Author's Note: If you thought the randomness was gone, you thought wrong, it's back with a vengence. The randomness has struck again...see what I mean.

Disclaimer:Nothing fromTroy belongs to me.

Scene change to Agamemnon's tent, which is smaller than Achilles, so he's looking to wreak vengence upon the warrior.

Agamemnon accepts gifts from other kings.

Achilles yawns loudly.

Agamemnon: Leaves (rather more excitedly than necessary).

Achilles: Apparently you won some great victory

Agamemnon (suggestively): I still have more to conquer.

Achilles doesn't look up.

Achilles: That's for sure. You can have the beach. I didn't come her for sand, I don't like it, it gets under your nails and the tide always washes your sandcastles away...

Agamemnon clears his throat.

Achilles looks up embarassed.

Agamemnon: No, you want your name to be remembered. But it's my victory not yours.

Achilles: The soldiers won the battle. No you.

Agamemnon: Yeah well...I'm a King! Ha, I'll graffiti my name anywhere and everywhere and no one could care less.

Achilles: You have to win first.

Agamemnon: You sacked the temple of Apollo today.

Achilles (sighs) Here we go again. Don't tell me Apollo is going to strike me down, you have no idea how many people I have already had this conversation with.

Agamemnon: No I want the spoils of war.

Achilles: Oh ok, take then.

Agememnon: I already have. (whistles loudly)

Large dog comes in and jumps all over Achilles, who stabs it. Everyone glares at dog, who leaves tent with it's tail between it's legs.

Agamemnon whistles differently.

Aphareus and Haemon drag Briseis into the tent.

Agamemnon: Tonight I'll have her give me a bath...And then, who knows?

Achilles: Oh I have a pretty good idea. I have no quarrel with you brothers, but if you don't let her go, you will never see home again.

Aphareus (whispers to Haemon) Dish it up anyway, it still means we're going to die.

Briseis: STOP! Many people have died today.

Haemon: Oh, no shit.

Briseis glares at him.

Briseis: I don't want anyone dying for me. Put it away (to Achilles).

Achilles misunderstands Briseis

Achilles: I'd rather leave it out.

Briseis raises an eyebrow.

Achilles: Oh, the sword.

Agamemnon: OOOHHH, mighty Achilles taking orders from a slave girl.

Achilles: She's not a slave girl.

Agamemnon: Well 1. She's a slave now. And 2. If I were you I'd wanna be hoping she was a girl. You're obviously crushing on her.

Achilles: You sick son of a bitch. Before my time is done King of Kings, I will look down upon your corpse and smile.

Achilles storms out.