The Tie That Binds
S/W, A/B(flashback), S/A, W/A/S, A(us)/D

What if Spike always had a soul but had fought it all those years and it took Angel losing his for Spike to realize it? Set shortly after the Judge.

Chapter One: Family
"I loved her. For 150 years she was my dark princess, my Ripe Wicked Plum. And now?!" Spike stopped as her screams of ecstasy filled the mansion. "Now I hate her with all my being. She never loved me. Never really liked me for anything more than a nurse and a good screw. And I get to hear her and my poncey sire doing all sorts of unmentionable things to one another all bleeding daylong. 'Snot fair! Wish I had Angel back. At least he found it in him to think about me from time to time. May have been a poof but I liked him better!" Spike screamed the last words. He sat in his wheelchair and drank some more whiskey while he waited for the minions to leave. They all ignored his ramblings anymore, unsure if he meant them or not. Spike had always been strange to them. He felt things that they weren't supposed to feel and lately, even before he'd lost the use of his legs, he'd stopped hunting. They had all assumed he was too worried about Dru but now they wondered.
Spike wondered too. He wondered why he no longer felt anything but loathing for his former lover and when had it started. He tried to tell himself it was after the incident with the Judge but he knew that wasn't true. The Judge had been his last attempt to rekindle what they'd had; no it had been before that. But Spike wasn't sure when. He also wondered why the stayed here playing crippled for Angelus and Drusilla. Then he remembered, 2 very powerful, insane masters vs. one non-hunting master. Not good odds.
Night fell and the minions left to hunt. Angelus and Dru came out to play. They were barely clothed at all. Spike looked at Angelus and remembered the early years when the three of them had been lovers. He knew that was why Angel had kept him alive but now Angelus would look at him with disgust. They too left and Spike was left alone.
"Don't worry Spikey. Mummy will bring you a prezzie," were Dru's only words to him that night. She saw herself only as his mummy now. Spike had killed his mother- twice. But that was before. The very thought of killing disgusted him now. It had for several months now but Spike continued as if everything were as it was. But something was very wrong.
Spike waited till everyone was out of the mansion the he too left to hunt. But Spike was hunting a different kind of prey.
Spike rolled around in the wheelchair until he got near a small mausoleum in the cemetery. He'd been coming here for weeks now to strengthen his legs. As soon as he was fully able, Spike would be gone.
"Bloody pillock. Son of a- my bleeding Sire. Poof. I'll show him." Spike groaned and mumbled as he rose to his feet and took those first small steps that would lead to more painful ones. "Knowing they're shagging is one thing but having to hear it and see it all day and all bloody night is a whole bloody other thing."
Spike pulled a flask of whiskey out of his duster and took a swig. He spun around to start his painful second lap of this little section of the graveyard when he saw them through a small copse of trees. There they were, the object of his sire's obsession, the object of his own, an the annoying one. Actually, the boy wasn't so bad but Spike felt a certain surge of jealousy fill him each time he saw the way the slayer and her witch friend would look at him. They loved him. Sure it wasn't in the romantic way but it was more love than they'd ever give him, than she'd ever give him. Her red hair glistened in the moonlight. She was hyper- probably a latte. Spike smiled. Her lips probably still tasted of the bittersweet liquid.
"You're a ponce, Spike. She's mortal and one of the Slayer's pals. You don't stand a chance. Maybe if I do something to get in the Slayer's good graces..." Spike let his mind wander as he watched the small group stake a few fledges. She danced in front of his eyes and his soul reached out to touch her. "Wait a bloody second. When did I get all soulful? Oh Bloody 'ell."