Chapter 3 Unwelcome Proposals
Author's Note: Same as usual; Harry Potter isn't mine, it's JK Rowling's
Yawning, Lily Evans shuffled down the stairs on her way to breakfast in the Great Hall. Although it was only October, not to mention only sixth year, most of the Hogwarts professors had been piling the homework onto the sixth years in preparation for NEWTS. As a result of this in addition to her prefect duties, Lily hadn't gotten much sleep of late. She had finally slept in a bit this morning, but she was still exhausted and had a prefect meeting about the Hogsmeade weekend on the 31st and the following Halloween feast as well as plenty of delayed homework to look forward to today. Also, Lily reflected, pushing open the doors of the Great Hall, she wanted to get that letter off to her parents and possibly make a start on the Potions essay due the following week.
Lily's reverie was interrupted by the realization that the Hufflepuff table seemed to be greatly excited by her presence, for some reason. They were all whispering excitedly and gesturing towards her, and several of the girls looked quite militant.
Uneasy, Lily began to make her way to the Gryffindor table but as she approached the agitated Hufflepuffs, one of them, a seventh year Lily vaguely recognized as Gilderoy Lockhart, stood up and bestowed upon Lily what he considered to be a dazzling smile. Uneasily, Lily moved forward a few more paces, unsure of what this strange behavior could mean.
Lockhart adjusted his already immaculate school robes and gave his perfectly coifed hair a pat before speaking in a jovial, booming voice.
"Lily Evans?" Lockhart began with another toothy grin. "Today is your lucky day because today your long unrequited dream is finally coming true," Lockhart paused for dramatic effect, which was quite unnecessary as he had the entire hall's avid attention. Lily's face was so flushed it literally felt as though it were on fire.
Lockhart took Lily's hand and began to bring it to his lips to kiss it, but Lily's look of horrified outrage and implied menace stopped him, so he held onto it rather awkwardly, looking momentarily at a loss.
Unfortunately Lockhart regained his composure and continued with his embarrassing declaration. "Lily, I am smitten by your pealing laughter and fiery beauty. Quite simply you have taken my heart by surprise and it can be silent no longer. It cries out to you and you must answer its call. Lily Evans, in front of all of our friends, peers, esteemed professors and other well wishers, will you accompany me to the Hogsmeade weekend?"
"Forgive me if I have taken you by surprise, clearly you are overwhelmed by your good fortune," Lockhart added as an afterthought when Lily didn't immediately respond. For her part, Lily, dumbfounded by the level of humiliation she was experiencing, was trying desperately to get control of her rage.
Lily yanked her hand from Lockhart's ridiculous grasp and took a deep breath.
"NO!" Lily shouted at the top of her lungs before turning on her heel and dashing out of the Great Hall.
"I'll, er, give you some time to think it over, shall I?" Lockhart called weakly after her retreating back. He then turned back to his avid audience, most of whom had begun to snigger. "Women," Lockhart chuckled unconvincingly. "Always have to play hard to get, eh?" With that Lockhart sat back down looking rather dejected where at least half of Hufflepuff's female population, who looked considerably more cheery than they had at Lily's arrival, did their best to comfort him.
Over at the Gryffindor table, Sirius was splitting his sides with laughter at the scene that had just transpired.
"Did.......you.....see....Evans'....face? gasped Sirius between chuckles. "I....thought....she.......was going.....to.....pop!" Sirius doubled over as a new wave of mirth hit him. Morwenna Marchbanks shot him a look of deep disgust before rising to find Lily.
"Come on....it was.....funny...she.....looked.....like.....a....Chinese.....Fireball!"
Alice Prewett frowned across the table at Sirius, a look of indecision on her face. After another moment of his wheezing, she seemed to come to some conclusion, then kicked Sirius swiftly in the shins before following Morwenna.
"OW!" Sirius howled, all trace of mirth forgotten. "Well it was funny!" he defended himself to James, who looked severely out of sorts.
"Shut it, Padfoot!" James snapped, turning to face the Great Hall's entrance.
"She didn't have to kick me!" Sirius turned to Remus.
Remus merely shook his head. "I would've done it myself, Padfoot, but she beat me to it." This statement was accompanied by vigorous nods from Kathleen Kirkpatrick and Dorcas Meadows, both of whom scowled at Sirius menacingly.
"I thought it was funny," Peter offered comfortingly.
Somehow, this failed to console Sirius.
In Gryffindor Tower, Lily was pacing the sixth year girls' dormitory furiously, her face still flushed, as Alice and Morwenna looked on from one of the beds.
"How dare that prat humiliate me in front of the ENTIRE SCHOOL?" Lily stormed, not for the first time.
"Er.....I think he thought it was romantic," Morwenna offered hesitantly.
"Since when do romance and public humiliation go together? Even Professor Dumbledore chuckled!" Lily shrieked.
"Since it's Lockhart The Giant Prat," Alice pointed out in reply to Lily's first statement. "And Professor Dumbledore did NOT chuckle."
"Yes he did!" Lily insisted. "I saw him!"
"Well if he did it was at Gilderoy and not at you, it wasn't your fault he's an arrogant berk," Alice soothed.
"How will I ever show my face outside of this room again?" Lily moaned, burying her face in her hands. "The entire school is laughing at me."
Just then the door opened to reveal Kathleen and Dorcas, bearing food and drink and just in time to hear Lily's last comment.
"The entire school is not laughing at you," Dorcas said firmly. "Just Sirius Black and Alice kicked him hard in the shin; that shut him up in a right hurry." The others giggled as Alice blushed, looking slightly abashed.
"Did you really kick him?" Morwenna asked incredulously.
"She certainly did," Kathleen said proudly, putting her arm around Alice's shoulder.
"It was a great moment for womankind," Dorcas chuckled. "Giving a little back for all the pain he's caused witches everywhere." The girls giggled again, their mood considerably lightened as Kathleen and Dorcas began handing round the toast, scones, and pumpkin juice.
Despite their differences and popular wisdom that girls can't get along in a group setting, the five Gryffindor sixth year girls got on remarkably well together; were all fairly close friends in fact who regularly stuck together against the randy and rowdy Marauders, the catty Slytherin girls, and any other random prats who cared to try their collective patience.
And they were most definitely diverse. Alice, with her cherubic face, wispy blonde hair, blue button eyes, and sympathetic air, was everyone's favorite confidante and surprisingly determined under her mostly sweet demeanor. Dorcas, a doe-eyed, caramel-skinned witch, was quick-witted and sarcastic, Kathleen, a halfblood witch with a bubbly, ebullient personality, was a social butterfly and source of all Hogwarts gossip. Morwenna was the sophisticate and unspoken group leader, and Lily was the acknowledged brain whose unfortunate luck in the romance department quite often had the others on the defensive.
"I suppose Potter was laughing right there alongside Black," Lily said with a shudder after a bit.
"Actually he looked pretty put out," Kathleen replied, brushing some crumbs off of her robes.
"He's probably just sorry that Lockhart did it first," Lily snorted, her anger beginning to return. "And that still brings us to the problem of how in the bloody hell I'm supposed to show my face 'round here again."
"Mostly everyone will be laughing at Lockhart, not you," Dorcas pointed out reasonably.
"The Slytherins might take the mickey out of you a bit, but they're such utter asses anyway you can't expect much better," Morwenna amended Dorcas' statement.
"Brilliant! Just bloody brilliant! I can't show my face around Hogwarts again because of Lockhart, and I can't even strangle him for it without being sent to Azkaban to rot. " Lily exclaimed, frustrated.
"Look on the bright side, Lils," Dorcas drawled in a dry tone. "At least in Azkaban you won't have to face anyone but the dementors, and as far as I know they haven't heard about this little episode yet."
Lily wisely decided to barricade herself in her room for the better part of the day, but she couldn't hide indefinitely. For one thing, she couldn't miss her prefect meeting, and she reckoned the sooner she faced the rest of the world the sooner the whispering would stop.
Still, Lily crept down to the common room at about quarter to seven that evening filled with trepidation. How many people were in the common room? Cautiously she peered around the corner.
Damn her luck, but all four of the Marauders were in the common room, Sirius surrounded by his usual pack of girls, and a few others were scattered around the room as well. Lily made to duck back around the corner and up the stairs to find an alternate route out of Gryffindor tower, through the window if necessary, but it was too late. She had been spotted.
"Oy! Evans!" Sirius bellowed. "Sneaking off to answer the call of Lockhart's heart?" Most of the assembled Gryffindors burst into laughter.
"Why don't you go Stupefy yourself Black?" Lily snapped, blushing as red as her hair and making her way to the portrait hole as quickly as possible.
"Seems she is indeed as fiery as 'fiery beauty' implies, eh?" Sirius drawled, folding his arms as the girls around him twittered. Lily spun around.
"And how is your shin, Black?" Lily inquired sweetly. "I do hope Alice didn't go too hard on you." With that parting shot, Lily pushed the portrait open and hurried out into the corridor, leaving a scowling Sirius and a blushing Alice in her wake.
"Wow," said Frank Longbottom in genuine awe and glanced around at Alice, who blushed even more.
"Serves you right, mate," Remus said, nudging Sirius' shoulder on his way to the portrait hole.
"That's loyalty for you. I like that!" Sirius turned indignantly to James, who was scowling as well.
"Just shut it Padfoot," James growled and stormed upstairs, leaving Sirius to be comforted by the crowd of girls, who were the only ones not sniggering at Sirius for having been gotten the best of by sweet little Alice Prewett.
James slammed the dormitory door shut behind him and kicked the nearest pile of clothes out of his way before pacing the room restlessly, some very conflicting emotions churning around in his gut.
First off, he was ragingly, and even he had to admit, ridiculously jealous over this whole Lockhart affair. How dare that wanker attempt to claim his property in front of the entire school? His intended property at any rate, James amended.
Also, it was perfectly clear how upset Lily was over the whole disastrous episode, which consequently upset James. Even though he did love to watch her get so spitting mad, her eyes flashing, fists clenched, her posture ramrod straight. James loved her when she was her usual poised self as well, the envy of every girl, the object of every boy's affection, and she herself ignoring it all, just so graceful and perfect and at ease. It was great fun to watch her lose that exterior.
But not like this. Not with her shaking hands and voice and her humiliation and apprehension clear in every line of her body, every gesture, every word and expression.
Then, of course, Sirius has to be so sarcastic and blatantly sexual and just so damned, well - Sirius and upset Lily even further. For the first time in his life, James disliked his best friend. How could he kick Lily when she was down, so to speak? It had been cruel, and all just to get a laugh from a few random people in the common room.
The door creaked open to reveal Sirius lounging casually in the doorframe.
"What's eating you, mate, as if I didn't already know?" Sirius inquired, advancing into the room to lean against the far wall.
"Nothing, not that you should care," James muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Sirius cocked an eyebrow.
"What do you think it means? Why'd you say those things to Lily just now? Why were you laughing at her earlier?"
"Look, Prongs, sorry if I offended you or was out of line. Really I am." Sirius moved into the room. "But take a step back, mate. You'd've been laughing right there alongside me if it'd been anyone but Evans."
James' shoulders slumped in defeat, knowing that his best friend was right. Still, he scowled at Sirius anyway, for appearances' sake.
"That's all right, Prongs," Sirius grinned magnanimously. "You've been mad about Evans since you were eleven years old, it's bound to bring out your softer side eventually. But honestly, James," Sirius' tone sobered. "This could be your chance to show Evans that you're not the great prat she thinks you are."
How exactly?" James asked, skeptical.
Sirius grinned. "Well, I was out of line, wasn't I?" James nodded, puzzled. "So go apologize for me."
James' infectious grin, the one few people saw without its customary touch of arrogance, widened. "I think I just might. Thanks, Padfoot."
Unfortunately, the teasing got a lot worse before it got better. Lily seemed to be getting an equally large share of it as Lockhart, which meant Lily spent the next few days with a constant tension, a perpetual bad mood, and an overheated sensation from the constant, violent blushing at some of her peers' randier comments.
By Friday afternoon Lily had had just about enough and was ready to hex the next person who spoke to her. So when she heard an "All right, Evans?" behind her on her way back to the Gryffindor common room, she swung around with her wand at the ready and the incantation for the Bat Bogey Hex on the tip of her tongue, to face...... James Potter.
"Take it easy, Evans," James said with a lopsided grin, backing away slowly from her wand tip.
"Ugh, I'm really in no fit state to deal with YOU right now, so let's just make this easy on both of us, shall we?" Lily's temper had finally snapped, as it tended to do in James' presence, and she was determined to take no prisoners. "So to answer the questions you were just about to ask me, yes, I am on my way right now to shag Lockhart senseless, yes, that IS his heart calling to mine that you hear, and yes, we have set a wedding date. In fact, I want you to be the ringbearer. So if we've covered it, I think I'll just be on my way, wouldn't want to keep darling Gilderoy waiting too long, especially when we could be shagging like animals."
Taking a deep breath, Lily turned on her heel and was just about to walk down the corridor as quickly as her dignity would allow when a hand on her shoulder stopped her.
"No, it's just.....er....." James ran his hand through his hair yet again, causing Lily to grit her teeth in irritation. "It's just that I wanted to apologize for what Sirius said and did the other night. In the common room. He's my best mate and all, but he can be a bit of a prat sometimes and, well, he was out of line. You shouldn't have to worry about your own house turning on you." James stopped, waiting in agony for what Lily would say next.
"Thanks," Lily said very softly, twisting a lock of that fascinating scarlet hair around her finger and shifting her weight from foot to foot.
James was completely flabbergasted. She had thanked him! Civilly! Without sarcasm! It was such a heady feeling, in fact, that he felt all of the cockiness Lily deplored rising to the surface.
"You know, Evans," James purred in a seductive tone, leaning ever so slightly closer with his trademark audacious grin. "There is a way to stop all of this teasing and to prevent that wanker Lockhart from ever bothering you again." James paused and Lily rolled her eyes, knowing what was coming, yet was powerless to stop it.
"If you were my girlfriend," James continued, mussing his hair with his hand again. "Lockhart and all of those berks giving you grief about him would leave you alone because they all know that I'd hex the living shit out of anyone who-"
"We've been over this Potter," Lily cut him off in an exaggeratedly patient, listen-with-mother tone, her vivid green eyes flashing fire. "I. Will. Never. Be. Your. Girlfriend."
"Did anyone ever tell you you're beautiful when you're patronizing me?" James smirked, his heart rolling over yet again.
"OH!!!" Lily couldn't remember ever wanting to hit somebody more in her entire life and that included Petunia, which said very much about her feelings indeed. "You, you, arrogant......presumptuous......" Lily's ability to form coherent sentences seemed to have deserted her.
"You know what you need, Evans?" James' seductive tone seemed to have, if possible, intensified. "A good shag. It would do wonders for your relaxation, not to mention this hostility you seem to be suppressing."
That just about tore it. Lily knew she had to get out of there before she did something rash.
"A good shag you say," Lily mused, feigning a detachment she definitely did not feel. "Well, even if I did, it certainly wouldn't be with YOU because, you see, I'd just as soon SHAG THE GIANT SQUID!!!!"
With that, Lily stormed off down the hall, leaving James crestfallen and momentarily at a loss behind her. But only momentarily.
"I'm sure that could be arranged," James called after her. "He could use a good shag!!"
But if Lily heard him, she gave no indication.
Author's Note: Same as usual; Harry Potter isn't mine, it's JK Rowling's
Yawning, Lily Evans shuffled down the stairs on her way to breakfast in the Great Hall. Although it was only October, not to mention only sixth year, most of the Hogwarts professors had been piling the homework onto the sixth years in preparation for NEWTS. As a result of this in addition to her prefect duties, Lily hadn't gotten much sleep of late. She had finally slept in a bit this morning, but she was still exhausted and had a prefect meeting about the Hogsmeade weekend on the 31st and the following Halloween feast as well as plenty of delayed homework to look forward to today. Also, Lily reflected, pushing open the doors of the Great Hall, she wanted to get that letter off to her parents and possibly make a start on the Potions essay due the following week.
Lily's reverie was interrupted by the realization that the Hufflepuff table seemed to be greatly excited by her presence, for some reason. They were all whispering excitedly and gesturing towards her, and several of the girls looked quite militant.
Uneasy, Lily began to make her way to the Gryffindor table but as she approached the agitated Hufflepuffs, one of them, a seventh year Lily vaguely recognized as Gilderoy Lockhart, stood up and bestowed upon Lily what he considered to be a dazzling smile. Uneasily, Lily moved forward a few more paces, unsure of what this strange behavior could mean.
Lockhart adjusted his already immaculate school robes and gave his perfectly coifed hair a pat before speaking in a jovial, booming voice.
"Lily Evans?" Lockhart began with another toothy grin. "Today is your lucky day because today your long unrequited dream is finally coming true," Lockhart paused for dramatic effect, which was quite unnecessary as he had the entire hall's avid attention. Lily's face was so flushed it literally felt as though it were on fire.
Lockhart took Lily's hand and began to bring it to his lips to kiss it, but Lily's look of horrified outrage and implied menace stopped him, so he held onto it rather awkwardly, looking momentarily at a loss.
Unfortunately Lockhart regained his composure and continued with his embarrassing declaration. "Lily, I am smitten by your pealing laughter and fiery beauty. Quite simply you have taken my heart by surprise and it can be silent no longer. It cries out to you and you must answer its call. Lily Evans, in front of all of our friends, peers, esteemed professors and other well wishers, will you accompany me to the Hogsmeade weekend?"
"Forgive me if I have taken you by surprise, clearly you are overwhelmed by your good fortune," Lockhart added as an afterthought when Lily didn't immediately respond. For her part, Lily, dumbfounded by the level of humiliation she was experiencing, was trying desperately to get control of her rage.
Lily yanked her hand from Lockhart's ridiculous grasp and took a deep breath.
"NO!" Lily shouted at the top of her lungs before turning on her heel and dashing out of the Great Hall.
"I'll, er, give you some time to think it over, shall I?" Lockhart called weakly after her retreating back. He then turned back to his avid audience, most of whom had begun to snigger. "Women," Lockhart chuckled unconvincingly. "Always have to play hard to get, eh?" With that Lockhart sat back down looking rather dejected where at least half of Hufflepuff's female population, who looked considerably more cheery than they had at Lily's arrival, did their best to comfort him.
Over at the Gryffindor table, Sirius was splitting his sides with laughter at the scene that had just transpired.
"Did.......you.....see....Evans'....face? gasped Sirius between chuckles. "I....thought....she.......was going.....to.....pop!" Sirius doubled over as a new wave of mirth hit him. Morwenna Marchbanks shot him a look of deep disgust before rising to find Lily.
"Come on....it was.....funny...she.....looked.....like.....a....Chinese.....Fireball!"
Alice Prewett frowned across the table at Sirius, a look of indecision on her face. After another moment of his wheezing, she seemed to come to some conclusion, then kicked Sirius swiftly in the shins before following Morwenna.
"OW!" Sirius howled, all trace of mirth forgotten. "Well it was funny!" he defended himself to James, who looked severely out of sorts.
"Shut it, Padfoot!" James snapped, turning to face the Great Hall's entrance.
"She didn't have to kick me!" Sirius turned to Remus.
Remus merely shook his head. "I would've done it myself, Padfoot, but she beat me to it." This statement was accompanied by vigorous nods from Kathleen Kirkpatrick and Dorcas Meadows, both of whom scowled at Sirius menacingly.
"I thought it was funny," Peter offered comfortingly.
Somehow, this failed to console Sirius.
In Gryffindor Tower, Lily was pacing the sixth year girls' dormitory furiously, her face still flushed, as Alice and Morwenna looked on from one of the beds.
"How dare that prat humiliate me in front of the ENTIRE SCHOOL?" Lily stormed, not for the first time.
"Er.....I think he thought it was romantic," Morwenna offered hesitantly.
"Since when do romance and public humiliation go together? Even Professor Dumbledore chuckled!" Lily shrieked.
"Since it's Lockhart The Giant Prat," Alice pointed out in reply to Lily's first statement. "And Professor Dumbledore did NOT chuckle."
"Yes he did!" Lily insisted. "I saw him!"
"Well if he did it was at Gilderoy and not at you, it wasn't your fault he's an arrogant berk," Alice soothed.
"How will I ever show my face outside of this room again?" Lily moaned, burying her face in her hands. "The entire school is laughing at me."
Just then the door opened to reveal Kathleen and Dorcas, bearing food and drink and just in time to hear Lily's last comment.
"The entire school is not laughing at you," Dorcas said firmly. "Just Sirius Black and Alice kicked him hard in the shin; that shut him up in a right hurry." The others giggled as Alice blushed, looking slightly abashed.
"Did you really kick him?" Morwenna asked incredulously.
"She certainly did," Kathleen said proudly, putting her arm around Alice's shoulder.
"It was a great moment for womankind," Dorcas chuckled. "Giving a little back for all the pain he's caused witches everywhere." The girls giggled again, their mood considerably lightened as Kathleen and Dorcas began handing round the toast, scones, and pumpkin juice.
Despite their differences and popular wisdom that girls can't get along in a group setting, the five Gryffindor sixth year girls got on remarkably well together; were all fairly close friends in fact who regularly stuck together against the randy and rowdy Marauders, the catty Slytherin girls, and any other random prats who cared to try their collective patience.
And they were most definitely diverse. Alice, with her cherubic face, wispy blonde hair, blue button eyes, and sympathetic air, was everyone's favorite confidante and surprisingly determined under her mostly sweet demeanor. Dorcas, a doe-eyed, caramel-skinned witch, was quick-witted and sarcastic, Kathleen, a halfblood witch with a bubbly, ebullient personality, was a social butterfly and source of all Hogwarts gossip. Morwenna was the sophisticate and unspoken group leader, and Lily was the acknowledged brain whose unfortunate luck in the romance department quite often had the others on the defensive.
"I suppose Potter was laughing right there alongside Black," Lily said with a shudder after a bit.
"Actually he looked pretty put out," Kathleen replied, brushing some crumbs off of her robes.
"He's probably just sorry that Lockhart did it first," Lily snorted, her anger beginning to return. "And that still brings us to the problem of how in the bloody hell I'm supposed to show my face 'round here again."
"Mostly everyone will be laughing at Lockhart, not you," Dorcas pointed out reasonably.
"The Slytherins might take the mickey out of you a bit, but they're such utter asses anyway you can't expect much better," Morwenna amended Dorcas' statement.
"Brilliant! Just bloody brilliant! I can't show my face around Hogwarts again because of Lockhart, and I can't even strangle him for it without being sent to Azkaban to rot. " Lily exclaimed, frustrated.
"Look on the bright side, Lils," Dorcas drawled in a dry tone. "At least in Azkaban you won't have to face anyone but the dementors, and as far as I know they haven't heard about this little episode yet."
Lily wisely decided to barricade herself in her room for the better part of the day, but she couldn't hide indefinitely. For one thing, she couldn't miss her prefect meeting, and she reckoned the sooner she faced the rest of the world the sooner the whispering would stop.
Still, Lily crept down to the common room at about quarter to seven that evening filled with trepidation. How many people were in the common room? Cautiously she peered around the corner.
Damn her luck, but all four of the Marauders were in the common room, Sirius surrounded by his usual pack of girls, and a few others were scattered around the room as well. Lily made to duck back around the corner and up the stairs to find an alternate route out of Gryffindor tower, through the window if necessary, but it was too late. She had been spotted.
"Oy! Evans!" Sirius bellowed. "Sneaking off to answer the call of Lockhart's heart?" Most of the assembled Gryffindors burst into laughter.
"Why don't you go Stupefy yourself Black?" Lily snapped, blushing as red as her hair and making her way to the portrait hole as quickly as possible.
"Seems she is indeed as fiery as 'fiery beauty' implies, eh?" Sirius drawled, folding his arms as the girls around him twittered. Lily spun around.
"And how is your shin, Black?" Lily inquired sweetly. "I do hope Alice didn't go too hard on you." With that parting shot, Lily pushed the portrait open and hurried out into the corridor, leaving a scowling Sirius and a blushing Alice in her wake.
"Wow," said Frank Longbottom in genuine awe and glanced around at Alice, who blushed even more.
"Serves you right, mate," Remus said, nudging Sirius' shoulder on his way to the portrait hole.
"That's loyalty for you. I like that!" Sirius turned indignantly to James, who was scowling as well.
"Just shut it Padfoot," James growled and stormed upstairs, leaving Sirius to be comforted by the crowd of girls, who were the only ones not sniggering at Sirius for having been gotten the best of by sweet little Alice Prewett.
James slammed the dormitory door shut behind him and kicked the nearest pile of clothes out of his way before pacing the room restlessly, some very conflicting emotions churning around in his gut.
First off, he was ragingly, and even he had to admit, ridiculously jealous over this whole Lockhart affair. How dare that wanker attempt to claim his property in front of the entire school? His intended property at any rate, James amended.
Also, it was perfectly clear how upset Lily was over the whole disastrous episode, which consequently upset James. Even though he did love to watch her get so spitting mad, her eyes flashing, fists clenched, her posture ramrod straight. James loved her when she was her usual poised self as well, the envy of every girl, the object of every boy's affection, and she herself ignoring it all, just so graceful and perfect and at ease. It was great fun to watch her lose that exterior.
But not like this. Not with her shaking hands and voice and her humiliation and apprehension clear in every line of her body, every gesture, every word and expression.
Then, of course, Sirius has to be so sarcastic and blatantly sexual and just so damned, well - Sirius and upset Lily even further. For the first time in his life, James disliked his best friend. How could he kick Lily when she was down, so to speak? It had been cruel, and all just to get a laugh from a few random people in the common room.
The door creaked open to reveal Sirius lounging casually in the doorframe.
"What's eating you, mate, as if I didn't already know?" Sirius inquired, advancing into the room to lean against the far wall.
"Nothing, not that you should care," James muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Sirius cocked an eyebrow.
"What do you think it means? Why'd you say those things to Lily just now? Why were you laughing at her earlier?"
"Look, Prongs, sorry if I offended you or was out of line. Really I am." Sirius moved into the room. "But take a step back, mate. You'd've been laughing right there alongside me if it'd been anyone but Evans."
James' shoulders slumped in defeat, knowing that his best friend was right. Still, he scowled at Sirius anyway, for appearances' sake.
"That's all right, Prongs," Sirius grinned magnanimously. "You've been mad about Evans since you were eleven years old, it's bound to bring out your softer side eventually. But honestly, James," Sirius' tone sobered. "This could be your chance to show Evans that you're not the great prat she thinks you are."
How exactly?" James asked, skeptical.
Sirius grinned. "Well, I was out of line, wasn't I?" James nodded, puzzled. "So go apologize for me."
James' infectious grin, the one few people saw without its customary touch of arrogance, widened. "I think I just might. Thanks, Padfoot."
Unfortunately, the teasing got a lot worse before it got better. Lily seemed to be getting an equally large share of it as Lockhart, which meant Lily spent the next few days with a constant tension, a perpetual bad mood, and an overheated sensation from the constant, violent blushing at some of her peers' randier comments.
By Friday afternoon Lily had had just about enough and was ready to hex the next person who spoke to her. So when she heard an "All right, Evans?" behind her on her way back to the Gryffindor common room, she swung around with her wand at the ready and the incantation for the Bat Bogey Hex on the tip of her tongue, to face...... James Potter.
"Take it easy, Evans," James said with a lopsided grin, backing away slowly from her wand tip.
"Ugh, I'm really in no fit state to deal with YOU right now, so let's just make this easy on both of us, shall we?" Lily's temper had finally snapped, as it tended to do in James' presence, and she was determined to take no prisoners. "So to answer the questions you were just about to ask me, yes, I am on my way right now to shag Lockhart senseless, yes, that IS his heart calling to mine that you hear, and yes, we have set a wedding date. In fact, I want you to be the ringbearer. So if we've covered it, I think I'll just be on my way, wouldn't want to keep darling Gilderoy waiting too long, especially when we could be shagging like animals."
Taking a deep breath, Lily turned on her heel and was just about to walk down the corridor as quickly as her dignity would allow when a hand on her shoulder stopped her.
"No, it's just.....er....." James ran his hand through his hair yet again, causing Lily to grit her teeth in irritation. "It's just that I wanted to apologize for what Sirius said and did the other night. In the common room. He's my best mate and all, but he can be a bit of a prat sometimes and, well, he was out of line. You shouldn't have to worry about your own house turning on you." James stopped, waiting in agony for what Lily would say next.
"Thanks," Lily said very softly, twisting a lock of that fascinating scarlet hair around her finger and shifting her weight from foot to foot.
James was completely flabbergasted. She had thanked him! Civilly! Without sarcasm! It was such a heady feeling, in fact, that he felt all of the cockiness Lily deplored rising to the surface.
"You know, Evans," James purred in a seductive tone, leaning ever so slightly closer with his trademark audacious grin. "There is a way to stop all of this teasing and to prevent that wanker Lockhart from ever bothering you again." James paused and Lily rolled her eyes, knowing what was coming, yet was powerless to stop it.
"If you were my girlfriend," James continued, mussing his hair with his hand again. "Lockhart and all of those berks giving you grief about him would leave you alone because they all know that I'd hex the living shit out of anyone who-"
"We've been over this Potter," Lily cut him off in an exaggeratedly patient, listen-with-mother tone, her vivid green eyes flashing fire. "I. Will. Never. Be. Your. Girlfriend."
"Did anyone ever tell you you're beautiful when you're patronizing me?" James smirked, his heart rolling over yet again.
"OH!!!" Lily couldn't remember ever wanting to hit somebody more in her entire life and that included Petunia, which said very much about her feelings indeed. "You, you, arrogant......presumptuous......" Lily's ability to form coherent sentences seemed to have deserted her.
"You know what you need, Evans?" James' seductive tone seemed to have, if possible, intensified. "A good shag. It would do wonders for your relaxation, not to mention this hostility you seem to be suppressing."
That just about tore it. Lily knew she had to get out of there before she did something rash.
"A good shag you say," Lily mused, feigning a detachment she definitely did not feel. "Well, even if I did, it certainly wouldn't be with YOU because, you see, I'd just as soon SHAG THE GIANT SQUID!!!!"
With that, Lily stormed off down the hall, leaving James crestfallen and momentarily at a loss behind her. But only momentarily.
"I'm sure that could be arranged," James called after her. "He could use a good shag!!"
But if Lily heard him, she gave no indication.