CHAPTER 9

I was surprised the next day, when opening the door Haku was standing in front of it.

I instinctively blushed and looked at the floor.

"mm… hi." I said embarrassed.

"Yubaba wants to see you." he uttered coldly.

I raised my eyes. His face was so pale, he didn't look like he had slept that night.

"something's wrong?" I asked worriedly.

He just shrugged and started walking away.

"Haku." I called him.

"follow me, I'll bring you to her office."

I did as he suggested, running a little to catch up with him, took one of his wrist.

"was what I did yesterday so wrong?" I whispered while he froze at the touch.

He didn't turn to me.

"Please… just leave me alone."

"what if I don't want to?" I replied boldly, even though deep inside me my heart was sinking in shame.

"Why do you care so much?" he asked, his cold eyes finally piercing mine.

"why do you push me away?"

"it's safer… for everyone."

I slapped him. Too late I realized how crazy I was acting.

"I'm sick and tired of this excuse… it won't do anymore… I'm not giving up, I want to stay here and stay with you… if you really want me to leave you alone you'd have to kill me."

"why are you so careless?"

He was angry.

"I thought it was clear already… there's just one thing I care in this world… in any world… and I'm trying hard not to lose it… that's why I'm acting like I am."

For a long time, we just stared at each other. I thought I saw his cheeks redden, but I couldn't be sure. His eyes were so cold, even though they were widened in shock as he processed what I said.

"that's just childish." he commented.

"how can you say this." I snapped.

"you should have something else… something more important to care about."

"you think I wouldn't like to have something else? But it can't be… I can't change what I feel, and neither I want to."

He sighed.

"let's just go… Yubaba's waiting for us."

"is pushing me away the only thing you're able to do?" I continued angrily.

"do you think it's fun for me?"

"then, why?"

"I told you thousands of times…"

"you're telling me you're just some random coward who can't even try to date a girl because he's too scared of getting hurt?"

His eyes widened again, he shifted his weight.

"I've already been hurt." he confessed. His voice so low.

I blinked a couple of times.

"d-did you go out… with someone?"

He rolled his eyes.

"it's you. It's just you."

I frowned.

"but I'm here now Haku… we could try."

His eyes moved, as in search of something, they landed on me, then on the floor. My hand let go to his wrist to reach for his hand.

I stepped closer.

A yelp made us turn around.

"you guys, what are you doing here?" said a blushing Rin.

She walked closer to get my hand and pulled me away from Haku.

"Yubaba's waiting for you."

"I know, but…" I tried to say.

"no buts… you just go!" she finished , forcing me out the door.

Haku just silently followed us.

In two more minutes I was standing in the back of Yubaba's office, while Haku watched from behind leaning on the frame of the door.

"shitsurei shimasu…" I stammered embarrassed. The figure on the chair was nothing like what I remembered. It was a far more older lady, half of his wrinkled face was covered with a black gown, there was something gloomy on her, and scary.

"welcome back, Chihiro." she said sort of smiling.

"thanks." I replied not really sure about what I was doing here.

"it's so strange for humans to come here, you know. I didn't expect you to ever come back."
"well, I didn't plan on it, either. Even though I wanted too."

"and how's that? You wanted to see your little friends again?"

"yeah, sort of." I responded quite confused. Was she making fun of me?

"please sit down. I surely don't want to keep you standing."

I knew for sure Haku's eyes were firm on my back, controlling my every movement.

Yubaba smirked.

"I was told you want to stay here… permanently." she continued, while I was sitting on the armchair in front of her.

"yeah, I would like that."

"you don't need you mum and dad anymore?"

I nodded.

"you want so much to stay with your childhood friend Haku, don't you? It's such a sweet thing from you."

"I do."

"you're willing to do another contract with me?" she asked. Haku moved quite quickly, catching my attention, he was firmly looking into the witch's eyes.

"You promised…" he started, but she held up one wrinkled hand to stop him.

"I know… I want to know what she wants first." she explained.

"I would like to work here… freely… with my name… I'll work hard." I said trying to sound confident.

Yubaba shook his head.

"do you think I can accept you like this? With nothing in exchange?"

Haku took another step forward. The witch glared at him.

"well, your friend here wants to keep you under his protective wing, and I'll compel to his wish… he has been working so good for me in these years… so I guess I'll let you stay… you can help Rin with her work."

I smiled incredulous. It was far more easier than I thought.

"but I hope you'll try to convince him to give in at my last request."

I looked at Haku.

"what is it?"

"I'm trying to convince him to marry… a powerful witch in the north is asking to unite the powers with him."

I paled. Marriage?

"I believe he's quite young."

"he is… and he's always so useful indeed… but she promised me he could keep working here."

"I have no intentions to accept the proposal." Haku said forcefully.

"oh poor Haku… we all know where your heart belongs… but you're a spirit, a quite powerful one, you can't just have a relationship with a simple human… you'd destroy her mind."
I stood up angrily, but I couldn't talk, I really didn't know what to say.

She smirked, and I thought I saw her eyes beaming.

"I believe you have no idea of what Haku did in this years, have you?"

"I don't." I replied as coldly as I could.

"his missions were very dangerous… he came back always victorious though… and bringing back with him the head of the rivals, too."

I gulped in shock, but tried as much as I could to not think about what she was saying.

"he flooded a village six months ago, to take back at a landlord who was acting quite suspiciously. And he indeed was right.."

"a v-village?" I asked trembling.

"and you remember my sister, don't you? He won on her too… and was able to get back her house…"

"did she die?" I demanded stepping forward.

"yes, of course."

I turned to Haku, his eyes were looking at nothing, empty nothing in front of him.

And I couldn't help, tears started to flow.

I felt all the pain he caused, and all the pain he felt in that moment, while I was realizing all he did, with a full blow to my heart.

"I'm sure everything's okay." I said finally and turned to the door.

"so, you're sure you want to stay?" she asked, his voice was sarcastic.

"I'm sure." I said feigning confidence. And I left the room.

I wasn't abandoning him, I wasn't.

Please review if you read through this.

Thank you for all the ones that reviewed till now. Hope now the story is a little clearer. And also thanks for the constructive criticism, it's really useful, so I can make this fic better.

I don't own any Spirited Away' characters.