Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VIII...
Author's Note: Hey everyone! Okay, so I almost met my goal of updating every two weeks. Here's a little hint, though. Reviews always inspire me to write faster, lol. Anyway, Winter Break has officially started for me, which will hopefully result in a lot of writing. Happy holidays everyone!
To Love You More
Chapter Thirty
"Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide..."
-"Collide" Howie Day
QUISTIS shielded her eyes from the blinding sun as she exited the hotel she was staying in. The past week in FH had brought her much needed peace of mind. The quiet town offered endless time for reflection and contemplation of her future. She still had not reached a decision about what, exactly, she would do upon returning to Garden, but she figured that she still had time to think about that.
Wearing a white, sleeveless sundress, Quistis decided to head to the pier. Nothing was more relaxing than sitting on the docks and watching the ocean. In the past week, she had found that the ocean had been her closest companion. It was funny, she had spent most of her life in the harbor town of Balamb, yet she had never enjoyed the ocean like she had in the past week in FH.
As she arrived at the pier, a fisherman at the end of the docks caught her eye. His back was turned towards her, but she felt a strange connection to him. From where she was standing, she could see that he had blonde hair, sparkling in the sun. As she moved closer, he suddenly turned around, causing her to gasp in shock. Her blue eyes looked upon amused green ones. Eyes that she would never forget.
"Hello, Instructor," he drawled, his trademark smirk playing about his lips. "Long time no see."
"Seifer," Quistis said as calmly as possible. "Yes, it has been a long time."
"You're looking great," he said, flashing that smirk again.
"Thank you," Quistis said politely. "You don't look so bad yourself." Was that ever an understatement! The years had been more than kind to Seifer. He was more muscular now, more built, and very tan. Stubble dotted his jaw line, giving him a rugged, sexy look. Quistis couldn't help but stare.
Seifer laughed. "Well, are you going to tell me why you're in town? This doesn't have anything to with Commander Puberty, does it?"
"His name is Squall," she corrected him irritably. "And you can call me Quistis. I stopped being your instructor a long time ago."
"Okay, then, Quistis. Would you care to answer my question?"
Quistis sighed. "The answer is yes. My being here has everything to do with Squall."
"Of course it does. I shouldn't have even asked. After all these years, nothing's changed. Let me guess. Squall's still ordering everyone around back at Garden, especially you, while he follows Rinoa around like a dog. Am I right?"
Quistis stared at him in shocked silence. "Have you been living under a rock?"
"Don't speak in riddles, Instructor. I'm just a lowly fisherman now. We like to speak plain and simple."
"So you really don't know, then."
"Know what, Instructor?" Seifer asked through gritted teeth.
"That's Quistis," she reminded him. "There's so much to tell you that I don't even know where to begin."
Seifer sighed. "You know what? You're lucky that I've been catching a lot of fish lately. I know a place where we can talk. Come with me."
Quistis hesitated. Could she trust him? Years ago, he had betrayed them all. Back then, though, he had been possessed. He had been a completely different person. It was Seifer the fisherman now. That was why, a moment later, she was sprinting to catch up with her former student.
RINOA capped her tube of red lipstick and took a final look into the mirror. Irvine would be arriving any moment to go on another one of his "surprises". She had no idea what he had in store for her. All he had told her was to get dressed up. Taking his word for it, she had chosen to wear a long, strapless, black dress. It was made from rustling satin, which formed a swooping skirt at the waistline. Rinoa's hair was down, and she wore simple makeup. The only jewelry that adorned her features were a string of pearls around her neck, and small pearl earrings to match.
Just as Rinoa had anticipated, there was a knock on the door. Carefully balancing herself in her black sandals, she walked over to the door. Opening it revealed Irvine, looking dashing in a black tuxedo.
"Wow," he said, upon seeing his girlfriend. "You look beautiful."
"Thank you," Rinoa said. "You don't look so bad yourself."
He extended his hand to her. "Ready to get going?"
Rinoa nodded, taking his hand. "So, do you wanna tell me where you're taking me?"
"Now what would be the fun in that?" Irvine said, smiling mischievously.
"Why do I even bother asking anymore? I should have learned by now that I can never get any answers out of you."
The cowboy laughed. "Ain't that the truth."
As the two stepped outside, Rinoa was shocked to see a limousine parked by the curb.
"That's not for us, is it?" she questioned bewilderingly.
Irvine grinned at the expression on her face. "Now, who else would it be for?"
Rinoa looked at him in surprise. "You rented a limo? Wow...I can't wait to see where we're actually going."
"You'll see," he said as he opened the door for her. "After you."
Rinoa stepped into the limo, followed by Irvine. A moment later, the driver took off to their "secret" destination. Rinoa felt butterflies in her stomach. It was odd, she usually didn't get nervous about such things. However, something felt different about tonight. She couldn't put her finger on it, but something had definitely changed.
"We're almost there," Irvine told her as he reached for her hand.
Minutes later, the limo pulled up to an elaborate looking restaurant. From inside the limo, the view wasn't very clear, but Rinoa was fairly certain that she had never been to this area before. As she stepped out of the limo, she saw that the restaurant was named "Vivere" and was situated right next to the harbor. Rinoa turned to Irvine, confused.
"This is going to sound really stupid, but where are we?"
Irvine chuckled. "This restaurant opened about two years ago. We're actually directly opposite from the Balamb docks right now. This whole section of town was completely renovated, and this here restaurant has become a really popular spot in Balamb. So, are you ready to see what all the hype is about?"
Rinoa nodded, and the two of them walked into the restaurant together. The sorceress felt her eyes widen at the scene before her. First of all, the place was huge. A grand staircase was located in the center of the room, which led up to the second floor dining room. The whole restaurant was decorated in rich shades of red, from the velvet drapes, to the elegant table clothes. As Rinoa was taking all of this in, an elegantly dressed waiter approached them.
"May I help you?" the waiter asked.
Irvine nodded. "I have a reservation for two under the name Kinneas."
The waiter scanned the list he was holding, and then nodded. "Very well. Follow me."
The waiter, whose nametag read "Vick", led them over to a table by the window, overlooking the harbor. He handed them the menus, told them to call him if they needed anything, and promptly left.
Rinoa quietly studied the menu, noting how expensive everything was. The prices were outrageous! She searched for the cheapest item on the menu, but even that was outlandishly priced.
"Do you know what you're getting?" Rinoa asked Irvine.
"The special sounds good," Irvine told her. "How about you?"
She shrugged. "The same, I guess. I trust you know what's good here."
"Actually, I've only been here once before, for a business meeting. Two specials, then, I guess? I've heard that everything here is good, so I don't think we can go wrong."
"Okay, sounds good."
A few minutes later, Vick came back over and Irvine placed the orders. As soon as Vick walked away, the cowboy turned to Rinoa, amusement in his eyes.
"You know, they have a great dance floor upstairs, complete with a live orchestra. What do you say? You wanna give it a go?"
Rinoa smiled. "I'd love to."
Irvine led her up the amazing staircase and straight to the dance floor. The orchestra was playing a slow jazz song. They immediately fell into the rhythm of the music. Rinoa felt herself pulling Irvine closer, and then resting her head on his chest. She loved the way his arms encircled her, making her feel safe and protected. She let the music envelop her, allowing her body to sway softly to the beat.
"Rinoa?" Irvine whispered softly.
"Mhmm," she murmured, eyes closed, enjoying the tranquility the dance washed upon her.
"I love you."
Rinoa smiled. "I love you, too, Squall."
"AND that, in a nutshell, is why I'm here," Quistis told Seifer. She had just spent the better part of an hour sitting in a small café, pouring her heart out to Seifer. Wow, her life had really gotten screwed up. Surprisingly, though, Seifer had been a great listener, keeping the sarcastic comments to a minimum.
"Well, I could have predicted half of that crap if you had asked me. I could have told you that Commander Puberty would never get over his little girlfriend. Maybe, if anyone had asked for my advice, you wouldn't be in this situation right now. No one seemed to bother to invite me, though."
Quistis sighed. So much for being understanding. "I'm sorry that you weren't invited to the wedding, but, well...you and Squall don't particularly get along very well. As for Squall never getting over Rinoa, how do you know that's the reason why he wanted the break? He married me, didn't he?"
"You're only kidding yourself if you believe that Squall doesn't still love Rinoa. Or she him, for that matter. In fact, I bet that they're screwing each other's brains out as we speak."
"Seifer!" Quistis exclaimed, outraged that he would say such a thing.
"What?" he answered casually. "It's only a matter of time before it happens."
Quistis grabbed her purse and quickly stood up. "You know what, Seifer? I was a fool to actually think that you'd care. I don't know why I even bothered to talk to you."
"Aw, come on, Instructor. I was just kidding around," he told her defensively.
"Obviously, you haven't changed a bit from the sorry prick you were four years ago! Goodbye, Seifer!"
"Instructor, wait!" he exclaimed, grabbing her arm.
"For the hundredth time, it's Quistis! And let go of my arm, Seifer!"
"I'm sorry, Quistis, but I can't do that."
"And why the hell not?" she demanded, annoyed beyond belief.
"Because we're not through here. I'm sorry for what I said, okay? Just sit back down. I'm in no rush to get back to fishing."
"How do you know that I don't have somewhere to be?"
"You're on vacation in a small fishing town. I highly doubt that you have an appointment with anyone."
Quistis sighed and sat back down in the chair. "I can't believe that I'm listening to you, of all people."
"What's your alternative?" he questioned. "It doesn't look like Commander Puberty turned out much better."
"Seifer," she warned.
"Can I ask you an honest question, Quistis? Why the hell do you keep defending him?"
"He's my husband, Seifer."
"You say that as if it explains everything."
"Doesn't it?"
Seifer shook his head. "Not to me."
"Well, maybe when you're married someday, you'll understand what I mean when I say that."
He shrugged. "You're forgetting that I'm just an old fisherman."
"I don't think either of us believes that, Seifer."
"What do you believe, then?" he questioned.
"To be completely honest, I don't really believe in anything anymore."
"What happened to you?" he asked suddenly, his voice completely serious.
Quistis sat there uncomfortably, not sure what he meant by that question, or what kind of answer he was looking for. She decided to change the subject, instead. "You haven't told me anything about your life here. Where are Raijin and Fujin?"
Seifer knew she was avoiding his question, but decided to let it go...for now. "They're on vacation in Winhill, actually. They've been dating for awhile, and decided that a change of scenery could do them some good. Raijin's a fisherman now, like me, and believe it or not, Fujin actually owns this café."
Quistis raised her eyebrows in surprise. She had never really seen Fujin as that type. I guess people change. "So, all you do around here is...fish?"
"Pretty much. It's how we earn a living, and when the fish doesn't sell, well, it's always dinner on the table."
"Yes," Quistis said, "But don't you ever get sick of doing the same thing all the time?"
"Sometimes, I guess. It sure as hell beats being Ultimecia's puppet, though," he said, with a weak laugh. Quistis could tell that the bad memories still haunted him.
"Well, I had better get going. I don't want to keep you from your job any longer."
Seifer nodded. "Yeah, I guess I should get back out there. You staying at the Breezy Hotel?"
"Yes. Isn't it the only hotel in town?"
"Yeah," he said. "Just testing you. So, are you going to give me your room number, or what?"
"Excuse me?"
"Your room number. So I'll know where to find you. Unless you want to ignore me the rest of the time you're here."
"No," she said hesitantly. "It's room number two-twenty."
"Two-twenty," he said, smirking. "I won't forget it."
"WHAT?" Irvine asked in disbelief, pulling away from Rinoa.
Rinoa froze. She hadn't just said that, had she? From the look on Irvine's face, she obviously had. "Irvine, I...don't know why I said that."
Irvine shook his head. "You had to have had a reason. You don't just say you love someone if you don't mean it."
She mentally cringed. Irvine was right, you didn't. Tears welled up in her eyes. For months, she had hid her feelings, buried them so deep that they had almost disappeared. Almost. She had tried so hard to convince herself that she was in love with Irvine. Why couldn't she just love him? He had always been so wonderful to her. Now, he was looking at her with such hurt, that she couldn't even bring herself to say anything. She simply stood there, tears silently falling down her face.
"Do you love me, Rinoa?" he demanded.
Rinoa shook her head sadly. "No," she whispered. "I'm so sorry, Irvine, but I don't love you."
Irvine just stood there, looking crushed. Everyone at the restaurant was now staring at the couple. The tension in the room was so thick that it felt as if one could slice it with a knife.
Rinoa couldn't take it anymore. All of this pain was her fault. She was the one who had to be so damn weak. She was the one who had screwed everything up.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, and then turned around and ran. Down the stairs, she ran, right through the restaurant, and the stares of the diners. As soon as she flew through the door, she was hit with a blast of cold water. She cursed her horrible luck, as it was now pouring, and the limo from earlier was nowhere to be seen.
Her mind was racing. Where could she go? She didn't even know how to get back to Balamb Garden from this part of town. Screw this rain, she suddenly decided. She had no choice but to walk. Anything was better than going back into the restaurant and seeing the pain in his eyes. I'm a coward. All of the shops surrounding the area had already closed for the night, so it wasn't like she could ask someone for directions. She decided to take a street to her right, and began sprinting down the path, which wasn't exactly easy, considering the shoes she was wearing. I'm so stupid. Quistis wouldn't have acted this way. She would have stayed at the restaurant and discussed things maturely.
At that point, she was completely lost. It didn't help that it was dark and pouring. She was soaked and miserable, and all she wanted to do was curl up under her sheets and bawl her eyes out. Suddenly noticing a shop with a small canopy above it, she quickly ducked under it, struggling to catch her breath.
"Hey little lady," a voice called out. "What's a pretty little thing like yourself doing all alone in the rain?"
Rinoa looked up to see a tall man walking towards her. He looked to be a little older than her, with black hair and black eyes. Rinoa shivered, partly from the cold, and partly from fear. "What do you want?"
"Tsk, tsk, that isn't any way to be talking to someone who's only here to help."
Rinoa backed away slowly. "Stay the hell away from me!"
"I'm not going to hurt you," he said soothingly. "I only want to...have a little fun." He had Rinoa backed into a corner now. Reaching out to stroke her face, he said, "Such a pretty girl. Why do you look so sad?"
"Because I..." She trailed off, inwardly smiling. Quick as could be, she kicked him in the groin, digging her heel where it would be the most painful.
"Argh!" he cried out, stooping in pain. "Son of a bitch!"
Rinoa had already fled in the opposite direction. She had no idea where she was going, only knowing that she had to get as far away from that man as possible. She suddenly crashed into something hard, and gasped.
"Relax," a voice said. "It's just me."
The sorceress let out a sigh of relief as she saw that it was Irvine. "Thank God it's you!" she exclaimed, flinging her arms around him.
"Hey, it's okay. The limo is waiting right around the corner for us." Irvine led a trembling Rinoa around the corner and into the limo. Once inside, he turned to her worriedly. "You okay?"
Rinoa nodded, taking a deep breath. "I'm so sorry, Irvine. I never wanted any of this to happen. I know that I'm a fool, and I'll understand if you never want to see my face again."
"Rinoa," he said, sighing, "I'm not mad at you."
"What?" she asked, sure that she had heard him wrong.
"I'm not mad at you, Rinoa. We had some good times, right? I'm just happy that I was able to distract you for awhile. Even if that's all I was."
Rinoa shook her head. "No, Irvine, you were more than that. You are more than that. You've been my rock throughout all of this. I can never repay you for that. I just...wish I could give you what you're looking for. I wish for that so bad, but I just can't change how I feel."
"Hey, it's okay. Am I disappointed? Of course. You're an amazing person, Rinoa. If all I can offer you is friendship, then so be it. I want you to know that I respect your feelings."
"Thank you," she said sincerely. "You don't know how much that means to me. You're the one who's amazing, Irvine." She rested her head on his shoulder as the limo made its way through the rain, back to Balamb Garden.