TITLE: The Unintended

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Andromeda series, I'm just borrowing.

SPOILERS: Angel Dark, Demon Bright

NOTES: The quote is from Tug of War by Nikka Costa - it fit better than anything I could make up.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE Ever Again

"Cut to the truth and watch it bleed

And in the wounds just what we need

It's everywhere if we dare

To trust the fall to lead us there."

Earth lyric

Harper watched Rayne fall to the floor dead. He was definitely dead this time - there were three new holes in his chest to prove it. Harper exhaled sharply, almost amused. He let his head fall back against the wall and closed his eyes. He wasn't going to sleep, just rest. He had slept enough. Trance dropped the gun and swayed a little, still dizzy from the attack on her mind. She had every intention of seeing to Harper but her legs didn't agree and collapsed underneath her.

The doors to med-deck slid open. Three very out of breath people and one android burst in with weapons drawn. They took in the scene before going to help their fallen crewmen.

"Hey guys, whatever happened to getting here 'in the nick of time'?" Harper jested wearily.

Rommie crouched down beside Rayne's body while Dylan helped Trance to her feet.. "Isn't this..."

"Rayne," Harper replied. "Taylor's second. He had the virus, don't touch his blood."

Tyr, standing over the body, was sorry that he wasn't the one to end the vile man's life. He would have liked that opportunity. Nevertheless, he was dead now and that was good enough.

"He wanted a cure. He tried to...tried to take it from my mind," Trance told them. Her head still ached from the invasion. "We have to destroy every trace of that virus. Nothing good can come from it," she said seriously.

"It's okay, we will," Dylan assured, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Beka carefully stepped over Rayne and came down to Harper's level. She stroked his hair which was caked in sweat. "You okay kiddo?"

"Never better." Harper smiled at her without opening his eyes. "Although if you happen to have a big stack of painkillers lying around, I wouldn't say no."

"I'll see what I can do, come on," she said with a smiled, pulling him up.

"We'll set you up somewhere temporary until this place can get decontaminated," Dylan declared.

Harper pulled away from Beka's steadying hand to kneel by Ana.

"What happened to her?" Rommie asked. There were only so many things that caused an AI to stop moving and none of them were very pleasant.

"She saved us," Trance said. She spoke like Ana was dead, but Harper wasn't going to give up that easily. It was nothing that he couldn't fix. "I need to get her back online. God knows what that bastard did to her." Harper realised what he was thinking - thinking about using his tools and his hands to fix Ana. For a moment it seemed like he remembered who he was before things got crazy. Before he got crazy. It was the first time he had felt normal since his return.

"I'll start making an damage assessment," Rommie offered, knowing Harper didn't need to be working after such an ordeal. "You should rest."

Harper realised he was too tired to argue. Now it was finally over he could sleep again knowing he would not only wake up, but wake up to people who still cared about him no matter what he had done.

"I'll need to test everyone onboard for the virus, just to be safe.," Trance declared, the pain finally beginning to disperse.

"We'll get right on it, but both of you are getting a break. Let us worry about cleaning up, alright?"

Trance nodded as Dylan led her out of the room, the others in tow. Harper took one last look at Rayne's lifeless body before the doors to med-deck slid shut behind them.

Two hours later and the clean-up was complete. There was nothing left of the virus, the crew were given the all-clear for the tests. Beka strolled into Command where Tyr was manning the stations.

"Well, that's the last of the tests back," Beka announced. "No traces of the virus anywhere. It's over and done with, and not a moment too soon. I don't know if I could stand anymore of that...insanity."

"Insanity is right," Tyr said pointedly. Beka sensed a disagreement coming on. "Are we just supposed to forget about the massacre of who knows how many Nietzscheans?"

"He wasn't himself," Beka stated. It felt like she had been repeating it to herself like a mantra since Harper got back.

"From what I hear, he was," Tyr returned.. "And that is the what concerns me." He was referring to his and Dylan's chat after Harper's admission of the absence of guilt

Beka was getting agitated. "So what are you saying? That Harper would have been going around killing Nietzscheans long before now if he had the power?"

Tyr shrugged slightly. "It's not the first time. Need I remind you of the Battle of Witchhead? He had no qualms about wiping out 100,000 people then."

"I think that was a little different," Beka said, shaking her head.

"Was it?" Tyr pushed.

Beka threw her hands in the air. "Yes! We had to use Harper's device to set history right. We all made that decision, not just Harper," she reminded him, intent on defending Harper all the way.

"As I recall Harper didn't plan on telling us about his device and was only by chance that we found out about it."

"So what?" Beka was getting short of ideas to halt the argument. Why did Tyr always have to have the last word? "Harper's always hated Nietzscheans, it's no secret. Can you blame him? Can you honestly say that if your whole species was tortured by another for years on end that you'd be fine with it?" she tried, going down another line of defence.

"Perhaps not" Tyr submitted. "But hating a species is one thing. Killing them mindlessly is another. When we found the Dovien-Genghis ship you saw what we all saw on that screen; the bloodbath inches from his feet. I know it affected you. I saw it in your eyes."

At that point Dylan entered Command, though the others didn't hear him.

"The Dovien-Genghis pride were nothing more than vicious pirates," Beka argued. "You have no idea what they did to him over there."

"Neither do you" Tyr countered. "Wouldn't it be apt to find out?"

Beka was quiet for a moment. She looked back at the console in front of her. "He's been through enough," she said quietly. "He doesn't need to relive it just so we can feel better about ourselves."

"Perhaps the reason you don't want to ask the questions is that you are afraid of the answers."

"Alright, that's enough," Dylan interrupted. "Do I need to remind you of what happened only two hours ago? This can wait for a more appropriate time. Right now we are going to get some sleep. I don't know about you guys but I am not prone to being awake for longer than a day at a time."

Beka knew he was right, and not just about the sleep thing. But before she would be getting any rest she did need to see Harper. Though she wouldn't admit it, Tyr was right. She was afraid to ask the questions, for fear Harper would confirm what she dreaded. But fear never stopped a Valentine.

Tyr wasn't one to turn down a break when it was offered so he followed Beka out of Command. Beka, intent of having the last word, stopped him with her hand. "Harper may have killed a few bad guys but he didn't hurt us. He saved us. You included. Just remember that."

Beka stood outside Harper's quarters debating whether or not to go in. Fear never stopped a Valentine but it sure did make them hesitate a lot. She shook it off for long enough to knock on the door.

"Just a second," Harper called.

Beka composed herself while Harper moved around behind the doors. "Hey," she said when they opened.

"Hey. What's up?" Harper asked, looking slightly awkward.

Beka wasn't surprised; their relationship was bound to be a little awkward for a while. "Oh nothing much. I just came to see how you were doing," Beka lied. But she supposed she shouldn't go ahead with her questions until she was sure he was up to it.

Harper shrugged. "Okay, I guess."

Beka nodded slowly. At least it hadn't been his patented 'I'm good' remark.

"Uh, you wanna come in?" Harper asked when the thought suddenly occurred to him.

"Oh, yeah, sure."

It wasn't so much a silence as a few very long pauses strung together. Every time one of the two thought of something to say, they would hold back. Beka eventually couldn't stand it any longer. They were friends. More than that. They had been together for far too long to be descending into awkward silences now. "I need to know what happened," she blurted out.

Harper wasn't following, or at least he pretended he wasn't. "What happened...when?"

"Since the beginning."

Harper sighed. He was afraid that's what she meant."Beka..."

"I need to hear it, Harper," she stopped him, mid-complaint. "It might be a selfish thing to ask and I know it's gotta be hard for you but...I really need to hear it if I'm going to work out how I feel."

Harper considered her words. They made sense. Besides, who was he to deny her her peace? If he couldn't find his, Beka should at least have a chance at finding hers. So he told her what she wanted to know. It was strange seeing her reactions to it all. Harper expected her to run out the room crying or look horrified at the details but she just sat there and listened.

"It was like I was so much more than I am now," Harper continued. "So much better, I...it was like nothing I ever imagined I could feel. And I can't imagine ever feeling that way again. Which is good, right? It means I'm going to forget."

Harper realised when he had finished the story that Beka was the only person onboard he could imagine telling it to. If it had been anyone else he would have told them to take a hike. It could have been due to the fact that Beka was the one person most likely to forgive him. In that respect, Harper realised how much was riding on her trusting him again. If she didn't, no-one would.

Beka was quiet while she took it all in. Harper seemed a little unsure but at least he was making sense of things. And that, for now, was good enough. "Thank-you for telling me.

"Thanks for listening. Actually feels kinda good to be getting it all off my chest, you know? Telling the story means it's over, right?"

"Right," Beka reassured. "Every trace of the virus has been destroyed. The Outset, the Nietzschean ship, The Barbell, they're all gone. Rayne is dead, and you're free from it. There's nothing left. It's over."

Harper considered that fact for a moment. He supposed it hadn't really sunk in, not even after Rayne was dead (again). It had felt like forever since the madness began. "It is, isn't it?" He smiled faintly. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Beka returned his smile. It was a relief to see it. "Night," she said, and left for her quarters.

Harper stood still for a while wondering if he actually believed a word he had just told Beka. He sighed. He didn't have to make the decision now. There was no sense in destroying them when he hadn't decided either way. There would be plenty of time. Harper carefully folded the clothes stained with Shyla's blood and put them in an airtight container. He placed the container in a compartment in the wall. For safekeeping.

END

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