Again, thank you for the feedback - but I'm afraid the lighter mood won't last... : )
All previous disclaimers apply...
Missing
ix
The small reception hall was packed with several hundred guests, most of whom hovered around the newly wed couple. Conversation was loud, punctuated with the clinking of glasses. Music blared from the sound system, droids hung around various groups, offering drinks and party fares. Someone laughed boisterously.
From a quiet corner of the hall, Han viewed the celebrations with contempt. He refilled his glass with the last dregs from the bottle he was holding, and downed the fiery liquid in one mouthful. He exhaled heavily and reached for a new bottle. He watched Princess Leia float through the crowd to greet Wedge and Kandi. Han laughed humourlessly to himself; Wedge had been grinning so much that evening, it was a wonder his mouth didn't freeze up. Han popped the top off the bottle and filled his glass with a healthy measure, ignoring a growled warning from his partner.
Chewbacca carefully watched his friend. He would allow him one more glass before taking control of him. That was their agreement: Neither would let the other get so intoxicated that they couldn't shoot straight, and Han was fast approaching that state. The large Wookiee knew Han was drowning his sorrows for several reasons, the first being that he hated functions like this, and the second...
Well, the second was apparent to all, except Han himself. He missed the Skywalker cub. Chewbacca missed him, too, and his absence stood out at this gathering. Luke had agreed to stand by Antilles as he took his vows, to help organize the celebration afterward. His place had been taken by theCorellian, who now regretted his decision as it meant he had to stay until the end of the reception and deliver the closing speech, and Han would rather be elsewhere.
Han reached for the bottle again, conscious of the Wookiee's gaze. He remembered their agreement, too; but right now he didn't give a damn. He was going to enjoy getting drunk; it would make up for being bored out of his skull. He groaned as Wedge spotted him through a break in the crowd. The pilot gave a wide grin and pulled his bride towards the spacer. Han looked around for somewhere to retreat to, but they reached him before he could make good his escape.
"Captain Solo!" Wedge had to shout above the din of the gathering. "We'd like to thank you again for taking Luke's place. We realize it must be hard for you."
"Why should it be hard?" Han's indifference wiped the smile from Wedge's face. Kandi shot an uneasy glance toward her new husband; the air around them thickened. Solo was drunk, and in no mood for niceties.
"Why does everyone think it's hard to me to take the kid's place? Why is it if someone mentions Luke, they look at me? Should it bother me that he got himself killed?" Chewie placed a hairy paw on Han's arm, trying to calm him. The room had grown quiet. The Corellian shrugged off his partner's concern.
"He was your friend," Wedge said, not understanding Solo's outburst.
"So? What am I supposed to do? Walk around in black, wailing in mourning?" Solo belched. "He was your friend, too—but I don't see you grieving too much. You've been too busy wearing that stupid grin .."
"Han!" Leia quickly interrupted him, "That's enough!"
Han turned on her. "Anything you say, Your Highness." He grabbed the bottle and stormed through the stunned crowd. Leia and Wedge ran after him.
"Han!" Leia called after him as they entered the hallway. "Wait!"
He stopped in his tracks, and whirled on them. "What?"
"You can't leave," Wedge protested. His great day had just collapsed around him. "You agreed…"
"I just resigned." Han walked on toward the hangar.
Leia turned to the stricken pilot. "You go back, Wedge; I'll try and talk to him."
"But, he's to close the proceedings."
"Ask Chewbacca; he'll be only too glad to do it." Leia followed the pirate's path.
Wedge watched her go. "Chewbacca can't deliver a speech," he quietly told her retreating back.
Leia reached the hangar's door just in time to see the Falcon lift off and soar out of Ahana's atmosphere. She leaned against the wall and sighed heavily; she should have known something like this would happen. She doubted Wedge would be able to fully forgive the Corellian for upsetting his wedding. Perhaps it would be best for Han if he were to leave them. Feeling troubled, she returned to the hall.
ooOOoo
Han settled the Falcon into a gentle orbit and placed his beloved ship on auto. He flicked the last switch and slouched back into his chair. All was quiet here, all was peaceful, and soon his anger began to fade. He had no idea why he was angry. Was it with Wedge, with Leia, or with himself? He shook his head and lifted the bottle to his lips; he swallowed and licked his lips as he mused over his feelings, feelings he didn't like or really understand.
No, he wasn't angry with Wedge, or Leia. A bit annoyed with them, yes. They were trying to be sympathetic, and Solo hated that. He was angry with himself; but only because he'd shot off his mouth in front of all those people. He frowned as the truth tried to push forward from the back of his mind. He drank more from the bottle in an attempt to keep the thoughts at bay. He failed, and they rushed in, filling his mind.
He'd done the one thing he'd vowed he'd never do: he'd gotten involved. He'd allowed himself to let down his shield, and now he was paying for it. He missed the kid, it was as simple as that. Despite his words to the contrary, that was the trouble. But he also knew the moment he was sober again, he would deny everything. However, for now, he dwelt on the truth.
Everything had happened to Luke so fast that he hadn't had time to think about the more unpleasant parts of his adventure. Once things had calmed down a bit, Han had found him sitting alone in a tree. Luke had said he'd never climbed one before, and he wanted to see if he could. Han had laughed, asking if he thought he'd be able to get back down; but Luke had only managed a slight smile. It was then that Han had noticed the boy had been crying. Tears were foreign to Han, and he had been unsure how to react to Luke's. He had helped him down, trying to crack jokes; but Luke had not been in a joking mood. His grief had finally caught up to him. Han had listened as Luke told him about his aunt and uncle, about how he'd been an orphan and how they had raised him from a baby. And how they were slaughtered by Vader's Stormtroopers.
On the outside, Han had never changed; but inside, his heart had altered, shifted. He had been moved by Luke's story. They had something in common; they were both parentless. Neither had felt the love of a mother and father. Han had slapped Luke on the back, attempting to cheer him up. Feeling like an older brother, he had asked Luke if he'd like to join him on a supply run to Xalan; maybe Miss High and Mighty would come along, too. Luke had grinned, the excitement clear in his eyes.
Han finished his drink and placed the empty bottle on the cockpit floor. His gaze turned to Chewie's co-pilot chair and console. Yes, he missed Luke -Luke, with his smart mouth,his dumb suggestions, his overwhelming enthusiasm for everything in life...
'No, no no!" Solo slapped Luke's inquisitive hand away from the controls. "Not yet; wait until I show you first."
Luke grinned widely. "You said that the other night--in the mess."
Han grimaced as he flicked a switch above Luke's head; that night had been embarrassing. They had spotted what must have been the best-looking female in the Alliance. Han had then proceeded to teach Luke his best chat-up lines. Han had struck out miserably—and Luke had walked away with her. The grin the kid had worn the next day had been infuriating! "Shut up." He hated to be reminded of his failures. "Who's the expert? Me or you?"
Luke chuckled gleefully. "You said that, too!"
"Listen, Junior—if you want to learn to fly this bird, keep that mouth of yours shut and pay attention. Show some respect."
"Yes sir!"
"That's better." Han patted Luke on the head. He climbed into his own chair and began pointing out switches and dials to his young friend. He had surprised himself, not to mention Luke and everyone else, by offering to teach Luke how to fly the Falcon. "That, that and that start her up—don't touch!'1 He indicated a small screen. "That's the scanner…."
"I know that," Luke said. "Do you think I'm stupid?" Solo flashed him a knowing grin. Luke groaned, regretting the rhetorical question.
The Corellian continued with his lesson. "Switch on running lights," he told his pupil. Luke's hand hovered, uncertain, over a button. Han cleared his throat loudly, attracting Luke's attention, and shook his head. Luke's hand moved to another switch; Solo nodded, and the lights were activated. "Good; now, the console on your left; activate auto systems check." He watched Luke carefully. "Right; acknowledge it." He tapped his finger on an indicator. "Now, this is your power-train monitor. If you get a green light, you're in great shape." The light blinked on cue. "That's all systems A-okay. We can prepare to take off. Set your power flow for ten--no, not that one--that one; and apply some throttle. Clear your lifters, change power flow to drive, and give it more throttle." He grinned. "There, now you're air-borne."
"No, we're not," Luke protested. "We didn't budge at all."
Han's smile widened. "You didn't think I was going to let you fly her on your first lesson, did you? Maybe next time, if you're lucky…"
"But Han? I…."
Chuckling Solo rose from his chair and sauntered from the cockpit; now he'd gotten Luke back for that little incident in the mess!
Han turned away from the co-pilot's area and heaved himself from his chair. He staggered through to the passenger compartment and threw himself onto the recliner next to the game board. There he fell into an uneasy, drunken slumber.
ooOOoo
Rieekan rose to greet the Princess Leia as she entered the room, breaking off his conversation with Commander Narra. She was startled by his appearance, the heavy shadows beneath his eyes being the only colour on his pale face. "Your Highness." His voice sounded tired. "I'm afraid I have some grave news. We've lost liam's squad."
Leia's eyes widened in horror. "The whole squad?"
"Every man, every fighter."
"But that area was supposed to be quiet!" She lowered herself into a nearby chair.
"So was Irlam, if you remember." Rieekan quickly regretted mentioning the system where the princess had lost her friend; he glanced at her, watched her features darken. "This, of course, puts the Minoan assault in jeopardy," he continued. "We've lost too many good pilots and too much equipment in recent missions to continue with the preparations for the attack. We may to call it off."
"No, General." Leia shook her! head, disagreeing. "We've spent too much time planning and exercising for this attack. It's the only chance we'll have of getting a shot at Governor Amand, and at least bring a halt to the weapons production there and it would be a severe blow to the Empire. We have to go ahead with the attack; with Amand out of the way, we then have a chance to bring his region into the Alliance. To pull out means we lose too much."
"Your Highness," the general protested. He saw her view of the argument, but they lacked sufficient numbers for the attack. "The attack is no longer feasible for us at this time. Perhaps if we postpone until——"
"We'll miss Amand. He'll only be there that one day."
Narra listened to their debate, weighing up each side of the argument. He cleared his throat before speaking. "May I make a suggestion?"
Leia looked toward him, as though just noticing his presence. Narra addressed them both. "I agree with Her Highness; but I also agree with you, General. Ahana no longer has the resources for the assault; but if we were to make the operation a joint effort between bases, say Ahana and Raymar, then we'd have the necessary numbers. The manoeuvres have been going well, sir; the men are almost ready. They'll be disappointed if the attack is called off now."
A sparkle showed in Leia's eyes for the first time during the meeting. "It is possible," she said, trying to hide her enthusiasm. "I'm sure General Dodonna will agree."
"It means releasing one another's location," Rieekan thought out loud, "so that collaboration is possible; but it's a small risk, one that I think we can afford." He smiled. "I think we're all in agreement, then. I'll get in touch with Dodonna on Raymar at once; the sooner we…
The conference room's door swept open, cutting Rieekan off in mid-sentence, and a very angry Wookiee entered. He charged straight to Leia as he barked and howled his grievances, emphasizing his point with wide arm gestures. Leia, taken aback by Chewbacca's outburst, could only gape at the awesome sight before her.
"Chewbacca, I don't—" she began, as the door opened once more. Threepio bustled in, followed closely by his smaller counterpart.
"Princess Leia! Princess Leia!" The golden droid skirted around the Wookiee, carefully avoiding his flailing arms. "I told Chewbacca he couldn't come in here; but as you know, a Wookiee's manners—"
"Thank you, Threepio." Leia didn't let him continue; Chewbacca was angry enough. "Chewie, calm down, please." She turned to the two men and gave an almost embarrassed smile. "Gentlemen, if you'll accept my apologies." She strode from the room followed by the Wookiee and the two droids.
Once in the corridor, she attempted to sort things out. "Chewie, tell me what's wrong." She didn't really have to ask. The sensors had been monitoring the Falcon's orbit around the planet since her captain had placed her there the night before. It was now mid-afternoon, and still Han had given no sign of coming back down.
The large Wookiee spoke slowly, allowing Threepio time to translate for Leia.
"He says that since Captain Solo left the ceremony last night, there's been no sign of him. Chewbacca is worried that the captain has left the base without him, and he's..." The droid trailed off and stared in shock at the Wookiee. "I'm not saying that!"
Leia smiled in amusement as Chewbacca growled threateningly.
Threepio glanced around him, making sure there was no one nearby to hear the Wookiee's obscenity. He lowered his voice and leaned toward Leia, hoping he wouldn't offend her. He whispered in her ear, as Artoo Detootittered.
"It's okay, Chewie." She jerked a thumb skyward. "Han's in orbit. I'm sure once he's worked off his hangover, he'll be right down. As for your own…" she paused debating whether or not to use Chewbacca's own words. She decided not to; Threepios processors might short-circuit. "…headache, you can get something from the medical centre. I understand they've had quite a few of the wedding guests."
The Wookiee barked a question and Threepio relayed it to the princess.
She nodded. "Yes I'm sure communications will allow you to contact Han. Now, if you'll excuse me, the general will be waiting." She returned to the conference room as Chewbacca trudged down the corridor to the Command Centre.
Threepio watched him go. He turned and looked at the closed door, then glanced down the corridor. What were his next orders? He turned back to Chewbacca's receding Perhaps he'd better watch him; sure the Wookiee didn't cause trouble. He tapped his friend's head. "Come along, Artoo."
ooOOoo
Wedge Antilles hesitated at the foot of the Millennium Falcon's ramp. He had been puting this off ever since the Falcon had returned several hours ago and he didn't think he could let it wait any longer. He wasn't even sure he was doing the right thing; perhaps he'd only make matters worse by trying to apologize to the Corellian, but he wanted to clear the air between them. After all, they couldn't avoid one another forever. He glanced toward the fighters at the other end of the large hangar, knowing he should get his butt over there. The commander would give him hell if he was late for the latest manoeuvre, and he had a squad to lead in the attack now.
Wedge felt a tremor ripple down his spine. A squad of his own! Married one day and given a command the next! He sighed; there was no time for a honeymoon in the Alliance. Kandi was needed med-centre and he was needed in his fighter. Only, did it have to be Luke's squad they gave? Did it have to be Luke's Minoan target he had to hit?
"Hey, Lieutenant!"
Wedge didn't respond to that shout.
"Hey, Wedge!"
Wedge turned to find his wingman behind him. "What?"
"You coming? Or are you planning to stay here all evening?"
Wedge laughed. "I'll be with you in a minute, Jansen. I've got something I have to do first."
Jansen glanced at the freighter. "You'd better only be a minute; Narra's been kind of touchy lately. If you're late for—"
"I know. I have to do this while I'm in the right frame of mind. I just hope I don't make things worse." He gestured at the waiting fighters. "You'd better go; Narra would really get hot if we both were late."
Jansen ran on as Wedge started up the ramp. The ship was quiet. It would just be his luck if Solo wasn't there after all. There was no sign of the Corellian in either of the passenger compartments or in the cockpit, although they both were strewn with tools. Wedge knew he had to go; his minute was up long ago.
A spanner landed at his feet. Startled, he looked up to find Solo staring down at him from a hole in the ceiling. The pirate climbed down and picked up the fallen tool. Ignoring the young pilot, he strode through to the cockpit. Wedge was uncertain how to react to Solo's hostility, but he couldn't back out now. He followed Han to the flight deck.
"Captain," he began, unsure how to phrase what he wanted to say, "I'd like to apologize…for last night."
No reaction.
"I shouldn't have said anything about..." He stumbled on, his ill-prepared speech faltering, watching Han's impassive back. "I was only trying to thank you for stepping in at the last moment. I had no idea you felt that way…"
Han was glad his face was hidden from Antilles. He wouldn't have like the pilot to see the confusion or surprise he was feeling. Why was Wedge apologizing to him? It should be the other way around. He didn't know what to answer; he wasn't used to these kinds of situations. Why were things so difficult these days? Even Chewie was acting strange. Instead of complaining and sulking for an hour, when he returned with the Falcon the Wookiee had handed him some medication for a headache and told him to rest for a while. Perhaps the bawling out was for later?
"...I think we both were to blame for what happened," Wedge continued. "And I hope you'll accept my apologies."
Han turned to face the Rebel, trying to get his tongue to speak the strange words. "If you'll accept mine. "
Wedge stared at him in surprise, a grin beginning to grow on his face. He nodded, pleased. "Of course I will; I--"
"Good." Han turned back to his repairs.
Antilles watched him struggle with an unyielding screw. "You getting ready to leave?"
"Why?" asked Han, grimacing as the muscles in his hand cramped. He shook it, trying to loosen it up. "Are you in a hurry to be rid of me?"
Wedge laughed. "No, but Princess Leia said you were going after the ceremony."
"Well, it just shows that Her Highness doesn't know everything. He tried the screw once more. "We can't leave until we've got this bucket repaired."
"Problems?"
"Navigation's been showing some drift again. It'll take some time to fix, so I guess I'll be around for a while yet." He looked up and grinned. "You can tell her for me if you want; save me the trouble. He looked thoughtful for a moment "'S funny how she always seems to get her way.
"Antilles!" a voice shouted from the open hatch.
Wedge's face fell. "Oh shit—the manoeuvre! The Commander will kill me!" He ran in panic from the cockpit, only to immediately reappear. "Try turning the screw the other way." And he was gone.
Han looked at the screwdriver in his hand. "The other way?" He tried Antilles's suggestion. The offending screw turned easily. "Well, I'll be damned!"
ooOOoo
Leia smiled to herself as she watched Lieutenant Antilles race from the Falcon towards his furious Commander. Narra's voice floated above the din of the fighters' engines.
"Glad you could make it, Antilles. Is it common for married men to be late; or didn't the little woman let you out without changing your underwear?" He didn't give Wedge time to answer. "To your fighter—and count yourself lucky that I'm not taking this any further!"
Wedge ran to his ship and climbed aboard. Nara glanced over to the princess. He grinned and winked. Leia knew he'd give the pilot hell during the exercise, criticize every move he made, countermand every order he gave. She also knew he was planning on inviting Wedge for a drink afterward, to celebrate his promotion.
Leia walked toward the Falcon's ramp as the fighters lifted off, and she wondered how many of the pilots were leaving to practice their deaths. She shuddered at the thought, and dismissed it as she entered the freighter.
She found Han where Wedge had left him, on his knees in front of the controls, trying to remove a panel to gain access to the workings underneath. He was having difficulty with the final screw.
"Why is it always the first and the last?" he muttered to himself, not realizing Leia was behind him.
He turned it one way and cursed. He turned it the other way and cursed. He pounded on the panel and turned the screw again. He gave a small cry of triumph as it loosened and the panel lifted off.
"Working hard?" she asked his back.
He looked around at her. "If I could get peace, I would be." He swapped tools and peered into the open console.
"I saw Wedge leave."
"You've got good eye-sight."
She smiled at his sarcasm. "Have you two made up?"
"Yeah, everything's all buddy-buddy." He handed a spanner to her. "Here, hold this." He reached into the hole. "Did he get it from Narra?"
"Probably still getting it!" She watched him work for a while, trying to pluck up her courage, to ask him what she'd come to ask. "You leaving?"
"Nope."
"What made you change your mind?"
"Sick ship."
That always was his answer. She sat on the navigator's chair. "So, you're here for a while yet?"
"Looks like it." He glanced up at her. "You're sitting in my light."
"Sorry." She shifted over to Chewbacca's co-pilot chair.
He turned back to his repairs, taking the spanner from her hand. "How's the exercises goin'?"
He'd hit the nail on the head. "That's partly the reason I'm here."
Her words were enough to make him put down the tools. He stood up and stretched before settling into the chair behind him. "Okay, run it by me."
"Well, as you know, we've been short of pilots and fighters due to one reason or another; so we've been forced to bring in another Alliance outpost for the assault. Dodonna, on Raymar, has agreed that crippling Minoan and killing Amand on his visit there would further the Rebellion's cause, and so he's sending us some men and machines--"
"Wait a minute," he cut her off. "I thought the other bases were to remain unknown to lower ranks and non-Alliance members. Why are you telling me all this?"
"Well, since Raymar is sending men, it would be hard for us to keep them from saying where they came from," she explained to him. "But everything else is still classified. Only the men involved with the attack know the date and the targets, so I'm not telling you anything secret."
"So what's this got to do with me?" Han flicked a switch on the console and frowned when there was no response. It must be worse than he thought.
"Dodonna's also sending us the medical supplies we asked for, and--"
" — And you want me to go and pick them up," Han finished for her.
She smiled and nodded. "Right first time."
"I've got this sick ship, remember?"
"Use one of ours."
"Those old cargo barges?" Han scoffed, and reached for his tools once more. "They wouldn't even make it out of this system, let alone travel to another."
"They're perfectly all right. They've done us okay."
Han paused in his work and stared at her, the businessman's gleam in his eye. "How much?"
"Same as the other times; but Raymar has a good supply, and you need parts for the Falcon, so we could throw in what you need."
He pursed his lips as he mused over the proposition. Free parts were a good offer. "I'll have to see Chewie."
"He's already agreed," Leia laughed.
"I guess I've got no choice then — okay, I'll go."
"Thanks, Han." She bent down and lightly kissed his forehead.
Han stared after her as she left the cockpit. A slow grin appeared on his face and he turned to continue his work.
ooOOoo
"General," Leia said into the intercom on her console, "Captain Solo has agreed to bring our supplies; but the Falcon isn't space-worthy, so he'll be borrowing one of our cargo barges."
Rieekan's voice filtered through. "Very well, Your Highness, I'll have one prepared for him and Chewbacca. You are retiring now?"
"Yes; unless there's something...?"
"I'll wake you if you're needed; sleep well."
"Thank you, General." She flicked off the intercom and sat back on her bunk. She yawned as she pulled her hair down and untied the braids. She shook her head, loosening the strands, allowing her hair to tumble over her shoulders. As she reached for her comb, she knocked something off the dresser. It landed hard on the floor with a sharp crack.
Uttering a short curse, she picked up the stricken holo from the floor. The image caught her eye and she stared at the figure who grinned at her from the thick plastic.
Guilt filled her heart as Luke reminded her he was no longer there. So many things had been on her mind lately, she had begun to push him to the back of her mind, begun to lock him in the same closet as Alderaan. There, he couldn't cause pain; there, he wouldn't get in her way; there, he would stay until quiet moments like this. She moved to place the holocube back on the dresser; but she hesitated as she realized with horror that she had accidentally pushed the small button at the back of the picture.
The small figure in her hand moved and an embarrassed laugh giggled from the tiny speaker.
"I can't say that now!" Mock horror spread over Luke's face. He looked to the side, listening tosomeone speak. Leia knew it had been her, trying to persuade Luke to say what she wanted.
"Are you sure that's what you want?" he asked, not knowing Han was recording every word and gesture he made. He shrugged and turned to face the holo-recorder. He became serious and raised his blaster. "I'm Luke Skywalker—I'm here to rescue you!" He paused like that for several seconds before turning to the side again. "That was awful!" he grumbled, and started laughing once more.
The recording stopped, and the figure returned to his previous position. Leia set the plastic holo back in its place next to Han's.
"Oh, Luke!" she sighed heavily, tears slowly forming at the edge of her eyes. "I miss you…"