesa and de Gungans live forsa thousands of years."
"Noooooooo!" Obi-wan screamed at the tragedy. "Lord, help me." He got down on his knees and started begging to the sky.
Anakin was glad he agreed with his former master about something, ever since he had met Jar Jar he wanted to kill him. "Well, since I'm the only Lord here," Vader begun, and then finished by force chocking Jar Jar. The room went into cheers. It was truly a party now.
Luke sat down at the table next to Yoda and his father. Leia sat next to Han, and continued to tell him how he was a scoundrel and that she only dates respectable men, while continuously flirting with her eyes and smile.
"Yoda, didn't you just like die?"- Luke.
"No, just trying to get rid of you, I was."-Yoda.
Authors Note: Thanks for the comments. I just hope this story gave a few laughs. Next chapter, Jar Jar's funeral.