The Power of Hope

Chapter Eleven

By: Lily Handle

Author's Note: Man, long chapter. Longer than I expected it to be. I like it though. Definitely think it's one of the better chapters in this story. Best parts are the little first part and the last part, hands down. Please, enjoy this one. And I'd love feedback from you readers about it.

Hope woke feeling a strange sense of comfort. She snuggled deeper into the warmth surrounding her, ready to fall right back asleep. However when coarse hair brushed against her cheek, her eye shot open and she came awake in an instant. Logan. The warmth surrounding her was Logan. Oh boy, her body thought, but her mind was of another opinion. She couldn't believe she had thrown herself at him like that. He had come to comfort her and she'd tried to get him to sleep with her. He had been a gentleman, though, and held her through out the night. But, didn't he had a shirt on then? Curious she raised one hand and laid it against the hard planes of his abs. Mentally she drooled. The man was chiseled from granite, but he was so warm. Because he didn't stir at her touch she dared to brush her fingers up, towards his chest. She couldn't believe he had stayed the whole night, holding her because he had said he wouldn't go. No man she had ever met, who obviously desired her, would have turned down what she offered him last night, but he had. She did feel slightly embarrassed with herself, but not hurt at his refusal. He had just been looking out for her, making sure she didn't make a choice she could later regret. Oh God, I could fall in love with him, Hope realized suddenly. Maybe part of her already had.

"You gonna spend the whole mornin' thinkin' or are you gonna say somethin'?" Logan whispered in her ear. His voice was rough with sleep and something that sent a tingle down her spine.

"How's good mornin' sound?" She asked softly and then yelped as Logan rolled her on to her back. "Good lord, Logan, what's gotten into you?" She didn't need an answer after she looked into his eyes. They were wild, hot as they locked onto hers. Hope's breath stumbled in her chest. She knew that look, and understood perfectly what he was asking. What she had started last night was finally going to be finished. She managed a whispered please, before he was kissing her with such intensity she felt it burn her very bones. She returned his intensity, wanting to burn him like he burned her. Take more, he told her with his hands that moved over her with rough urgency, take all of me. Don't leave me, she begged with her body arching underneath him to press against him more fully, be there for me, please. No more waiting, Hope thought dizzily, no more of this damn hesitancy, and thank god for that.

"Doktor! Doktor Chandler! Time to wake up, you've got court in two hours!" Maverick's voice called through the door. Logan tore his lips away from her, and dropped his head to her shoulder. Hope closed her eyes and ran her hands up and down his arms.

"I am beginning to hate that man's timing," She whispered roughly, panting. Her heart was thundering, her body strung as tight as a guitar string, and her mind racing like the X-jet. Murphy's Law was at work here, Hope was damn sure of it. If she ever found this Murphy, she'd kill him for this one.

"Doctor? Do I have to come in there and wake you up myself?"

"No! No! I'm awake," She called, "You can go to breakfast, Maverick, I'll meet you there."

"Ah, guten morgen Doktor. Mr. Murdock will be here soon, he wants to brief you once more on how he'll be running your case before court."

"Get rid of him," Logan growled against her ear.

"Logan, we can't. Not now," She whispered back, though the idea of giving in to the hand that was slowly walking up her thigh was terribly appealing. The rough calluses of his fingers whispering passionate promises that were drugging.

"Doctor, and one more thing before I go. The Professor is looking for Logan, would you mind mentioning it to him?"

"How does he know?" She gasped, feeling a blush creep over her cheeks.

"The Viking's smarter than he looks," Logan mutter and rolled off of her. "Go get ready, Doc." Hope knew the part of her that was mentally calculating the time she had to spare was going to be ignored, so she pushed the strap of her nightgown that had been pushed off her shoulder back into the place and slipped out of bed.

Right before she ducked into the bathroom she looked over her shoulder, "Logan, what happened to your shirt?"

He opened one eye and looked her over from head to toe, "Someone kept pushing it up durin' the night, figured it was better to take it off then let it strangle me."

Logan waited until the shower kicked on before storming out of Hope's bedroom, looking for Ricko so he could kick his ass. He had barely gotten any sleep with Hope curled up against him all night. By morning he'd almost been drunk on her scent and heady with desire. And then she had started her little finger walking expedition, making him nearly delirious for her. Then that Viking son of a bitch had decided to play alarm clock. Logan was going to get him for this one.

Ricko was outside Hope's room, leaning against the opposite wall with a pleased grin on his face, "Ah, you enjoy your morning."

Logan stood toe to toe with him, but it did nothing to diminish the grin, "I'm gonna get you for this one, Ricko. You just wait. When you get back to court, I'm gonna clean your clock from here back to Germany."

"Since when haven't you, Gulo? And if kicking my ass will clear your head, then by all means, go right ahead. You've got to testify today, and if you act like some love sick teenager, McKenna will tear you to shreds."

"I can handle McKenna," Logan growled, "I don't need you watching my back about court."

"Uh huh, whatever you say, Colonel, but tomorrow, the woman you were just snuggling up to testifies. She's no where near ready for that, and I seriously doubt any amount of coaching will ever make her ready. She can't lean on you then, so right now is not the best time to have her…"

"Excuse me," Both men looked towards Murdock, who was standing in the middle of the hallway, "If I may interrupt for a moment."

"What do you want, horn head?" Logan snapped.

"I think you're both over looking the fact that Dr. Chandler survived a traumatizing event that would have broken most people. In the right situation a core strength appears in Dr. Chandler, and as along as she can still find that, there is hope for her."

Kitty sat alone in the computer room, manning every screen by herself because today was the day Logan had to testify. She was a little harried, but the challenge of rolling from computer to computer checking the searches or hacking firewalls or reading information. Her only entertainment was the tv, which was glued to the trial. She was nervous for Logan, though she was sure he could handle court, she still wanted to keep an eye on him. Of course, Colonel Fury was testifying first today. Kitty wrinkled her nose at the computer screen, the search was blinking like it found something, but nothing was showing up. Weird, she thought, and weird meant time for her to find out why. While her fingers danced over the keyboard, she listened with one ear to Fury talking about the investigation into Trask's kidnapping of Dr. Hope, and how he felt that Trask was certainly a threat. Kitty skimmed the search's information log, slowly looking over all the data it had been through. It stalled, Kitty mused, when searching through the records on procedure when carrying out warrants.

What did warrants have to do with the search? she wondered, tucking her tongue in her cheek. Her only choice was to go manual. A little thrill raced up her spin at the idea. There was a trigger here, she felt it in her bones. A trigger that if anything was searching for a certain word, the word being doctor, stalled the search. Why would there be a trigger in procedures? And why for the word doctor? In the background, the court room gasped when Fury said that Dr. Chandler was not responsible for her actions and that she acted out of self-defense. Well duh, Kitty rolled her eyes. People were so stupid sometimes. Okay, Kitty typed speedily, racing against the trigger to search the document. What she found, caused her to gasp.

"No way!"

"I have no further questions for this witness, your honor," Murdock said, smiling triumphantly at Logan. He'd done perfectly, Hope could tell by the way Murdock looked and the way McKenna was grinding his teeth together. She couldn't help but feel a little happy. She should have trusted Murdock when he said that watching the prosecution's case would beat her down emotionally, and that she'd feel like she had no hope at all. Maybe, just maybe, she had a chance here.

"Mr. Logan," McKenna said, rising from his seat and squaring off with Logan, who looked strong and capable. "Before joining S.H.I.E.L.D. in this investigation, you worked at the Xavier Institute, correct?"

"Yeah."

"What do you do at the Institute?"

"I'm an instructor."

"How long have you been an instructor there?"

"A few years."

"And during this time, were you still working with S.H.I.E.L.D.?"

Logan smiled slowly, "Sorry, I can't answer that question."

McKenna blinked in surprise, "Why not?"

"That information is classified." A murmur spread through the courtroom and Hope blinked in surprise. The judge however, knew exactly what to do.

"Colonel Fury," The judge called over the crowd, "Is what this man says true?"

Fury stood up from his seat in the gallery, "Yes, your honor, S.H.I.E.L.D. has classified that information."

"Well, Mr. McKenna, you're going to have to move on." McKenna took a deep breath and straightened his shoulders.

"Mr. Logan, you were pretty seriously involved in this case, correct?"

"If you aren't seriously involved, the case isn't going to go anywhere," Logan said easily.

McKenna chuckled, but it sounded forced, "Of course, but would you say your involvement was more than the average agent?"

Logan met McKenna's glare, "I was one of the lead agents, so yeah."

"In fact, you were so involved that when the investigation wasn't moving fast enough for your liking you left, isn't that true?"

"No sir," Logan said smoothly, "Colonel Fury sent me out into the field."

McKenna raised his eyebrows, "Mr. Logan, do you know that there is a document in S.H.I.E.L.D.'s official records that states you left the investigation, but there's not a single mention of Colonel Fury sending you out into the field."

"At the time Colonel Fury and I believed information on S.H.I.E.L.D.'s investigation was being given to Mr. Trask and his associates, to make sure we didn't tip Trask that we planned on sending myself into the field, we agreed that it should appear like I left the investigation."

"A clever story, Mr. Logan, can anyone back that statement up?"

"Colonel Fury."

"Anyone besides the Colonel?"

"No sir, not that I know of."

"So, it's possible Colonel Fury and you concocted this whole story up isn't it?"

"No sir," Logan shrugged, "What purpose would we have in lying?"

"Well, both you and the Colonel seem intent of protecting Dr. Chandler," This time McKenna smiled slowly, "By any means necessary. I have no further questions for this witness, your honor."

Hope drummed her fingers on the armrest of her chair. Clouds hovered effortlessly outside the little window she stared at. In the cabin of the Chandler Family jet, she and Maverick sat silently. His thoughts, Hope could only guess, but hers were simply on Logan. His testimony was surprising. Murdock had made him tell in detail the steps the S.H.I.E.L.D. investigation had gone through looking for her and what condition she had been in when finally rescued. Never once had he glanced towards her, or given any sign that this morning that had been two steps away from becoming lovers. He had handle McKenna well too. Never giving an inch, he had fought…for her. Her case didn't look so bleak anymore. And apparently, Logan's name was James, or at least that was the name he had given in court. Hope mentally wrinkled her nose, he didn't look like a James to her. He would always be Logan, just Logan.

"Doctor," Maverick said suddenly, "Would you mind a little friendly advice?"

"Advice?" Hope glanced at Maverick in confusion, "What sort of advice?"

Maverick gave a half smile, "About getting involved with a man like Logan."

Hope blushed and looked down at her hands, "Oh."

"For a man that's been around as long as Logan has, don't you find it odd he's never mentioned his past to you?"

"He just likes to keep somethings to himself," Hope muttered, "And it doesn't matter. We both have past relationships, we're both adults, we know what we're getting into."

"I can guarantee you've never had a relationship like Logan's had." Maverick sighed, and looked away from her, out a window across the cabin from him, "Back when we worked together, one of the members of our team was a woman. She was the only woman in the whole bunch and ol' Canucklehead got rather attached to her."

"So, they became lovers?" Hope could tell by the seriousness and sadness in Maverick's eyes that this story was not going to end happily. She knew there were moments when Logan got a look on his face similar to Maverick's and while she tried not to let it eat at her, she wanted to know what put that look on his face.

"Ja, it was serious for a long time."

"What happened to her?"

"She was killed." Hope gasped, "By another member of our team, while Logan wasn't there to protect her. He blames himself for her death, but what's worse is a lot of the women who get involved with Logan end up dead." Maverick shook his head, "His past is more horrible than you can imagine, a lot of people want him right back in that. To keep people safe, Logan doesn't get close. But when he does, he'd lay down his life to protect the people he cares for. It takes a lot of time for him to let someone get close, especially someone like you. He's worried about you getting hurt, and deep down, he's worried about getting hurt again himself. So, he's a little gruff with you sometimes and a little rude, but Lord knows how you did it, he's let you get close."

Maverick looked her straight in the eyes, holding her gaze with the intensity of his, "So, Doctor, I'm telling you all of this because Logan is my blustbruder, my blood brother, and you deserve to know just how big of a risk he's taking with this and how much trust he's putting in you."

Hope blinked for several seconds, unable to find the words, "I…I…don't know what to say."

"Just be careful with him, alright? He's more fragile than he looks."

"Thank you, Maverick."

Maverick smiled, "I think it's about time you started to call me David, Doctor."

Hope smiled back, "Well then David, you're going to have to call me Hope."

When the students stepped out into the Danger Room for their training session they did not expect to see Wolverine standing next to Maverick, who was wearing some sort of body armor. Instinctively the students grouped closer together, they recognized a threat when they saw one. The room was set up with obstacle courses, huge walls and the occasional pit. No one in the group could figure out what was going on or what Wolverine had in mind.

"Gotta treat for y'all today," Wolverine called, "We're gonna play a game of tag."

Maverick leaned down to whisper in Wolverine's ear, "Just what are you planning, blustbruder?"

"Your target is my good buddy Maverick here," Wolverine slapped a little target sticker on the middle of Maverick's chest, "Your objective is to hit this target as many times as you can. Maverick's objective here is to stop you by placing these X's on your back. If he does, you come find me, and wait until someone tags old Viking here, or everyone's X'ed."

"You've lost your mind, Canucklehead," Maverick gapped. There was a moment of silence and then the students burst out laughing. While the students enjoyed the new, not so tough nickname Wolverine just grinned.

"Oh, and Ricko, you can't use your powers," He said quietly.

Maverick glanced down at Wolverine, "This is for this morning isn't it?"

"I warned ya, didn't I? Alright, let's give the Viking here a head start, and then get to work." Maverick glanced once more at Wolverine, "You waitin' for an invitation?"

"Ich werde du nicht dadurch," Maverick whispered, before taking off at a jog and disappearing behind a collection of pillars. Wolverine gave him a minute before he let the students start looking. Of course the majority of them would never lay a hand on Maverick. Mostly this was just to keep him from pounding the man. And it was entertaining to watch the students shuffle back one by one, X's in various locations.

"Mr. Logan! Mr. Logan!" Kitty called as she burst through the door, "I found something!"

"What?"

"Jeeze, you took forever to get back, you know that?" Kitty rolled her eyes, "I thought I'd never get a chance to talk to you. And since I saw you weren't like involved with this training session, I figured it was okay to come in and like tell you."

"Tell me what, Kitty?"

"Okay, so I was just sitting around monitoring the searches today, you know, like you told me to. And well, nothing interesting was really happening, everything was smooth sailing, but then one of the searches stalled on a trigger. A trigger, that's where if you're searching for a certain word the trigger word will stall the search and then hide the information on you. Okay, so one of the searches hit one right? I started digging around and I found out that…"

"So, someone sent an anonymous letter to McKenna and Holtzhour about issuing an arrest warrant for Dr. Chandler, and it gave them all the necessary information to make a case," Logan said to Fury over the phone in Charles's office.

"Did she find where the email came from?"

"She says from one of those free online places, and all the information given is fake. She found out where the email originated from, a cyber café in Paris."

"Paris? Who in Paris wants to see Dr. Chandler behind bars?"

The Institute, for all its grandeur and magnificence always took on an eerie quality at night. The hallways and rooms filled with shadows, leaving plenty of places for the imagination to conjure monsters out of. Walking these hallways had become an almost nightly ritual for Hope. She had started because she could no long concentrate on her work long enough to exhaust her mind to the point where she could sleep. The nights were she didn't prowl the Institute's hallways usually were the nights she woke up in the sweat, the lingering images of a nightmare driving her from bed to go read or stare out a window. So, to give herself some sort of outlet for her nervous energy she had started roaming the halls like a specter. Originally she had stuck to the main house, weaving her way down hallways and through rooms. She quickly discovered the shadows bothered her, her imagination being slightly over active and the shadows were a perfect channel for it. Instead she now wandered the hallways the snaked under the Institute. The lights were always on down there, even at night, just incase the alarm went off and the X-men would have to rush off to protect the people who hated them.

Wrapped in a bathrobe Hope watched her feet as she walked and decided the first thing she'd do if she won in court was go to a spa. A European spa, where she'd pamper herself for a week, no two weeks, she decided. She'd get a manicure and a pedicure and her hair done. She'd find the hottest, studly-est, manly-est masseuse in the whole place and get a full body massage. Hope chuckled at the idea, but the chuckle ended in a sigh. It wasn't a good idea to start weaving fantasies about what she'd do with her newly won freedom. No one on the jury believed her claim of innocence. They just saw exactly what McKenna wanted them to see. A pair of big hairy feet. What the he…WHAM! Hope stumbled back, but two hands on her arms held her steady.

She looked up, "Logan?"

"Hey Doc, what are doing up so late?" Logan didn't release her arms, instead he pulled her close so his hands could rest on her hips.

"Walking off some insomnia," She managed to answer. The man was dripping wet, from head to toe and currently only wearing a towel slung precariously around his hips. "What are you doing?"

"Working out," He smiled, "Just got out of the shower."

"Oh." She didn't need him to tell her that. Close as she was to him she could smell the steam, and the soap he used. He seemed to radiate more heat that usual and the towel was a dead give away. Hope was suddenly overcome by a wave of sadness so deep she could feel tears welling in her eyes. If she went to prison she'd never have a moment like this again. She'd never have dinner with the students, listening to six different conversations at once. She'd never share morning coffee with Ororo and the Professor. She'd never have discussion on the latest theories on mutant biology with Hank. The only time she could talk with her family was through a phone with bullet proof glass and guards between them. And she'd never have a chance to wake up in Logan's arm ever again.

"I don't want to go to prison," She said, "I can't."

"Doc, no one here's gonna let that happen," Logan soothed, "We're gonna take care of you."

"I know, I know," Hope shook her head and pushed her fears back, "Sometimes it just catches me off guard and overwhelms me." Hope took a step closer to Logan and leaned into him. She liked how his arms tightened around her. She wished she had the nerve to ask him to come to bed with her. She was sure he could make her sleep, but she was afraid again.

"Is your name really James?" She asked instead.

"I don't know," He answered against her hair.

Hope frowned, "I don't understand, how can you not know?"

"I'm a hundred years old, maybe more. Somewhere over the years I managed to get amnesia, I don't really remember anything before World War Two. I was called Logan then, so I stuck with it." Hope remembered the first time that had met,

"This is Logan."

"Just Logan?"

"Yeah."

"It's a Celtic or Gaelic name," Hope muttered, an almost forgotten bit of information popping into her mind "It means small cove or little hollow."

"How do you know that?"

"My mama likes names," Hope chuckled, "She has a whole shelf in the library full of baby name books. One summer I sat down with one and started reading."

"And you remember Logan out of hundreds of names?"

"I have a distant Uncle Logan in Minnesota somewhere," Hope explained, "Though he's about fifty-three now, over weight and probably couldn't fit in a small cove anymore. I looked up all the names in my family, well as many as I could in one afternoon. I got bored with it pretty quickly."

"You like having a big family?" Logan asked and Hope clearly heard the wistful note in the question.

"Sometimes. I have relatives who I don't really know how I'm related to them. And on occasion someone people will approach my father saying their his child and try to blackmail him out of a couple of thousand dollars. Papa calls the police because he and my Mama have been sweethearts since high school, so," Hope shrugged, "I wouldn't trade them for the world, for anything." Silence fell between them, where Logan just casually stroked her back and she leaned into him, but Hope still had a few questions.

"Have you ever seen a specialist for your amnesia?"

"Not a big fan of doctors, Doc."

"I noticed that, but still," She pulled back to look up at him, "Retrograde amnesia can be recovered from."

"Retrograde?" Logan raised an eyebrow at her.

"Retrograde amnesia is where the amnesiac can't remember events before or the event itself that gave them amnesia. To me, it sounds like that's what you have. You've said you can remember parts of your past, you're already on the way to recovering it. An expert could help you with that."

"I know what caused my amnesia Doc," Logan said softly, looking away from her. Hope blinked, she'd never heard of an amnesiac who could remember the event, but not all of their past. Could he have a different type of amnesia then? It could be hysterical amnesia, but that was temporary, usually the amnesiac recovered within months or years of the event with the proper psychological treatment. But Logan had said he'd never seen a doctor for it, so possibly…

"Stop trying to diagnose me, Doc," Logan sighed, "I can't see a doctor because I can't really explain to them what happened."

"Try me," Hope said, reaching a hand up and soothing the creases between his eyes, "I've heard some interesting stories."

"Nothing like this, Doc," Logan leaned down a kissed her forehead, "Thanks, but maybe I'll tell you when you've got less on your mind."

Hope frowned at him, "Logan, I…"

"Doc," Logan cut her off, "I promise, I'll tell you about it one day, but right now you don't need to be worrying about me. Kitty found something interesting today, someone emailed McKenna and Holtzhour outlining a warrant for your arrest and trial. The squirt's lookin' into who sent it, but she hasn't found anything yet. If someone behind the scenes is pulling the strings on this, it could give Fury a way to get your case back under S.H.I.E.L.D review."

"Or it could mean people higher up than Fury want me in prison and there's nothing that can be done," Hope sighed and laid her cheek back against Logan's chest. "How far do you think I could run before the government caught up with me?"

"Not far enough," Logan nudged her away from him, "Come on, Doc, it's late and you've got a big day tomorrow. Let's get you up to bed." She let Logan lead her out of the hallway and back upstairs to her room. At the door he kissed her gently and nudged her inside.

"Will you be there tomorrow?" She couldn't help back ask before he could close the door between them.

"I will, Hope."

Author's Note: What Maverick says to Logan is "I will get you for this." Incase you couldn't figure it out. And I know, I'm evil to end the chapter before Hope's testimony, but that'll be a long part and it needs it's own chapter really. It'll be good, horrible Hope abuse and it means we're nearing the end of this story! Look how close I came to having Hope learn about Logan's past! Look it! The information on the name came from a book my mother has, and the amnesia information came from