ASHES - A Cinderella Story
Chapter Fourteen - Words That Make a Woman
Threads we've chosen from the skein
Weave a pattern in between
The shuttle dances end to end
Chapter Fourteen's set to spin.
HEAVEN WON'T BE HEAVEN WITHOUT YOU:
They entered like two battlers in the showdown of a grade 'B' movie, from opposite ends of the public refreshment facility.
Slowly they stalked towards each other, their faces a mask of concentration. As they moved, they divested themselves of any encumbrances that might get in the way when they went into action. At last they were face to face.
The smaller of the two frowned furiously. She turned aside and stepped off the stone ledge, growling, "That Loki made it sound like a game, and now everything is going wrong! I got wished into the badlands, out past the yonder pits, and had to climb out. Then I got splashed with some noxious goop that screwed up my appearance. I was an old hag, then I started getting younger. Now look at me! If I hadn't washed it off, I'd be in diapers!"
A very youthful Mara slipped into the water. She submerged her head beneath the steaming waters of the hot springs so she did not hear Urd's reply. Minutes later, Mara emerged to sputter, "Chemicals! Even here they use chemicals?"
"Fragrances," Urd corrected her, a tiny quirk to her lips. "You mean you actually believed Loki? I suppose that cute stunt warning me about a worm virus in Yygdrasil was his idea."
"Of course it was his lame idea! I would have done better! And, of course I don't trust Loki! But he appealed to Lord Twoface, who backed up his request."
Urd's grin broadened. "I'll bet you've never heard of Lord Twoface before. New devil in the office?"
Mara hesitated, glowering. "He came from one of the darker reaches, I heard."
"Let me tell you something. I've seen Loki-sama get tight at parties and do his 'splitting image' trick. One time he performed a wresting match by himself - an ogre and a rock-dragon. Oh, and he played the referee, as well."
"Oh, who cares? I have my own problems! Nothing I've tried will nullify this spell! I'm stuck as a juvenile!"
"Awww. I thought you looked cute. About thirteen?"
"Grrrrr...If I wasn't supposed to be working with you, I'd..."
"Oh, all right, fourteen. Steady down, I'll talk to Loki about it. Maybe he knows what made it stick," Urd made no attempt to hurry, nor to hide her mirth. "You want me to tell him you've had enough?"
Mara slung water about as she shook her head. "I'm going to play this thing out!" she declared. "You can't get rid of me that easy!"
Standing with arms akimbo, Urd watched sunlit reflections from the pool play across alabaster columns. "Oh, by the way," she added thoughtfully, "Since we are working together' - Morisato is still off limits. You'll leave him alone?"
Mara pursed her lips pensively, stuck out her chin and looked Urd square in the eye. "No," she replied.
Urd smiled thinly. "Just so we understand each other."
"I understand. Wimp!"
"Care for a little bet?"
"Eh?" Mara lifted her head to peer at her, "What kind of a bet?"
"Oh, that you don't get your man."
"I'll get him!"
"Two bottles of sake."
"You're on! Oh, and I'll get that stupid PDA you tied around the pig, too."
Urd looked blank for a moment, then answered automatically, "Fat chance!" She grimaced at the time on her wrist display. "Gotta go. Don't bother seeing me to the door, I'll just leave you a little entertainment." She pressed a button on a bejeweled box and dropped it onto the bricks as she left. From speakers within the box came a tinny disco beat, swelling in volume.
Mara held her ears and railed, "You rat! You know I can't help dancing to disco! I'll fall on my ass if I have to jump around in this water and...hey, waitaminute..." Urd was almost out of earshot when the timbre of Mara's voice changed from rage to gloating.
"That's one thing you won't use on me, next time!" Mara exulted maliciously. "It's time for me to go into the final phase of my plan, and you won't delay me! Temporary loss of my powers can't stop me! A few items from my workshop, and I will succeed!" Of course, the fact that her maniacal demonic laughter was expressed in an adolescent falsetto voice might have made it sound a little less ominous.
The Norn of the Past was too occupied with other things to notice. "Maybe it's about time I checked that temp's background," Urd said to herself as she left the bathhouse.
BLACK CLOUD HANGING OVER MY HEAD:
If earth did met heaven, what would they play? If heaven did meet earth, what would they say?
"There you are! Right where I thought you would be! Can I call them, or what?"
Ryoga, who found himself facing a beautiful, platinum-haired goddess, froze in his steps and said, "What?"
"Did you know that you are one very, very difficult person to track down?" Urd took him companionably by the elbow and steered him off the street, through the wayfarers shopping at the open market.
"Uhhhnn...no?" Ryoga scratched behind his ear as he thought over his situation. This contemplation included being chased all over Japan by a demoness, being yelled at and slapped by countless women who felt that their wishes were taken too literally, being grumped at by countless men because their wishes were not taken literally enough, being chased by children who figured out that he was involved when wishes were granted, being chased by hungry animals and people because he was a pig, being turned into a pig because of Ranma, when all the time he was in love with Akane who did not know he existed. In short, the contemplation took all of two seconds, after which Ryoga shouted, "I wish you'd take this magic stuff away from me!"
"Now, that I can do. In fact," Urd added, "This is the reason I have been looking for you, to take back your bracelet and to drain this power out of your aura." She raised a slender tree-branch, tapped Ryoga on the head three times, and said, "There. That should do it."
"Take this thing!" Ryoga said, attempting to remove the bracelet from his wrist and shove it toward her. The bracelet remained stuck to his hand as if it had been glued, even though he shook it fiercely. He glared at it and blurted, "I can't turn loose of it!"
"Oops," Urd said. "The 'remove bracelet' spell doesn't seem to be working. No matter. You won't be able to grant any more wishes, and Mara shouldn't be chasing you anymore. Keep the trinket as a souvenir."
Ryoga stopped struggling and looked at her hopefully. He asked, "Does that mean that I am back to normal?"
"Absolutely," Urd replied smugly as she wrapped the twig and stored it away.
Ryoga turned to the nearest stone wall and prodded it with a finger. He proclaimed, "Bakusai tenketsu!" He then gaped in dismay at the huge balls of fuzzy glitter drifting down from the ashen sky.
"That - is not supposed to happen, is it?" Urd asked, one hand to her mouth. There were tiny sparkles to the glitter, incandescent trails scripted gold. Something was wrong. Very wrong.
Ryoga merely shook his head from side to side, watching the descending spheres. One popped into sparks before his eyes and evaporated into a glowing mist.
------------
"We need to test this," said Urd. "Of course, it won't prove anything if I were to make a wish, so we'll have to find a human subject."
Ryoga nodded mutely and followed her as she approached a street vendor who was taking down the sign from his cart. The man worked slowly, blinking tiredly as he finished tying up his goods. He brightened at the sight of a beautiful woman.
Urd positioned Ryoga by the vendor and asked, "If you could have anything you wanted, what would you wish?"
The vendor eyed her appreciatively, evaluated his own capabilities, and yawned, "I am a simple man, tired from a long day's work. I would wish for something small, and simple. If I could have anything I wanted, I would wish for..."
He fell over his cart, fast asleep.
"That was...strange," Urd said, uneasily. They went to look for another test subject.
Ryoga scratched his head again, looking back at the dozing vendor. "Probably wanted to sleep for a week," he suggested.
"That's it! But why did it happen before he could even finish? Apparently, you still have the wish power, but it seems somehow distorted," Urd thought frantically, then said, "It's as if something were augmenting it. Did Basho do anything to you?"
"Well," Ryoga slogged along in thought for a moment. "He did stop a tree from attacking me. He said it was the work of a demoness."
Urd hesitated, disturbed by a growing suspicion. "What kind of a tree?" she asked, unwrapping the slender branch and showing it to him.
"That's it! It was an ash."
"Oh, no! When he stopped the tree from attacking you, he somehow slipped part of his spell onto you. Now, when I tried to remove the spell, using an ash twig, the spell changed."
Ryoga eyed her. "Is that bad?" he wondered.
"Actually, it depends on how the spell has been changed," Urd said, raising a finger as she enumerated the possibilities. "One: It could be a good change."
"I wish this dust would settle!" cried a shopkeeper who was sweeping down the sidewalk in front of his store. For one minute there was an inundation of biblical proportions.
"Two: On the other hand..." Urd held up another finger, dripping wet. She looked around for Ryoga.
"Buue?" There was a little black piglet looking up at her, with a yellow bandana and a charm bracelet about his neck.
"Pork!" cried a nearby butcher, who closed and locked his store with the speed derived from hard training under a master's tutelage. The butcher then raised a cleaver and approached. "Here, piggy, piggy!"
"Bueeee!" Ryoga was gone, pursued by the butcher.
"Hey, wait a minute!" called Urd, spinning around. "Where did he go? This could get bad!"
HIROSHI (SUSPICION):
I was still shape-shifted when I arrived back at my apartment. I would have simply walked in, but my augmented senses warned me that someone was waiting inside, watching the front door.
So I went around and sneaked in the back, the better to raid the refrigerator. Hey, a guy has to keep up his strength, doesn't he? Besides, I had been doing all that martial arts stuff. I was shoveling it in when I switched back to myself and my clothes got all tangled. Juggling orange juice, snack and tablecloth, I didn't spill a drop. Some things I could do better as myself.
With my mouth full I turned and there were Mom and Pops, standing like temple statues.
Mom had a determined look on her face. It was the last scene of Act II, the critical confrontation.
"Hiroshi-chan," she announced, "we have to talk."
"Right now?" I mumbled around the remains of a rice ball. How long had they been standing there? Had they seen a slim, trim athletic girl slip into the kitchen and metamorph into their son? Was that why they were looking so grim?
"First, we have to tell you..." Mom was doing the talking. Pops was standing like a rock in the middle of the door, blocking my escape, and he let Mom have her say immediately. That was bad. Usually, Mom would let Pops bluster until he ran down, then she would step in and said what she was going to say in the first place.
She continued, "We have to tell you, son, that you won't be bothered by that girl, anymore."
"Heh," I tried to swallow, but my throat was dry. "What girl?" I finally coughed.
"That's the spirit, my boy!" Pops burst out, but a cold look from Mom deflated him. "I said the wrong thing, huh?" he asked her.
She snubbed him to return her intense focus on me. "We have taken steps to remove a...a...a malignant influence from you and your room," Mom said. "Tomorrow, we shall warn your school officials of the danger."
"Aww, Mom," I said with a big, brave grin. "I haven't been in any danger!"
I hesitated. I could never lie to Mom. Yes, I had been in danger.
"Anyway, not from any girl!"
Another hesitation, as she regarded me with one eye almost closed. Yes, I admitted to myself. From a girl.
"At least, not THAT girl," I amended weakly, digging myself in even deeper.
Mom was wearing her most fearsome expression. "Hiroshi-chan," she breathed, "that is what we must talk about." Pops stood aside and fidgeted, trying to look aloof.
"Son, your father and I have to ask you some questions. Frankly, Hiroshi-chan, you have been acting rather strangely lately, and..."
"What's that in your hands, my boy?" Pops blurted.
"This? Oh. Heh," Mom could always make me talk. Then, after I started talking, Pops would blind-side me. I was never any good at dodging Pop's questions. He had a way of boring straight through my answers. "It's sort of a tablecloth from the Cat Cafe," I stammered. "Wrapped around a robe I borrowed from Mousse."
"What are you doing with their tablecloth?" Mom wanted to know, while Pops zeroed in on another area.
"Robe?" he wanted to know. "I thought it looked like a dress. A girl's dress!"
"It belongs to a guy, Pops. I borrowed it from him."
"Him?" he appeared relieved, but only momentarily. With a twitch to his left eye, he demanded, "Ain't Mousse that effeminate waiter from that joint where your friends hang out?"
"You're thinking about Konatsu, Pops," I said. "He works at Ucchan's, but he hasn't been seen for the last few days."
"Why would you take their tablecloth?" Mom asked, covering her mouth in apprehension. "Did something come over you and make you steal it?"
"I only borrowed it, Mom!"
"But whatever for?"
I bit my lip, wanting to tell the truth. Mom had that effect on me. She could compel a master spy to give up his secrets. Life would have been so much more convenient if I could have complied. However, I could imagine what would happen if I were to tell them:
'i wanted to be sure i was covered up, mom.' 'why?' 'well, the last time i turned into a girl, i was wearing underwear.' 'shriek!' mom would collapse. 'son, why were you wearing that sissy chinese robe? get your mom some water. she fainted.' (pops would ignore anything in my conversation with mom that he did not understand. including the part about turning into a girl.) 'because the tablecloth disappeared with the rest of my clothes, pop.' 'you were running around nude? what's wrong with that?' 'i was a girl at the time, pop.' 'so you had to steal this sissy robe? that's not very manly!'
"It's for a class play," I lied. "Tomorrow. They put me on the scenery committee and told me to provide part of the costumes."
"Oh, that's good," Mom said, very relieved. "I wish we could see your play, but we won't have time."
"We're only looking out for your welfare, boy." Pops said, his doubtful eyes still on the bundle in my arms.
"Yes, there are such terrible things out in the world, waiting to pounce upon our children," Mom said. "That is why we worry about the way you have been sneaking around, and hiding, and closing us out of your life. It is important that I can rely on you, especially now, when..."
"Are you doing drugs, boy?" Pops interjected.
"What?" As upset as I was about worrying Mom, having Pops distrust me sent a shock wave to the center of my being.
"We will talk about it tomorrow night," Mom said, pressing her palm to her forehead in real or dramatized pain. On my way up the stairs, I looked back and saw them huddled in conversation, watching me. Hainoko's door was closed.
LONG DISTANCE INFORMATION:
Urd adjusted the transcendental headset and commanded, "System."
The responding voice was high, lilting, "Accessing."
"Ring Zero."
"Accessing."
"Peorth."
"Speaking," the voice solidified into granite.
"I'd like a little information on what I'm doing," Urd began, intimidated in spite of herself. She did not enjoy being intimidated. It rankled that Peorth was her probation officer for readmission into the Relief Service. Since Peorth had taken on a position near the main control, she had become...obsessive. More so than usual.
"You are handling a console on the Goddess Relief Line. Speaking of which, there have been a few - minor - fluctuations reported, lately."
Urd felt a bead of sweat on her temple. She definitely did not like being intimidated. "I'm also helping a friend, a high- ranking deity. I don't feel I have all the data I should have been given."
Peorth seldom laughed much anymore. However, there was a grim humor in her reply, "I would hardly call Loki a 'high-ranking' anything. You're taking a chance getting mixed up with him."
"I choose my friends," growled Urd. "What's wrong with Loki?"
"Let's just say he has a few character traits that are...not exactly aligned with absolute truth."
Urd set her teeth, holding back her automatic response. To Peorth, all character traits were flawed, except her own 'holier than thou' attitude.
"What was that?"
"Nothing!" Urd said, hurriedly. "I need some information regarding Loki's arrangements."
"Denied."
"I'd like to speak to him, at least."
"Denied."
"All right. Since I have your ear, I have been trying to reach Belldandy and she is not available."
"In conference. Out of deference for her assignment, the meeting is being held at an educational facility on Earth."
"Skuld?"
"Also in the meeting."
"Then why the...heaven...wasn't I invited to this meeting?"
Peorth's reply was sardonic, "You had duties. Speaking of which, I see you are involving a mortal in your dealings with Loki. Surely you realize what jeopardy that entails, should your 'temporary services' cause trouble."
"I'll take responsibility for whatever he's done," growled Urd. "You can bust my chops all you want to, but leave the hired help out of it, okay?"
"Your privilege - and your responsibility. We are holding them blameless, for the moment. You're the one who got creative with her duties in the relief office. You weren't included in the access list since we expected you to be very busy cleaning up your mess." The ice in Peorth's smile was almost visible as she continued, "I have located Loki, but he had to attend some important negotiations and he isn't available to explain anything. Haven't you gotten the drift, yet? You have more pressing matters to attend, such as reducing the fluctuation on your...oh, my!"
"What?" Puzzled, Urd looked around the chamber and suddenly backed away. "Yike!" she added, "I'll get back to you." She immediately summoned her non-cooperative monk helper.
FLATTERY, SEDUCTION, AND BRIBERY (GIVE ME MONEY):
"Just what are you up to, Daddy?" Nabiki was breathing heavily as she slid behind a column. The building was a museum which had recently opened a display of aquatic fauna. Soun was standing near the entrance, talking to a tall, statuesque woman in an concealing costume.
Soun had proved elusive, a quality for which Nabiki had never given him credit. After leaving Hiroshi at the Cat Cafe, she had spotted her father through a crowd of shoppers and had given chase. Once he had stopped to chat with someone in a robe, but she could not get close enough without being seen to recognize the other person. Twice, Soun had glanced about as if expecting discovery, and each time he had melted into the crowd while Nabiki was trying to make herself invisible.
As Soun scanned the area a third person appeared, and they all seemed to vanish.
"Dang! They gave me the slip again! I'm almost certain that was Miss Hinako with Daddy, and after he told us he wasn't interested in her!" Nabiki fumed for a moment, "I'm going to find out where you go to, Daddy! I swear I won't give up until I do!"
Pre-occupied with her fuming, she almost ran into another person. Since this person was only a little over a meter tall, Nabiki had to bend over to speak to her.
"Hainoko-chan! What are you doing out here all alone? Where are your parents?"
Hainoko looked solemnly up at her, extended her lower lip, and said, "Mommy don't know I'm running away."
"Oh, great," moaned Nabiki. "I've got a father going through his second childhood, a client who's more trouble than Ranma, and now I'm stuck with taking care of a runaway!"
"You don't have to take care of me," the little runaway backed off.
"I'm stuck with you. See, ordinarily, I'd just turn and walk away, or call a policeman, or something. But I made a stupid wish that I didn't know was a wish and 'bam!'. You're like flypaper. You show up everywhere I turn! I can't get rid of you! Why can't you just stay home?"
"Hiroshi hates me," replied Hainoko, softly. "Mommy is all tired from taking care of both me and Hiroshi. Maybe if I go away, Mommy will get better. It don't matter. Nobody cares, anyway."
"Oh, yes, they do!" Nabiki surprised herself by shouting, "Don't you ever think that! Of course they love you! Your mother is going to be hysterical when she finds you missing!" Grabbing a small hand, she turned Hainoko around to face the way she had come and added, "You're headed home, right now!"
"Um...if I have to," Hainoko agreed reluctantly, seeing that she had no choice.
"Listen to me, Shrimp. Go home. Your mommy is going to want you there, I promise you. Will you do that? What are you looking at?"
"Your hair."
"There's nothing wrong with my hair!" Nabiki flared.
"I know. I wish my hair looked like yours. Mine is all long and tangly, and Mommy gets so tired brushing it."
"Yeah, you're cute, too. Come on. I'm taking you home."
"Okay. I'm getting sleepy, anyway."
Nabiki jumped a startled foot into the air as a short dumpling of a woman, dressed in a kimono of finest silk, burst out of the shrubbery.
"Welcome!" cried the woman. Nabiki recognized her as the twin's mother she had visited in her capacity as Cinderella's agent.
"Welcome!" repeated the matronly woman. "I am terribly sorry! I never properly introduced myself when we spoke, earlier! My name is Gouman, but you can call me Gouman-chan! Can I get you some refreshments?"
"Gouman-CHAN?" Nabiki blinked. She looked again at the woman's dumpy appearance, frowzy hair and tight-lipped, shrewish face. "Oh, sure," she muttered. "And you can call me Her Serenity, Queen Nabiki the Magnificent."
"I'm sorry, Dear. I didn't quite catch what you were saying."
"Never mind. How are you going to get refreshments in the middle of the night?"
"Oh, forgive me! Prepare my hospitality!" Gouman-chan's bodyguards, Tengu and Matsoyuro, appeared at once. They whipped back a curtain and exhibited a tiny ice cream parlor, complete with a table and chairs. From behind the counter they produced bowls of golden vanilla ice cream crowned with fruit and chocolate, one for Nabiki and one for Hainoko.
"I presume there is a reason you are offering this to me," Nabiki said, warily.
"When I make a mistake, I say it!" Gouman declared. "And now, I admit that I was wrong! You had every right to walk out on my offer, and I am here to tell you that I am going to make everything right!"
Nabiki stopped with the first spoonful dripping chocolate sauce over the fine embroidered tablecloth. "Exactly how 'right' are you planning to make it?" she wondered aloud.
Gouman chuckled, in good humor. "Why, anything you want it to be! There is more than one way for us to get what we both want," she purred. "There is a fantastic swimming pool here on the estate. You could host parties here, I would pick up the bill, and you could invite all your friends. If you wanted, you could even charge them admission."
"You'd pay for the refreshments?"
"My husband owns a catering service, a movie theater, a radio station, a limousine service, candy shops, dress shops. He could be very generous if I dropped a word in his ear. He's such a sweet, giving man."
"A giving man is nice," Nabiki reflected, glancing about the impromptu shop with its expensive decorations, brand labels showing.
"But there is something I would like to ask you to do," continued the matron as she brought out another triple tiered multi- flavored sundae. "It would mean SO much to my sweet daughters if your friend would sing for their birthday party."
"That shouldn't be too much trouble," Nabiki mused as she licked the spoon and contemplated the second frozen confection. "After all, I AM her agent."
"They both are WILD about any kind of music, being children, and they begged me to get Cinderella. You know how children are."
"Um," Nabiki nodded before savoring the nougat ripple. Hainoko had stopped eating after the first statement and was following Gouman-chan with her eyes while her lower lip protruded.
Gouman-chan continued, "Once they get something in their head, they just have to get their way. Their father and I will pay anything to satisfy them."
"'Pay anything' sounds good, too."
"And you will be their hero! You'll be bringing them their favorite singer! They'll probably use up their entire allowance to pay you to bring her back! Their allowance is in six figures, of course. Each. Weekly."
Six figures. At a minimum, that made 100,000 yen per week. Multiply that by two. If Hiroshi's misfortune continued for several more weeks, that might mean... Nabiki reached for another bite as the money accumulated in her mind. Hainoko's solemn face interfered with her calculations and she had to do them over.
"And, so, if, while she's singing for the party, if you could get your friend to sing an extra song or two...you know, just for a few friends."
"A few friends," Nabiki looked up at her.
"Very dear friends."
"With expensive recording equipment."
"They would SO love to have a souvenir of the event. You'd get a commission for each one, of course. Just sign here. No need to read the fine print."
"For how long?"
"For you, we could make it forever. Think of it. Every time she sang, you would get paid." Gouman-chan oozed reassurance, expectantly holding forth the paper and a glittering gold pen.
A huge cherry poised on a chocolate plateau before oozing toward the cliff edge. Nabiki watched it toboggan down the vanilla slope as she debated with herself. She had seen that look before, the calculating fire in Gouman-chan's eyes. A sudden realization made her forget her caution.
"The wish is not compelling me to refuse!" Nabiki wondered, before she recalled, "That's right! My contract says that I can't go out and look for gigs for Cinderella, but if someone else offers, then I can accept!" And that's an awfully tempting offer!
Hainoko tugged at her elbow to whisper, with a stricken expression, "Please don't do that to Cinderella! Poor Hiroshi will be practically a slave!"
Nabiki had to concede that it was a very simple decision to make. Say 'yes', make a bundle; or say 'no' and keep a bothersome, snotnosed kid from whining.
Kids cry all the time. Who cares? Nobody cared when she was little and she cried. Nobody but Mom...
"Make up your mind. I can't keep this offer open forever!" Gouman-chan declared. "After all, I have a lot of other rock stars I could invite. Why, I hear Rock Cliff is very available, since Primrose has become so popular."
Nabiki took one look at Hainoko's brimming tears, then at Gouman-chan's face. Yes, she had seen that look before. In a mirror. She clamped her jaw tightly and growled between clenched teeth, "Aw, crap."
"Well? What's it to be?"
"I'll have to think about it," Nabiki rose from the elegant chair with the price-label dangling and pushed the pen away from her as it were made of gold. Solid, heavy gold. With diamonds embedded, in the kanji for Tendo, Nabiki.
"You're leaving? I can't believe this! You'll pay! Worse yet, your rock star will pay!" Gouman-chan indicated the pseudo-sumo brothers, who grinned malevolently and cracked their knuckles in anticipation.
"That's a chance he'll have to take," Nabiki told them. "C'mon, Brat, let's take you home. You've already cost me a night's work and maybe millions in yen."
Hainoko watched behind as she was carried away, twisting in Nabiki's arms to keep the matron and her bodyguards in sight. Then she turned to peer at the taut face of her bearer.
"Thank you, Aunty Nabiki," she whispered.
"Don't try to butter me up, Kid. I'm still angry with you!"
HELP (I need somebody):
Waves of unease tinged in anger radiated off the silver-haired woman. Basho waited nervously as a no-longer seductive goddess paced back and forth in front of a large stony mass. Eventually, Urd stopped pacing and commanded, "Read the message. On the block."
He took in the gleaming letters, 'Suggest you maintain control of wish expenditure,' etched into the one-ton mass and gasped, "THIS is a message?"
"Your replacement, Ryoga, has begun to act...oddly," Urd said. "Kami-sama noticed."
"Kami-sama blasts boulders to send messages?" Basho gaped in disbelief, even as he edged toward the exit. Urd caught him and steered him back to the message stone.
"No, Kami-sama is not so subtle," Urd assured him. "But Kami-sama noticed, and someone noticed that Kami-sama noticed, and so on down the line. This - " she patted the sleek stone facing, " - is a routine memo block telling me to do something. Since you are partly responsible, I thought you might want to join in." The steel in her gaze told Basho that he had just volunteered, "You ARE going to help me do something, aren't you?"
The pudgy monk nodded quickly and violently.
"Exactly what DID you use in your spell to protect my wishbringer from Mara?" she asked.
"A rune of benediction, a scribble of heavenly protection, and a word of command to leave him alone." Basho beamed, glad that she seemed to be impressed with his acts. Good deeds were the foundation of his temple's teachings, and he had apparently executed his task well.
Unfortunately, he was having trouble keeping his attention away from her predominant features, or rather from her garments and what they were displaying in provocative glory. It did not help that she insisted on standing close and leaning toward him.
"Benediction?" Urd leveled great, gray, questioning eyes at him.
"Oh, yes! It is not good to take something from another creature without offering something else in its place."
"Command?" She leaned closer yet and Basho, eyes bulging, began to sweat.
"I...I told the tree to refrain from trying to influence the wish bringer."
"Protection?"
Basho beamed again and bobbed his shiny head.
Urd tapped her fingers against her hip. Since the garment boasted an elegant cutaway style, Basho's gaze bounced along in sympathetic rhythm. Her frown deepened as she listed Basho's actions, below the level of his hearing.
Finally, she spoke aloud again, "You accomplished a 'scribble of heavenly protection'? Where did you learn this script?"
"Ah...I observed Sensei, one time, when he thought I was not looking."
Urd pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm going to have his ass for being that careless!" she growled. "The trouble is, I don't know if it is part of a larger operation being conducted by - " she paused and looked upward, " - higher authorities, or simple bad luck. Since the beginning of this farce there have been a lot of odd things happening!"
After a few moments, Basho realized that she was watching him, one eyebrow raised. Since he was, in turn, watching her more curvaceous aspects, he gave a guilty start before snapping to a military attention, eyes straight ahead.
"You are dangerous, but I don't have time to go through your training and filter what you should know from what you shouldn't," she said. "Find Ryoga Hibiki. Take your 'protection' off him. And continue to protect him from Mara - only do NOT use 'heavenly script' to do it!"
"Yes Ma'am-sama!" responded Basho, departing with alacrity.
Urd went back to her own search. At the same time she listened closely to her telltales, the anticipation of an actual dispatch from Kami-sama causing a chill of apprehension.
"Oh, for the good old days," she muttered as she zeroed in on the latest pig-sightings.
DEVOTED (To You):
"We're home," announced Hainoko. "You can quit hugging me and put me down, now."
"I wasn't hugging you!" Nabiki protested, releasing her. "I was trying to keep you from falling. If you got a scratch, your mother would make me pay the hospital bill!"
"Okay," Hainoko peered up at her solemnly. "I'll go in alone. I don't want them to know I've been out."
"Oh, yeah, now that you mention it, how's your Mom? Not that I care, but..."
"She has to rest a lot. Bye."
"Bye, Runt. And stay away from me. I don't want you around. You bother me."
"Okay, 'Biki-san. Be careful going home."
"I will. Don't get caught."
"Bye."
"Bye...arrrgh! I'm leaving! I'm going!"
Nabiki watched as the little girl shinnied up the tree trunk and slipped into her own bedroom window. She sighed and turned to head home, growling, "Now I'm worrying about her falling out of a tree while climbing in a window! I'm going to KILL Ryoga for this!"
From an open apartment window came a shriek, "My baby! Where is my baby? Hainoko's gone!"
Nabiki stopped to listen to doors slamming, furniture being moved and lights flickering on and off as the apartment was searched. Shortly, Hiroshi called, "Here she is! In the kitchen!"
"What?" came Hainoko's small voice, muffled as if impeded by a bite of sandwich, "I was hungry! What's the big deal?"
Nabiki decided it was time to see if Kasumi had any leftovers in the Tendo family refrigerator. She looked back once, a tiny smile quickly replaced by a scowl as she muttered, "Brat!"
SEARCHIN':
The little black pig had to be close.
Urd flew down the narrow lanes, seeking frantically. As she flew, she muttered, "I will not panic, I will not panic, I will not panic..."
She overheard:
"This just in!" warbled a television announcer, "Authorities are baffled by strange events across all of Tokyo - foreign princes and princesses, new automobiles, handsome men and beautiful women dressed in outlandish and ancient garb, piles of gold and jewelry have all appeared from nowhere, and for fifteen minutes the entire structure of Tokyo tower appeared to be built of...I don't understand...does this say 'peppermint candy'?"
"Ohboy," Urd hissed through clenched teeth as she hurried on.
A child's cry: "Mommy, I want a pet monkey!"
-poof-
A mother's screech: "Get that gorilla away from my child!"
A vendor's lament: "Hey, leave my bananas alone!"
An enthusiastic endorsement for bananas: "Hooh-hooh-hooh..."
Urd increased her pace, "I'm getting close. Not time to panic, yet. I can still find him and stop him. No panic. No panic..."
A child's cry: "Daddy, can I have a boat?"
-poof-
An ocean liner's song: "BWOOOOOOOTT!"
A vendor's lament: "Yaaaaaaah! There's a steamship in the duckpond!"
Urd jerked her head around at the distant, angry growl of thunder.
"Okay, time to panic, time to panic. Basho! Where the heaven are you?"
And time passed until the next morning, the hour when punctual students were preparing for school.
CRYSTAL BLUE PERSUASION:
"Akane!"
He staggered now and then as he made his way through the tangled undergrowth, his steps dragging with fatigue. One thought kept him going, one word on his lips - Akane.
Life hangs by a thread in the jungle. One false step and you could be mired in quicksand, or snag your legs in the twisted, tangled thorny vines that litter the jungle floor, or run head on into a deadly fanged beast which will tear you limb from limb.
"R.r.r.r.r.rr..."
Ryoga had known the fear of pursuit. That tiger, crashing through the undergrowth in Burma. The pride of lionesses which had almost surrounded him on the veldt. The...something...which had skittered close behind him across the Himalayan snowpacks, as lightly as a blown leaf, though it must have weighed a quarter of a ton. Lastly, he had been pursued by a butcher. He had fled, as a pint-sized porker, beasts which could have paralyzed the bravest of men.
Sometimes he could hear them, calling from the shadows - fierce, menacing, slavering with blood-lust, wild for vengeance. The very sound of their breathing marked the vicinity of a killer.
Or worse.
"R.r.r.r.r.rr..."
Nothing, however, matched the unease he felt at this rumbling snarl. Every capable martial artist develops a sixth sense which warns him of danger. Sometimes, however, that sense is overshadowed by other emotions. For instance, Ryoga was really, really, sad.
"Why can't I find Akane?"
Hacking his way through the dense tropical undergrowth did not make him feel any better. Still, after a while, even the most severe distractions must subside - especially when the martial artist is about to push through the foliage into the open, where he is subject to attack. Brushing aside the deep green fronds to step over a stream, he paused.
That gurgling, splashing brook.
The grass alongside it had been neatly manicured.
Also, the banks of the stream had been lined with perfectly fitted stones in an attractive arrangement, which led naturally to a paved walkway, where he found -
"R.r.r.r.r.rr..."
"Na...Nabiki Tendo!" Ryoga exclaimed, "What are you doing in Sumatra?"
"Hello, Ryoga," purred Nabiki. "Or, should I say, 'Hello, Dead Meat?'"
"Dead? Meat?" Ryoga squeaked, "What kind of meat?"
Nabiki observed his flinch and pounced, "Oh, I don't know. Chicken. Cow. Pork. Take your pick. Enjoy your last meal."
Ryoga managed to squeal, "Pork? Last meal? Do you know something?"
Nabiki shook her head, not to answer his question but to express annoyance at her own plight. "How about you?" she snapped. "Do you know anything about a certain wish that you granted for me?"
"Ah...no?"
"Oh, come on! You take one little statement out of context, blow it up into an affection for a horrid rugrat, and then you try to pretend you don't know what you did? Why did you run away?"
"I was being chased! By a demon! You'd run, too!"
"Oh, right. Just where was this demon? What does he look like?"
"She was a horrible old hag! With gray, stringy hair, and a jagged nose and ugly face!"
Nabiki stood, chin in hand, tapping the sidewalk with a toe. "And she wants you because..."
"Because I grant w...I can't talk about it! That's how she finds me!"
"If you're trying to make me feel sorry for you, you're going about it the wrong way. I didn't see any old hag after you."
"The last time I got away from her, she was younger than you. She rides around in this black cloud, and..."
"Oh, wait. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I did see someone, about half bimbo and half 'the old woman in the well,'" Nabiki frowned. "You'd better not be lying to me, Hibiki."
"I swear, Nabiki Tendo, I am telling the truth!"
"And where have you been, recently?"
"Ehheh. I was...You want the truth?"
"Unvarnished. Or else."
"With a goddess? Trying to remove my wishing curse?"
Nabiki stared in shock. "You want to run that by me again? It sounded like 'getting my wishing ability removed.'"
"She tried! But it didn't work! Well, it did, sort of. That is, she tried, but it made things worse!"
"And now, you can't grant wishes? You put me off with a trick wish and then you dump the whole wish-giving thing before I even have a chance?"
"Ah, no. That's what I was saying! I'm stuck with it! And that demon is still chasing me! My life is a living hell!"
"Whew! I can breath again! Does that mean you can still grant wishes? I'm glad of that!"
"All I wanted to do was to find Akane! Soon the goddess will succeed and I will never have another chance to help Akane! I have been trying to find the dojo, but everywhere I go is a jungle!"
"That's because you are wandering around in the park, knucklehead. Now, about those wishes..."
"I have to find Akane! Nothing else is important! I want to do some good for someone who deserves it!"
"Present company excepted?" Nabiki's expression darkened.
"I can't control it! I told you! I have no say, whatever, about it!"
"Well, you'd better work on it, and no tricks! Give me a wish I can hold in my hand! After all," Nabiki struck a kawaii pose. "I am a material girl."
"Now I see it!" Ryoga recoiled from her, "You have not received a wish because you were more than not deserving! I have been pursued by more than one demon! Nabiki Tendo, you are evil!"
"Oh, I wouldn't say I was evil," Nabiki tut-tutted him. Maybe a tad selfish - after all, a girl has to look out for herself."
"You would wish for material things while everyone else has to do without!"
"And that would be bad because...? Help me out here. This is an alien concept we're dealing with."
When she received no response other than an angry glare, Nabiki added, "If you don't come through, I'll tell Akane how infatuated you are with her."
Ryoga nodded, puzzled. "You would shame me, but I can survive! I have been trying for ages to tell her!"
"And, then, I'll tell her how your infatuation has made you mad with desire."
"I...think I could live through that. She must know, sooner or later! If you will tell her, then, we can be together!"
"Lastly, I will tell her how, in your pathetic madness, you seduced me because you could not have her."
"And then she will...what did you say?"
"And you took me to this deserted park and devastated my delicate body with your..."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? How DARE you imply that I could abandon my true love?" Ryoga froze in position as Nabiki held up a hand. He followed the direction of her finger as she pointed toward his clenched fist.
"Arrgghh!" he cried. "All my training has been undone! I have raised my hand to a defenseless woman! (Of course, it was only Nabiki Tendo, but..."
"Hey!" barked Nabiki.
"...but it shows the depths to which I can sink.) To think that I could consider harming any female! I have become abominable!"
"I'll tell you what your problem is, Hibiki. You obsess too much over details. By the way, you'd better calm down before you blow a gasket."
"I don't care! I cannot do anything that I want to do! I have nothing, I can do nothing, I am worth nothing..."
"Hey, calm down, Ryoga! You're starting to glow..."
"SHISHIHOKODAN!"
"Oh, frack..."
"Nothing happened! Even my most powerful chi blast has been reduced to nothing!"
"I wouldn't say nothing happened," Nabiki said, as she caught the slip of plastic whirring down in the wind. She read the flowing characters on it which said, "Bank of Paradise Credit Card. Good for Three Wishes for each possessor. May be shared." She admired the flourishes and pictures of birds and flowers outlining the card and heard the soft music. Her eyebrows ascended and she whistled.
Finally, she held the card aloft and declared, "I wish for a billion yen!"
Nothing happened.
"Why doesn't it work?" Nabiki shook the card as if she could somehow stir the recalcitrant plastic into cooperation. Blinking images on the underside of the card caught her eye, and she read,
"Can only be used by person(s) who are either
a) of superior moral character,
b) innocent as a child, or
c) nutty as a fruitcake. Teamwork is optional."
"I KNEW there had to be a catch!" Nabiki fumed, "Guess I'll have to bring in someone else. Fortunately, around here there should be no trouble fulfilling the third clause."
Ryoga was too busy looking in all directions to answer.
A noise echoed and Nabiki looked up and down the street, as Ryoga edged toward a large sign advertising a local hotel. Shooing Ryoga behind the sign, she reassured him, "Don't worry, I'll ward her off. Of course, I'll have to charge double rate for non-disclosure."
Folding the bills and securing them within her bookbag she waited, the picture of innocence, admiring the dew-covered flowers along the path. Basho came running up, holding his hassock high to clear his legs. Nabiki raised one eyebrow and waited for him to stop huffing.
"I am looking for Mr. Hibiki!" cried Basho. "I must prevent a horrible catastrophe!"
"Really?" Nabiki posed nonchalantly, tapping her chin, "Like, say, raining wish certificates?"
Basho gobbled in horror. "Don't even joke about that!" he cried.
"Believe me, I would never joke about that." Nabiki weighed the chances of getting another wish out of Ryoga against the merit of exacting revenge. The balance tipped when she remembered the ignominy of having to hug an obnoxious six-year old. "So, tell me," she said. "How badly do you want Hibiki?" The gasp of dismay from behind the sign was music to her ears.
"Very badly!" Basho stated.
"Exactly how badly?"
Basho stared at the upraised palm until comprehension dawned. As he withdrew bills from his pouch he complained, "What kind of a mercenary are you?"
"The vindictive kind. I never forget a slight. Or a misplaced wish," Nabiki decided that it was not necessary to mention the misplaced wish certificate she had concealed in her purse - after all, the monk had not said anything about it. "Ask him," she added as Ryoga stalked angrily from behind the sign. "I think I'm going to owe him a refund, darn it."
The monk and the martial artist faced each other. Basho waved a wand, chanted a few lines, and Ryoga untensed so completely he almost fell down.
"He was serious, all right! Looks like I got my ticket just in time," Nabiki sighed. "You two might as well come in for breakfast. I was just about to invite Ryoga in, anyway,"
She turned the corner and entered the gate to the dojo, holding tightly to the wish certificate and thinking, Now, where can I hide this so Ranma won't find it? I'll have to discuss the profit aspect with him before I make any decisions.
"That's odd," Basho tilted his head as if listening to some distant sound. "I was certain that I cured him entirely, and yet I still feel some magic around. What could it be?"
"Ah...maybe it's the wind," Nabiki shoved the slip of glittering plastic farther out of Basho's sight. This called for quick thinking - if Basho could demagic Ryoga, he could invalidate the wish card, too.
A commotion attracted her attention: Akane and Ranma arguing before leaving for school. Akane had prepared bentos for both of them and Ranma was balking.
Nabiki fairly purred with satisfaction, "But wait, what light from yonder window of opportunity breaks? Whoa. Too much like Kuno." She shook her head and hurried over to her sister, saying, "Hi, Akane! Morning, Saotome! Hey, Sis, your bento box is about to fall out of your backpack. Here, I'll adjust it."
It was a nearly flawless plan. Akane would not notice the slim card slipped into her bento box and Ranma would stick his head into a live volcano before he went near Akane's food. There would be plenty of time to retrieve the card before lunch.
"What's with Ryoga?" Ranma asked, "He taking to camping in the kitchen?"
"Poor Ryoga," mused Akane. "He looks so worn out! Is he alright?"
"He's fine," Nabiki assured them. "Just too tired to make it back to the dojo." She waved them off and waited until they were out of sight.
Now, all she had to do was convince the mad monk that Ryoga had not left a legacy. Turning to Basho, she said, "So. You really did it." She tapped the recumbent Ryoga, who rolled over and smiled in his sleep. "You took away his ability to grant wishes?"
"Oh, absolutely," beamed Basho, only then noticing her dispirited air. "Aren't you happy?"
"'Oh, absolutely,'" mimicked Nabiki in a convincingly aggrieved tone. "I didn't get my wish, you idiot! And, now I'll never get one! How could you do this to me?"
"Oh, I simply reversed a little heavenly script...Oops! I wasn't supposed to use that. Anyway. It all came out for the best, didn't it?" Basho looked up to see apparent deep sorrow in Nabiki's gaze, and for a moment the sight of her moping away toward school brought a troubled cloud to his brow.
The next moment, he brightened. "Of course! Heavenly script! That's how I can help Hiroshi!"
End: Chapter Fourteen