Author's Note: Here we go again, chapter three, and in fairly short order.
I'm happy to say this is starting to gain momentum. For those of you still
with me, thanks for staying and reading. I really appreciate it. Anyways,
This looks like its going to be an interesting chapter as the kids try to
find a place to live while incognito, and well, NERV gets shaft.
Disclaimer: All characters, everything, including my soul, are the express property of Gainax Co. and the respective copyright holders of Shinseki Evangelion (Neon Genesis Evangelion), and so are the ramen noodles I stole from them yesterday!
Chapter Three: New Lies, Old Secrets
Katsuragi - Langley Residence
Higashi District, Tokyo-3
The door to the apartment in the outskirts of the fortress city of Tokyo-3 slid aside easily at the command of its owner. That owner, bedraggled and disheveled, stumbled inside, unable to go much further. In one hand was a briefcase, in the other a six pack of Yebisu beer, draft. The person's clothes looked slept in and her face worn out. It had been a long day, and she felt only half as good as she looked.
Captain Katsuragi Misato of NERV made her way silently into her apartment, tossing her papers and briefcase on the dining table, passing the living room completely, and closing the door to her room behind her. With little fanfare she sagged onto her futon and cracked open a beer. She felt like taking a dive before going to sleep, at least for the stress-reliving value of alcohol as much as for thirst.
Working without two of her pilots had been a risk, however a calculated one. Not only was there little time since the last Angel attack, but there was still one highly trained pilot on-base. This would ensure that there was at least some time to collect Shinji and Rei should hell break loose in the city. Still, she was a bit nervous about the entire affair. It did, in fact, translate to much more administrative juggling on her part. Not only did synch tests need to be moved around, but also they had to continually run drills with Asuka and the command staff to keep everyone in peak performance while shorthanded.
When she could take no more of this 'awake' business, Misato did nothing. Rather, gravity helped her unceremoniously into bed as she fell backwards onto the still unmade futon and its pillow. She hadn't even bothered to throw away her empty cans.
Seemingly far too soon after she gained the black whispering abyss of sleep, she was jostled awake by the shrill sound of the phone ringing. Groggily, with an unsteady hand, she reached for the receiver, and picked up, her head still under the covers.
"Moshi moshi, Katsuragi desu." Greeted Misato in a slurring voice. She listened to the speaker on the other end for twenty seconds.
"NANI?! MASAKA!" [What? Impossible!] she yelled into the receiver, probably exploding the other person's eardrum. Well eardrums aside, he replied and demanded her presence at NERV immediately.
"Hai..so.so ka..Wakarimashita." [Yes, uh huh, I see, Understood.] she hung up, practically slamming the phone as she rolled over and stared, or rather, glared at the ceiling. Something had gone terribly, inexplicably wrong, and possibly the worst thing in the world just happened.
The children were dead.
Central Dogma NERV Headquarters, Tokyo-3 Geofront
Misato strode onto the command level of the Operations Command and Control Center, her face a mess but her eyes hard and red. Her hair was still a bird's nest of strands going in every which direction. As she passed the security checkpoint, NERV Section 2 officers snapped to immediate attention.
In the control center, sub-commander Fuyutsuki and commander Ikari were already waiting. The older man, Fuyutsuki, somewhere in his sixties, long having gone gray, looked very grim. Ikari, however, always looked grim, so Misato could not get much of a read of him. It wasn't like that wasn't normal to begin with. Also roused from bed was Dr. Akagi and First Lieutenant Ibuki. Both women were silent and solemn, however Ritsuko appeared quite indifferent, while Maya herself was obviously upset but trying to follow her mentor's lead.
"Sir." Misato stopped crisply in front of the commander and his majordomo. Ikari nodded almost imperceptibly. The stare he was giving her, she could tell, was his 'angry' stare, the telltale sine was that his hands were clasped behind his back, and he stood with even more imposition and was practically radiating malice in sickening waves. Misato found that she had to take a steadying breath before she could continue.
"I was informed, though without any details. What..what happened, sir?" she asked in a tremor that was weaker than she'd intented.
Gendou hesitated several seconds, drawing out the silence no doubt for shock effect, only after the air was stale did he finish waiting to make his address to his subordinate.
"Pilots Ayanami and Ikari were both killed in an explosion, in the Murashima Inn, just this evening. Section 2 has determined that nothing survived the blast inside the structure. They found practically no remains, only ashes." He stated coldly. Even if he was verbally declaring his own son's death, as well as that of his cherished 'adoptive' daughter, he would betray nothing. While his ire of the younger Ikari was well documented, he was known to be relatively caring in terms of the First Child.
"We have determined that it was not a random act of violence or terrorism, but rather a planned assassination. We are still investigating who is responsible, though we believe executives in the Japan Industries Jet Alone Project are somehow involved." Fuyutsuki said in a quiet tone, eyeing the command screens, not quite feeling like looking the closest thing the two pilots had to a mother figure in the eye.
Misato tried desperately to maintain her composure in front of the commander and sub-commander, keeping her face blank.
"Operative Ryouji Kaji has been assigned to investigate. I expect your cooperation with him in the operation." There was a pause in the commander's drone, then his eyes narrowed. "Be aware, Katsuragi-chii, I am holding you responsible for this occurrence. It was your ill-advised plan that resulted in lax security."
The director of operations and planning nodded very solemnly, stiffly. "Wakari.Wakarimashita."
"Dismissed."
Afterwards, Misato arrived home, closed her apartment door, made sure she didn't wake Asuka, and then, in the privacy of her room, wept freely in grief and anger. Tears of impotent rage flowed down her cheeks, as she knew no amount of crying would bring Shinji or Rei back.
No, she thought after a while. She would not cry. She would get even.
Terminal Dogma NERV Headquarters, Tokyo-3
The twelve monoliths of SEELE projected themselves around Ikari Gendou. He didn't need to see their faces to know they were not only upset, but angry and disturbed by recent events: all of them were present. That in and of itself was a rarity.
Chairman Kihi was the first to speak, in his guttural, harsh, deeply spoken Japanese. He was infuriated at this setback with the project, which endangered directly the scenario.
"Ikari! You have failed us. This was not in our scenario. You are creating your own scenario, Ikari-kun." He boomed though his insubstantial monolith projection which read, "SEELE 01".
SEELE 12 affirmed the comment in a nasal and abrasive voice. "Sayo! [Aye] Ware ware wa shinpai na desu yo. [We are worried.] We demand you explain yourself!"
There was a chorus of consensus among the other images of nonexistent people. Oh yes there would be hell to pay, if the scenario failed at this juncture. Quite literally so.
From behind stepped fingers and folded hands, the commander of NERV, the man in charge of the first line of defense and the linchpin in the plans for Instrumentality spoke calmly, dismissing the issue.
"There is no cause for worry, the situation is still in our control. The Marduk Agency." he said with derision, for they all knew the truth of that entity's existence and its true nature, "has already found the fourth and fifth children. There will be no problems preparing Unit-01 for a new pilot." Gendou finished, satisfied with his own answer.
If Kihi could have demonstrated a glare, he would have. "You are trifling with us, Ikari. You must ascertain exactly what happened at once. Remember, failure of this magnitude is not tolerated and is punishable by death."
All too smoothly, Gendou acknowledged. "Wakateiru." [I know.]
As the images disappeared into blackness and oblivion, both sides of the argument began to devise their own schemes to find out what really happened to the Eva pilots. None of them, not for a minute believed them actually dead, though none of them equally, were willing to admit to it.
Miyagi Prefecture Japan
Getting to Kagoshima from Osaka, a rather backtrack route, had been successful. However, once in Kagoshima, Rei had determined it necessary to go further north. Much father. In fact, she arranged for cheap discount transport to Miyagi Prefecture, which was in the North East sector of the main island of Honshu. Shinji had protested at first, concerned that it would overtax the expense budget they had to establish themselves with, however he soon became quiet as he realized Rei was much more efficient in terms of figuring out a course of action that would render them hard to find. Miyagi was small enough and far enough away from Okinawa that it would be overlooked, but large enough for them to move in unnoticed.
Once off the train from Akika to Miyagi, the last leg of their journey over, the weary pair moved silently along the flows of pedestrian traffic until they had exited the station itself and were on the street proper. The air was nice, and the sun quite bright. It was warm, and the people seemed rather cheerful, though they looked busy. It wasn't more than eleven in the morning.
When Shinji turned to regard Rei and converse as to how to proceed, he was stunned by the difference he saw in her. Her disguise was pretty generic: she no longer wore the school uniform, though it was smuggled away in a bag, and her azure locks were hidden under a wig of dark brown hair, her eyes possessing solid black irises instead of her normal red. She was garbed simply in a pair of khakis and a dark blouse, satchel bag thrown over a shoulder. She looked like a different person, although he recognized her features.
They'd traveled under assumed names, and now decided to switch them again to be completely assured of their continued clandestine status. Therefore Rei and Shinji took the pseudonyms Asano Kaede and Asano Minoru respectively. They would pose as a young married couple. That idea, while it made him blush slightly for what he felt were childish reasons, seemed appropriate. No one would believe brother and sister were living together alone, at a young age, and nor would anyone want or accept two singles living together. Some parts of Japan were still conservative in that regard, Miyagi one of those places as it were.
Fortunately, as he was about to say something to Rei, he spotted a rack of 'Homes and Apartments Classifieds' in the newsstand just outside the entrance to the mag-lev station and picked one up. The great thing about those types of publications is that they had no cost, thus curbing their expenditures.
"I think this will do, Kaede," he said, 'in character'. He dared not risk using their real names in conversation, even in amidst a crowd of people who could care less.
"Nani, Anata?" [A/N, the pronoun, 'anata' (you) when used in certain circumstances by women, is akin to saying 'dear', though in general the pronoun is viewed by the older generations as fairly rude.] she asked, [What?]
He showed her the classifieds booklet and urged her with a hand motion to continue walking. Rei flipped through the book quickly, looking at a brief district map of Miyagi and then checking out apartments. One in particular caught her attention. It was advertised as 'small, already furnished," but was quite far from the center of town and business areas, where one or both of them would have to work.
Ever the logician, Rei informed Shinji of the locale and conditions. "If we take this apartment, not only can we save money but we can also have an apartment that is more likely to be overlooked. What is your opinion?"
Shinji eyeballed the description briefly, as well as the photo. It looked pretty old, but there was still furniture. Of course they would have to buy bedding, but that was alright, considering. It was a real steal. It felt almost too good to be true.
"You're right, but there has to be something wrong with the apartment for it to be that cheap.what.85000 yen? That's.really low." He stated with apprehension, pointing at the at for emphasis. "But we are low on cash, and we need money for first, last, and security deposit."
"You are correct on the last, however, we cannot afford to not examine it." She replied quietly from his side as they walked in what the map said was the general direction of the neighborhood.
After some more walking, it dawned on both of them to call the owner of the apartment and inquire, to make sure the person was even there. Shinji was the one to place the call, despite his normally timid nature. He figured Rei had done all of the work so far, and it was time they started sharing responsibilities. It would be, after all, key to living in the same house, appearing to the outside world as husband and wife.
Somehow, with a great sense of strangeness, Shinji felt as if it was fitting, in a way, if not portentous. Just the thought made him weak in the knees, though, of living with Rei. It scared him, mostly because he was still unsure of how to act with her. However, he'd decided to make his future with her in his life somehow, at least for now. The least he could do was be a man about it.
With that said it was still hard to translate thoughts into actions.
Tremulously, Shinji spoke with the old woman on the line, who was eager to have a new tenant, she explained, due to the sagging economy. It would be good for the community, she said, for new residents to come in, especially a young couple filled with vitality. The crone seemed nice enough, Shinji thought to himself, so he inquired about directions from their position, and was given the correct information.
"Alright," he said, hanging up the phone, and turning to Rei, who was watching him intently. "I got through.Why are you.staring at me like that? Did I do something wrong, Rei?"
He slipped and only noticed his failure too late. She shook her head and replied simply, "You are changing, that is all. You are less.what others call 'withdrawn'."
'Oh.so ka." He murmured, meeting her contact lens-covered eyes for a brief instant. Together, they walked the three-kilometer route through the city to the outskirts, which were located along a range of sloping hills that formed part of the vaguely bowl-like shape the city was nestled in. from here they could just see the ocean in the far distance.
In that silence they shared until they reached their destination, Rei was thoughtful. The prospect of spending time with Shinji was beginning to grow on her, if only slightly. She'd not really considered that part of their situation until they were already on the flight out of Okinawa to Osaka. She knew now that there would be certain things she would have to do to maintain the reality of the façade they would put up, things she may not immediately be comfortable with, but it was a sacrifice she was willing to make on the behalf of Shinji-kun. One of the reasons she agreed to go along with this plan was because for some reason she did not believe Shinji would be able to do it on his own. She had confidence in him certainly, however, he did not look like the kind of person who could carry himself responsibly alone in the world. He would like to say he could but he would only be lying to himself, self deception.
Thus with a strange, caring feeling, she followed in quiet speculation until they arrived at the apartment building. The old crone, Etsuko, was waiting patiently for them. She looked roughly around sixty-five or so, in Rei's estimation. She wore a bright, cheerfully patterned kimono and a pair of tough-looking sandals. Rei could tell this woman was a fairly traditional Japanese, which were fairly rare after Second Impact. They were rare even before the impact too.
"Ah, the young couple, Asano Minoru-kun, is it?" said Etsuko, greeting them with a slight bow and a wide, toothy smile. Her eyes were almonds in shape and color, her face taunt on the front but with wrinkled sides, and gray hair pulled back in a severe ponytail and done up in a bun.
"Hai, watashi desu." [Yes, its me] said Shinji with a meek voice, stepping forward and offering the landlady a bow. He straightened. "We're interested in the apartment in the ad."
"Of course you are. Come, please, let me show you in. This must be your lovely wife, Asano-san?" she looked at Rei with her beady little eyes, warm and appraising.
Rei found herself trying to fight off a fierce blush, she really didn't like getting that sort of attention, but she replied only with a slight nod. There wasn't much she could do to get rid of her habitual silences.
Etsuko led them through the lobby of the building and onto the second floor via elevator, which was technically the first floor. There were six apartments on each floor and the building had about five floors. It wasn't run down, but it wasn't by any means luxurious or very clean, however it was quiet neat. The signs were all well-organized and names were bold and legible. They were led to one of the first apartments on the second floor, 202. With a key she produced from her small purse, Etsuko opened the door.
The apartment was fairly small. From the entryway one could see the living room, which had a kotatsu table and quilt, a sofa, and a chair facing a balcony facing the city. There were some tatami mats in the living room, all still clean. Once they were led in along the short entryway, they turned right to see the small kitchenette and appliances. To the left of the living room was a sliding door. Etsuko was commenting all the while about the previous tenants-a middle aged pair who couldn't afford to ship all of this with them, moving abroad to America. So they'd just left it all behind, like that. She admitted it was a real boon.
The bedroom itself still tatami mats and a futon, plus a low table and nightstand. A window also looked out into the northeast, where the sun would rise. It was all pretty generic-the furniture was pretty much in good shape but not first rate, and the walls needed some paint. But aside from that, it was complete. The only thing missing was the TV set, which neither Rei nor Shinji cared for.
Rei was examining the sleeping accommodations of the apartment curiously, noting the layout and arrangement. Indeed, a couple had lived here, for there was only a full sized futon, at least apparently. Out of sheer curiosity she padded across the tatami mats (they'd taken their shoes off already) and opened the closet. A dresser was there along with a rolled up futon, as she'd expected. Usually people had a spare for guests. It wasn't uncommon.
Shinji stood out on the balcony observing the breathtaking view of the city. Miyagi itself, the center of Miyagi Prefecture, wasn't very big compared to Tokyo-3 or even Osaka-2. However, it was large enough to look imposing and beautiful in the midday light. He liked the apartment, and thought it fairly fortunate that it was already furnished. It would save them an immense amount of money.
When he turned back, he saw Rei standing behind him expectantly, waiting to hear his assessment of the locale. With a smile, he nodded his affirmation.
"This place looks like it will suit us nicely, Kaede," said the young, former pilot of Unit-01.
Rei, having been silent for nearly an hour now, finally spoke up. Her voice wasn't loud enough to carry to the living room, and was for his ears alone. "Yes, I think we will be able to stay here. I will make the arrangements."
And so, with little fanfare the 'arrangements' were made, Rei making the transaction in the form of hard currency, which she'd exchanged for the money in the foreign account. Such an account, she argued, would immediately draw attention to them and mark them as outsiders. Neither of them could afford that luxury, especially since finally settling down on a particular town. Now they had to literally, live the lie. Old secrets became new lies and old lies became new truths. It was a strange feeling, Rei had, in the pit of her stomach. A giddiness almost, as if everything started -here-.
Shinji watched absently as 'Asano Kaede' took care of the finance and had the first payment, and last payment, plus the security deposit taken care of. In total, they spent about 180000 yen, roughly 1600 U.S. Dollars.
Etsuko, thoroughly satisfied that she had what looked to be stable rent money from a newlywed pair, mustered some thanks and well-wishes and then was gone, leaving the keys after signing the lease for the apartment. She would be by every last of the month to pick up the rent money.
The two companions found themselves unpacking what little belongings they had of their own, in their new shared bedroom. Shinji divided the table into two imaginary 'halves' and separated their normal stuff, such as cards, SDAT player, and other little things both carried. It was symbolic, to both of them, the beginning of something new. They were kneeled in front of the table, its lantern light on, setting their space up, when Rei removed from her bag a small case. Shinji immediately recognized it, and began to feel sick to the stomach.
Inside that case, were the old glasses of his father, NERV Commander Ikari Gendou.
Rei seemed to notice the wide-eyed look Shinji had fixed upon the personal effect, and arched an eyebrow. They had already begun to develop some non- verbal cues, most of which were Shinji picking up on Rei's facial expressions, however limited they were.
"You don't intend to keep those, do you?" he asked earnestly, probing her deep rose eyes for an answer, his heart catching in his throat. Those glasses represented an awful memory of an equally abominable person.
A long time seemed to pass before Rei opened her mouth in a small, surprised 'o'. Eventually, words came. She shook her head no, and said, "I do not. I am no longer his doll. I will not live in the false memories he fostered in me."
Shinji was relieved, letting out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. It was hard enough remembering that he'd dropped everything to do this, his duty, his previous life, but to have to face a daily reminder of why he was forced to take such extreme measures, would be a cruel fate indeed.
"Naruhodo." [indeed], murmured Shinji quietly. He watched as Rei turned her attention to the small window in their bedroom. She rose from her sitting position, the case of glasses in her hands. She opened the beige case with care, then, seemingly in complete opposite of her demeanor, she crushed the frames and lenses with her bare hands, cutting her hands on glass in a couple of places. Then with a sigh of either relief, or was it weariness, she hurled both out the window, watching them clang against the fire escape, then into the abyss of the mountainside that veered downward to form the bowl of the city.
From his vantage point, Shinji watched this spectacle with awe. He really hadn't expected her to give up on that old life so easily. Then he realized that she wasn't 'giving up easily' but rather determined to throw it away and not show the results. It struck him how dedicated she was to a decision once she made it, and warmed his heart to know that she had decided to come with him on this ludicrous escape from NERV.
When she returned to her seat in front of the night table, she looked at Shinji, and flashed him one of her rarest, full smiles. "It is done. There are no things here now that will remind us of what we left behind."
Shinji smiled too, agreeing with her sentiments, at least those he was aware of. Tenuously, he reached out his hand towards hers, wanting to feel connected to her somehow in this quiet moment, to know she was really there. To his surprise, she accepted his hand, and gripped it tightly. Her skin was warm and quite soft, soothing.comforting.
New lies could one day become truths, thought Shinji, for the first time in so long, filled with a reason to live. Beside him, Ayanami Rei sat with Shinji's hand in hers, and a new experience. Now she had the will to live.
A shrine outside Tokyo-3's Outskirts--- (Same Day)
The funeral procession was quite small. In fact, there were very few civilians at all at the proceedings that day in the small shrine on the fogged-over hillsides of Tokyo-3. It was overcast and a tad brisk for most there, so some were in dark coats. Everywhere there were NERV section 2 officers, obtusely keeping guard on the private funeral for two of NERV's fallen operatives, servants of their nation and their human race. The air was solemn and not just thick with fog but with the grief of those present, all who stood in front of two large stone markers on the shrine's burial ground. It was a Shinto-Buddhist funeral held in absentia-that is, there were no bodies to speak of, however some ashes had been gathered up from the Okinawa site, formerly the Murashima Inn. Mr. Murashima himself was in attendance, along with his family, paying respects to their departed patrons, something of a personal choice made by the family to honor the two fallen soldiers of NERV.
The markers were not like those in the so called 'Barren Cemetery" where Ikari Yui's marker had stood for nearly eleven years now. This was something a bit more ornate, something more.personal. The decision had been made on the parts of the Director of Planning and Operations, Captain Katsuragi, and the sub and first commanders, Fuyutsuki and Ikari respectively. Misato had handled the arrangements for Shinji's marker, Gendou having refused any involvement except in that of Rei's.
Now the two stood side by side, in death as they'd been in life, while fighting in Evangelions. They were marked in Kanji: Ikari, Shinji, and Ayanami, Rei. Both had their dates of birth and then death, with two small stars with the romanized letters K.I.A.-Killed In Action. On either side of each marker was a Japanese flag representing their nationality, and on the other, the banner of NERV.
God is in His Heaven. All is right with the World.
For many in attendance, that statement was almost mocking in its lack of truth. The two pilots that had warded off the most angels together were now gone, each leaving a hole in the heart of one person. In Misato, she felt the loss of Shinji, as the son she never had and was never able to properly care for, or even demonstrate appropriate affection without coming out perverted. For Ikari Gendou, it was a loss of his protégé, and the closest tie he had to his wife, and a 'daughter'.
While the Shinto priest went on about the spirits of nature, a Buddhist monk set sticks of incense ablaze, filling the air around them with their intoxicating scent.
In a line were the employees of NERV who knew the pilots best: Misato, Asuka, Dr. Akagi Ritsuko, Lieutenants Ibuki, Hyuga and Aoba, Kaji Ryouji- who, alike the commanders, was dressed in the conservative garb of NERV Command and Control-and of course, both Fuyutsuki and Ikari. Notables among the civilians were Hikari Horaki, Touji Suzuhara, and of course, Aida Kensuke. All three of them were doing their best to keep from crying in front of the others. Hikari was failing, dabbing her cheeks with a handkerchief.
Misato was holding herself well, all things considered. Oh, she'd cried alright, but, she felt as if she had no tears left. Vaguely she imagined that was something Shinji might have said-being sad without tears. Her thoughts went out to the great Void, and whatever lay beyond, and prayed that Shinji and Rei were safe in the hands of whatever kami existed out there. She stood crisply, in full dress uniform, alongside Ritsuko, who looked dispassionate, and Maya, who was somewhere between feeling ill and crying. She'd cared about Shinji as a co-worker and a friend, having been the communications link between Eva-Unit-01 and control, she still had his screams echoing in her head. She sympathized deeply for Shinji and Rei.
"So we thus lay down our dead, for with them are our hearts and prayers, that they shall find in the beyond, the peace which eluded them in life.." said the priest, who wore a traditional white kimono with a stark red hakama, assisted by similarly garbed priestesses. "for their torment has ended and they are now one with the air, the ground, the trees, and the water. We pray for their watching over us as we watched over them, and secure their memory within the eternal walls of our hearts so that in them, they may live unto the end of time."
All of the participants bowed low, the ceremony finished. Each person put a flower, or sometimes a set of flowers on the mantles of the two markers, right next to the photos of the two pilots.
Asuka was having a hard time coming up with a mental summation of how she felt. In the end, she didn't hate Shinji nearly as much as she did the First Child, but even now, she couldn't hold herself to keep such a fierce hatred even in death. She felt that she owed them at least that much respect, because she knew she would have wanted it too. She definitely would have wanted it. Her black skirts shifted as she walked to Shinji's marker and set a white rose on it, stifling a small tear.
"Baka Shinji, make sure not to waste eternal rest." She closed her eyes for the briefest of moments and then made way for others. Each person said a word or two to the deceased, including Ritsuko, who, ironically, told Shinji and Rei to "take care of each other", pointing out neither of them had ever known how to live.
Finally Misato came up to the two markers, and left a bouquet each. "Well, I hope you two can find peace, Shinji. I'm sorry for not being there when you really needed me."
Lastly, after all had left, Kouzou Fuyutsuki and Ikari Gendou stood side by side in front of the two sham graves. Their mood was very indifferent. In fact, they didn't even address the markers and who they represented. Instead, Kouzou gave Gendou a sideways glance.
"Are you sure, Ikari-kun?" he asked pensively, looking at Pilot Ayanami's photo with a bit of melancholia. "We could be wrong."
"I am not wrong, Fuyutsuki-sensei. We cannot distill her soul. She is still alive." Ikari Gendou stared at the stone markers with complete, inner rage. He'd never been so frustrated, with one exception, and that had been when he'd lost his Yui. This was becoming quite tiresome.
We shall see, Ikari, who is right or wrong, thought Fuyutsuki soberly, glancing at Shinji's marker. There best be a way out of this, and right now, he thought he knew why this was going on. And if he had anything to do with it, he was going to give them what they deserved: a fighting chance.
How the sins of the fathers weigh heavily on his shoulders.
(A/N: If you want to know, this last scene was written to the tune of 'Anna ni Issho Datta no ni' -instrumental- from Mobile Suit Gundam SEED. I thought it an appropriate tune)
Asano (Ikari-Ayanami) Residence- Miyagi Prefecture, Japan
It was night. The sun had just set, ending a spectacle of light that shone through the windows of the apartment, reflecting off of buildings, and finally hitting their living room. Both travelers were beginning to settle in, feeling the drain of their sojourn through fear with tired faces and bodies. They'd eaten dinner, which had come in the form of instant ramen that night, they didn't have the means for much else on short notice. Soon the hunt for jobs would commence, so that they could continue this existence further. However, right now, both of them really didn't feel like thinking to the next day. Rather, they were content on eating their noodles on the low kotatsu table, across from each other, with most of the lights out. The city was bright with its artificial lights below, and there was a sense of peace in the 'Asano' apartment.
Shinji finally finished his ramen and got up to rinse the bowl and his chopsticks. When he was done, he was in the bathroom that was adjacent their bedroom, washing up for the night. Rei followed suit wordlessly afterwards, until they were both in their room, sliding the door behind them.
The only light was that from the small table lamp. It lay to one side, and the two futons were laid out on the tatamis a good distance away from each other. Shinji insisted that Rei take the full-sized one, for her because she had worked so hard, and he didn't need it anyways. She'd reluctantly accepted, being used to only the bare minimum in life.
When they lay in their respective beds for the night, Rei killed the lights. In the darkness, there was only the sound of their breathing. Then:
"Oyasuminasai, Shinji-kun." Rei called out from her side of the room, her voice carrying to his ears like the comforting melody it had always been to him, bringing him peace.
"Oyasumi.Rei-san. Yasashii no yume desu yo." [Sweet dreams] he replied softly, smiling despite himself. He felt that he had enough courage to say that kind statement.
To his surprise, she responded, "Anata mo." [You too.]
Shinji, exhausted from their flight, both literally and metaphorically, immediately fell asleep on the soft futon and pillow. He silently thanked whatever gods there were for their safe arrival before finally submitting to the darkness of sleep.
A meter and a half beside him, Rei was still awake, trying to sort out some thoughts. Most of them had to do with Shinji. She really never imagined herself living with someone else. But now that she'd spent considerable time with Shinji in the last few days, she was beginning to realize he was not a difficult person to deal with. In fact, she was growing fond of his constant company. He did as much as he could to make her feel safe and protected, as well as to feel cared for.even loved. She felt that was important to her now, because the only 'ties' she had now were to Shinji. She could not afford to lose him at this point. She didn't know how she would be able to do it without him. He was the one who'd actually lived a life that didn't simply consist of experimentations and orders. He'd a life before Tokyo-3. A semi-normal one albeit, but more experience than her, and she found herself depending on that experience. While she did, in fact, handle the finances, it was he who'd found the apartment and led them there, called Etsuko, and so on.
How did she feel now about him? Did this need arise of something else? A caring deeper than just two runaways with no one else? Or was it because they had no one else and therefore, were obligated to be closer? She did not know. She felt that now more than ever, a bond was growing between them, not only of mutual concern for safety, like they had as pilots, but for emotions, feelings.for each other. Rei found herself.contented when she remembered Shinji was nearby.
And that nearby Shinji, at that moment late in the night, had decided to become quite vocal. He was rolling about in his sleep, mumbling things. She watched him though the light from the city coming trough one of the windows and saw his mouth move, and then words came out.
"Rei.no.don't..please.Otosan, .yameru! [STOP THAT!].Rei.don't die.Rei.." His face, with eyes twitching in the throes of REM sleep, contorted in agony and fear. Rei, in reality was powerless to stop it.
She realized he was having a nightmare. Immediately, a memory surfaced in her mind: the first time she'd met him. It had been during the approach of the 3rd Angel, Sachiel, when Rei was still in the clutches of her injuries from Unit-00's failed activation test. She'd been spilled onto the gantry, and then, the next thing she knew, Shinji was holding her in his arms, trying to comfort her and shield her, right before he jumped into EVA Unit 01 for the first time. She remembered how good it felt to at least know someone cared in the slightest, to feel that warmth.
Without hesitation, Rei rose from her bed and dragged her futon up against Shinji's even as he was still thrashing about like a fish out of water, muttering curses and calling out Rei's name in desperation, then his classic line: I mustn't run away.
She slipped back into her own bed and then rolled over to Shinji, and as gently as she could, wrapped her arms around him tightly, holding him still, pressing her warmth against him. He felt cold and damp with sweat, and was trembling. Almost immediately, he began to ease, and his motions became smaller until he stopped altogether. An absent arm wrapped itself around Rei and held on for dear life.
Satisfied that Shinji was safe in the dreamscape of his mind, Rei rested her head on the pillow next to Shinji's and closed her eyes for the night.
-Author's Notes: Heh. Chapter Three: DONE. I hope you enjoyed it. It took a bit of doing to put together this one because the threads are starting to become more distinct. Oh, yes, and I promise to have some more Kaji in there like I said I would. And before the topic even becomes an issue, I want to address the entire Rei-Shinji thing: Rei and Shinji are in no way related. Rei is only half-human at best, making her not even technically the same species as Shinji. Genetically speaking, the only things that link them are mitochondrial DNA and other traits that are common among human beings, Yui's DNA aside: There was only enough to give her human form similar to Yui. That is a significantly SMALL piece of DNA. At best, Rei and Shinji are different genus of a species-family.
Also, to those of you who have been replying over the -kun, -san bit, well, here's the scoop: Yes, you can use -kun with girls although it's a bit rare and outmoded. There are only specific times when it is appropriate to be used with girls. Shinji and Rei up until very recently, had a strictly business relationship, and using -kun indicates someone of equal or lesser status, regardless of gender. Its somewhat natural that Shinji use that honorific at that point. He changes to -san mostly because he's unsure of what to make of her, and -chan is far too informal at this juncture (at least for now lol).
Thanks for all your reviews and support, I appreciate it very much. I hope to finish chapter four sometime within the next week for New Years. Look forward to: Finding jobs, finding secrets (Yeah, Kaji!) awkward moments, happy moments, and lots more in Chapter Four (The title is borrowed) The Sun Also Rises.
So if I don't get it out by the holidays, on behalf of the Kazuhiko residence: Kurisumasu Omedeto gozaimasu!
-Kazuhiko Kazuki
Disclaimer: All characters, everything, including my soul, are the express property of Gainax Co. and the respective copyright holders of Shinseki Evangelion (Neon Genesis Evangelion), and so are the ramen noodles I stole from them yesterday!
Chapter Three: New Lies, Old Secrets
Katsuragi - Langley Residence
Higashi District, Tokyo-3
The door to the apartment in the outskirts of the fortress city of Tokyo-3 slid aside easily at the command of its owner. That owner, bedraggled and disheveled, stumbled inside, unable to go much further. In one hand was a briefcase, in the other a six pack of Yebisu beer, draft. The person's clothes looked slept in and her face worn out. It had been a long day, and she felt only half as good as she looked.
Captain Katsuragi Misato of NERV made her way silently into her apartment, tossing her papers and briefcase on the dining table, passing the living room completely, and closing the door to her room behind her. With little fanfare she sagged onto her futon and cracked open a beer. She felt like taking a dive before going to sleep, at least for the stress-reliving value of alcohol as much as for thirst.
Working without two of her pilots had been a risk, however a calculated one. Not only was there little time since the last Angel attack, but there was still one highly trained pilot on-base. This would ensure that there was at least some time to collect Shinji and Rei should hell break loose in the city. Still, she was a bit nervous about the entire affair. It did, in fact, translate to much more administrative juggling on her part. Not only did synch tests need to be moved around, but also they had to continually run drills with Asuka and the command staff to keep everyone in peak performance while shorthanded.
When she could take no more of this 'awake' business, Misato did nothing. Rather, gravity helped her unceremoniously into bed as she fell backwards onto the still unmade futon and its pillow. She hadn't even bothered to throw away her empty cans.
Seemingly far too soon after she gained the black whispering abyss of sleep, she was jostled awake by the shrill sound of the phone ringing. Groggily, with an unsteady hand, she reached for the receiver, and picked up, her head still under the covers.
"Moshi moshi, Katsuragi desu." Greeted Misato in a slurring voice. She listened to the speaker on the other end for twenty seconds.
"NANI?! MASAKA!" [What? Impossible!] she yelled into the receiver, probably exploding the other person's eardrum. Well eardrums aside, he replied and demanded her presence at NERV immediately.
"Hai..so.so ka..Wakarimashita." [Yes, uh huh, I see, Understood.] she hung up, practically slamming the phone as she rolled over and stared, or rather, glared at the ceiling. Something had gone terribly, inexplicably wrong, and possibly the worst thing in the world just happened.
The children were dead.
Central Dogma NERV Headquarters, Tokyo-3 Geofront
Misato strode onto the command level of the Operations Command and Control Center, her face a mess but her eyes hard and red. Her hair was still a bird's nest of strands going in every which direction. As she passed the security checkpoint, NERV Section 2 officers snapped to immediate attention.
In the control center, sub-commander Fuyutsuki and commander Ikari were already waiting. The older man, Fuyutsuki, somewhere in his sixties, long having gone gray, looked very grim. Ikari, however, always looked grim, so Misato could not get much of a read of him. It wasn't like that wasn't normal to begin with. Also roused from bed was Dr. Akagi and First Lieutenant Ibuki. Both women were silent and solemn, however Ritsuko appeared quite indifferent, while Maya herself was obviously upset but trying to follow her mentor's lead.
"Sir." Misato stopped crisply in front of the commander and his majordomo. Ikari nodded almost imperceptibly. The stare he was giving her, she could tell, was his 'angry' stare, the telltale sine was that his hands were clasped behind his back, and he stood with even more imposition and was practically radiating malice in sickening waves. Misato found that she had to take a steadying breath before she could continue.
"I was informed, though without any details. What..what happened, sir?" she asked in a tremor that was weaker than she'd intented.
Gendou hesitated several seconds, drawing out the silence no doubt for shock effect, only after the air was stale did he finish waiting to make his address to his subordinate.
"Pilots Ayanami and Ikari were both killed in an explosion, in the Murashima Inn, just this evening. Section 2 has determined that nothing survived the blast inside the structure. They found practically no remains, only ashes." He stated coldly. Even if he was verbally declaring his own son's death, as well as that of his cherished 'adoptive' daughter, he would betray nothing. While his ire of the younger Ikari was well documented, he was known to be relatively caring in terms of the First Child.
"We have determined that it was not a random act of violence or terrorism, but rather a planned assassination. We are still investigating who is responsible, though we believe executives in the Japan Industries Jet Alone Project are somehow involved." Fuyutsuki said in a quiet tone, eyeing the command screens, not quite feeling like looking the closest thing the two pilots had to a mother figure in the eye.
Misato tried desperately to maintain her composure in front of the commander and sub-commander, keeping her face blank.
"Operative Ryouji Kaji has been assigned to investigate. I expect your cooperation with him in the operation." There was a pause in the commander's drone, then his eyes narrowed. "Be aware, Katsuragi-chii, I am holding you responsible for this occurrence. It was your ill-advised plan that resulted in lax security."
The director of operations and planning nodded very solemnly, stiffly. "Wakari.Wakarimashita."
"Dismissed."
Afterwards, Misato arrived home, closed her apartment door, made sure she didn't wake Asuka, and then, in the privacy of her room, wept freely in grief and anger. Tears of impotent rage flowed down her cheeks, as she knew no amount of crying would bring Shinji or Rei back.
No, she thought after a while. She would not cry. She would get even.
Terminal Dogma NERV Headquarters, Tokyo-3
The twelve monoliths of SEELE projected themselves around Ikari Gendou. He didn't need to see their faces to know they were not only upset, but angry and disturbed by recent events: all of them were present. That in and of itself was a rarity.
Chairman Kihi was the first to speak, in his guttural, harsh, deeply spoken Japanese. He was infuriated at this setback with the project, which endangered directly the scenario.
"Ikari! You have failed us. This was not in our scenario. You are creating your own scenario, Ikari-kun." He boomed though his insubstantial monolith projection which read, "SEELE 01".
SEELE 12 affirmed the comment in a nasal and abrasive voice. "Sayo! [Aye] Ware ware wa shinpai na desu yo. [We are worried.] We demand you explain yourself!"
There was a chorus of consensus among the other images of nonexistent people. Oh yes there would be hell to pay, if the scenario failed at this juncture. Quite literally so.
From behind stepped fingers and folded hands, the commander of NERV, the man in charge of the first line of defense and the linchpin in the plans for Instrumentality spoke calmly, dismissing the issue.
"There is no cause for worry, the situation is still in our control. The Marduk Agency." he said with derision, for they all knew the truth of that entity's existence and its true nature, "has already found the fourth and fifth children. There will be no problems preparing Unit-01 for a new pilot." Gendou finished, satisfied with his own answer.
If Kihi could have demonstrated a glare, he would have. "You are trifling with us, Ikari. You must ascertain exactly what happened at once. Remember, failure of this magnitude is not tolerated and is punishable by death."
All too smoothly, Gendou acknowledged. "Wakateiru." [I know.]
As the images disappeared into blackness and oblivion, both sides of the argument began to devise their own schemes to find out what really happened to the Eva pilots. None of them, not for a minute believed them actually dead, though none of them equally, were willing to admit to it.
Miyagi Prefecture Japan
Getting to Kagoshima from Osaka, a rather backtrack route, had been successful. However, once in Kagoshima, Rei had determined it necessary to go further north. Much father. In fact, she arranged for cheap discount transport to Miyagi Prefecture, which was in the North East sector of the main island of Honshu. Shinji had protested at first, concerned that it would overtax the expense budget they had to establish themselves with, however he soon became quiet as he realized Rei was much more efficient in terms of figuring out a course of action that would render them hard to find. Miyagi was small enough and far enough away from Okinawa that it would be overlooked, but large enough for them to move in unnoticed.
Once off the train from Akika to Miyagi, the last leg of their journey over, the weary pair moved silently along the flows of pedestrian traffic until they had exited the station itself and were on the street proper. The air was nice, and the sun quite bright. It was warm, and the people seemed rather cheerful, though they looked busy. It wasn't more than eleven in the morning.
When Shinji turned to regard Rei and converse as to how to proceed, he was stunned by the difference he saw in her. Her disguise was pretty generic: she no longer wore the school uniform, though it was smuggled away in a bag, and her azure locks were hidden under a wig of dark brown hair, her eyes possessing solid black irises instead of her normal red. She was garbed simply in a pair of khakis and a dark blouse, satchel bag thrown over a shoulder. She looked like a different person, although he recognized her features.
They'd traveled under assumed names, and now decided to switch them again to be completely assured of their continued clandestine status. Therefore Rei and Shinji took the pseudonyms Asano Kaede and Asano Minoru respectively. They would pose as a young married couple. That idea, while it made him blush slightly for what he felt were childish reasons, seemed appropriate. No one would believe brother and sister were living together alone, at a young age, and nor would anyone want or accept two singles living together. Some parts of Japan were still conservative in that regard, Miyagi one of those places as it were.
Fortunately, as he was about to say something to Rei, he spotted a rack of 'Homes and Apartments Classifieds' in the newsstand just outside the entrance to the mag-lev station and picked one up. The great thing about those types of publications is that they had no cost, thus curbing their expenditures.
"I think this will do, Kaede," he said, 'in character'. He dared not risk using their real names in conversation, even in amidst a crowd of people who could care less.
"Nani, Anata?" [A/N, the pronoun, 'anata' (you) when used in certain circumstances by women, is akin to saying 'dear', though in general the pronoun is viewed by the older generations as fairly rude.] she asked, [What?]
He showed her the classifieds booklet and urged her with a hand motion to continue walking. Rei flipped through the book quickly, looking at a brief district map of Miyagi and then checking out apartments. One in particular caught her attention. It was advertised as 'small, already furnished," but was quite far from the center of town and business areas, where one or both of them would have to work.
Ever the logician, Rei informed Shinji of the locale and conditions. "If we take this apartment, not only can we save money but we can also have an apartment that is more likely to be overlooked. What is your opinion?"
Shinji eyeballed the description briefly, as well as the photo. It looked pretty old, but there was still furniture. Of course they would have to buy bedding, but that was alright, considering. It was a real steal. It felt almost too good to be true.
"You're right, but there has to be something wrong with the apartment for it to be that cheap.what.85000 yen? That's.really low." He stated with apprehension, pointing at the at for emphasis. "But we are low on cash, and we need money for first, last, and security deposit."
"You are correct on the last, however, we cannot afford to not examine it." She replied quietly from his side as they walked in what the map said was the general direction of the neighborhood.
After some more walking, it dawned on both of them to call the owner of the apartment and inquire, to make sure the person was even there. Shinji was the one to place the call, despite his normally timid nature. He figured Rei had done all of the work so far, and it was time they started sharing responsibilities. It would be, after all, key to living in the same house, appearing to the outside world as husband and wife.
Somehow, with a great sense of strangeness, Shinji felt as if it was fitting, in a way, if not portentous. Just the thought made him weak in the knees, though, of living with Rei. It scared him, mostly because he was still unsure of how to act with her. However, he'd decided to make his future with her in his life somehow, at least for now. The least he could do was be a man about it.
With that said it was still hard to translate thoughts into actions.
Tremulously, Shinji spoke with the old woman on the line, who was eager to have a new tenant, she explained, due to the sagging economy. It would be good for the community, she said, for new residents to come in, especially a young couple filled with vitality. The crone seemed nice enough, Shinji thought to himself, so he inquired about directions from their position, and was given the correct information.
"Alright," he said, hanging up the phone, and turning to Rei, who was watching him intently. "I got through.Why are you.staring at me like that? Did I do something wrong, Rei?"
He slipped and only noticed his failure too late. She shook her head and replied simply, "You are changing, that is all. You are less.what others call 'withdrawn'."
'Oh.so ka." He murmured, meeting her contact lens-covered eyes for a brief instant. Together, they walked the three-kilometer route through the city to the outskirts, which were located along a range of sloping hills that formed part of the vaguely bowl-like shape the city was nestled in. from here they could just see the ocean in the far distance.
In that silence they shared until they reached their destination, Rei was thoughtful. The prospect of spending time with Shinji was beginning to grow on her, if only slightly. She'd not really considered that part of their situation until they were already on the flight out of Okinawa to Osaka. She knew now that there would be certain things she would have to do to maintain the reality of the façade they would put up, things she may not immediately be comfortable with, but it was a sacrifice she was willing to make on the behalf of Shinji-kun. One of the reasons she agreed to go along with this plan was because for some reason she did not believe Shinji would be able to do it on his own. She had confidence in him certainly, however, he did not look like the kind of person who could carry himself responsibly alone in the world. He would like to say he could but he would only be lying to himself, self deception.
Thus with a strange, caring feeling, she followed in quiet speculation until they arrived at the apartment building. The old crone, Etsuko, was waiting patiently for them. She looked roughly around sixty-five or so, in Rei's estimation. She wore a bright, cheerfully patterned kimono and a pair of tough-looking sandals. Rei could tell this woman was a fairly traditional Japanese, which were fairly rare after Second Impact. They were rare even before the impact too.
"Ah, the young couple, Asano Minoru-kun, is it?" said Etsuko, greeting them with a slight bow and a wide, toothy smile. Her eyes were almonds in shape and color, her face taunt on the front but with wrinkled sides, and gray hair pulled back in a severe ponytail and done up in a bun.
"Hai, watashi desu." [Yes, its me] said Shinji with a meek voice, stepping forward and offering the landlady a bow. He straightened. "We're interested in the apartment in the ad."
"Of course you are. Come, please, let me show you in. This must be your lovely wife, Asano-san?" she looked at Rei with her beady little eyes, warm and appraising.
Rei found herself trying to fight off a fierce blush, she really didn't like getting that sort of attention, but she replied only with a slight nod. There wasn't much she could do to get rid of her habitual silences.
Etsuko led them through the lobby of the building and onto the second floor via elevator, which was technically the first floor. There were six apartments on each floor and the building had about five floors. It wasn't run down, but it wasn't by any means luxurious or very clean, however it was quiet neat. The signs were all well-organized and names were bold and legible. They were led to one of the first apartments on the second floor, 202. With a key she produced from her small purse, Etsuko opened the door.
The apartment was fairly small. From the entryway one could see the living room, which had a kotatsu table and quilt, a sofa, and a chair facing a balcony facing the city. There were some tatami mats in the living room, all still clean. Once they were led in along the short entryway, they turned right to see the small kitchenette and appliances. To the left of the living room was a sliding door. Etsuko was commenting all the while about the previous tenants-a middle aged pair who couldn't afford to ship all of this with them, moving abroad to America. So they'd just left it all behind, like that. She admitted it was a real boon.
The bedroom itself still tatami mats and a futon, plus a low table and nightstand. A window also looked out into the northeast, where the sun would rise. It was all pretty generic-the furniture was pretty much in good shape but not first rate, and the walls needed some paint. But aside from that, it was complete. The only thing missing was the TV set, which neither Rei nor Shinji cared for.
Rei was examining the sleeping accommodations of the apartment curiously, noting the layout and arrangement. Indeed, a couple had lived here, for there was only a full sized futon, at least apparently. Out of sheer curiosity she padded across the tatami mats (they'd taken their shoes off already) and opened the closet. A dresser was there along with a rolled up futon, as she'd expected. Usually people had a spare for guests. It wasn't uncommon.
Shinji stood out on the balcony observing the breathtaking view of the city. Miyagi itself, the center of Miyagi Prefecture, wasn't very big compared to Tokyo-3 or even Osaka-2. However, it was large enough to look imposing and beautiful in the midday light. He liked the apartment, and thought it fairly fortunate that it was already furnished. It would save them an immense amount of money.
When he turned back, he saw Rei standing behind him expectantly, waiting to hear his assessment of the locale. With a smile, he nodded his affirmation.
"This place looks like it will suit us nicely, Kaede," said the young, former pilot of Unit-01.
Rei, having been silent for nearly an hour now, finally spoke up. Her voice wasn't loud enough to carry to the living room, and was for his ears alone. "Yes, I think we will be able to stay here. I will make the arrangements."
And so, with little fanfare the 'arrangements' were made, Rei making the transaction in the form of hard currency, which she'd exchanged for the money in the foreign account. Such an account, she argued, would immediately draw attention to them and mark them as outsiders. Neither of them could afford that luxury, especially since finally settling down on a particular town. Now they had to literally, live the lie. Old secrets became new lies and old lies became new truths. It was a strange feeling, Rei had, in the pit of her stomach. A giddiness almost, as if everything started -here-.
Shinji watched absently as 'Asano Kaede' took care of the finance and had the first payment, and last payment, plus the security deposit taken care of. In total, they spent about 180000 yen, roughly 1600 U.S. Dollars.
Etsuko, thoroughly satisfied that she had what looked to be stable rent money from a newlywed pair, mustered some thanks and well-wishes and then was gone, leaving the keys after signing the lease for the apartment. She would be by every last of the month to pick up the rent money.
The two companions found themselves unpacking what little belongings they had of their own, in their new shared bedroom. Shinji divided the table into two imaginary 'halves' and separated their normal stuff, such as cards, SDAT player, and other little things both carried. It was symbolic, to both of them, the beginning of something new. They were kneeled in front of the table, its lantern light on, setting their space up, when Rei removed from her bag a small case. Shinji immediately recognized it, and began to feel sick to the stomach.
Inside that case, were the old glasses of his father, NERV Commander Ikari Gendou.
Rei seemed to notice the wide-eyed look Shinji had fixed upon the personal effect, and arched an eyebrow. They had already begun to develop some non- verbal cues, most of which were Shinji picking up on Rei's facial expressions, however limited they were.
"You don't intend to keep those, do you?" he asked earnestly, probing her deep rose eyes for an answer, his heart catching in his throat. Those glasses represented an awful memory of an equally abominable person.
A long time seemed to pass before Rei opened her mouth in a small, surprised 'o'. Eventually, words came. She shook her head no, and said, "I do not. I am no longer his doll. I will not live in the false memories he fostered in me."
Shinji was relieved, letting out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. It was hard enough remembering that he'd dropped everything to do this, his duty, his previous life, but to have to face a daily reminder of why he was forced to take such extreme measures, would be a cruel fate indeed.
"Naruhodo." [indeed], murmured Shinji quietly. He watched as Rei turned her attention to the small window in their bedroom. She rose from her sitting position, the case of glasses in her hands. She opened the beige case with care, then, seemingly in complete opposite of her demeanor, she crushed the frames and lenses with her bare hands, cutting her hands on glass in a couple of places. Then with a sigh of either relief, or was it weariness, she hurled both out the window, watching them clang against the fire escape, then into the abyss of the mountainside that veered downward to form the bowl of the city.
From his vantage point, Shinji watched this spectacle with awe. He really hadn't expected her to give up on that old life so easily. Then he realized that she wasn't 'giving up easily' but rather determined to throw it away and not show the results. It struck him how dedicated she was to a decision once she made it, and warmed his heart to know that she had decided to come with him on this ludicrous escape from NERV.
When she returned to her seat in front of the night table, she looked at Shinji, and flashed him one of her rarest, full smiles. "It is done. There are no things here now that will remind us of what we left behind."
Shinji smiled too, agreeing with her sentiments, at least those he was aware of. Tenuously, he reached out his hand towards hers, wanting to feel connected to her somehow in this quiet moment, to know she was really there. To his surprise, she accepted his hand, and gripped it tightly. Her skin was warm and quite soft, soothing.comforting.
New lies could one day become truths, thought Shinji, for the first time in so long, filled with a reason to live. Beside him, Ayanami Rei sat with Shinji's hand in hers, and a new experience. Now she had the will to live.
A shrine outside Tokyo-3's Outskirts--- (Same Day)
The funeral procession was quite small. In fact, there were very few civilians at all at the proceedings that day in the small shrine on the fogged-over hillsides of Tokyo-3. It was overcast and a tad brisk for most there, so some were in dark coats. Everywhere there were NERV section 2 officers, obtusely keeping guard on the private funeral for two of NERV's fallen operatives, servants of their nation and their human race. The air was solemn and not just thick with fog but with the grief of those present, all who stood in front of two large stone markers on the shrine's burial ground. It was a Shinto-Buddhist funeral held in absentia-that is, there were no bodies to speak of, however some ashes had been gathered up from the Okinawa site, formerly the Murashima Inn. Mr. Murashima himself was in attendance, along with his family, paying respects to their departed patrons, something of a personal choice made by the family to honor the two fallen soldiers of NERV.
The markers were not like those in the so called 'Barren Cemetery" where Ikari Yui's marker had stood for nearly eleven years now. This was something a bit more ornate, something more.personal. The decision had been made on the parts of the Director of Planning and Operations, Captain Katsuragi, and the sub and first commanders, Fuyutsuki and Ikari respectively. Misato had handled the arrangements for Shinji's marker, Gendou having refused any involvement except in that of Rei's.
Now the two stood side by side, in death as they'd been in life, while fighting in Evangelions. They were marked in Kanji: Ikari, Shinji, and Ayanami, Rei. Both had their dates of birth and then death, with two small stars with the romanized letters K.I.A.-Killed In Action. On either side of each marker was a Japanese flag representing their nationality, and on the other, the banner of NERV.
God is in His Heaven. All is right with the World.
For many in attendance, that statement was almost mocking in its lack of truth. The two pilots that had warded off the most angels together were now gone, each leaving a hole in the heart of one person. In Misato, she felt the loss of Shinji, as the son she never had and was never able to properly care for, or even demonstrate appropriate affection without coming out perverted. For Ikari Gendou, it was a loss of his protégé, and the closest tie he had to his wife, and a 'daughter'.
While the Shinto priest went on about the spirits of nature, a Buddhist monk set sticks of incense ablaze, filling the air around them with their intoxicating scent.
In a line were the employees of NERV who knew the pilots best: Misato, Asuka, Dr. Akagi Ritsuko, Lieutenants Ibuki, Hyuga and Aoba, Kaji Ryouji- who, alike the commanders, was dressed in the conservative garb of NERV Command and Control-and of course, both Fuyutsuki and Ikari. Notables among the civilians were Hikari Horaki, Touji Suzuhara, and of course, Aida Kensuke. All three of them were doing their best to keep from crying in front of the others. Hikari was failing, dabbing her cheeks with a handkerchief.
Misato was holding herself well, all things considered. Oh, she'd cried alright, but, she felt as if she had no tears left. Vaguely she imagined that was something Shinji might have said-being sad without tears. Her thoughts went out to the great Void, and whatever lay beyond, and prayed that Shinji and Rei were safe in the hands of whatever kami existed out there. She stood crisply, in full dress uniform, alongside Ritsuko, who looked dispassionate, and Maya, who was somewhere between feeling ill and crying. She'd cared about Shinji as a co-worker and a friend, having been the communications link between Eva-Unit-01 and control, she still had his screams echoing in her head. She sympathized deeply for Shinji and Rei.
"So we thus lay down our dead, for with them are our hearts and prayers, that they shall find in the beyond, the peace which eluded them in life.." said the priest, who wore a traditional white kimono with a stark red hakama, assisted by similarly garbed priestesses. "for their torment has ended and they are now one with the air, the ground, the trees, and the water. We pray for their watching over us as we watched over them, and secure their memory within the eternal walls of our hearts so that in them, they may live unto the end of time."
All of the participants bowed low, the ceremony finished. Each person put a flower, or sometimes a set of flowers on the mantles of the two markers, right next to the photos of the two pilots.
Asuka was having a hard time coming up with a mental summation of how she felt. In the end, she didn't hate Shinji nearly as much as she did the First Child, but even now, she couldn't hold herself to keep such a fierce hatred even in death. She felt that she owed them at least that much respect, because she knew she would have wanted it too. She definitely would have wanted it. Her black skirts shifted as she walked to Shinji's marker and set a white rose on it, stifling a small tear.
"Baka Shinji, make sure not to waste eternal rest." She closed her eyes for the briefest of moments and then made way for others. Each person said a word or two to the deceased, including Ritsuko, who, ironically, told Shinji and Rei to "take care of each other", pointing out neither of them had ever known how to live.
Finally Misato came up to the two markers, and left a bouquet each. "Well, I hope you two can find peace, Shinji. I'm sorry for not being there when you really needed me."
Lastly, after all had left, Kouzou Fuyutsuki and Ikari Gendou stood side by side in front of the two sham graves. Their mood was very indifferent. In fact, they didn't even address the markers and who they represented. Instead, Kouzou gave Gendou a sideways glance.
"Are you sure, Ikari-kun?" he asked pensively, looking at Pilot Ayanami's photo with a bit of melancholia. "We could be wrong."
"I am not wrong, Fuyutsuki-sensei. We cannot distill her soul. She is still alive." Ikari Gendou stared at the stone markers with complete, inner rage. He'd never been so frustrated, with one exception, and that had been when he'd lost his Yui. This was becoming quite tiresome.
We shall see, Ikari, who is right or wrong, thought Fuyutsuki soberly, glancing at Shinji's marker. There best be a way out of this, and right now, he thought he knew why this was going on. And if he had anything to do with it, he was going to give them what they deserved: a fighting chance.
How the sins of the fathers weigh heavily on his shoulders.
(A/N: If you want to know, this last scene was written to the tune of 'Anna ni Issho Datta no ni' -instrumental- from Mobile Suit Gundam SEED. I thought it an appropriate tune)
Asano (Ikari-Ayanami) Residence- Miyagi Prefecture, Japan
It was night. The sun had just set, ending a spectacle of light that shone through the windows of the apartment, reflecting off of buildings, and finally hitting their living room. Both travelers were beginning to settle in, feeling the drain of their sojourn through fear with tired faces and bodies. They'd eaten dinner, which had come in the form of instant ramen that night, they didn't have the means for much else on short notice. Soon the hunt for jobs would commence, so that they could continue this existence further. However, right now, both of them really didn't feel like thinking to the next day. Rather, they were content on eating their noodles on the low kotatsu table, across from each other, with most of the lights out. The city was bright with its artificial lights below, and there was a sense of peace in the 'Asano' apartment.
Shinji finally finished his ramen and got up to rinse the bowl and his chopsticks. When he was done, he was in the bathroom that was adjacent their bedroom, washing up for the night. Rei followed suit wordlessly afterwards, until they were both in their room, sliding the door behind them.
The only light was that from the small table lamp. It lay to one side, and the two futons were laid out on the tatamis a good distance away from each other. Shinji insisted that Rei take the full-sized one, for her because she had worked so hard, and he didn't need it anyways. She'd reluctantly accepted, being used to only the bare minimum in life.
When they lay in their respective beds for the night, Rei killed the lights. In the darkness, there was only the sound of their breathing. Then:
"Oyasuminasai, Shinji-kun." Rei called out from her side of the room, her voice carrying to his ears like the comforting melody it had always been to him, bringing him peace.
"Oyasumi.Rei-san. Yasashii no yume desu yo." [Sweet dreams] he replied softly, smiling despite himself. He felt that he had enough courage to say that kind statement.
To his surprise, she responded, "Anata mo." [You too.]
Shinji, exhausted from their flight, both literally and metaphorically, immediately fell asleep on the soft futon and pillow. He silently thanked whatever gods there were for their safe arrival before finally submitting to the darkness of sleep.
A meter and a half beside him, Rei was still awake, trying to sort out some thoughts. Most of them had to do with Shinji. She really never imagined herself living with someone else. But now that she'd spent considerable time with Shinji in the last few days, she was beginning to realize he was not a difficult person to deal with. In fact, she was growing fond of his constant company. He did as much as he could to make her feel safe and protected, as well as to feel cared for.even loved. She felt that was important to her now, because the only 'ties' she had now were to Shinji. She could not afford to lose him at this point. She didn't know how she would be able to do it without him. He was the one who'd actually lived a life that didn't simply consist of experimentations and orders. He'd a life before Tokyo-3. A semi-normal one albeit, but more experience than her, and she found herself depending on that experience. While she did, in fact, handle the finances, it was he who'd found the apartment and led them there, called Etsuko, and so on.
How did she feel now about him? Did this need arise of something else? A caring deeper than just two runaways with no one else? Or was it because they had no one else and therefore, were obligated to be closer? She did not know. She felt that now more than ever, a bond was growing between them, not only of mutual concern for safety, like they had as pilots, but for emotions, feelings.for each other. Rei found herself.contented when she remembered Shinji was nearby.
And that nearby Shinji, at that moment late in the night, had decided to become quite vocal. He was rolling about in his sleep, mumbling things. She watched him though the light from the city coming trough one of the windows and saw his mouth move, and then words came out.
"Rei.no.don't..please.Otosan, .yameru! [STOP THAT!].Rei.don't die.Rei.." His face, with eyes twitching in the throes of REM sleep, contorted in agony and fear. Rei, in reality was powerless to stop it.
She realized he was having a nightmare. Immediately, a memory surfaced in her mind: the first time she'd met him. It had been during the approach of the 3rd Angel, Sachiel, when Rei was still in the clutches of her injuries from Unit-00's failed activation test. She'd been spilled onto the gantry, and then, the next thing she knew, Shinji was holding her in his arms, trying to comfort her and shield her, right before he jumped into EVA Unit 01 for the first time. She remembered how good it felt to at least know someone cared in the slightest, to feel that warmth.
Without hesitation, Rei rose from her bed and dragged her futon up against Shinji's even as he was still thrashing about like a fish out of water, muttering curses and calling out Rei's name in desperation, then his classic line: I mustn't run away.
She slipped back into her own bed and then rolled over to Shinji, and as gently as she could, wrapped her arms around him tightly, holding him still, pressing her warmth against him. He felt cold and damp with sweat, and was trembling. Almost immediately, he began to ease, and his motions became smaller until he stopped altogether. An absent arm wrapped itself around Rei and held on for dear life.
Satisfied that Shinji was safe in the dreamscape of his mind, Rei rested her head on the pillow next to Shinji's and closed her eyes for the night.
-Author's Notes: Heh. Chapter Three: DONE. I hope you enjoyed it. It took a bit of doing to put together this one because the threads are starting to become more distinct. Oh, yes, and I promise to have some more Kaji in there like I said I would. And before the topic even becomes an issue, I want to address the entire Rei-Shinji thing: Rei and Shinji are in no way related. Rei is only half-human at best, making her not even technically the same species as Shinji. Genetically speaking, the only things that link them are mitochondrial DNA and other traits that are common among human beings, Yui's DNA aside: There was only enough to give her human form similar to Yui. That is a significantly SMALL piece of DNA. At best, Rei and Shinji are different genus of a species-family.
Also, to those of you who have been replying over the -kun, -san bit, well, here's the scoop: Yes, you can use -kun with girls although it's a bit rare and outmoded. There are only specific times when it is appropriate to be used with girls. Shinji and Rei up until very recently, had a strictly business relationship, and using -kun indicates someone of equal or lesser status, regardless of gender. Its somewhat natural that Shinji use that honorific at that point. He changes to -san mostly because he's unsure of what to make of her, and -chan is far too informal at this juncture (at least for now lol).
Thanks for all your reviews and support, I appreciate it very much. I hope to finish chapter four sometime within the next week for New Years. Look forward to: Finding jobs, finding secrets (Yeah, Kaji!) awkward moments, happy moments, and lots more in Chapter Four (The title is borrowed) The Sun Also Rises.
So if I don't get it out by the holidays, on behalf of the Kazuhiko residence: Kurisumasu Omedeto gozaimasu!
-Kazuhiko Kazuki