"The Forward"

Inspired by Fresh-AngelBabe's MagicMail

To: Hoggy-Warty Hogwarts (Group)

From:

Fill this out and send it on.

Name: Remus J. Lupin

Age: Far too old for something like this.

House: Gryffindor.

Been Kissed: That is a rather personal question!
Been on stage: No, that was always James and Sirius. Good times…..
Gotten in a car accident?: I do my best to avoid automobiles. With my luck, I'd end up in one with a moon roof.
Cold or hot: Well, both! One cannot always be hot or always be cold.
Blue or Red: Red, like Tonks when…ahem.
Rain or snow: Neither. Really, what sort of questionnaire is this?
Wool or cotton? Either, as long as it fits and is not ripped.

Chocolate milk or plain milk: Plain. Who is this "James Milton" whose answers I am replacing, anyway?

Spring or fall?: Fall? Well, I do agree with this "James" on one count, I suppose…
Do you like someone?: I'm seeing someone casually.
Do They Know: I didn't tell her with words, but I'm pretty sure she got the message.

Who's the funniest: Hagrid. You never quite know what the lovable man will say next.
Who's the craziest: Snape. He's a real party animal (snort)
Who do you e-mail the most: Dumbledore. We do need to keep in touch now. After him, Nymphadora, although she prefers it when I call her- er, nevermind.
Who's the loudest: Fred and George, without a doubt.
Who's the most silent?: Ask Nymphadora. She knows more than I do in regards to that.
Who's the shyest?: Well, I'm guessing that this "James" person is, considering the fact that I've never met him!
Whose parents do you know the best: He knows Arthur and Molly as well? I'll get Molly to have us all over for tea.
Been hugged: I'm more of a doggie- oh, that's not what you're asking, is it?

Had a serious talk?: These questions are quite ludicrous.
Gotten along with your parents: I take my earlier response back; THIS is the most invasive question.
Fought with a friend?: Of course.
Give hugs?: I'm not quite sure what you're asking, so I won't answer.
Give back rubs?: I'm told that I give quite a good rub, actually.
Take walks in the rain?: I'm always ill. I can't.

Which one of your friends...
Knows you the best: Nymphadora. She most definitely knows me better than anyone.
Have you known the longest: Now I know this "James" is a fraud. Older than Dumbledore? It's preposterous!
Have you known the shortest?: He claims to know Nymphadora? I'll teach him to call her a cheeky chit….
Most likely to end up in jail: I agree. Dung.

Been to a concert: No, I dislike the noise.

Favorite Artist: Barry White. Nymphadora rather likes him.

Favorite Song: Elvis, Love Me Tender.

For Muggle-borns and Muggle-raised- Favorite Movie: I find that I rather dislike the cinema ever since viewing "An American Werewolf in London." Didn't do it for me, I'm afraid.

Loved someone so much it made you cry: My, this questionnaire is invasive!
Cheated on a test: Of course not!
Done something illegal: No!
Ever stalked someone: My goodness!
Are You Single: I'll get back to you on that.
Have u ever had a boy/girl friend: Yes, once.
Have you ever pranked someone before?: Yes. They call me Moony for a reason.
Do you swear too much: I try to avoid it. Nymphadora rather brings it out in me, I'm afraid.
Where are you at?: Nymphadora's flat. She's in the other room.
Are you sitting by anyone?: Nothing breathing, but a few inanimate objects.
What color pants are you wearing?: Well…
What song are you listening to right now?: Something by Barry White, I've rather lost track of where the disk is.
What is the last thing that you said?: I'd rather not disclose that.
What's on your mousepad: I don't think I should share.
What was the last thing you ate?: I don't think I should share that, either.
If you were a crayon: Gray. Perfectly me.

Name a Person of the Opposite sex: Severus.

Favorite Color: Purple, like Nymphadora's favorite hair…
How's the weather right now?: The curtains are drawn.
What's under your bed: It's Nymphadora's bed, and I'd really rather not know.
Do you keep your room clean?: Of course.

What do you feel like doing right now: The "Dark Tosser"? Where did that come from?

Who is most likely to fill this out: Fred or George.

Who is least likely to fill this out: A member of the Dark Lord's inner circle, although they may actually be that stupid.

What do you want to do before you get back to school: Something I fear would be edited from this email.